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3 Ways To Let Go Of Envy And Be Comfortable With Your Own Path

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I have a confession to make. When I see someone else achieving one of my dreams, my stomach drops. I squint my eyes and frown, crossing my arms. With a big sigh, I lay back in my chair and start feeling bad about myself.

Seeing others thriving in your vocation while you’re still struggling can be tough and discouraging. You start to wonder why you’re so behind in the game, and start to think thoughts like, “Am I really good enough to do this? It’s already been done so well by others; what new value could I possibly bring?”

Good news: There is plenty of room for you to succeed in your own way, using your own unique talents. You just have to do a simple mindset switch, and start thinking of your successful peers as tools to further your learning.

Here are 3 tips to help you overcome jealousy and comparison to others, and to help you start accepting and honoring your personal journey:

1. Make peace with your current situation

What has brought you to this place in life? There may not be any good excuses for not accomplishing goals but there are reasons for where you’re at. Life is tough, and it takes time to both learn what we are passionate about, and how we can turn our passion into cash flow.

I drifted through college, doing mediocre work and naively believing things would just fall into place after graduation. When reality set in and I was left with thousands of dollars of debt and no job, I felt lost. It took me several years of awful, meaningless jobs until I finally learned that success takes very hard work, and that I would never be “discovered” or have anything handed to me.

You need to forgive yourself for whatever has held you back up to this point, stop beating yourself up for past failures and start thinking, “How can I move forward now?”

“Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.”– Albert Einstein 

2. Realize success takes time

This can be the most difficult step: becoming comfortable with moving slowly but surely, and realizing you are not going to become successful overnight. Success is a reflection of hard work over the long term, and it’s easy to get discouraged when you don’t see results immediately.

I once came across a very talented blogger that had started generating significant income in just a few short months, all while juggling a full-time job and 2 young children. Her success made me feel inadequate, since I had quit my job to stay home with my children a year ago, and hadn’t made much writing income yet.

I felt a strong need to prove myself immediately, and that same night I rushed out to the coffee shop with my laptop to feverishly work on my writing. Instead of being relaxed and productive, I had anxiety and writer’s block. I realized it was because I was forcing myself to write because I felt bad about myself, not because I was genuinely inspired. Keep your ego in check, and move at the pace that works best for you.

 

3. Engage with the people you envy

No matter where you’re at in your journey, you need other people who can show you the way. While rising to their enviable level of success, they’ve inevitably persevered through countless failures—all of which you can learn from. Acknowledge that they deserve their success, then ask yourself, what can I learn from them? Soak in all what they have to offer, and then take it a step further and reach out to them.

When I come across a blogger I admire, I shoot them a quick email thanking them for inspiring me and then asking a couple short, thoughtful questions about how they got to where they are. They are usually thrilled to receive the compliment, and more than happy to share a little wisdom.

Emulating and learning from successful people will help you tremendously in your own journey, but don’t get caught up in comparing yourself to them. Everyone has different skills and life experiences, and your path will never match perfectly with someone else’s.

“Envy blinds men and makes it impossible for them to think clearly.” – Malcolm X 

Maybe what you dream of doing has been done before, but not with your personal style and unique perspective. There is plenty of room for you in the game, so allow yourself to let go of jealousy and be inspired by others. After all, there was a point in their lives when they were exactly where you are.

When are you going to let go of envy? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below! 

Ivy Shelden is a freelance writer and the founder of The World Is Yours, a blog dedicated to helping people get in touch with free will and the power to create their own lives.

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7 Comments

7 Comments

  1. Teresa

    Jan 29, 2016 at 1:36 pm

    Thanks for writing this article, you give a fresh, new perspective to the “jealousy” issue. Thank you.

    • Ivy Shelden

      Feb 1, 2016 at 3:08 pm

      You are welcome Teresa, I know it’s something we all struggle with from time to time! It’s good to know others can identify with these feelings!

  2. Chris S.

    Jan 21, 2016 at 10:53 pm

    Great article! Really got me inspired and looking at things in a new way. thanks for the insight

  3. Chris S.

    Jan 21, 2016 at 9:50 pm

    Great article! This has given me a new sense of looking at things. Thanks for the inspiration and motivation to move forward with my goals. THANK YOU

  4. Ivy Shelden

    Jan 21, 2016 at 12:12 pm

    Thank you Chris, I am glad you enjoyed it! 🙂

  5. Chris Tom

    Jan 20, 2016 at 6:21 pm

    Very inspiring article..beautifully said..Thank you.

    • Ivy Shelden

      Jan 22, 2016 at 3:42 am

      You are very welcome and thanks for reading!

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Life

How To Be Happier And More Focused Using The Art Of Tidying Up: 34 Lessons From My Huge Tidy Up.

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Last week I spent two days throwing out more than 50% of my personal belongings.

What started this tidying up frenzy that caused me to throw out so much of my life’s possessions? It was a book that I read. In fact, I’ve read several books recently about why we should clean up our material possessions.

The results I experienced were phenomenal. By the end of this blog post, you’ll definitely want to do the same to replicate the results I got from this simple process.

Here are the 34 lessons from my huge tidy up which will inspire you to do the same:

 

1. Your mindset changes when you tidy up in one shot rather than bit by bit.

I’ve tried to tidy up for the last five years. It never fully happened. The reason was that I attempted to do this mammoth task in small chunks. As I tidied up one space or one category of belongings, I’d end up collecting more junk in the meantime.

“Seeing your home and workspace completely junk-free changes your mindset permanently”

I never want to go back to the old me because the tidy person I’ve now become is so much more organized, calm and in control. I now know what I value and what I don’t.

Once you’ve experienced this feeling, you’ll never go back. It’s only possible to get this feeling though by doing your big clean up in one shot without stopping.

Tidying up has changed my life and it can dramatically change yours too.

 

2. Discard first and organize second.

My huge tidy up followed the KonMari method. Basically, all you do is concentrate on discarding items that don’t bring you joy first and then the possessions you have left then need to be sorted. It doesn’t get any easier than that.

Every other tidying up method I’ve tried previously has resulted in one big chaotic event that I never fully completed. Try this method and I promise you it will work.

 

3. Tidying up sentimental items forces you to let go of the past.

The first part of my clean-up was discarding clothing. Once I got to the sentimental items – these items are best to do last because they’re the hardest – I found that discarding sentimental items helped me to deal with elements of my past which I’d previously ignored.

I had old business cards from failed businesses that still haunted me, cards from ex-girlfriends, sad possessions that belonged to dead relatives, belongings that were part of my old passions like Djing and Playing the drums, and even items that I’d held onto from past careers.

As I discarded with these items, I finalized past chapters of my life that weren’t fully closed. This made me feel completely free and it’s created space for the future.

“We all suffer from the past and having a big tidy up is a great way to deal with it and bring a newfound joy to your life”

 

4. The stuff you throw away has already fulfilled its purpose.

The items you throw away have taught you what you don’t love and the things you want to spend less time with. The items you throw away teach you what no longer inspires you and the hobbies you no longer want to engage with.

Every item you throw away has taught you something. Some possessions have already given you all the joy they have to give you and so their time in your life has passed. Other possessions have taught you a lesson and so now they can move on to somebody else’s life too.

Going through my possessions taught me how so many of the things I had held onto had already fulfilled their purpose. It’s like I was expecting these throwaway items to give me multiple miracle gifts rather than be happy and grateful for the ones they’d already given me.

“I learned that the possessions I cherished were invisible because of all the things I held onto which didn’t serve me”

Everything has an expiry date including you. Don’t hold onto stuff forever. Set yourself free.

 

5. Tidying requires two decisions.

Whether or not to dispose of something and where to put the things you keep. It’s really that simple. Don’t overcomplicate it any more than that.

