There’s this dude at the office. He’s fucking unstoppable.

His shit don’t stink and everything he touches turns to gold. At least that’s what I used to think.

Really, in reality, he’s just charismatic.

That’s how he got the cool job, the hot wifey and why everyone wants to be friends with him including me.

What does he do? Let’s delve a little deeper and discuss the eight things that lead to being charismatic:

1. Being confident baby!

This dude at work has swag. He backs himself even if he has no freaking idea what’s going to go down homey. In a business context, people that are confident are proven to be more trustworthy.

We trust confident people because it’s infectious. We want to work and be around confident people because it feels good. When something feels good, we do it, and do it lots!

My buddy at work walks into the room and people shake his hand because his presence changes the game. He also does these few things:

– He dresses confidently
– He pops his chest out just a fraction (not like the guy on the Bonds Singlet packet)
– He looks people in the eye

Out of these three, looking people in the eye is the hardest to do. To look into someone’s eye is the most vulnerable state you can put yourself in.

“The difference is that when you’re vulnerable, you connect with people better”

It also shows that you’ve got guts and allows you to enter their world. Okay, that’s wacky stuff and I may sound like I’ve read one too many “Power Of the Universe” type books. Take it or leave it chief.

2. Passion surrounds them. It pours out of their eyeballs!

Even the words I write demonstrate this. You can tell from everything I’m saying right now that passion pours out of me. I freaking love what I do and it shows even though you can’t see me or hear my voice. Okay, that’s a fraction creepy…enough about me.

This almighty bloke at work is charismatic because his values and beliefs are based on his passion. Passion is like a magnet according to science. When we see passion, it makes us start acting with more passion. You’re drawn to charisma in the same way because you want more of it.

There’s no point pretending you don’t like to be passionate because we all do. Sometimes, we just get lost and lose our passion for life or our career. That’s okay! None of us are perfect souls who don’t lose our way once in a while. I’m fucking lost more than I’m on track half the time.

Bottom-line: charismatic people are surrounded by passion. I don’t care if it’s collecting matchsticks or building sand castles – find something to get excited about and then show your passion for it.

3. They’re not vain: selfies are not their highest priority.

This charismatic chappy at work doesn’t spend half his days taking selfies of himself and then posting it on social media.

He doesn’t take photos of his food and then post it on social – he just eats it. He’d rather jump off a bridge than be a pretentious snob who’s insecure and has an inflated ego to compensate.

“The number one sign of a pretentious person vs a charismatic person is that they take credit for things they didn’t do”

Or they make things sound ten times bigger than they actually are in reality. Don’t fall for this trap young Indiana Jones. You’re better than that!

4. Expressing yourself through great stories

Storytelling is one of the many traits a charismatic person has. If you listen closely to their stories, you’ll notice they use strong phrases like “I know X to be true” instead of phrases like “I think,” or “I hope” which sounds weak.

Through stories, you can be: funny, vulnerable and share embarrassing moments. That’s what charismatic people do and they draw everyone in through their stories. As a side note, their stories don’t go on forever and they know how to get to the point.

Become a charismatic poet through stories about your experiences. Educate and inspire people around you and you’ll be acting charismatic by default.

5. Make other people feel comfortable around you

Not everyone is a hero and is comfortable being charismatic and confident. You can demonstrate charisma by learning to make others feel relaxed around you. Make other people the center of attention and let them feel special. There’s a subtle difference between charisma and hogging the conversation with your own bombastic, overpowering, unnecessary and selfish talk.

Back down; you’re not that big of a deal. Once you do that, you’ll have entered the universe of charisma.

6. A clear purpose and vision. In other words, they know why.

Part of what makes up the DNA of a charismatic person is their purpose or vision for their life. Quite simply, they know what they’re on this planet to do. They have a goal, it’s measurable, and they’ll stop at nothing until they achieve it.

To be in this state requires a certain sort of self-confidence that charismatic people have in spades. People seem to rally around a person who knows their purpose.

