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4 Actionable Steps to Elevate Your Charisma

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Do you ever walk around your streets or hang out with friends and family and wonder how some people are simply so likeable? You might love them or hate them yourself, but do you ever wish that you had that level of confidence?

Well, contrary to popular belief, nobody is born with charisma, it’s something that is learned. By boosting your charisma, you will automatically become more magnetic to other people. You’ll come across as being more trustworthy, more loyal, more persuasive and therefore enabling you to build deeper and stronger relationships with the people in your life.

Today, we’re going to explore four actionable steps you can take in order to train your mind to enhance your levels charisma, helping you to become the person you want to be in the life that you want to live.

1. Develop a Presence

Presence is considered the most important and essential aspect that contributes to charisma. If you’ve ever been in the surrounding area of someone that has a ‘presence’, you’ll know exactly what I mean when you feel drawn to that person, and you feel as though you can talk to them about anything.

In addition to this, being ‘present’ is also vital to charisma. Being in the present moment means that the person you’re talking to has your full attention, and your mind isn’t off wandering on what you’re doing at the weekend or what you’re having for dinner that night.

Being present and actually listening to what the other person in front of you has to say is a great way to build relationships with people as well as expanding your own horizons and knowledge. By being ‘present, you’ll create your own ‘presence’. However, it’s vital that you find balance as having too much ‘presence’ can lead to large and unwanted amounts of ego.

“The most beautiful thing you can wear is confidence.” – Blake Lively

2. Build Your Confidence

Of course, the second most important aspect when it comes to charisma is confidence. However, this is also considered one of the most difficult traits to build. The less confidence you have, the less charismatic you’ll be. In comparison, too much charisma and you’ll be perceived as arrogant.

However, at its core, confidence is all about how you feel in your own skin. By eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly and wearing the clothes that you want to wear can all contribute to how you feel about yourself. The more comfortable you feel, the more confident you’ll be.

3. Speak Truth to BS

Nowadays, thanks to platforms such as social media and the incessant drive to know everything about everything, false truths are evident in our everyday lives. However, even if we’re the ones lying or over-exaggerating a story, we can tell the other person doesn’t believe it, but it carries on anyway.

If you’ve ever been BS’d to, you’ll know how it feels when you know it to be false. However, a crucial aspect of charisma is admitting when you don’t know something in order to progress a conversation. Showing curiosity in what somebody is saying to you, listening to what they have to say and not giving the impression that you know everything about everything is one of the best ways to show your charisma.

More often than not, especially with how society is these days, acting in this way will surprise the people you’re talking to. If someone is speaking BS to you, although it can be an extremely hard conversation to have, speaking truth to them, i.e. calling them out on it, can help you build deeper relationships with these people which is an extremely charismatic thing to do.

You don’t have to be rude about it. If you’re talking about a political debate and someone quotes a figure, simply ask them where they heard or read that fact for proof. This level of curiosity allows you to drop the ‘defensive guard’ you would normally have up when BSing yourself and allows you to feel like you’re yourself when around other people. Live with purpose.

“If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life.” – Marcus Garvey

4. Master the Art of Conversation

In short, any charismatic person knows how to have and hold a conversation. They can start a conversation with anybody, steer it in any direction and, most importantly, can make the other people in the conversation feel comfortable.

These are the basic guidelines for having a proper conversation, and it can take practice if you don’t possess it already. However, it’s not impossible. If talking to a complete stranger scares the hell out of you, the only thing to do is bite the bullet and jump straight in. Once you realise you’ve got nothing to lose and can only gain conversational experience which will improve instantly, you’ll be able to get better and better over time until you master the art completely.

Of course, the best way to start a conversation is by being nice, rather than trying to overwhelm the other person with information or showing off, mentioned above. Avoid awkward silences, make eye contact, and you’ll see the rewards instantly in every conversation you have.

How do you boost your charisma? Comment below!

Jennifer Scott works as online editor at Best Australian Writers. Also, she is a business developer that works in different areas of education, technology, security and various types of online marketing. Prior to business developing Jennifer was consultant at Deloitte, and managed security services provider and developer of a wide range of security solutions.