 

6. Being perfectly tidy once is enough to create sustained momentum.

You’ll never go back to your old untidy ways once you’ve lived in a perfectly clean and clutter-free space. It’s addictive and I want all of you to witness this for yourselves.

 

7. Better storage is not the answer.

Just because something has been put away, it does not mean that the clutter has been removed. Buying convenient storage solutions makes you think your clutter has gone. It hasn’t. Tidying up allows you to see everything you own and that in itself is very valuable.

Hiding objects in magic lock away storage solutions results in you probably never actually using that item. I had lots of possessions stored in boxes and the reality is that I’ve never opened those boxes in the last ten years. Possessions that bring you joy should be easy to access so you can reap the benefits.

Possessions that no longer bring you joy should be discarded so that maybe someone else can get some use out of what you discard. Unfortunately, you can’t take your material possessions to the grave with you, so you need to learn to let go, and tidy up!

 

8. Tidying by location doesn’t work. Tidying by category does.

You need to be able to see everything you have of a particular item like clothes.

When I went through this process I realized I had batteries stored in every room, I had three torches, loose change everywhere and a mountain of computer cables that I was never going to use – and that looked very untidy.

Once you can do a proper stocktake of what you have, you’ll find the process of discarding much easier. This step is fundamental to the tidying up process being effective.

 

9. All tidying begins with this question.

Does this item bring me joy? It’s the only question you need to ask. If you keep what brings you joy, you’ll experience more joy in your life which is the ultimate goal I want all of you to achieve. Keeping only what sparks joy will help you to reset your life and begin a lifestyle that is phenomenal!

 

10. The second question is this: When did I last use this item?

The answer to this question when I did my big tidy up was typically more than five years ago. If you haven’t used something for the last twelve months, then there’s a very strong chance you never will. It’s time to make a decision and discard items in this category.

 

11. It’s not about getting rid of stuff; it’s about cherishing what you have.

The sense of gratitude I got from my doing this tidy up made me love the items I held onto even more. Tidying up allows us to see just how lucky we are and it reminds us that it’s not about the possessions we have so much, but the feeling we get from them and the memories our stuff gives us.

We all need more gratitude. Tidying up is a fantastic way to be more grateful.

 

12. Calculating the amount of a category to hold onto.

In the category of clothes as an example, you might be wondering how you know when you have enough clothes. The lesson here is to hold onto the clothes that you enjoy and discard everything else. The clothes that bring you joy will equal the right amount in the end.

I know that doesn’t sound tangible but it really works. Trust me on this.

 

13. Your possessions affect your self-image.

If you’re holding onto old t-shirts with holes in them so you can wear them to bed, you’ll make yourself feel unattractive when you go to sleep at night. I found during my clean up that I was holding onto clothes that no longer fitted or reminded me of the person I used to be, and using these clothes as pyjamas I could wear to bed.

I found I was going to bed with a poor self-image that reminded me of who I used to be. Even the clothes you wear affect how you feel and your confidence. Bottom-line is to ditch possessions that don’t bring you joy.

 

14. Touch items before you throw them away.

Interacting with your possessions before you decide how they make you feel helps make the decision for you. I found that by touching shirts in my wardrobe, the feeling of the material and how they looked up close made my decision-making process easier.

 

15. Ask yourself “What purpose does this item serve?

I held onto many miscellaneous items that I found were useless when I asked myself this question. Having a bag full of safety pins is great but if I haven’t used one for more than ten years, then there’s a good chance I never will.

I held onto boxes of batteries too yet I don’t own any devices that require replaceable batteries anymore. The purpose of what you have is important to consider. Don’t overthink it though. You’ll know pretty quickly if an item has a purpose in your life.

If there’s any doubt, get rid of the item.

 

16. Charitable throwing away is key to letting go.

Throwing things away feels really horrible if you know that an item won’t get further use. That’s why, where possible, I gave my possessions away to charity. You win and people that have nothing win as well. Charitable throwing away is reinforcing the gift of giving and helping you to declutter as well.

 

17. eBay and giving to friends doesn’t work.

Why? Because it takes time and gives you an excuse to hold onto things. The best thing you can do sometimes is take things to the recycling center because if you don’t, you’ll never get rid of them. It will always be this conversation in your head: “Someday, I’ll sell it on eBay.”

You have better things to do with your time than listing every unwanted item you have online or trying to give things to friends.

“Once you’ve gone through the art of tidying up and refocused your life, you’ll have so many possessions to get rid of that listing your items for sale online will simply take up too much time that could be spent on income producing activities that outweigh the pocket change you’ll get for your unwanted items”

Think of it this way: the things you are getting rid of have already given you your monies worth. This simple reframe in your mind will allow you to let go. It will allow you to forgive yourself for buying useless stuff that you no longer use.

The other thing I found is that it’s surprisingly hard to give things away to your friends and you begin to feel bad because you end up cluttering up their homes.

 

18. Unused possessions teach you that you didn’t need them after all.

Again, these possessions have fulfilled their purpose so you can now let them go.

 

19. Discarding teaches you your true passions.

If you throw something away and deeply regret it, then you learn what you’re truly passionate away. Even if you buy the same item again, you’ve learned an important lesson which is worth the cost of throwing away the original item.

 

20. Your decision-making skills get better.

You end up being able to make decisions better when you learn to let go of your unwanted possessions. Your possessions are a reflection of your life and where you’ve been. Tidying up helps you to be satisfied with where you’ve come from and who’ve you’ve become.

Being forced to make a decision that is final and that you can’t come back from, is strangely satisfying and it will show up in other areas of your life down the track.

 

21. The moment you first encounter a book is the right time to read it.

If you didn’t read it when you bought it, you probably never will. This means the lessons the book could have taught you were not meant for you. Books are one of the biggest uses of space and many need to be thrown away so that you can be left with the books you’ll actually get value from.

There’s no better feeling than being surrounded by only books that you love and make you smile.

 

22. The best way to deal with loose paper.

Throw them all away because you’ll probably never read them. If you really think you need a bit of paper, take a photo of it with your phone and then throw it away. Loose paper looks really messy and makes you feel disorganized.

 

23. All empty boxes must go!

I am the biggest offender when it comes to keeping empty boxes. I kept every empty box, from every purchase I made in the last five years. The result is a home full of empty boxes. The space these boxes take up could be used for other things like renting out your spare room on Airbnb or having a quiet room to study in.

The reason I held onto empty boxes was that I thought when I eventually sold some items, they’d be worth more with their original box. In most cases, no one pays more for an item because it comes with the original box worth $1.

It’s perfectly fine to sell an item without a box. Create space by throwing away boxes.

 

24. And now onto those spare buttons you store.

I had a whole box of spare buttons from clothing I purchased. Guess what? I can’t sew and never hold onto a piece of clothing once the button falls off. Clothes that have buttons fall off are generally passed their expiry date. Chuck them out and don’t look back.

You’ll never match the correct button to the right piece of clothing 90% of the time anyway.

 

25. Tidying up can cause sickness. It’s part of the process.

After all of my tidying up, I became very ill. Part of the reason was because of all the dust my old, unused items spread in my living spaces from lack of use, and being disturbed from their existing storage locations.

As well as that, the process of letting go of most of your possessions is exhausting and it’s hard work on the body. Tidying up is like one big storm which is followed by carnage (sickness) and then calm at the end once you know you’re organized for life.

 

26. Storage solutions hide items you dislike from sight. Avoid them, they’re the enemy.

You can walk into a shopping mall and find lots of storage solutions to help you supposedly be tidier. Storage solutions are a trap. Storage solutions hide your possessions in complex places that make it even harder to know what you actually own, therefore increasing the chance that you have multiple items that serve the same purpose.

 

27. Round objects take up more room.

If there’s a square or rectangle option for things like furniture and laundry baskets, go for that. Round objects take up more space. Period.