You can’t do anything and be motivated unless you know why. Without a why you’ll never build up enough momentum to reach any sort of peak performance. Mediocrity happens to us when we give up too easily. When we start a new pursuit for 4 weeks and then give up.

Map the seven seas of why you exist. Do a heap of self-reflection if you need to, to find this vision and bring it to the surface.

7. They look approachable

Most people look like they’re zombies when you walk past them and they almost look like they’re going to explode if you dare talk to them. That’s not charisma pal!

That unapproachable zombie look is called being scared, fearful and afraid due to a lack of self-awareness and a lack of self-improvement. It’s not the end of the world and it can be turned around.

The difference with charismatic people is one little, tiny thing: they smile. All you have to do is change one little thing – smile a bit more. Smiling is contagious and it makes people feel confident. It also makes you feel freaking amazing too!

8. They give more than anyone else and expect jack in return

This last one is the toughest trait of charismatic people. It sounds incredibly difficult and that’s because it is. We all have our own selfish desires that make us feel good, although only for a moment.

Charismatic people wow everyone around them by always going above and beyond to give. They either give time, money, knowledge or a listening ear to those who need it. The crazy, passionate, charismatic people even combine several of these to produce an outcome that can only be described as extraordinary.

Many of us do in fact give; the challenge is we expect something back. Worse, we even complain when we do an honorable act and get nothing in return. This is not how to play the game of life. This selfish behavior will make you very unhappy until you cut it the hell out!

“The secret to living is giving ” Tony Robbins

So let’s go over this one more time boss. To harness the superpower of giving that leads to charisma you must:

– Be prepared to give more than anybody else
– Expect nothing in return
– Ensure your own foolish and selfish desires are not front of mind every day

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Everyone has dreams. We all want to make something of ourselves yet it’s only a tiny percentage of people ever follow through. The self-help world encourages us to “Think Big”, “Follow Your Passions”, “Live as if there was no such thing as failure” and it usually just leads to keeping people stuck in a dream state, wishing, hoping and fantasizing yet never actually moving forward.

Why is this? Thinking big is just one part of the equation. This missing piece in the jigsaw is a bias towards massive action. Big Dreams + Little Action = disappointment and frustration.

Thinking and dreaming big must match with the equal and equivalent amount of action for it to go anywhere. When you combine big thinking with massive action you will be surprised at how much you are capable of, once you tap into the power of momentum.

What stops most people from achieving their goals?

I’ve been reading Grant Cardone’s “The 10X Rule: The Only Difference Between Success and Failure” and in his view success comes from taking 10 times more action than you previously anticipated.

What stops most people from achieving a goal is underestimating the time, effort and energy involved in completing the project. They don’t spend enough time listing the steps required to succeed, the adversity they will need to overcome to push things through and the price they must pay to attain the goal.

If the number one sticking point in goal attainment is a lack of action then it’s obvious that the solution is in massive action. So what happens is they give up at the first sign of frustration or disappointment.

“Never reduce a target. Instead increase actions. When you start rethinking your targets, making up excuses, and letting yourself off the hook, you are giving up on your dreams.” – Grant Cardone

When I look back on my own life, anything I have ever achieved that was worthwhile did take an extraordinary amount of effort. Anytime I have ever coasted or done a “normal” amount of work, I would fall short of my target and feel the pain of frustration and disappointment which lead to reducing my targets.

In “The 10 X Rule” Cardone talks about his own failures in business and how he bounced back; “I committed to making this work by increasing my efforts 10 times. And as soon as I did that, everything started to change – immediately. I went back into the marketplace with the right estimation of effort and started seeing results. Instead of making two to three calls a day, I started doing 20 to 30”

Most people fail only because they are operating at the wrong degree of action. There are 4 degrees of action which you can choose from:

1. Do Nothing
2. Retreat
3. Take Normal Levels of Action
4. Take Massive Action

At the “do nothing” level people are just accepting what comes their way. They are not pushing themselves or motivated to improve any area of their lives.

