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Success Advice

The Only Rules For Being Human

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Being human is bloody hard work. When you’re born, no one gives you a rulebook.

There’s no manual for life or the body and mind you’ve been given. For the first twenty to thirty years of your life, you have no clue about anything. For those of us who are a bit older, we have plenty of wisdom to pass down.

These are the only rules for being human that I’ve see in my own life and in others:

 

You’re beautiful

No one ever tells you this. Deep down you know it subconsciously, but until it’s pointed out, life seems to be missing something. Until you come to this realization, everything doesn’t quite make sense. It’s like you have the jigsaw puzzle of life and are missing three out of the nine hundred pieces. It’s not enough to stuff up the end picture, but it’s enough to create a void.

When I say beautiful, I mean that in the physical, spiritual, emotional and intellectual sense. Compared to other animals, you have it all. Abundance is all around you and best of all you get to live a long life compared to other species. Do you ever stop to ponder this fact?

Does anyone ever tell you that life is freaking amazing and you should stop and think about that for a second? No, they don’t. They tell you to “Keep hustling baby!” and “Keep looking for your passion.”

What if the fact you’re beautiful outweighed all of this other nonsense? Every single one of us is mind blowing. We’re beautiful when we solve problems together. We’re beautiful when we’re home alone pondering life. We’re beautiful 100% of the time. That’s how we were created. Believe it!

 

The world owes you jack

Just having oxygen in your lungs is a miracle. The fact you were the successful sperm that survived amongst all the others is phenomenal. Being born into this world is already enough and everything that happens after that is a privilege.

You’re not entitled to anything. No one is going to give you anything. Everything you get is a direct result of what action you take. Even taking action is not enough. If your actions don’t follow this formula you’re screwed:

– Your actions must reflect the truth
– Your actions must serve all of us on some level
– Most of all, your actions must be aligned with who you are

Not following this formula will see you take action towards goals that never get fulfilled. This turns into a cup full of your hopes and dreams that at the same time is leaking all over the floor. The world is not going to block those leaks for you, or stop your leaky cup – you have to. It’s all you.

 

Your mind starts as a blank canvas

You’re not born with anything. Everything that happens in your life after you’re born is painted in your mind. So if you start with a blank canvas, then it’s up to you to create the artwork. Only you can turn that artwork into a masterpiece.

How do you do that? You’ve got to intentionally fill your mind with inputs that are going to help you break through the negativity that exists everywhere. Unless you take control, your blank canvas will be painted by the world around you.

That world is negative as hell. If you let that be the result then instead of ending up with a Picasso, you’ll end up with misspelled graffiti that’s created by a delinquent child who refuses to grow up.

Painting this canvas, by the way, will be your fulltime job.

Your body is as magnificent as you think it is

That body you’ve been given doesn’t need to change; you need to change the way you think about it. It’s already pure perfection so don’t let society tell you that you must change it.

You’ve been given two arms to hug those you care about. You’ve been given two legs to walk you through life’s biggest challenges. You’ve been given a heart capable of loving anyone and anything. You’ve been given two eyes to see your vision come to life for real. You’ve been given lips to kiss the one that captures your heart.

“Don’t be scared of the body you do have; be scared of what the body you have been given can achieve when you decide never to give up and pursue your dreams with all you’ve got”

 

You can only learn

Every mishap is nothing more than an experiment. Failure doesn’t exist only lessons. You’ve heard this cliché so many times before and that’s only because it’s true. When you hear something over and over, you must listen to what that message is trying to tell you. Life is nothing but learning.

“The truth is you never reach mastery”

You’re a fulltime student for your entire life and the results of your experiments are determined by you. See your experiments as necessary and magical, and you’ll get the lesson about lifelong learning.

I’ve learned to take time for myself, be compassionate, be kind to myself and to inspire others. What will your experiments teach you?

 

Right now is already your best moment

There is no future moment when you will have arrived. Only when you realize you have arrived right now, will the future be what you want. It’s right now that has to change. Right now has to be the best time of your life.