 

28. Buying in bulk costs more.

Retailers promote the benefits of buying in bulk. I disagree. Buying in bulk forces you to do the following:

– Buy more than you need
– It doesn’t account for your tastes changing over time which leaves you with leftovers
– Waste your precious mental space because of the excess clutter that occupies your brain
– Forget the cost of storage which is more than the discount of buying in bulk
– Distract you from your true creativity which is enhanced through empty space

“Our homes are not commercial warehouses that are to be used for storage of widgets”

This whole concept forces us to behave like factory workers. Our homes are to be lived in and are supposed to spark joy and help us to relax after a long day.

 

29. Tidying up shows us what we love.

After a massive clean-up, you’ll learn more about yourself and the things you value. During my clean-up, I learned that I love the simplicity of certain items. I learned that I also love the color of an item and that affects whether I’ll retain it for the long-term. Having learned this about myself, I’ll now be much more careful about the colors of objects I buy in the future.

 

30. You’ll learn about your weaknesses.

I learned that I have trouble letting go of the past and now I can work on this weakness going forward. Up until my big tidy up, I would never have believed this fact to be true.

 

31. Letting go is how you add new things into your life.

By cleaning out the junk that was occupying space in my life, I’ve now made room for new things. Maybe I’ll take up a new hobby or surround myself with new people. At least I have space now to do so and I’d love you to experience this feeling of freedom for yourself.

 

32. You’ll learn why you can’t throw something away.

It’s because of two reasons according to the book I read: an attachment to the past or a fear of the future. I held onto old gym diaries out of a fear that one day in the future I would need to look at them again if I decided to start the gym once more.

I also held onto cards from ex-girlfriends because I was nostalgic and didn’t want to let go of these old memories which deep down I had no desire to indulge in any longer.

 

33. Putting your home in order puts your mind in order.

Your mind is partly a reflection of the physical world. A messy home results in a messy mind that can’t think straight, make decisions or allow space for new ideas. Your possessions say so much about you and are a hidden contributor to your overall success in life.

It’s time to clean your house and remove some possessions.

 

34. The result is being surrounded by things that make you happy.

Now that I have gone through this mammoth task of tidying up everything I own and decluttering, I’m now left sitting here and evaluating the whole process. The result has been quite surprising. I find myself sitting here and looking around at only things that make me happy.

Everything I’ve held onto feels like it has a purpose. The possessions I have left make me feel happy and the objects in my life that produced negative emotions are now gone. I would never have predicted that tidying up could be so life-changing.

Try it for yourself and let me know how you go.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Life

2 Vital Keys to Having a True Breakthrough This Year

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Every person has a great deal of potential within them. However, the majority of people will never tap into that potential because something hinders them from getting it done whether that be a traumatic event that plagues their mind, or a negative mindset. This can be due to fear, insecurities, or of feelings of not deserving or not being good enough.

The list is literally endless because every person has different challenges in life. We are all different people, with different pasts, experiences, backgrounds, belief systems, but one commonality we all share: the pain of NOT DOING in our past.

If you’ve ever been to a conference for business, professional, or spiritual development, you know the feeling of getting fired up, motivated and inspired to go forward and DO! When you get home, the fire in your heart and mind is still burning. Nonetheless, this feeling tends to be short lived, as the reality of life sets in: bills, relationship problems, office issues, etc. and your fire begins to go out and you are back at square one… again.

There are some people that go to an event and then truly have a breakthrough in life. They explode in their business, family life, spiritual life, and health. The one thing that separates these people from the rest of us is their willingness to go deeper within themselves.

If you have attended an Anthony “Tony” Robbins motivational lecture, you know there are many reported success stories of people that he has inspired. Tony has stated in the past that individuals are able to “breakthrough” because they do not accept surface level BS; these successful people go deeper within themselves to determine the root cause of their issues or shortcomings. He also explained that by doing so, they would experience a true “breakthrough.”

If this year is going to truly be different for you, and you are going to see expansion and advancements in all parts of your life, you will need to go deeper.

Here are two important keys to help you have a breakthrough year:

1. Get Real With Yourself

Self-reflection is a powerful character building tool. However, when inspecting your life and who you are, you must go deep into this process. Don’t stay surface level and just think about what you need to improve on. Make the extra effort to think about the why of it all. Why are you weak in certain areas? Why do you seem to always fall short when doing certain tasks? Why do you dislike specific types of people and or places? Most importantly, why do you lack motivation in crucial aspects of your life?

When you start asking these types of profound questions and digging deeper, you are able to realize that there may be hidden reasons for your life constraints. Sometimes, pain in our past and heart-rending experiences of life are responsible for our weaknesses.

The challenge is to visit these places mentally and resolve root causes. Having these moments of reflection enables us to experience some very personal and self teachable moments. It is in these moments that true clarity will come and you will make decisions about where to go from here based on level headed logic rather than simply pure emotion.

Getting to know yourself better will help you in your personal and professional growth and help you to fast-track the breakthrough you desire.

“Self awareness is the ability to take an honest look at your life without any attachment to it being right or wrong, good or bad.” – Debbie Ford

2. Get Real with Others

Knowing yourself is vital, but knowing the people and the environment around you is also crucial. We’ve all heard the old saying, “hang around dogs with fleas and you’ll soon have fleas as well.” If you’re going to breakthrough this year, you better get to doing not only some self-reflection but also some social-reflection. Look around yourself and find out who and what is having a positive or negative impact on your life.

Are you exposed to people who are constantly complaining, talking bad about others, criticizing people, belittling others, and just outright being negative? If so, their negative viewpoints need to be either dismissed in your mind, and/or you should minimize the amount of time and attention that they take from you.

Tasks, habits, and extracurricular activities which provide no greater value for you should be reconsidered. Not that you shouldn’t have some down time and moments to recharge, but be careful about scrolling social media aimlessly and indulging in online window shopping. Such activities are not adding to your expansion or ascension up to the next level of life; rather they are wasting your time.

We have a total of 100% energy to give per day (a cellphone example). Just like the apps we have running in the background, they tend to drain us of our energy. Everything we take part in requires some percentage of energy investment from us. You must choose to dedicate energy to things and people that are part of your solution in helping you move the needle towards your goals. One simple question to ask yourself, and that all true leaders must ask themselves is: Does THIS propel me closer TOWARDS my goal or AWAY from it?

“Surround yourself with people who are only going to lift you higher.” – Oprah Winfrey

So, get real with the situation at hand: you either want to have a breakthrough year or you don’t. If you do, you should size-up your expectations, and key on these two important areas of your life: who you are on the inside, and the people and things around you that impact who you are.

What are you going to do this year to make sure you have the best year of your life! Comment below and share your goals.

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Life

5 Steps to Help You Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs & Live Your Most Powerful Life

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When it comes to finding success in life our limiting beliefs can be one of the biggest trip-ups we face. They wall us in and continually place a ceiling on our potential. What’s more, as success begins to evade us because of these limited thoughts, we unknowingly strengthen them. It’s as if they look back at us to say, “I told you so.” In this manner, limiting beliefs are self-reinforcing.

They grow stronger and we feel weaker and less empowered to find success. It’s understandable that if they go unchecked for too long we can begin to feel deep frustration and hopelessness which can eventually lead to anger, self-hatred, and even depression.But it is possible to put our limiting beliefs in-check and find the freedom to pursue our purpose and maximize our potential.

If you’re ready to overcome your limiting beliefs and live your most powerful life, try these five steps:

1. Identify Your Limiting Beliefs

The first step to rectifying any situation is to get a clear handle on what’s wrong. It’s no different here. To overcome your limiting beliefs you first need to shine a spotlight on them. Most of your limiting beliefs will be relatively easy to identify. They should be—these are the types of beliefs you regularly beat yourself up over, after all.