Retreaters are those who have taken action, experienced some setbacks or failures and retreated back into “doing nothing”. Examples of this include “Most businesses fail anyway so I am going to give up”, “Marriages aren’t working out these days so I will stay single”, “Businesses aren’t employing so I am going to file for unemployment benefit”.

The third degree is normal levels of action which is usually considered adequate. Grant says this is the most dangerous level where most people blend in, never stand out and thus never achieve the real success they wanted.

Lastly there is massive action which Cardone states is our most natural state. This is where you burst forth with 10 times the action you previously anticipated. “The goal is to be seen, thought of and considered – in one way or another. Your only problem is obscurity not talent”.

Obscurity is your only problem not talent. I like that. I am sure you all know someone who is less capable than you but experiencing much more success than you are. Why? Because they are more known and fearlessly putting themselves “out there”. So which degree of action are you taking currently? And will you commit to taking 10x action?

“Regardless of which degree of action you operate in, they all require work in their own way.” – Grant Cardone

So why not set your goals and actions higher than you ever imagined because it is highly likely you are not only underestimating the time, energy and effort involved in your endeavour, you are also likely underestimating your own capabilities and potential. Set high goals and never stop fighting.

Share with us one goal you have for 2017, and how you plan on achieving it. Comment below so we can see!

We can’t help it. When we read an interview with a high flying, successful person, we secretly compare ourselves to them with our mind making little mental notes. Their lives seem perfect, and they seem so poised and confident. I wish I could be like that. Why do they seem to have it all, while I am struggling? When will things ever go my way?

For the longest time, I too believed in these popular myths of success, until I met several CEOs who became my mentors. When I asked each one of them what is the one biggest lesson they would like to share, their answers were unexpected, powerful and humbling.

These are the 5 powerful and humbling lessons they shared about success:

1. Nobody has Their Stuff Together

Just when you least expect it, an obstacle pops up, threatening to derail you from your goal. And sometimes, the bad news just keeps coming, which kicks you in the gut and you feel ready to give up. In comparison, successful people seem to be blazing trails of success. It almost seems unfair. While they appear to be picture perfect, where nothing can go wrong, the truth of it is this:

Nobody has their stuff together. We see these crowning moments of glory. But we don’t see the private, vulnerable moments behind the scenes. The sleepless nights worrying about what to do, where a series of wrong decisions resulted in people getting laid off. The endless meals alone in yet another soulless hotel room, with no one to share the burden with, because they don’t have the time to make a relationship work.

Obstacles and problems will always exist, no matter who you are. However, the challenges appearing to each of us is unique, and help us grow beyond the level we are at. A successful life is not about a lack of challenges, it’s about navigating and growing through the challenges so that we continue evolving to become the fullest potential of who we are.

2. Uncertainty Never Disappears

Brimming with confidence and well spoken, they always seem to know exactly what to say, and what to do in any situation. They seem to be the last people on earth to flail and feel vulnerable.

While on the surface they appear to be confident, the struggle with not knowing what to do plagues them as much as us. This can be the uncertainty of making a project work, because they have never done it before or lacking the necessary experience.

They can be worried that by taking this on, they might be biting off more than they can chew and experience massive failure and disastrous consequences. Nonetheless, the difference for them is despite their fears, they say yes and go ahead.

“Human spirit is the ability to face the uncertainty of the future with curiosity and optimism. It is the belief that problems can be solved, differences resolved. It is a type of confidence. And it is fragile. It can be blackened by fear and superstition.” – Bernard Beckett

3. Jump Before You Are Ready

Uncertainty and not knowing is a part of life. It never goes away. If you stay where you are, it feels safe and comfortable. But, it is a guarantee that you would not rise beyond where you are now if you don’t step out and make your move.

To take the leap of faith, your work through the uncertainty is the only way to grow. The fear of the unknown is not as scary as we make it out to be. All you have to do is to ask yourself “Do I believe I have what it takes to figure it out?” If your gut says yes, go for it.

