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Success Advice

3 Signs You’re Helping Raise a Quitter

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3 signs you're raising a quitter
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Quitting is a bad habit and one that is taught and learned. As parents, we have way more control over this than we think, or even want to take responsibility for. Our children emulate what they see. If you bounce from job to job, or hobby to hobby, your child is more likely to do the same.

Conversely, if you have been committed to your marriage, your career, your faith, or to a fitness regimen, your children are likely to do the same. Duplication is by no means guaranteed, and as a father of 5 who has stumbled, fumbled, and bumbled my way through parenthood, I’ve discovered 3 key indicators of when I am enabling, perhaps even cultivating, a culture of quitting.

1. You Use Your Excuses As Their Exit

Being a good parent is hard. Very hard. Harder than most people think. Combine this with your faith, a meaningful relationship with your spouse, a career, a fitness regimen, and you’ve got a resume that would make any circus juggler envious.

It’s our job as parents to nurture the interests and creativity of our children. So what do we do? We have them learn an instrument. We put them in sports. We send them to coding or acting class. We keep them busy-especially during the summer months. Here’s the catch, keeping them busy makes you busier.

After a particularly stressful day, the last thing you want to hear is, “Mommy/Daddy I have practice at 6:30 pm.” Don’t even get me started if you are the coach. All you want to do is sit on the couch. I’ve been there. When I get home after a long day, I don’t want to jump back in my car to drop off my kid.

Your child sees this and feeds off this energy. The last thing a kid wants to hear or see is their mom or dad groan about taking them to band practice after anxiously waiting for you to come home for the last hour. It sets a precedence and one that children can use as leverage to quit in the future. Remember, everything is fun in the beginning-until you want to be exceptional at it. Then the reality of what it takes to be good settles in. When this reality settles in is when most people, not only children, abandon their goals or dreams.

“But Paul, I have to force my kid to go and it’s a battle every time.” I’ve been there. It is easy to just give up and let your child stay home or worse yet, quit because you don’t want to deal with the regular confrontation of forcing them to participate in their activities or because you are exhausted. You cannot permit your lethargy as a way out for your child or they will use your moment of weakness as an escape. Once your child learns how to use this as leverage they will exploit it. Trust me. They will. I know some of you will argue, “Not my child.” and I’ll just smile and agree with you. Don’t let your excuses be the reason your children quit.

“Once you learn to quit, it becomes a habit.” – Vince Lombardi

2. You Finish/Fix Things For Them

It never fails. There is a class assignment or a science fair and one child turns in a project or a diorama that was clearly completed by a parent. I’m not trying to make a blanket statement, I realize that there are many talented children who are beyond their years, but let’s be real. When Tommy turns in a model of Fenway Park that looks like Frank Lloyd Wright could have done it, it’s going to raise an eyebrow.

I’m all for participating in the assignment with your kid and using it as an opportunity to connect, just not doing it for them. Winning an award for work they did not personally complete is just as bad, or worse than participation trophies. Buy them the supplies and all the tools they need to complete the assignment, just don’t do it for them or you’ll find yourself doing this more times than you think.

It is important that we let our children finish what they start. This applies to everything, even household chores. There are more times than I can count where I ask one of my kids to do something, knowing that I can get it done faster and better than they can, and yet I sit on the sidelines watching and waiting for them to complete the tasks.

It wasn’t always this way. I used to:  1) assign a chore to my children, 2) wait for them to complete it, 3) get tired of waiting, and 4) do it myself. This was a horrible pattern and it taught them that if they didn’t do something, it would eventually get done by someone else. Bad. Bad. Bad.

There is an amazing sense of satisfaction and self worth that is accompanied with finishing things on our own and as parents, it can be challenging to watch our children struggle, but it is necessary.

“Winners are not those who never fail, but those who never quit.” – Edwin Louis Cole

3. You Make Quitting an Option

I cringe when I hear someone say, “Try it, and if you don’t like it-quit.” When you start something with that kind of mentality you have one foot in, and one foot out the door. I’m not saying that there isn’t a time and place for exploring options, because there is. I am saying however, that if all you are doing is exploring options, and never committing to them, you are setting yourself up for guaranteed failure.