But once you have your limiting beliefs identified make sure to write them down. There is something about “seeing” our problems in a tangible way that empowers us to better respond to them. In some cases, they begin to immediately lose their effectiveness over us just because we can see them for the illusions they are.

“You begin to fly when you let go of self-limiting beliefs and allow your mind and aspirations to rise to greater heights.” ―Brian Tracy

2. Acknowledge Them

Having the ability to view our limits helps us advance to the next step, acknowledgment. In this phase, we don’t just see our limiting beliefs in simple black-and-white—we acknowledge them for what they are, the harm they have done, and admit that we have taken part in their creation.

It’s almost as if we can have a dialog with them. By doing so we open the lines of communication and, as we all know, communication is crucial for any breakthrough. This step helps us understand our limiting beliefs better allowing us a clearer path moving forward.

It is also an especially critical step because by acknowledging our responsibility, we empower ourselves to change. No one ever gains victory over problems without taking responsibility for having them or for doing the work to resolve them.

3. Confront The Beliefs

We can only conquer our limiting beliefs by confronting them. The reason they grow so troublesome for us in the first place is simply that they go unchallenged. We often “assume” them without question.

Rather than deal with the struggle of this confrontation we develop an almost co-dependent relationship with them. We guard our limiting beliefs and justify them if they are ever questioned. But our beliefs will continue to grow and strengthen unless we challenge them.

If this is a difficult process for you to do by yourself, a counselor or coach can be helpful. If not with a professional, then at least let your beliefs be open to scrutiny by a trusted friend or significant other.

With your written list, work through as many reasons to call B.S. as you can think of. Write them out and present your argument. This doesn’t have to be a quick process, take as much time as necessary to make your case. Especially with the help of another person, you will begin to see all of the ways in which your beliefs aren’t true and find all of the reasons you need to believe you can succeed.

4. Replace Them With Unlimited Beliefs

To move forward effectively, you can’t just drop your limiting beliefs and get back to life as usual. In order to reach your most powerful life, you’ve got replace the old, limiting beliefs with new, empowering ones.

If one of your limiting beliefs was, “I don’t deserve success because of xyz,” you need to replace it with, “I do deserve success because of abc,” and then list out all the reasons why.

It’s such a simple step but so many people neglect it. They’re just so happy to be rid of their old limiting beliefs, I guess. But what good is it to just be neutral? You’ve got to create an upgrade for every belief you just tore down. You’ve got to replace the limited ones with unlimited.

On that list, you created earlier, or on a new page if you’ve run out of room, write out your empowering, replacement beliefs. Keep going until each one is now optimized with a belief that removes those old limits you placed on yourself.

“Do the uncomfortable. Become comfortable with these acts. Prove to yourself that your limiting beliefs die a quick death if you will simply do what you feel uncomfortable doing.” ―Darren Rowse

5. Use Your New Beliefs To Find Success

You’ve got just one more step to go and that is to implement your new beliefs. Put your full faith in them as if they will succeed because they will. Use your fresh, new enthusiasm to push you through to success in areas where you only saw limitation before.

You will not fail because when we truly believe we are capable of success that is what we achieve. Be encouraged—every new success you have will only strengthen your beliefs. Congratulations, you are now on your way to living your most powerful life!

What are you doing today to make the most of your life? Comment below!

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Life

3 Purchases Of $100 Or Less That Have Changed My Life.

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A popular question made famous by a certain 4-Hour Work Week author has been doing the rounds a lot lately. It’s an incredibly powerful question and I want to share with you my answer.

By the way, my answer is not some cheap product placement or a dodgy infomercial in case you were wondering.

3 purchases of $100 or Less that changed my life are:

 

Purchase #1 A meditation app.

The app called Calm to be more specific. It won Apple’s App Of The Year and it’s helped me chill the F out after tackling every fear I have. We all need to get out of our head more.

 

Purchase #2 A wireless computer keyboard.

Buy a wireless keyboard and use it with your laptop, tablet or phone wherever you are. Every day, aim to write one thing that inspires someone else. Post your written words on a blog (ideally someone else’s who has a large audience).

While you’re at work during the day, observe your surroundings as they are. Single out the positive things you see and share them online for all of us to see. When you type those words on your little wireless keyboard, pour every ounce of emotion you have into them.

Wake up one night, write something inspiring, and feel the tears drip from your eyes as you make yourself emotional because you know you’ve given it everything you’ve got. Know that every word you write for someone else is how you can give back to the world.

You can’t sit at home on your computer all day long and play games, watch porn and scroll your social media like a hamster going around and around on its wheel. Your keyboard is how you take the problems of our society and do something about them.

Know that the words you type will be most valuable when they are positive and instructive. There’s enough negativity in the world and your little wireless keyboard gives you the chance to do something about that injustice.

Wake up early in the morning (5 am) and make it a habit of writing something. “How To’s” work best. As you continue this habit, be vulnerable. Tell stories with your little wireless keyboard and share your biggest fears. Make your words human because that’s what you are after all.

Tell everybody how you had your heart broken, suffered mental health issues, lost someone you love, battled a health issue – these situations and what you’ve learned will help others the most.

Everything you’ve experienced to this day has brought you to these words you type to inspire others. Write about what makes you happy and fuse your passion together with your words.

Know that you’ll get emails after you type these words for at least a year, from people who have benefited from your writing. Reply to these emails and help where you can. Know that one day you’ll get an email from a reader that will cause you to break down and get emotional.

This email you eventually get will be the trigger for you to stop and evaluate what you’re typing these words for. When that moment comes, you’ll pick up your wireless keyboard again and continue writing because you’ll know you’re helping people. These words are actually making you fulfilled.

Along the way, as your readers increase, you’ll come across the evil species we call trolls and some critics too. The words that these people type on their wireless keyboards will hurt you at first and take you by surprise. You’ll eventually realize that everyone faces these same demons.

It’s not you; it’s them. Don’t let these haters stop you from writing words on your little wireless keyboard and keep pouring your heart out.

Your big viral moment thanks to your wireless keyboard will come at some stage. Don’t let this moment sidetrack you from the reason why you bought this wireless keyboard and started typing. Your newfound celebrity status will encourage your big fat ego, and that will take away all of the good your words have done.

Now that your life has been changed forever by your little wireless keyboard, keep going. You can change the world with your keyboard if you keep going and never give up your habit. Typing these words daily is the best kind of therapy there is for the troubles and challenges this life will throw at you.

One day, you’ll know what it’s like to be a leader, creator and inspiration for others thanks to your little wireless keyboard. Until then, keep typing those words. Your words matter and they can inspire others, and change the world at the same time.

 

Purchase #3 A pair of kid’s soccer boots for $79.95

This purchase works best when given to a kid that comes from a broken home and it will show them that strangers care. When the mother comes over and thanks you with tears in her eyes, you’ll understand the power of kindness. This will change your life.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Success Advice

I’ll Tell You How To Be Confident Without The Self-Help BS: You Just Do It.

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One of the most popular topics on blogs right now is content about how to have more confidence. It’s driving me bonkers! I’m unsure what the fascination is with the subject.

Having gone through the whole confidence battle myself and come out the other side on top, I think I can share a few things that will help everybody.

 

Act as if.

Rather than be caught up in the foreplay of overthinking, considering and asking too many questions, just do.

“Quite simply, what has worked for me is to just get on with the task and tell myself I’m becoming an expert while being in motion”

Getting going is the part we’re all missing when it comes to confidence. You can’t be confident unless you get some experience at whatever you want to be confident at. This advice sounds simplistic because it is.

I’ve become more confident over the last five years by running up miles in the beaten-up VW Beetle that was my mind and body. Through gaining experience, I turned that VW Beetle into a Lamborghini by trying things and executing.

There’s no pretending when it comes to confidence. You only start to believe you are confident when you begin taking action. I could probably wrap it up right there and you’d be done when it comes to confidence. No more self-help secrets and private masterminds are required.