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5 Comments

5 Comments

  1. Francis Thomas

    Oct 3, 2018 at 2:49 pm

    I have no words to to say, specifically for a motive that it is pretty authentic what you have got written and shared right here. It’s everywhere inside everyone who preserve thinking that way as you’ll assume out of clear information. I’m a writer and have some good experiences dealing with topics that deals with injustice in terms of human caring between the individuals

  2. Aaron Force

    Mar 2, 2018 at 10:37 pm

    I love the topic of charisma, so thanks for sharing! I like to think of charisma as being larger-than-life and to be that requires a disregard for limits. Not in an arrogant way, just not limiting yourself mentally or in your physical or vocal expressiveness. For all of us who aren’t so charismatic, we are tense and restrained. Confidence, as you address, is key.

    These are all wonderful reminders and extremely helpful. Thanks for sharing!

  3. Christopher Moskowitz

    Feb 26, 2018 at 3:41 pm

    Another thing to do is follow other people that have great charisma. If you watch a Jim Carrey Movie or just follow some friends that everyone likes, you’ll be set.

  4. Miguel A Lozano

    Jan 30, 2018 at 7:10 pm

    Great article Jennifer!

    It’s funny how being charismatic is simple.

    Now… I didn’t say easy, I said simple.

    And although trying to boost our charisma may scare the heck out of us, if you think of it, it’s basically being yourself and being comfortable with it.

    As you write Jennifer, when you feel comfortable with who you are and accept it, confidence starts to show up and charisma follows; and I don’t say it vainly, this made a HUGE difference for me.

    Another tip I used for working my confidence/charisma was to stop focusing on me and focusing on the other person. It helped me be present, really listen to the other personm and thus, develop ‘presence’.

    Wish you the best,
    Miguel A Lozano
    Personal RevUp

  5. Harsh Tiwari

    Jan 30, 2018 at 5:33 pm

    what an article – BrilliantRead

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Life

Don’t Want To Feel Like A Failure Anymore? Stop Doing These 6 Things

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It’s pretty annoying isn’t it? All those great and accomplished people telling you that FAILURE is a necessity on your way to success. Yeah, that’s easy for them to say; they’re already ‘on the other side’! You on the other hand, are still struggling all day everyday to get your business lifted off the ground and are really not that sure if you’re indeed going to make it.

There’s that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you don’t have the stuff to make it all happen. Not now and not ever. You feel like a failure…it’s holding you back and you don’t know how to deal with it. Well you could do yourself a favor and start dealing with it by doing the following things:

1. Stop Denying You Feel Like A Failure

Telling yourself things are going great when they’re not is one of the biggest, though most useless, coping mechanisms human beings deploy in rough times. Common denial signals among entrepreneurs: trying to regain more control by working even more hours and on the other side compensating this by letting go of all this control by partying and drinking way too hard.

What you’re doing is denying yourself the opportunity to actually feel what’s going on and acknowledge the problem; that both you and your business are in a bad place. Without acknowledging it, it’ll be pretty difficult to actually STOP feeling it. And remember, just because you feel like a failure, this does not mean that you indeed ARE a failure!

2. Stop Making It Bigger Than it Really Is

This is one of those other ‘fun’ things human beings do; we blow things way out of proportion in our heads! In business, when you lose that big client you’ve been working on for weeks, it feels like it’s the end of the world. You start doubting yourself, your strategy, your entire business model right up to the point where you barely sleep because you’re working on pivoting the whole thing.

But what if that customer simply didn’t have the money to go for your service anyway? Or what if they just decided to go for someone who is cheaper but who offers less quality? Does that mean there’s something wrong with YOU? Or that this was the ONLY customer out there and that you’re now doomed forever?

Of course not, it simply means that THIS CUSTOMER wasn’t a match. It’s a bit like dating actually…So if you take this into consideration, could it be that you just feel like a failure instead of really not succeeding in that what you want to at this point in time?