Shame on you if you are teaching your children the same method of operation. Live your life as you wish, but don’t rob your child of the pride and self satisfaction that comes from committing to something and following it through.

My wife and I have taken our children to their activities on days when they were kicking, screaming and even crying. We’ve taken them on days where we were tired, hungry, stressed out, and broke. We are non-negotiable. My kids know this. In our family it isn’t about being the best in as much as it is about finishing what you start. Being the best is a by-product of staying committed and putting in the work when others are “trying it out.”

If you make quitting an option, most children will opt in and develop a habit of not finishing what they start. If you make finishing the only option they know, they are less likely to head for the hills upon the first roadblock they hit.

I hope you enjoyed this piece may it bring more commitment and success to you and your children.

My name is Paul Argueta. I have been featured on the Inc 5000 list twice. I own a real estate brokerage and employ over 100 independent contractors as real estate agents. I am a huge sports nut and decided that I would find a way to combine sports with real estate. These days I assist Pro Athletes during their relocation process and even E-Sports gamers. I am happily married with 5 children. Balancing the pursuit of success while being a present husband and father is a challenge and my passion. You can reach me at https://www.facebook.com/talktopaulargueta.

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Personal Development

These 11 Habits Will Make You More Productive, Successful, and Confident

Boost your focus, confidence, and results with 11 powerful habits successful people use every day.

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how to build self-confidence through action
Image Credit: Midjourney

Successful people love to help beginners. They have an incredible work ethic and rarely complain. As a result, others naturally look up to them and want to follow in their footsteps.

But here’s the truth: there’s no success without sacrifice. You’ll need to give up comfort, excuses, and sometimes even social approval to accomplish your goals.

Value comes from solving problems, and these 11 powerful tips will help you become more productive, successful, and confident, starting today.

1. Take Short Breaks After Finishing a Task

Psychology shows it’s important to reward positive behaviour.

After completing a big task or finishing a book, take five minutes to walk, stretch, or simply breathe. This quick reset helps your brain recharge and strengthens focus.

Many great writers swear by morning walks, solitude, and reflection can unlock creativity.

But if you refuse to take breaks, don’t be surprised when burnout hits. Your brain needs recovery time just as much as your body does.

2. Schedule Your Most Important Tasks First

Multitasking kills productivity. If you want to get more done, try time blocking, a method where you dedicate set periods for specific tasks.

Productivity expert Caitlin Hughes explains, “Time blocking involves scheduling blocks of time for your tasks throughout the day.”

For example, if you’re a writer:

  • Research your topic at night.

  • Write your first draft in the morning (don’t worry if it’s rough).

  • Edit in the afternoon, great writing comes from rewriting.

You can’t buy more time. Use it intentionally and without regret.

3. Eliminate Distractions from Your Workspace

Focus is the foundation of success.

According to Inc. Magazine, it takes an average of 23 minutes to recover from a distraction. That’s nearly half an hour of lost productivity every time you check your phone.

Put your phone away. Close unnecessary tabs. And yes, limit your Netflix binges.

Meeting deadlines consistently is one of the fastest ways to stand out and earn respect.

4. Take Full Responsibility for Your Life

Entrepreneur Derek Sivers once said, “Everything is my fault.”

This mindset doesn’t mean self-blame; it means self-ownership. Stop pointing fingers, making excuses, or waiting for others to change.

If your habits (like smoking or drinking too much) hold you back, it’s time to make better choices. Your friends can’t live your dreams for you; only you can.

5. Invest an Hour a Day in Learning New Skills

Knowledge compounds over time.

Whether you read books, take online courses, or practise a craft, consistent learning gives you a competitive edge.

I used to struggle with academic writing, but I improved by studying the work of great authors and applying what I learned.

Your past doesn’t define you; your actions do. Every new skill adds another tool to your arsenal and makes you more unstoppable.

6. Develop a Growth Mindset

Psychologist Dr. Carol Dweck introduced the concept of fixed vs. growth mindset.

  • A fixed mindset believes success is based on natural talent.

  • A growth mindset believes success comes from effort and learning.