Act as if you are already confident and your mind will believe you. Your mind only believes what you tell it. Tell your mind you are confident and you will gain more confidence in the execution. That extraordinary mind will then do as you tell it.

 

Sit up and stand up straight soldier!

I always believed this one was total hocus pocus or maybe even a Jedi Mind Trick. It’s not. Confidence is also in the way you move. People feel confidence in you through your presence. If you need to perform at 110% in say a speech as an example, you have to stand up straight and physically be confident.

Now this is harder than it looks so here’s what I did: I stood on the stage with my back straight. I then rolled my shoulders back and poked my chest out slightly. Each movement on stage was acted out as if I was Arnold Schwarzenegger posing for the Mr Olympia Final (that’s hard as I look nothing like him but stay with me peeps).

Simply having a confident physical presence allowed the audience to be confident with the words and advice I was delivering. Even if each point I presented was not completely thought through, the effect was still the same. I came across as confident.

So, next time you want to be confident, try this out for yourself. Pick your own hero who’s oozing confidence, to be the person you imagine when you go into your confident pose. No matter how ridiculous this seems, it works. Don’t question, just do.

 

Self-talk is key: three words to confidence.

Okay, let’s not overdo this confidence lesson. The self-talk in my head when I need to be confident is very dumb and easy to copy. The three words I use are:

“You got this!”

Say those three words whenever you need to be confident. Say them over and over until they drown out your negative inner voice that wants to doubt your ability.

“Doubt is the disease that sabotages your confidence”

I had no idea about blogging as an example. I just believed I’d find a way and I did. My doubting brain told me that I was hopeless at English and couldn’t master grammar to save my life. That aside, I just used these three words to silence the inner critic.

Your inner critic is only right if you let it be. Back yourself. Talk to yourself like a winner (not a loser) and you’ll have more confidence. No need to buy that book on confidence anymore. No need to read another self-help, pump up blog post that gets you all warm and sweaty.

 

Disconnect from the outcome.

Confidence is about putting the outcome aside. Everything you do is a lesson and will give you confidence. Being tied to the idea of what the outcome looks like allows your doubting mind and your inner critic to come back to the main stage of your attention.

Where your energy flows to, is where your focus goes. Focusing on anything other than being confident about your daily battles will give you the results you hate. Nine times out of ten you can’t control the outcome anyway.

So focusing on doing your best and being confident will take you so much further. Like I keep saying “You got this!”

Swag it out like whatever outcome you achieve is phenomenal because you are incredible for waking up each day and just giving it a crack!

 

Say yes and learn later.

Confidence comes from saying yes and deciding to figure out the strategy later. If an offer or idea resonates with you, then say yes. You’ll find yourself gaining more experience by doing so. My superman complex used to make me carefully think about each offer I was presented with to assess whether I had the skills and capability.

Now I choose offers and proposals that bring me joy instead, and I use my newfound confidence to say yes, and know that I’ll learn what I need to execute properly along the way. Failing that, there’s someone I know in my network that can fill any blanks in regardless so I’m very unlikely to fail.

BUT even if I fail it’s all good because I still learned heaps, got experience and had fun in the meantime. All of which made me more confident. Confidence is unstoppable when it starts to compound through experience and taking action.

 

Remember that all of us have no idea including me.

This was something I learned through a podcast. If you look at your heroes and get to know them as friends, you’ll quickly realize, like I did with my own heroes, that they have no idea. Your heroes just act as if and see what sticks.

When approaching any goal with this in mind, you find an inner confidence to have a go and see what happens.

“When you realize we’re all flawed, it sets you free to try stuff and execute on a few wild goals that you may not succeed at”

I have no clue about most things and that’s where the beauty lies. Stop idolizing and be confident in your ability to get sh*t done.

 

We’re all extraordinary when we believe we are.

Belief in yourself is key to having confidence. The truth is that all of us can be extraordinary no matter where we come from, our nationality, the struggles we’ve gone through, what books we’ve read or who our current friends are.

The opportunity to be extraordinary exists for all of us. Let this very idea give you the confidence you need to change the world because you can.

You don’t need more self-help articles on confidence: You need to understand you’re already extraordinary.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared hundreds of thousands of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around success, personal development, motivation, and entrepreneurship. During the day Tim works with the most iconic tech companies in the world, as an adviser, to assist them in expanding into Australia. By night, Tim coaches his students on the principles of personal development and the fundamentals of entrepreneurship. You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net or through his Facebook.

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7 Comments

7 Comments

  1. Teresa

    Jan 29, 2016 at 1:36 pm

    Thanks for writing this article, you give a fresh, new perspective to the “jealousy” issue. Thank you.

    • Ivy Shelden

      Feb 1, 2016 at 3:08 pm

      You are welcome Teresa, I know it’s something we all struggle with from time to time! It’s good to know others can identify with these feelings!

  2. Chris S.

    Jan 21, 2016 at 10:53 pm

    Great article! Really got me inspired and looking at things in a new way. thanks for the insight

  3. Chris S.

    Jan 21, 2016 at 9:50 pm

    Great article! This has given me a new sense of looking at things. Thanks for the inspiration and motivation to move forward with my goals. THANK YOU

  4. Ivy Shelden

    Jan 21, 2016 at 12:12 pm

    Thank you Chris, I am glad you enjoyed it! 🙂

  5. Chris Tom

    Jan 20, 2016 at 6:21 pm

    Very inspiring article..beautifully said..Thank you.

    • Ivy Shelden

      Jan 22, 2016 at 3:42 am

      You are very welcome and thanks for reading!

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Life

How To Be Happier And More Focused Using The Art Of Tidying Up: 34 Lessons From My Huge Tidy Up.

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Last week I spent two days throwing out more than 50% of my personal belongings.

What started this tidying up frenzy that caused me to throw out so much of my life’s possessions? It was a book that I read. In fact, I’ve read several books recently about why we should clean up our material possessions.

The results I experienced were phenomenal. By the end of this blog post, you’ll definitely want to do the same to replicate the results I got from this simple process.

Here are the 34 lessons from my huge tidy up which will inspire you to do the same:

 

1. Your mindset changes when you tidy up in one shot rather than bit by bit.

I’ve tried to tidy up for the last five years. It never fully happened. The reason was that I attempted to do this mammoth task in small chunks. As I tidied up one space or one category of belongings, I’d end up collecting more junk in the meantime.

“Seeing your home and workspace completely junk-free changes your mindset permanently”

I never want to go back to the old me because the tidy person I’ve now become is so much more organized, calm and in control. I now know what I value and what I don’t.

Once you’ve experienced this feeling, you’ll never go back. It’s only possible to get this feeling though by doing your big clean up in one shot without stopping.

Tidying up has changed my life and it can dramatically change yours too.

 

2. Discard first and organize second.

My huge tidy up followed the KonMari method. Basically, all you do is concentrate on discarding items that don’t bring you joy first and then the possessions you have left then need to be sorted. It doesn’t get any easier than that.

Every other tidying up method I’ve tried previously has resulted in one big chaotic event that I never fully completed. Try this method and I promise you it will work.

 

3. Tidying up sentimental items forces you to let go of the past.

The first part of my clean-up was discarding clothing. Once I got to the sentimental items – these items are best to do last because they’re the hardest – I found that discarding sentimental items helped me to deal with elements of my past which I’d previously ignored.

I had old business cards from failed businesses that still haunted me, cards from ex-girlfriends, sad possessions that belonged to dead relatives, belongings that were part of my old passions like Djing and Playing the drums, and even items that I’d held onto from past careers.

As I discarded with these items, I finalized past chapters of my life that weren’t fully closed. This made me feel completely free and it’s created space for the future.