4. It’s Not about External Motivation

Most successful people come with the traditional markers of success. Wealth. Status. A comfortable lifestyle. However, external motivation – the cars, the houses, the jewelry etc – can only motivate them so much.

Their motivation stems not from the outside – but from within themselves. It’s about their internal drive to be better thus building and expanding a grander vision of what they wish to create, and where they want to be.

That internal motivation is the driving force that pushes them through when things start to fall apart, because then it’s a battle within to overcome these setbacks and achieve their vision.

5. They Are Mental Ninja Masters

When everything that could go wrong, would go wrong, it’s natural to beat ourselves up. This negative feedback loop keeps replaying in our minds, and we start believing our negative self-talk, which threatens to spiral out of control and bring us down.

A few years ago, one of the CEOs I interviewed, Dave, was going through a particularly difficult time. Several major business deals fell through in quick succession. He emptied his life savings trying to keep things afloat, only for it to backfire and lost his life savings in the process.

He was faced with the real possibility of laying off hundreds of people at the company. Many lives were at stake here, and the pressure was on. He faltered, but only for a day.

He then rallied and continued to hustle. He hustled harder, stronger and faster than ever before. It was fascinating and impressive. What was his secret to bouncing back so fast from all the punches thrown at him?

He didn’t allow the negativity to control him. He controlled and directed his mind. Half the battle is with ourselves. We are often our own worst enemy with our negative self-talk.

Mastering control over your mind, instead of letting your mind control you is half the battle. Stop the negative self-talk when it happens. Redirect it towards positive action to achieve the outcome you desire.

“Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Ready For Your Next Step?

Success is not out of reach. All it takes is showing up each day and having the courage to take one small step towards the direction of your goals. Your new life of freedom and possibility awaits.

How will you make sure to achieve the success you are looking for? Please comment below and let us know!

You’ve all met a person who’s a loser. Some people like the word and some people don’t but who really cares. Losers exist so deal with it. Worse yet, you may be one without even knowing it. My job is not to shame you if you are a loser; my job is to inspire you to change.

What is a loser?

For the purpose of this blog post it’s someone who has done the following:

• Given up on life
• Wants to talk down other people’s dreams
• Get’s jealous over dumb stuff
• Has zero purpose or reason for living
• Doesn’t show love to the world
• Makes you feel demotivated and uninspired

What makes me qualified to talk about losers?

I was a loser, so I know what it’s like to be one intimately. I slept in and found it hard to face the day. I drank way too much alcohol to try and numb the pain. I didn’t do myself any favors with the opposite sex. I watched a lot of TV and ate the worst food that you could possibly consume.

I had no passion, no dream and no purpose in life. I was a deadbeat loser.

How are losers created?

No one is born a loser. Losers are created when a person experiences a major failure or hits rock bottom. We all have had this happen to us in life, but a loser is born when he or she can’t get back up again and allows circumstances to define their future.

Losers are created when they become overly negative and have nothing positive in their life. This mindset is created through a lack of gratitude and appreciation for what they do have. Selfishness becomes the dominant way of living and everyone else is the problem in their eyes.

Losers stop taking responsibility for their life and decide to do nothing.

Life can change in a moment when you make a better decision. It’s this decision-making ability that allows someone to go from being a loser to being a champion.

Here is what you should avoid if you want never to become a loser or stop being a loser:

1. The news

Those flashy headlines that steal your attention away from what matters are making you a loser. Most traditional news is exaggerated rubbish that makes people fear the world and fear each other. The news makes us all look at each like we’re terrorists. Choose love, not fear.

2. Bad dress

No one’s saying you need to wear Versace every day. Dressing sharp though demonstrates that you have respect for yourself and how you appear to others. Regardless of what most books say, first impressions count and how you physically appear is part of that. Swag it out.

3. Lack of self-control

Being in control is being disciplined. Losers let temptation lead them down a dark and weary road and then get robbed of all of their most valuable personality traits. Being in control is about having your mind in check. Your mind controls what you think, so you better master it.