Choose the growth mindset. Embrace challenges. See failures as feedback. In today’s fast-moving digital world, adaptability is your biggest advantage.

7. Learn Marketing to Reach People Who Need You

I once believed marketing was manipulative, until I realised it’s about helping people solve problems.

If your work provides genuine value, marketing is how you let others know it exists. Even Apple spends billions on it.

Don’t be ashamed to promote your skills or business. Without visibility, your ideas will never reach the people who need them most.

Creative professionals who understand marketing and sales have an unfair advantage.

8. Ask Your Mentor the Right Questions

Good mentors can fast-track your growth.

While mentorship often costs money, it’s one of the best investments you can make. Great mentors don’t care about titles; they care about your progress.

If you don’t have access to a mentor yet, books are your silent mentors. Read the best in your field, take notes, and apply what resonates.

9. Build Confidence Through Action, Not Affirmations

Author Ryan Holiday once said, “I don’t believe in myself. I have evidence.”

Confidence doesn’t come from shouting affirmations into the mirror; it comes from proof. Doing hard things, keeping promises to yourself, and following through.

When you consistently take action, your brain gathers evidence that you can handle whatever comes next. That’s real confidence, grounded, earned, and unshakable.

10. Focus on Your Strengths

Your strengths reveal where your greatest impact lies.

If people compliment you on something often, it’s a clue. Lean into it.

A former professor once told me I was creative, and that simple comment gave me the confidence to go all in. I studied creativity, applied it daily, and turned it into my career advantage.

Double down on your strengths. That’s how you build momentum and mastery.

11. Identify and Challenge Your Limiting Beliefs

Your beliefs shape your reality.

For years, I believed I couldn’t be a great writer because of my chronic tinnitus and astigmatism, sensory challenges that made concentration difficult. But over time, I realised those struggles made me more disciplined, observant, and empathetic.

Your limitations can become your greatest motivators if you let them.

Avoid shortcuts. Growth takes time, but it’s always worth it.

Final Thoughts

Becoming productive, successful, and confident isn’t about working harder than everyone else. It’s about working smarter, consistently, and intentionally.

You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight. Start small: take a break after your next task, schedule your priorities, or spend one hour learning something new.

Every habit you change compounds into long-term success. Remember, true change comes from practising new behaviours.

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Success Advice

Why One-Size-Fits-All Leadership Will Always Fail (and What Works Instead)

The surprising truth about leadership styles that can make or break your team’s success.

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Why one-size-fits-all leadership doesn’t work
Image Credit: Midjourney

Leadership has always been as much about people as it is about performance. Ken Blanchard, in his influential book, “The One Minute Manager”, put it simply: different strokes for different folks. (more…)

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Success Advice

What Every New CEO Must Do in Their First 100 Days (or Risk Failure)

Your first 100 days as CEO could define your entire legacy, here’s how to make every move count

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leadership tips for new CEO
Image Credit: Midjourney

When Tim Cook took over from Steve Jobs at Apple, the world watched with bated breath. Jobs wasn’t just a CEO; he was a visionary, an icon, and a legend of innovative leadership. (more…)

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Entrepreneurs

The Leadership Shift Every Company Needs in 2025

Struggling to keep your team engaged? Here’s how leaders can turn frustrated employees into loyal advocates.

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Bridging the gap between employees and employers
Image Credit: Midjourney

In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”

While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.

Why This Gap Exists

Every workplace needs someone to guide, supervise, and provide feedback. That’s essential for productivity and performance. But because there are usually far more employees than managers, dissatisfaction, fair or not, spreads quickly.

What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap

Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.

1. Practice Mutual Empathy

Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.

3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.

7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.

9. Eliminate Favoritism

Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.

10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role

Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:

  • Build diverse talent pipelines

  • Embrace flexible work models

  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

  • Redefine the value HR brings

The challenge? Employers and employees often view these priorities differently. Bridging that perception gap is just as important as bridging the relational gap between leaders and staff.

Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff

When you treat employees like partners, they bring their best selves to work. HR leaders must develop strategies to keep talent engaged, empowered, and prepared for the future.

Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

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