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4 Reasons to Stop Waiting for Permission

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Making big changes and chasing dreams is hard work. It’s actually easier to coast through a “good enough” life. The problem is that we only get one life to live, and living a life of regret shouldn’t be YOUR option.

Too often, we think all the stars have to align before we can chase our true passion. We think that we have to be at a certain point, or that the circumstances have to be just right. We are constantly waiting for permission.

For 12 years I waited for permission to lose weight, quit a job I hated and move our family from Milwaukee, Wisconsin to our dream destination of Maui, Hawaii. The time I waited for permission sucked the life out of me.
In 2011, I realized that permission would never come, and if I wanted anything to happen, I was going to have to be the one to make it happen on my own. I had to take action.

It took three years and more of me than I thought was possible, but I lost 170 pounds, quit a terrible job, and moved our family to Maui, Hawaii. We’ve been here for 10 months and it’s far surpassed our expectations. I learned to stop waiting and start living.

We wait and wait, and those perfect circumstances never fall into place. Before we know it, life has already passed us by. We wait for approval from people who think they have our best interest at heart—we’re crushed when it never comes. We miss the amazing life that could be ours while we wait for permission.

Here are four reasons why we need to stop waiting for permission and chase dreams that too many people consider “impossible.”

 

1. We already know what it takes to achieve success

In the past, information was hard to come by—it wasn’t cost effective either. Today, the Internet and social media have made information abundant and free. No longer do we have to wait to learn what it takes to achieve our success. YouTube alone has more answers than we’ll be able to comprehend and implement.

If there’s anything you want to learn, the information is readily available. We don’t have to wait for permission or knowledge; we can research and take action. We can be the master of our destiny and create our own success.

 

2. We have amazing tools and technology

Remember how hard it was to get a book published a few years ago?

Remember when you had to send checks and money orders for payment for products and services?

Today, we can self-publish a book in minutes.

Today, we have Paypal and Stripe to take payments online instantly.

Social media and the Internet have opened doors that were previously closed by gatekeepers. We don’t have to wait. We can figure out exactly what we need to make progress from the comfort of our home.

 

John Assaraf Quote
 

3. We can have a solid support system

In the past, we tried to prove we could do this alone. We tried to chase big dreams and success, and pick ourselves up when things didn’t go as planned. Reaching out for help was considered a sign of weakness.

Today, we can have support in many ways and it’s considered a smart thing to do. Whether it’s family or a close friend, you can have that shoulder to cry on when things don’t go as planned.

Today, we can join or form mastermind groups that give us accountability and support with fellow dream chasers who are all over the world. We don’t have to do this all alone.

 

4. Life is too damn short

At the end of your life you’ll regret trying to play it safe. You won’t remember all the stuff you had; you’ll remember your experiences. Those experiences will be filled with amazing moments or things you regret.

When you wait for permission, you squander your most precious resource: your time.

My father died unexpectedly at 54. The two weeks before he died all he could talk about were his regrets. He’s gone now. He died too young and unable to do something about the things he regretted in his life.

It doesn’t have to take a death in your life for you to realize how quickly life goes by. You can probably remember what seemed like yesterday, but was years ago. Life is short. We only get one chance to make it count.

 

Here’s the biggest thing to understand: no one will ever give you permission. Your doubt and fear will never give you permission. If you’re going to experience success in your life, you have to step outside of your comfort zone and take action.

It’s going to be hard. It’s not going to happen overnight. It’s going to be harder than seems necessary, but your dream is possible. More than that, once you reach your success, you’ll realize the struggle was worth it.

Stop waiting to claim the life you truly deserve. The stars will never be perfectly aligned, but that’s OK. This is your journey and the bumps and bruise make it special. They teach you to appreciate what you have.

Are you waiting for permission?

 

Kimanzi Constable is an author of four books and a writer whose articles have been published in Forbes, Entrepreneur Magazine, Business Insider, SUCCESS Magazine, NBC, CBS, FOX, and 80 other publications and magazines. He is the co-founder of Results Global Impact Consulting and Senior Editor at The Good Men Project. Learn more and get a free guide at kconstable.com.

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A Simple but Effective Technique to Be More Confident

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Many people want to learn how to be confident in different situations, but it’s not always easy. Maybe we’re too addicted to comparing ourselves or maybe social media has brainwashed us to believe that we should all be rich, famous, and in incredible shape. (more…)

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Knowing Your Message vs Delivering Your Message

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Have you ever sent a text message only to have it misinterpreted by the person reading it? Happens all the time. Have you ever given a presentation that you were totally prepared for only to have it fall flat? Happens all the time. Have you ever had someone ask you something like, “Why are you mad?” when you were not at all mad? Happens all the time. (more…)

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The 3 Most Important Things I Learned About Personal Growth

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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?

In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far. 

These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.

1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.

This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.

What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou

2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.

This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .

3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.

When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.

However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!

The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!

If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!

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​​4 Boss Level Growth Strategies That Create an Optimized Life

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Building a business is about more than sales, marketing, and flexing on social media. While those things tend to draw attention, they attract the wrong type of clients and are not how you build a sustainable and freedom-focused business. (more…)

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