It’s this whole idea of “One day in the future” that tears down everything we have worked hard for. YOU HAVE TO LOVE RIGHT NOW! NOW IS THE TIME OF YOUR LIFE!

Will you even get a chance in the future to have your best moment? Maybe not. Then you will have died never knowing how insanely cool life can be.

 

Your perception of others is a reflection of you

All those harsh remarks you make about people’s weight, their intelligence, and how they act, is a direct reflection of you. It was only when I personally tried to reframe from judging others so much that I saw who I could really be.

Judging others forms a roadblock to the life you’ve always dreamt of. The way you perceive others is the way you perceive yourself. Treat others nicely and you’ll treat yourself the same way. I know this advice seems confusing at first, but it will make sense when you try it.

Replace your judgment for compassion towards others. Supercharge your results by going that extra mile and inspiring people at the same time. I’m not sure why, but when you do this, everything starts to change. There’s no going back once you reach this level in your life.

From this point, you can go on to do whatever you want. People will conspire in your favor. Money starts to become irrelevant. You’ll discover a side to you that you never thought could ever exist. You’ll see a reflection in the mirror that makes you so proud. This moment could also make you cry. That’s okay too.

 

Your life is the result of what you make of it

The word “Life” should have it’s meaning replaced with one sentence: A list of decisions. Your life is just one big decision list. The more fear and vulnerability you use in each decision you make, the more you make of your life.

As you get better at making decisions, your life get’s better too. Every decision you have to make comes with an intuitive response from within. Let’s not get all spiritual though. That intuitive response is the decision you must make. It just comes down to whether you have the guts to do what is right.

“There are no external forces that will control what your life becomes. All of your results come from within”

 

When there’s no answer, it’s love

Each of us reaches a point where we become stuck. We look everywhere and can’t find the answer sometimes. When you become lost and feel like the compass is lying to you, understand that the answer is always love.

It means you must give more love and find ways to bring more love into your life. Love is a very powerful weapon that can help you get through anything.

It’s also a word that scares the pants off people because they think it makes them weird or not like everyone else. Love can sometimes be seen as very “Woo Woo.”

If you have no other answer, then it’s worth a shot, right? What’s the worst that can happen? You spread love and nothing comes back? You already know that’s still a pretty good result. Nothing has been wasted in this experiment.

 

You have every answer already

Every answer exists in your mind already. It always has. Your mind is like a maze and when you learn to navigate through it, you find the answers that were there all along.

 

Forgive yourself

You do some dumb stuff sometimes. Be kind to yourself and realize that no one is perfect. You can be the average of the five greatest people in the entire world and still make huge mistakes. You can read every self-help book on Amazon and still mess up.

You can quit alcohol for five years and still go backward again. You can decide never to cheat again and still end up giving in to temptation. All of these situations are entirely possible. When they happen, forgive yourself. Sometimes you will go backward, but that’s only so you can move forward even faster.

 

Feel emotion every single day

That means you must laugh, take time to use your mind to think and let emotion overwhelm you in the form of tears every single day you are on this planet.

To not feel the gift of emotion is the ultimate crime. It’s what will give you the motivation, relaxation and inclination to live the best life you possibly can. If your days seem boring it’s because you’ve forgotten these three gifts.

These gifts sound so dumb and can easily be dismissed. Like I always say “Success is ‘stupid smart’ and not rocket science.” All the little things you dismiss are what’s causing you all of your pain.

 

You will F all of this up

All the rules for being human that I just gave you will be messed up by you at some point.

It’s a money back guarantee and entirely expected. So now that we’ve cleared this up, when you break a rule now and then, realize it’s okay and just go back to the game plan. Adjust, focus, reposition again, and lock and load. Then pull the trigger again and insist on fearing less.