“We all suffer from the past and having a big tidy up is a great way to deal with it and bring a newfound joy to your life”

 

4. The stuff you throw away has already fulfilled its purpose.

The items you throw away have taught you what you don’t love and the things you want to spend less time with. The items you throw away teach you what no longer inspires you and the hobbies you no longer want to engage with.

Every item you throw away has taught you something. Some possessions have already given you all the joy they have to give you and so their time in your life has passed. Other possessions have taught you a lesson and so now they can move on to somebody else’s life too.

Going through my possessions taught me how so many of the things I had held onto had already fulfilled their purpose. It’s like I was expecting these throwaway items to give me multiple miracle gifts rather than be happy and grateful for the ones they’d already given me.

“I learned that the possessions I cherished were invisible because of all the things I held onto which didn’t serve me”

Everything has an expiry date including you. Don’t hold onto stuff forever. Set yourself free.

 

5. Tidying requires two decisions.

Whether or not to dispose of something and where to put the things you keep. It’s really that simple. Don’t overcomplicate it any more than that.

 

6. Being perfectly tidy once is enough to create sustained momentum.

You’ll never go back to your old untidy ways once you’ve lived in a perfectly clean and clutter-free space. It’s addictive and I want all of you to witness this for yourselves.

 

7. Better storage is not the answer.

Just because something has been put away, it does not mean that the clutter has been removed. Buying convenient storage solutions makes you think your clutter has gone. It hasn’t. Tidying up allows you to see everything you own and that in itself is very valuable.

Hiding objects in magic lock away storage solutions results in you probably never actually using that item. I had lots of possessions stored in boxes and the reality is that I’ve never opened those boxes in the last ten years. Possessions that bring you joy should be easy to access so you can reap the benefits.

Possessions that no longer bring you joy should be discarded so that maybe someone else can get some use out of what you discard. Unfortunately, you can’t take your material possessions to the grave with you, so you need to learn to let go, and tidy up!

 

8. Tidying by location doesn’t work. Tidying by category does.

You need to be able to see everything you have of a particular item like clothes.

When I went through this process I realized I had batteries stored in every room, I had three torches, loose change everywhere and a mountain of computer cables that I was never going to use – and that looked very untidy.

Once you can do a proper stocktake of what you have, you’ll find the process of discarding much easier. This step is fundamental to the tidying up process being effective.

 

9. All tidying begins with this question.

Does this item bring me joy? It’s the only question you need to ask. If you keep what brings you joy, you’ll experience more joy in your life which is the ultimate goal I want all of you to achieve. Keeping only what sparks joy will help you to reset your life and begin a lifestyle that is phenomenal!

 

10. The second question is this: When did I last use this item?

The answer to this question when I did my big tidy up was typically more than five years ago. If you haven’t used something for the last twelve months, then there’s a very strong chance you never will. It’s time to make a decision and discard items in this category.

 

11. It’s not about getting rid of stuff; it’s about cherishing what you have.

The sense of gratitude I got from my doing this tidy up made me love the items I held onto even more. Tidying up allows us to see just how lucky we are and it reminds us that it’s not about the possessions we have so much, but the feeling we get from them and the memories our stuff gives us.

We all need more gratitude. Tidying up is a fantastic way to be more grateful.

 

12. Calculating the amount of a category to hold onto.

In the category of clothes as an example, you might be wondering how you know when you have enough clothes. The lesson here is to hold onto the clothes that you enjoy and discard everything else. The clothes that bring you joy will equal the right amount in the end.

I know that doesn’t sound tangible but it really works. Trust me on this.

 

13. Your possessions affect your self-image.

If you’re holding onto old t-shirts with holes in them so you can wear them to bed, you’ll make yourself feel unattractive when you go to sleep at night. I found during my clean up that I was holding onto clothes that no longer fitted or reminded me of the person I used to be, and using these clothes as pyjamas I could wear to bed.

I found I was going to bed with a poor self-image that reminded me of who I used to be. Even the clothes you wear affect how you feel and your confidence. Bottom-line is to ditch possessions that don’t bring you joy.

 

14. Touch items before you throw them away.

Interacting with your possessions before you decide how they make you feel helps make the decision for you. I found that by touching shirts in my wardrobe, the feeling of the material and how they looked up close made my decision-making process easier.

 

15. Ask yourself “What purpose does this item serve?

I held onto many miscellaneous items that I found were useless when I asked myself this question. Having a bag full of safety pins is great but if I haven’t used one for more than ten years, then there’s a good chance I never will.

I held onto boxes of batteries too yet I don’t own any devices that require replaceable batteries anymore. The purpose of what you have is important to consider. Don’t overthink it though. You’ll know pretty quickly if an item has a purpose in your life.

If there’s any doubt, get rid of the item.

 

16. Charitable throwing away is key to letting go.

Throwing things away feels really horrible if you know that an item won’t get further use. That’s why, where possible, I gave my possessions away to charity. You win and people that have nothing win as well. Charitable throwing away is reinforcing the gift of giving and helping you to declutter as well.

 

17. eBay and giving to friends doesn’t work.

Why? Because it takes time and gives you an excuse to hold onto things. The best thing you can do sometimes is take things to the recycling center because if you don’t, you’ll never get rid of them. It will always be this conversation in your head: “Someday, I’ll sell it on eBay.”

You have better things to do with your time than listing every unwanted item you have online or trying to give things to friends.

“Once you’ve gone through the art of tidying up and refocused your life, you’ll have so many possessions to get rid of that listing your items for sale online will simply take up too much time that could be spent on income producing activities that outweigh the pocket change you’ll get for your unwanted items”

Think of it this way: the things you are getting rid of have already given you your monies worth. This simple reframe in your mind will allow you to let go. It will allow you to forgive yourself for buying useless stuff that you no longer use.

The other thing I found is that it’s surprisingly hard to give things away to your friends and you begin to feel bad because you end up cluttering up their homes.

 

18. Unused possessions teach you that you didn’t need them after all.

Again, these possessions have fulfilled their purpose so you can now let them go.

 

19. Discarding teaches you your true passions.

If you throw something away and deeply regret it, then you learn what you’re truly passionate away. Even if you buy the same item again, you’ve learned an important lesson which is worth the cost of throwing away the original item.

 

20. Your decision-making skills get better.

You end up being able to make decisions better when you learn to let go of your unwanted possessions. Your possessions are a reflection of your life and where you’ve been. Tidying up helps you to be satisfied with where you’ve come from and who’ve you’ve become.

Being forced to make a decision that is final and that you can’t come back from, is strangely satisfying and it will show up in other areas of your life down the track.

 

21. The moment you first encounter a book is the right time to read it.

If you didn’t read it when you bought it, you probably never will. This means the lessons the book could have taught you were not meant for you. Books are one of the biggest uses of space and many need to be thrown away so that you can be left with the books you’ll actually get value from.

There’s no better feeling than being surrounded by only books that you love and make you smile.

 

22. The best way to deal with loose paper.

Throw them all away because you’ll probably never read them. If you really think you need a bit of paper, take a photo of it with your phone and then throw it away. Loose paper looks really messy and makes you feel disorganized.

 

23. All empty boxes must go!

I am the biggest offender when it comes to keeping empty boxes. I kept every empty box, from every purchase I made in the last five years. The result is a home full of empty boxes. The space these boxes take up could be used for other things like renting out your spare room on Airbnb or having a quiet room to study in.

The reason I held onto empty boxes was that I thought when I eventually sold some items, they’d be worth more with their original box. In most cases, no one pays more for an item because it comes with the original box worth $1.

It’s perfectly fine to sell an item without a box. Create space by throwing away boxes.

 

24. And now onto those spare buttons you store.

I had a whole box of spare buttons from clothing I purchased. Guess what? I can’t sew and never hold onto a piece of clothing once the button falls off. Clothes that have buttons fall off are generally passed their expiry date. Chuck them out and don’t look back.

