Connect with us

Life

3 Simple Steps to Being Happy Every Single Day

Published

on

3 Simple Steps to Being Happy Every Single Day

Do you ever wake up and think, “I hope I feel sad today?” Of course not. We all want to have amazing, happy-go-lucky days.

But as the Rembrandts taught us in the Friends theme song, sometimes you feel like “it hasn’t been your day, your week, your month, or even your year…

Whether you have someone “there for you” or not, there is always a way to maximize your happiness, even on those not-so-good times. It takes a little time and a lot of self-reflection to really hone in on your true happiness. I think being happy is what life is all about. So why not put the time in to achieve it? Why not try to maximize it?

It’s silly not to. Downright stupid, actually. So I challenge you to follow these three basic steps. Don’t just skim them over and “kinda sorta” consider them maybe… for later… possibly. Really think about each one and how it would change your quality of life to be truly happy.

Here are 3 steps to being happy every single day:

Step #1: Surround yourself with positive people

What I’ve found is that most days I don’t even realize I’m not feeling happy until I see someone who is. This person is usually not just a little happy, they are genuinely, ridiculously, uncontrollably, obsessed-with-life happy. Try to find these people in your life and just be around them.

If you were stuck outside at a concert when a torrential downpour began, which person would be the one spinning in circles with their face to the sky still singing the lyrics to the songs? THAT is the person you need to hang around more. That friend who ran to the nearest bathroom screaming and stomping? Spend less time with them.

Learn to love positive people and to surround yourself with positive people and you’ll find yourself becoming much happier.

“Surround yourself with people who are only going to lift you higher.” – Oprah Winfrey

Step #2: Identify, seek, and destroy the negative

For one reason or another, we are all attracted to the negative side of a situation. For a lot of people, “seeing the bright side” is easier said than done. Even though it may sound counterproductive, identifying the negative can help you discover the positive.

The key is to have that “aha” moment when you catch yourself being “Negative Nancy.” Identify that you’re being a downer for no reason, and push that negativity away. For instance, if I’m at the store and there’s a long line and only one register is open, more often than not I’m irritated. So I’ll try to:

  • Stop and realize I’m just being negative (Identify)
  • Think about how small this problem is (Seek)
  • Do something positive (Destroy)

Sometimes you need to pause and realize that other people are having worse moments right now than you having to stand in line at register four. Perhaps I could take out my phone and check my email. Maybe even call my mom, because I’ve been putting it off for three days. Bottom line is, by doing something productive with the time spent, I’m creating a positive.

 

Step #3: Do good for others

To truly maximize your happiness, you have to bring happiness to others. This is probably the most important step. Have you ever had a really good day? Stop and think to yourself, “What was it that made it so special?” It’s likely that something happened that day to make you smile.

Maybe a co-worker brought you a donut. Or a stranger held the door open for you even though you were slightly farther away and you had to run a little because you felt bad. Or maybe you just simply received an unexpected compliment. These little things matter. Kindness matters.

Bringing happiness to someone else’s day also brings happiness to your day. That person who held the door for you, I’m sure they felt pretty darn good about it. When that co-worker picked up that box of donuts for the office, they were probably really pleased when they dropped them off. Putting a smile on another person’s face creates a smile on your own. This generates a whole beautiful mess of happiness.

“We are here on earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don’t know.” – W. H. Auden

So at the end of the day, just try to always remember there is good out there. There are genuinely happy people. So let’s all become them. Let’s inspire others to do the same. Let’s be really, ridiculously, uncontrollably, obsessed-with-life happy.

Thanks for reading my article! What have you done today to bring happiness into someone else’s day?

Yannick van den Bos is a world traveled young successful internet marketer & -entrepreneur. Yannick has helped hundreds of aspiring entrepreneurs start a profitable online business from scratch, while traveling the world. Learn more here: http://www.yannickvandenbos.com/

Advertisement
3 Comments

3 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Published

on

Image Credit: Canva

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Published

on

Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
Continue Reading

Trending