When you have the chance to get smashed and drink too much, decide to have one glass of wine instead. When all your friends are complaining about their day and hurling abuse at each other, decide to leave the conversation or not follow their lead.

If someone cuts you off in traffic, avoid tooting your horn and brush it off like it’s nothing. The best way I can describe self-control is non- reactivity. It’s about not reacting to all the bad stuff that shows up every day. By practicing this habit, you avoid being a loser and take back control of the horsey’s reigns.

4. Too much time spent on the problem

If I had to describe business in two words, it would be “solving problems.”

Losers spend way too much time being pissed off by the problem rather than moving into the positive state of mind and getting on with building the solution. Focusing on the problem is generally done through storytelling. Losers tell made up stories to themselves and those around them about the problem.

This storytelling takes up a lot of time and sucks away all the energy that could be channeled into coming up with the solution. I like to use the 80/20 rule when it comes to solving a problem: spend 20% of your time focusing on the negative and 80% focusing on the positive.

5. Zero confidence

Having no confidence repels everyone away from you. Even during tough times, you have to remain confident and have faith in everything working at.

Losers don’t back themselves and are not confident. This then shows up in their passion and their results. They then mask this phenomenon by blaming, telling false stories and being angry.

“Not having confidence is a vicious cycle that becomes a catalyst in the disease that is losermanship (this is not a real word, I made it up and am confident you will find it acceptable)”

6. No purpose

What creates a loser more than anything is a lack of purpose. It doesn’t matter what it is; you have to have a reason for your life. Even if you haven’t exactly figured that out yet, you must have an interim purpose. Link each day to something that inspires you and helps others.

No one was born with a purpose; we all create one out of thin air based on our passion and confidence in who we are. Not having a driving force is depressing. This negative state of living makes us unhappy. Once you start being consistently unhappy, you pick up other negative elements like a magnet.

7. A belief that you deserve more

Losers think they should get more than they currently have. What you have is the result of the current action you’ve taken. You don’t deserve more unless you earn it and create value for someone or something. There are no shortcuts and you’re not about to get lucky pal! The government doesn’t owe you squat. Your workplace doesn’t owe you jack. Your friends don’t owe you anything.

If you don’t like where you’re at and what you have then make a change. Change happens when you decide to stop being a loser and take ownership for who you are and what you want to become.

8. Gambling instead of investing

Losers gamble and go to casinos or play the lottery. Losers bet the house on cryptocurrency because someone told them the price is going to skyrocket and they’re going to get rich. Losers think they’re smart when it comes to the game of luck. Losers play the short game which is based on winning quickly and a belief that they’re smarter than the average person.

You can avoid a degree in losermanship by playing the long game, getting educated, investing in what you know, diversifying your risk and learning from people who are smarter than you. Success, fame and money are not achieved overnight.

9. Being relentlessly selfish

Losers do the opposite of winners. Losers are relentlessly selfish and only care about themselves. They do not serve others and their model of the world is flawed. Trying to always get more for yourself takes away something from someone else.

Where you want to get to is trying to get more by giving more. Sounds counter-intuitive, but that’s how the universe works. Not everything is logical at first. Life can be a bit of a puzzle sometimes. That’s what makes it so fulfilling to solve.

10. Chasing material objects

Losers chase dumb, shiny objects that impress people who have no spine. A car made from a chunk of metal or a house made of bricks will never give you anything in the long term. Don’t be like a dog chasing a flashing frisbee because it lights up your eyes for a few brief moments.

Light up the world instead with your own light which will shine brightly when you discover who you are and how you can serve others.

11. Being obsessed with job titles

Losers think that made up labels matter. A label is something that is handed out like the dole cheque every fortnight. You don’t have to own any label if you don’t want to. Better yet, you can create whatever label you want for yourself.

***Final thought***

I believe that losermanship is created by an individual. I also believe we can change anything we want once we notice how we’re living. The purpose of this article is not to poke fun at losers or impress you with the word loser. The purpose of this article is to help you become self-aware of what you may be doing wrong or could improve on.