You’ll never match the correct button to the right piece of clothing 90% of the time anyway.

 

25. Tidying up can cause sickness. It’s part of the process.

After all of my tidying up, I became very ill. Part of the reason was because of all the dust my old, unused items spread in my living spaces from lack of use, and being disturbed from their existing storage locations.

As well as that, the process of letting go of most of your possessions is exhausting and it’s hard work on the body. Tidying up is like one big storm which is followed by carnage (sickness) and then calm at the end once you know you’re organized for life.

 

26. Storage solutions hide items you dislike from sight. Avoid them, they’re the enemy.

You can walk into a shopping mall and find lots of storage solutions to help you supposedly be tidier. Storage solutions are a trap. Storage solutions hide your possessions in complex places that make it even harder to know what you actually own, therefore increasing the chance that you have multiple items that serve the same purpose.

 

27. Round objects take up more room.

If there’s a square or rectangle option for things like furniture and laundry baskets, go for that. Round objects take up more space. Period.

 

28. Buying in bulk costs more.

Retailers promote the benefits of buying in bulk. I disagree. Buying in bulk forces you to do the following:

– Buy more than you need
– It doesn’t account for your tastes changing over time which leaves you with leftovers
– Waste your precious mental space because of the excess clutter that occupies your brain
– Forget the cost of storage which is more than the discount of buying in bulk
– Distract you from your true creativity which is enhanced through empty space

“Our homes are not commercial warehouses that are to be used for storage of widgets”

This whole concept forces us to behave like factory workers. Our homes are to be lived in and are supposed to spark joy and help us to relax after a long day.

 

29. Tidying up shows us what we love.

After a massive clean-up, you’ll learn more about yourself and the things you value. During my clean-up, I learned that I love the simplicity of certain items. I learned that I also love the color of an item and that affects whether I’ll retain it for the long-term. Having learned this about myself, I’ll now be much more careful about the colors of objects I buy in the future.

 

30. You’ll learn about your weaknesses.

I learned that I have trouble letting go of the past and now I can work on this weakness going forward. Up until my big tidy up, I would never have believed this fact to be true.

 

31. Letting go is how you add new things into your life.

By cleaning out the junk that was occupying space in my life, I’ve now made room for new things. Maybe I’ll take up a new hobby or surround myself with new people. At least I have space now to do so and I’d love you to experience this feeling of freedom for yourself.

 

32. You’ll learn why you can’t throw something away.

It’s because of two reasons according to the book I read: an attachment to the past or a fear of the future. I held onto old gym diaries out of a fear that one day in the future I would need to look at them again if I decided to start the gym once more.

I also held onto cards from ex-girlfriends because I was nostalgic and didn’t want to let go of these old memories which deep down I had no desire to indulge in any longer.

 

33. Putting your home in order puts your mind in order.

Your mind is partly a reflection of the physical world. A messy home results in a messy mind that can’t think straight, make decisions or allow space for new ideas. Your possessions say so much about you and are a hidden contributor to your overall success in life.

It’s time to clean your house and remove some possessions.

 

34. The result is being surrounded by things that make you happy.

Now that I have gone through this mammoth task of tidying up everything I own and decluttering, I’m now left sitting here and evaluating the whole process. The result has been quite surprising. I find myself sitting here and looking around at only things that make me happy.

Everything I’ve held onto feels like it has a purpose. The possessions I have left make me feel happy and the objects in my life that produced negative emotions are now gone. I would never have predicted that tidying up could be so life-changing.

Try it for yourself and let me know how you go.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Life

2 Vital Keys to Having a True Breakthrough This Year

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breakthrough

Every person has a great deal of potential within them. However, the majority of people will never tap into that potential because something hinders them from getting it done whether that be a traumatic event that plagues their mind, or a negative mindset. This can be due to fear, insecurities, or of feelings of not deserving or not being good enough.

The list is literally endless because every person has different challenges in life. We are all different people, with different pasts, experiences, backgrounds, belief systems, but one commonality we all share: the pain of NOT DOING in our past.

If you’ve ever been to a conference for business, professional, or spiritual development, you know the feeling of getting fired up, motivated and inspired to go forward and DO! When you get home, the fire in your heart and mind is still burning. Nonetheless, this feeling tends to be short lived, as the reality of life sets in: bills, relationship problems, office issues, etc. and your fire begins to go out and you are back at square one… again.

There are some people that go to an event and then truly have a breakthrough in life. They explode in their business, family life, spiritual life, and health. The one thing that separates these people from the rest of us is their willingness to go deeper within themselves.

If you have attended an Anthony “Tony” Robbins motivational lecture, you know there are many reported success stories of people that he has inspired. Tony has stated in the past that individuals are able to “breakthrough” because they do not accept surface level BS; these successful people go deeper within themselves to determine the root cause of their issues or shortcomings. He also explained that by doing so, they would experience a true “breakthrough.”

If this year is going to truly be different for you, and you are going to see expansion and advancements in all parts of your life, you will need to go deeper.

Here are two important keys to help you have a breakthrough year:

1. Get Real With Yourself

Self-reflection is a powerful character building tool. However, when inspecting your life and who you are, you must go deep into this process. Don’t stay surface level and just think about what you need to improve on. Make the extra effort to think about the why of it all. Why are you weak in certain areas? Why do you seem to always fall short when doing certain tasks? Why do you dislike specific types of people and or places? Most importantly, why do you lack motivation in crucial aspects of your life?

When you start asking these types of profound questions and digging deeper, you are able to realize that there may be hidden reasons for your life constraints. Sometimes, pain in our past and heart-rending experiences of life are responsible for our weaknesses.

The challenge is to visit these places mentally and resolve root causes. Having these moments of reflection enables us to experience some very personal and self teachable moments. It is in these moments that true clarity will come and you will make decisions about where to go from here based on level headed logic rather than simply pure emotion.

Getting to know yourself better will help you in your personal and professional growth and help you to fast-track the breakthrough you desire.

“Self awareness is the ability to take an honest look at your life without any attachment to it being right or wrong, good or bad.” – Debbie Ford

2. Get Real with Others

Knowing yourself is vital, but knowing the people and the environment around you is also crucial. We’ve all heard the old saying, “hang around dogs with fleas and you’ll soon have fleas as well.” If you’re going to breakthrough this year, you better get to doing not only some self-reflection but also some social-reflection. Look around yourself and find out who and what is having a positive or negative impact on your life.

Are you exposed to people who are constantly complaining, talking bad about others, criticizing people, belittling others, and just outright being negative? If so, their negative viewpoints need to be either dismissed in your mind, and/or you should minimize the amount of time and attention that they take from you.

Tasks, habits, and extracurricular activities which provide no greater value for you should be reconsidered. Not that you shouldn’t have some down time and moments to recharge, but be careful about scrolling social media aimlessly and indulging in online window shopping. Such activities are not adding to your expansion or ascension up to the next level of life; rather they are wasting your time.

We have a total of 100% energy to give per day (a cellphone example). Just like the apps we have running in the background, they tend to drain us of our energy. Everything we take part in requires some percentage of energy investment from us. You must choose to dedicate energy to things and people that are part of your solution in helping you move the needle towards your goals. One simple question to ask yourself, and that all true leaders must ask themselves is: Does THIS propel me closer TOWARDS my goal or AWAY from it?

“Surround yourself with people who are only going to lift you higher.” – Oprah Winfrey

So, get real with the situation at hand: you either want to have a breakthrough year or you don’t. If you do, you should size-up your expectations, and key on these two important areas of your life: who you are on the inside, and the people and things around you that impact who you are.

What are you going to do this year to make sure you have the best year of your life! Comment below and share your goals.