We all f stuff up. It’s part of being human and yet another rule.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Jim

    Sep 15, 2017 at 12:48 pm

    This “The world owes you jack” is probably the most important mindset to adopt, especially nowadays with all the people running around (especially younger ones) demanding that they just “get” stuff. Blows my mind, really, but it is what it is. Good read!

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Success Advice

The 6 Step Process for Delivering Critical Feedback in a Constructive Way

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We have all been in the position where we knew we needed to have a difficult conversation at work that involved delivering constructive feedback. Maybe a major deadline was missed, there was a clear decline in performance, or someone blatantly dropped the ball. Most of us avoid delivering the feedback, and the conversation can get pushed back again and again, wasting valuable time and money.

Delivering constructive feedback is challenging, and uncomfortable for most people, even highly trained leaders. Yet, delivering and accepting feedback is one of the most important keys for success. So why do we avoid these conversations? Because we never learned how to have them.

Open, honest, direct communication is not a skill we are taught in school. There is no “How to Have Tough Conversations” 101. As a clinical psychologist that specializes in couples work, I see just how important communication is in maintaining thriving relationships. I understand that good communication is the foundation of every successful relationship; both intimate relationships and your work relationships.

Below is a 6-step guide to providing constructive feedback:

Step 1: Clarity on the Goal of the Conversation  

The first step is to get clear on the goal of the feedback conversation. Are you planning to see a change in performance, simply communicate how you felt, or receive an apology? Get clear on what you are hoping to get out of the conversation. Be honest with yourself about what you need, what is most helpful to the relationship, and what is most helpful to the organization. Getting clear on the goal also ensures you are speaking with the right person.

“I think it’s very important to have a feedback loop, where you’re constantly thinking about what you’ve done and how you could be doing it better.” – Elon Musk

Step 2: Invitation

Set up a time to talk. Feedback conversations are not meant to be had in the hallway. It is important that both parties can set aside adequate time and have the space needed for dialogue. Additionally, there must be respect for both parties’ need for time to process information. For example, if you are delivering feedback, and the receiver needs time to process the feedback before responding, setting up a subsequent meeting will be most helpful.

Step 3: Ownership

Own the role you played in creating the situation. When you model ownership of blind spots, failures, or missteps, you set the stage for the receiver to do the same. For example, you may acknowledge that you were not aware of how to support your employee and not aware of the problem until x situation occurred. Equally important as owning your role, is owning your emotions. Own your emotions using “I” statements. For example, “I felt disappointed when I realized your sales performance had substantially declined”.

Step 4: Open, Honest, Direct Feedback

Feedback that dances around the problem does not do anyone any good. It only increases anxiety on behalf of the receiver, and potentially causes the feedback to get totally lost. The conversation needs to be open, honest, and direct. For example: “I felt concerned when you did not attend the last two strategy calls this month…It brought up questions for me about your commitment to the company.”

Step 5: Listen, Validate and Accept

When providing feedback, it is important both parties maintain an open mind, and respond in a way that communicates validation and acceptance. As soon as an individual gets defensive, feedback cannot be taken in, and the value of the conversation dramatically decreases. When providing feedback it is important to listen, validate, and accept your receiver’s viewpoint. Notice, I did not say agree. This looks something like saying: “I can see why X led you to commit Y , I understand you were under a great deal of stress/dealing with a personal situation/frustrated.”

“We all need people who will give us feedback. That’s how we improve.” – Bill Gates

Step 6: A Clear Plan for Moving Forward

In providing feedback, the magic is that now things can change! If feedback is never given, relationships end, things will stay the same, businesses will die, and money will be lost. If you have gotten to this step, that means you did the hard work, and now you get to put change into action. A clear plan includes an acknowledgement from both parties regarding what they will do differently to prevent the situation from occurring again, and how they will stay accountable in making the change happen.

The good news about delivering feedback is that the more you do it, the easier it gets. Remember, giving and receiving feedback is one of the most surefire ways to open yourself up to massive growth.