My goal in life is to inspire you to live with passion and do something meaningful with your life. I know you can do something awesome, so it’s time to show us all!

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

There’s this dude at the office. He’s fucking unstoppable.

His shit don’t stink and everything he touches turns to gold. At least that’s what I used to think.

Really, in reality, he’s just charismatic.

That’s how he got the cool job, the hot wifey and why everyone wants to be friends with him including me.

What does he do? Let’s delve a little deeper and discuss the eight things that lead to being charismatic:

1. Being confident baby!

This dude at work has swag. He backs himself even if he has no freaking idea what’s going to go down homey. In a business context, people that are confident are proven to be more trustworthy.

We trust confident people because it’s infectious. We want to work and be around confident people because it feels good. When something feels good, we do it, and do it lots!

My buddy at work walks into the room and people shake his hand because his presence changes the game. He also does these few things:

– He dresses confidently
– He pops his chest out just a fraction (not like the guy on the Bonds Singlet packet)
– He looks people in the eye

Out of these three, looking people in the eye is the hardest to do. To look into someone’s eye is the most vulnerable state you can put yourself in.

“The difference is that when you’re vulnerable, you connect with people better”

It also shows that you’ve got guts and allows you to enter their world. Okay, that’s wacky stuff and I may sound like I’ve read one too many “Power Of the Universe” type books. Take it or leave it chief.

2. Passion surrounds them. It pours out of their eyeballs!

Even the words I write demonstrate this. You can tell from everything I’m saying right now that passion pours out of me. I freaking love what I do and it shows even though you can’t see me or hear my voice. Okay, that’s a fraction creepy…enough about me.

This almighty bloke at work is charismatic because his values and beliefs are based on his passion. Passion is like a magnet according to science. When we see passion, it makes us start acting with more passion. You’re drawn to charisma in the same way because you want more of it.

There’s no point pretending you don’t like to be passionate because we all do. Sometimes, we just get lost and lose our passion for life or our career. That’s okay! None of us are perfect souls who don’t lose our way once in a while. I’m fucking lost more than I’m on track half the time.

Bottom-line: charismatic people are surrounded by passion. I don’t care if it’s collecting matchsticks or building sand castles – find something to get excited about and then show your passion for it.

3. They’re not vain: selfies are not their highest priority.

This charismatic chappy at work doesn’t spend half his days taking selfies of himself and then posting it on social media.

He doesn’t take photos of his food and then post it on social – he just eats it. He’d rather jump off a bridge than be a pretentious snob who’s insecure and has an inflated ego to compensate.

“The number one sign of a pretentious person vs a charismatic person is that they take credit for things they didn’t do”

Or they make things sound ten times bigger than they actually are in reality. Don’t fall for this trap young Indiana Jones. You’re better than that!

4. Expressing yourself through great stories

Storytelling is one of the many traits a charismatic person has. If you listen closely to their stories, you’ll notice they use strong phrases like “I know X to be true” instead of phrases like “I think,” or “I hope” which sounds weak.

Through stories, you can be: funny, vulnerable and share embarrassing moments. That’s what charismatic people do and they draw everyone in through their stories. As a side note, their stories don’t go on forever and they know how to get to the point.

Become a charismatic poet through stories about your experiences. Educate and inspire people around you and you’ll be acting charismatic by default.

5. Make other people feel comfortable around you

Not everyone is a hero and is comfortable being charismatic and confident. You can demonstrate charisma by learning to make others feel relaxed around you. Make other people the center of attention and let them feel special. There’s a subtle difference between charisma and hogging the conversation with your own bombastic, overpowering, unnecessary and selfish talk.

Back down; you’re not that big of a deal. Once you do that, you’ll have entered the universe of charisma.

6. A clear purpose and vision. In other words, they know why.

Part of what makes up the DNA of a charismatic person is their purpose or vision for their life. Quite simply, they know what they’re on this planet to do. They have a goal, it’s measurable, and they’ll stop at nothing until they achieve it.