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Life

5 Steps to Help You Overcome Your Limiting Beliefs & Live Your Most Powerful Life

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overcoming limiting beliefs

When it comes to finding success in life our limiting beliefs can be one of the biggest trip-ups we face. They wall us in and continually place a ceiling on our potential. What’s more, as success begins to evade us because of these limited thoughts, we unknowingly strengthen them. It’s as if they look back at us to say, “I told you so.” In this manner, limiting beliefs are self-reinforcing.

They grow stronger and we feel weaker and less empowered to find success. It’s understandable that if they go unchecked for too long we can begin to feel deep frustration and hopelessness which can eventually lead to anger, self-hatred, and even depression.But it is possible to put our limiting beliefs in-check and find the freedom to pursue our purpose and maximize our potential.

If you’re ready to overcome your limiting beliefs and live your most powerful life, try these five steps:

1. Identify Your Limiting Beliefs

The first step to rectifying any situation is to get a clear handle on what’s wrong. It’s no different here. To overcome your limiting beliefs you first need to shine a spotlight on them. Most of your limiting beliefs will be relatively easy to identify. They should be—these are the types of beliefs you regularly beat yourself up over, after all.

But once you have your limiting beliefs identified make sure to write them down. There is something about “seeing” our problems in a tangible way that empowers us to better respond to them. In some cases, they begin to immediately lose their effectiveness over us just because we can see them for the illusions they are.

“You begin to fly when you let go of self-limiting beliefs and allow your mind and aspirations to rise to greater heights.” ―Brian Tracy

2. Acknowledge Them

Having the ability to view our limits helps us advance to the next step, acknowledgment. In this phase, we don’t just see our limiting beliefs in simple black-and-white—we acknowledge them for what they are, the harm they have done, and admit that we have taken part in their creation.

It’s almost as if we can have a dialog with them. By doing so we open the lines of communication and, as we all know, communication is crucial for any breakthrough. This step helps us understand our limiting beliefs better allowing us a clearer path moving forward.

It is also an especially critical step because by acknowledging our responsibility, we empower ourselves to change. No one ever gains victory over problems without taking responsibility for having them or for doing the work to resolve them.

3. Confront The Beliefs

We can only conquer our limiting beliefs by confronting them. The reason they grow so troublesome for us in the first place is simply that they go unchallenged. We often “assume” them without question.

Rather than deal with the struggle of this confrontation we develop an almost co-dependent relationship with them. We guard our limiting beliefs and justify them if they are ever questioned. But our beliefs will continue to grow and strengthen unless we challenge them.

If this is a difficult process for you to do by yourself, a counselor or coach can be helpful. If not with a professional, then at least let your beliefs be open to scrutiny by a trusted friend or significant other.

With your written list, work through as many reasons to call B.S. as you can think of. Write them out and present your argument. This doesn’t have to be a quick process, take as much time as necessary to make your case. Especially with the help of another person, you will begin to see all of the ways in which your beliefs aren’t true and find all of the reasons you need to believe you can succeed.

4. Replace Them With Unlimited Beliefs

To move forward effectively, you can’t just drop your limiting beliefs and get back to life as usual. In order to reach your most powerful life, you’ve got replace the old, limiting beliefs with new, empowering ones.

If one of your limiting beliefs was, “I don’t deserve success because of xyz,” you need to replace it with, “I do deserve success because of abc,” and then list out all the reasons why.

It’s such a simple step but so many people neglect it. They’re just so happy to be rid of their old limiting beliefs, I guess. But what good is it to just be neutral? You’ve got to create an upgrade for every belief you just tore down. You’ve got to replace the limited ones with unlimited.

On that list, you created earlier, or on a new page if you’ve run out of room, write out your empowering, replacement beliefs. Keep going until each one is now optimized with a belief that removes those old limits you placed on yourself.

“Do the uncomfortable. Become comfortable with these acts. Prove to yourself that your limiting beliefs die a quick death if you will simply do what you feel uncomfortable doing.” ―Darren Rowse

5. Use Your New Beliefs To Find Success

You’ve got just one more step to go and that is to implement your new beliefs. Put your full faith in them as if they will succeed because they will. Use your fresh, new enthusiasm to push you through to success in areas where you only saw limitation before.

You will not fail because when we truly believe we are capable of success that is what we achieve. Be encouraged—every new success you have will only strengthen your beliefs. Congratulations, you are now on your way to living your most powerful life!

What are you doing today to make the most of your life? Comment below!

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3 Purchases Of $100 Or Less That Have Changed My Life.

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A popular question made famous by a certain 4-Hour Work Week author has been doing the rounds a lot lately. It’s an incredibly powerful question and I want to share with you my answer.

By the way, my answer is not some cheap product placement or a dodgy infomercial in case you were wondering.

3 purchases of $100 or Less that changed my life are:

 

Purchase #1 A meditation app.

The app called Calm to be more specific. It won Apple’s App Of The Year and it’s helped me chill the F out after tackling every fear I have. We all need to get out of our head more.

 

Purchase #2 A wireless computer keyboard.

Buy a wireless keyboard and use it with your laptop, tablet or phone wherever you are. Every day, aim to write one thing that inspires someone else. Post your written words on a blog (ideally someone else’s who has a large audience).

While you’re at work during the day, observe your surroundings as they are. Single out the positive things you see and share them online for all of us to see. When you type those words on your little wireless keyboard, pour every ounce of emotion you have into them.

Wake up one night, write something inspiring, and feel the tears drip from your eyes as you make yourself emotional because you know you’ve given it everything you’ve got. Know that every word you write for someone else is how you can give back to the world.

You can’t sit at home on your computer all day long and play games, watch porn and scroll your social media like a hamster going around and around on its wheel. Your keyboard is how you take the problems of our society and do something about them.

Know that the words you type will be most valuable when they are positive and instructive. There’s enough negativity in the world and your little wireless keyboard gives you the chance to do something about that injustice.

Wake up early in the morning (5 am) and make it a habit of writing something. “How To’s” work best. As you continue this habit, be vulnerable. Tell stories with your little wireless keyboard and share your biggest fears. Make your words human because that’s what you are after all.

Tell everybody how you had your heart broken, suffered mental health issues, lost someone you love, battled a health issue – these situations and what you’ve learned will help others the most.

Everything you’ve experienced to this day has brought you to these words you type to inspire others. Write about what makes you happy and fuse your passion together with your words.

Know that you’ll get emails after you type these words for at least a year, from people who have benefited from your writing. Reply to these emails and help where you can. Know that one day you’ll get an email from a reader that will cause you to break down and get emotional.

This email you eventually get will be the trigger for you to stop and evaluate what you’re typing these words for. When that moment comes, you’ll pick up your wireless keyboard again and continue writing because you’ll know you’re helping people. These words are actually making you fulfilled.

Along the way, as your readers increase, you’ll come across the evil species we call trolls and some critics too. The words that these people type on their wireless keyboards will hurt you at first and take you by surprise. You’ll eventually realize that everyone faces these same demons.

It’s not you; it’s them. Don’t let these haters stop you from writing words on your little wireless keyboard and keep pouring your heart out.

Your big viral moment thanks to your wireless keyboard will come at some stage. Don’t let this moment sidetrack you from the reason why you bought this wireless keyboard and started typing. Your newfound celebrity status will encourage your big fat ego, and that will take away all of the good your words have done.

Now that your life has been changed forever by your little wireless keyboard, keep going. You can change the world with your keyboard if you keep going and never give up your habit. Typing these words daily is the best kind of therapy there is for the troubles and challenges this life will throw at you.

One day, you’ll know what it’s like to be a leader, creator and inspiration for others thanks to your little wireless keyboard. Until then, keep typing those words. Your words matter and they can inspire others, and change the world at the same time.

 

Purchase #3 A pair of kid’s soccer boots for $79.95

This purchase works best when given to a kid that comes from a broken home and it will show them that strangers care. When the mother comes over and thanks you with tears in her eyes, you’ll understand the power of kindness. This will change your life.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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