3. Stop Thinking You’re The Only One Who Feels Like This

You’re not! With the possible exception of the true sociopaths, that feeling you’re feeling is very normal to EVERYONE. It might not seem like it on the outside – because people don’t like to acknowledge this remember – but I can guarantee you that it’s true. But unlike 99% of the world’s population, YOU’RE not going to let this feeling stop you in your tracks. Are you?

4. Stop Thinking You’re Supposed To Be Superhuman

In fact, it’s very likely that you’re already doing, learning and succeeding at WAY more than most other people are. But for entrepreneurs, somehow, that never seems to be enough. You don’t just want to be successful after a few years of hard work (which is normal). You want to be successful after only a few months. Because you’re special…or at least you think you are…

Well, here’s the truth: you ARE special! But…it’s just not very likely that you’re one of those – very very rare – entrepreneurial superstars that – seemingly – just added some hot water and got instant business success as a result.

5. Stop Being So Incredibly Stubborn

Entrepreneurs are stubborn…almost by default. It’s what makes them push forward in the hardest of times. But…if you’re not doing the right things right you might just be hammering a square peg through a round hole. Which will only add to that frustrated feeling you’re already having. So why not stop being so stubborn for a moment, stop hammering away on that what obviously is not working and ask for help?

No matter who you ask – a business mentor or coach, a befriended entrepreneur – someone with a neutral perspective on you and our business will be very likely to see what’s going on with a lot more clarity than you can and can guide you to a place that will feel a whole lot more comfortable.

6. Stop Being Afraid Of Failure

I know, I know, you’ve heard this a million times before and you wouldn’t be in this pickle if you could do this. Right? I’m right there with ya!

But, if you get really rational about it, what’s the worst that could happen?

  • You might have to get a ‘real’ job for a while and start over on the side;
  • You might not be able to afford your rent anymore…but with Airbnb on the 1 hand and couchsurfing on the other, you should be able to work it out somehow;
  • You’ll have all the more experience to start over a whole lot faster;
  • You’ll be no less respected by anyone because it’s clear you gave it your all;
  • In a few years, when you’re an established and supersuccessful entrepreneur you’ll also have a cool failure story to tell;
  • None of your limbs will fall off;

Now that’s not too bad for a plan B is it? Failure is such a negative word. And the associated feeling is terrible and numbing. But really…how is giving it your all and not succeeding really the same as failing? Shouldn’t the definition of failure not be along the lines of ‘not even trying’ or ‘giving up when it gets hard’?

In other words: stop beating yourself up over this!

There’s really no need to feel like a failure at all because you’re sticking your neck out, you’re trying to make a difference and you’re still moving upward on that treacherous entrepreneurial mountain.

And that…is what success REALLY is.

Those Who Failed Their Way To Success

Quotes To Live By:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

“If you don’t try at anything, you can’t fail… it takes back bone to lead the life you want” – Richard Yates

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie

“Success is stumbling form failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm” – Winston Churchill

“Don’t let success go to your head and failure to your heart” – Will Smith

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Why You Never Have Enough Time and What You Need to Do About It

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Has this ever happened to you? You had an assignment, and the deadline was far away. You didn’t work on it much, but in the back of your mind, that insistent little voice was always whispering, “I gotta get this assignment done.” (more…)

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6 Unusual Exercises to Effectively Increase Your Creativity Faster Than Ever

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Although a vast majority of people think that creativity is something you are born with, the truth is a bit different. While we cannot deny that you need natural talent to a certain extent, stimulating creative thinking is indeed a matter of practice. If you give this thought a bit of thinking, you can realize pretty quickly that even the most fascinating and creative minds have faced the lack of creativity at some point in their lives. (more…)

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3 Psychological Facts That Can Unleash Your Inner Power

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Some people will achieve great things. Others won’t. But why is that? We’re all just “talking monkeys on an organic spaceship flying through the universe,” as Joe Rogan puts it. So why do some “talking monkeys” build 7 or 8 figure businesses, travel the world, and live the life of their dreams while the rest of us… well, wish we were living the life of our dreams. (more…)

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