To be in this state requires a certain sort of self-confidence that charismatic people have in spades. People seem to rally around a person who knows their purpose.

You can’t do anything and be motivated unless you know why. Without a why you’ll never build up enough momentum to reach any sort of peak performance. Mediocrity happens to us when we give up too easily. When we start a new pursuit for 4 weeks and then give up.

Map the seven seas of why you exist. Do a heap of self-reflection if you need to, to find this vision and bring it to the surface.

7. They look approachable

Most people look like they’re zombies when you walk past them and they almost look like they’re going to explode if you dare talk to them. That’s not charisma pal!

That unapproachable zombie look is called being scared, fearful and afraid due to a lack of self-awareness and a lack of self-improvement. It’s not the end of the world and it can be turned around.

The difference with charismatic people is one little, tiny thing: they smile. All you have to do is change one little thing – smile a bit more. Smiling is contagious and it makes people feel confident. It also makes you feel freaking amazing too!

8. They give more than anyone else and expect jack in return

This last one is the toughest trait of charismatic people. It sounds incredibly difficult and that’s because it is. We all have our own selfish desires that make us feel good, although only for a moment.

Charismatic people wow everyone around them by always going above and beyond to give. They either give time, money, knowledge or a listening ear to those who need it. The crazy, passionate, charismatic people even combine several of these to produce an outcome that can only be described as extraordinary.

Many of us do in fact give; the challenge is we expect something back. Worse, we even complain when we do an honorable act and get nothing in return. This is not how to play the game of life. This selfish behavior will make you very unhappy until you cut it the hell out!

“The secret to living is giving ” Tony Robbins

So let’s go over this one more time boss. To harness the superpower of giving that leads to charisma you must:

– Be prepared to give more than anybody else
– Expect nothing in return
– Ensure your own foolish and selfish desires are not front of mind every day

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Everyone has dreams. We all want to make something of ourselves yet it’s only a tiny percentage of people ever follow through. The self-help world encourages us to “Think Big”, “Follow Your Passions”, “Live as if there was no such thing as failure” and it usually just leads to keeping people stuck in a dream state, wishing, hoping and fantasizing yet never actually moving forward.

Why is this? Thinking big is just one part of the equation. This missing piece in the jigsaw is a bias towards massive action. Big Dreams + Little Action = disappointment and frustration.

Thinking and dreaming big must match with the equal and equivalent amount of action for it to go anywhere. When you combine big thinking with massive action you will be surprised at how much you are capable of, once you tap into the power of momentum.

What stops most people from achieving their goals?

I’ve been reading Grant Cardone’s “The 10X Rule: The Only Difference Between Success and Failure” and in his view success comes from taking 10 times more action than you previously anticipated.

What stops most people from achieving a goal is underestimating the time, effort and energy involved in completing the project. They don’t spend enough time listing the steps required to succeed, the adversity they will need to overcome to push things through and the price they must pay to attain the goal.

If the number one sticking point in goal attainment is a lack of action then it’s obvious that the solution is in massive action. So what happens is they give up at the first sign of frustration or disappointment.

“Never reduce a target. Instead increase actions. When you start rethinking your targets, making up excuses, and letting yourself off the hook, you are giving up on your dreams.” – Grant Cardone

When I look back on my own life, anything I have ever achieved that was worthwhile did take an extraordinary amount of effort. Anytime I have ever coasted or done a “normal” amount of work, I would fall short of my target and feel the pain of frustration and disappointment which lead to reducing my targets.

In “The 10 X Rule” Cardone talks about his own failures in business and how he bounced back; “I committed to making this work by increasing my efforts 10 times. And as soon as I did that, everything started to change – immediately. I went back into the marketplace with the right estimation of effort and started seeing results. Instead of making two to three calls a day, I started doing 20 to 30”

Most people fail only because they are operating at the wrong degree of action. There are 4 degrees of action which you can choose from:

1. Do Nothing
2. Retreat
3. Take Normal Levels of Action
4. Take Massive Action

At the “do nothing” level people are just accepting what comes their way. They are not pushing themselves or motivated to improve any area of their lives.