As a giver of feedback, it is your job to model openness and a desire for growth, so that the receiver may take in the feedback and make the necessary changes. Exceling at feedback delivery will help you set you apart from others and enable you to achieve extraordinary relationships, in both your personal and work lives.

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Success Advice

Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

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Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

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5 Essential Skills to Drive Success in Every Niche

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There are many people who don’t have the courage to launch a business in a niche as they think they don’t have the right skills and experience to obtain success. While there are specific skills which determine the success in every niche, there are also some general skills which ensure success in any business you would try.

Below are 5 essential skills you need to drive success in every aspect of your life:

1. Ambition

When you launch a new business, you need to be prepared for difficult moments such as fighting the competition and winning your target audience. Moreover, if you follow some successful entrepreneurs, you should keep in mind that they also faced difficulties and continue to experience them. So, how does a successful entrepreneur get over all the difficulties?

The essential skill you need to possess is called ambition. Set small and clear milestones in your development plan and use your ambition to go over each difficulty and finalize what you had in your mind. It doesn’t matter how hard the path is going to be. Visualize your target and put in all the efforts to achieve it. Staying organized and scheduling each step to get things done are some of the techniques you can use to achieve success.

2. Listen to those around you

While listening to your instincts is necessary if you want to be a successful entrepreneur, this is not enough. As your business develops, you will have an entire team to manage and lead to success. Therefore, you cannot be a successful leader and have success in every niche unless you learn how to listen to the people around you.

You should listen to your employees and discover what they are expecting from you. This is the way to follow if you want to keep your team motivated and help them give the best of themselves.

On the other hand, you will need to listen to your customers to improve your products and services and provide excellent customer support. By listening carefully to the voice of your customers, you will be able to stand out of the competition and ensure their loyalty towards your brand.

“We see our customers as invited guests to a party, and we are the hosts. It’s our job every day to make every important aspect of the customer experience a little bit better.” – Jeff Bezos

3. Courage

When you decided to become an entrepreneur and build your own business, it means you are a courageous person. Courage will help you harness the power of creativity. Don’t be afraid to take risks if you feel a specific action will bring more success to your business.

Apart from doing intensive research on your ideas and developing the exact steps you are going to follow, you will need the courage to implement them. Not all the ideas will turn out to be successful.

Regardless, you will have something to learn from each success or mistake and this will help you move your business even further. When you have the courage to follow a path which is not very familiar to you, this is going to be the moment when you will widen your horizons and exceed your limits to achieve success.

4. Creativity and imagination

If you already implemented your idea and you see that it works, you most probably think that you don’t need to change anything to achieve more success. You need to keep in mind that customers’ preferences change and your competition is waiting for your mistakes to “steal” your clients.

Therefore, you need to use your creativity and imagination to improve your products and services to meet your customers’ expectations. What is more, creativity can also mean that you are open to talk to new people and use their experience to improve something in your business.

“Get closer than ever to your customers. So close that you tell them what they need well before they realize it themselves.” – Steve Jobs

5. Continuous learning

If you want to drive success in every niche you will need to show a willingness to learn. You need to stay updated with what happens in your niche and what your customers expect from you.

Education is not only something for school. It is a lifelong process, and you should be open to seek knowledge and improve your skills with every opportunity. An efficient trick is to stay close to people who are already successful in your industry, ask their opinions on various subjects and learn from their experience.

The above five essential skills will help you build a successful business in every niche. A true leader is ambitious, knows to listen to the people around him, and is always open to learning from others.

No matter the size of your business, you will need to be creative and use your imagination to improve your products and services. These skills will help any leader develop new skills, stand out of the crowd, and strengthen his position on the market.

What skill do you think is most important to be successful in life? Let us know below!

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5 Key Investment Principles from Warren Buffett

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Warren Buffett is a mentor for a lot of traders. Why shouldn’t he be? After all, his investing principles have earned him the title of the world’s greatest investor. His way of working is a little contradictory to many others in the arena of online trading. He doesn’t invest the way it’s depicted in the popular media. He is the kind of investor who likes buying and holding.

Buffett has taught us that once you buy a stock, hold it no matter what. Forget that there is a recession in the economy or it is at its boom. Whether it’s good times or bad, you’re supposed to hold onto the stock.

Buffett doesn’t just buy stocks for the sake of holding them. He buys them for a specific reason. When those reasons no longer exist, he sells the stocks. He not only looks for good prices but sound management and a competitive advantage. He shared his opinion that companies such as IBM, Sears, and GM are great but they cannot stay competitive for long. Therefore, these companies shouldn’t be a part of your portfolio.

Why not learn from the pro himself and invest the right way? Here are 5 key principles to begin with:

1. Invest In What You Know

Before investing in a stock, it is very important to understand what a company does and how it makes its money. Ever wondered why Buffett has always avoided investing in tech stocks? It’s because he does not completely understand their business model. He sticks to what he knows.

This also explains why he prefers investing in Berkshire’s stocks. It represents a diverse mix of stocks such as utilities, banking, and insurance and consumer products. All of these are businesses that Buffett understands very well. No wonder he has invested a significant amount of money here.

“Beware the investment activity that produces applause; the great moves are usually greeted by yawns.”  – Warren Buffett

2. Before Buying a Stock, List the Criteria

It makes sense to buy stocks on the basis of criteria, right? After all, you’re ensuring that you don’t end up investing in something unfavorable. You could be searching for stocks in a certain industry with a set price to earnings ratio.

Buffett never makes the price of the stock the sole criteria of his buying decision. Sometimes, great companies end up taking a price dip because of the market situation. However, holding onto these stocks could still turn out to be favorable.

3. Be Aggressive During Tough Times

Generally, it’s not recommended to time the market. But if you’re a long-term investor, you’ll be fine no matter when you buy. This means that even during the tough economic times, you shouldn’t settle down. Keep on looking for opportunities. This is what Warren Buffett does because he knows that things will eventually turn around.

Buffett is known for capitalizing on opportunities during and after the great recession. Bank of America investment is one of the best examples of this. In his latest annual letter, Buffett said that “dark clouds will fill the sky almost after every decade. But it certainly will rain gold.” So don’t despair, keep on investing.

4. Don’t Worry About the Day to Day Market Movements

Along with other tips, Buffett also said that you must only buy a stock if you are comfortable holding on to it in case the stock market shuts down for a decade. Since you are holding onto the stocks for 10 or more years, there is no point in losing sleep over the minor swings.

Ignore the headlines about the trade wars, the government shutdown, and other chaotic news. Instead, you focus on learning the potential growth of your company over the course of time. The fact is, stock prices keep on changing, but it’s not significant if the company’s business still has a bright future.

“Only buy something that you’d be perfectly happy to hold if the market shut down for 10 years.” – Warren Buffett

5. Buy Buffett’s Stocks

Buffett keeps everything simple when it comes to investing. If you don’t want to do the guesswork and research to figure out which stocks to buy, simply invest in the stocks Buffett already owns. But, make sure you understand the business. Buffett discloses his holdings publically each quarter. He has capital in companies such as Wells Fargo, Apple, and Bank of America. To keep things simple, you can buy the shares of Berkshire Hathaway itself.

Warren Buffett hasn’t been successful all by himself. He has a team of investors who help him do legal work and give him investment tips. He’s also a part of an advisor network because he understands that an investor needs all the help he can get. It’s amazing that a billionaire like him still listens to others.

Now that you know how to invest like Buffett, it’s time you prepare your investment strategy. These principles are not hard and fast criteria, they are simply a discipline strategy all investors should stick to. Along with these, you can use math, technical analysis, fundamental analysis, and even stock charts to make a decision. You may not end up a billionaire, but you will avoid losses and make more profits than your fellows.

Which one of the 5 key investment principles from above resonated with you most? Let us know below!

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