Retreaters are those who have taken action, experienced some setbacks or failures and retreated back into “doing nothing”. Examples of this include “Most businesses fail anyway so I am going to give up”, “Marriages aren’t working out these days so I will stay single”, “Businesses aren’t employing so I am going to file for unemployment benefit”.

The third degree is normal levels of action which is usually considered adequate. Grant says this is the most dangerous level where most people blend in, never stand out and thus never achieve the real success they wanted.

Lastly there is massive action which Cardone states is our most natural state. This is where you burst forth with 10 times the action you previously anticipated. “The goal is to be seen, thought of and considered – in one way or another. Your only problem is obscurity not talent”.

Obscurity is your only problem not talent. I like that. I am sure you all know someone who is less capable than you but experiencing much more success than you are. Why? Because they are more known and fearlessly putting themselves “out there”. So which degree of action are you taking currently? And will you commit to taking 10x action?

“Regardless of which degree of action you operate in, they all require work in their own way.” – Grant Cardone

So why not set your goals and actions higher than you ever imagined because it is highly likely you are not only underestimating the time, energy and effort involved in your endeavour, you are also likely underestimating your own capabilities and potential. Set high goals and never stop fighting.

Share with us one goal you have for 2017, and how you plan on achieving it. Comment below so we can see!

We can’t help it. When we read an interview with a high flying, successful person, we secretly compare ourselves to them with our mind making little mental notes. Their lives seem perfect, and they seem so poised and confident. I wish I could be like that. Why do they seem to have it all, while I am struggling? When will things ever go my way?

For the longest time, I too believed in these popular myths of success, until I met several CEOs who became my mentors. When I asked each one of them what is the one biggest lesson they would like to share, their answers were unexpected, powerful and humbling.

These are the 5 powerful and humbling lessons they shared about success:

1. Nobody has Their Stuff Together

Just when you least expect it, an obstacle pops up, threatening to derail you from your goal. And sometimes, the bad news just keeps coming, which kicks you in the gut and you feel ready to give up. In comparison, successful people seem to be blazing trails of success. It almost seems unfair. While they appear to be picture perfect, where nothing can go wrong, the truth of it is this:

Nobody has their stuff together. We see these crowning moments of glory. But we don’t see the private, vulnerable moments behind the scenes. The sleepless nights worrying about what to do, where a series of wrong decisions resulted in people getting laid off. The endless meals alone in yet another soulless hotel room, with no one to share the burden with, because they don’t have the time to make a relationship work.

Obstacles and problems will always exist, no matter who you are. However, the challenges appearing to each of us is unique, and help us grow beyond the level we are at. A successful life is not about a lack of challenges, it’s about navigating and growing through the challenges so that we continue evolving to become the fullest potential of who we are.

2. Uncertainty Never Disappears

Brimming with confidence and well spoken, they always seem to know exactly what to say, and what to do in any situation. They seem to be the last people on earth to flail and feel vulnerable.

While on the surface they appear to be confident, the struggle with not knowing what to do plagues them as much as us. This can be the uncertainty of making a project work, because they have never done it before or lacking the necessary experience.

They can be worried that by taking this on, they might be biting off more than they can chew and experience massive failure and disastrous consequences. Nonetheless, the difference for them is despite their fears, they say yes and go ahead.

“Human spirit is the ability to face the uncertainty of the future with curiosity and optimism. It is the belief that problems can be solved, differences resolved. It is a type of confidence. And it is fragile. It can be blackened by fear and superstition.” – Bernard Beckett

3. Jump Before You Are Ready

Uncertainty and not knowing is a part of life. It never goes away. If you stay where you are, it feels safe and comfortable. But, it is a guarantee that you would not rise beyond where you are now if you don’t step out and make your move.

To take the leap of faith, your work through the uncertainty is the only way to grow. The fear of the unknown is not as scary as we make it out to be. All you have to do is to ask yourself “Do I believe I have what it takes to figure it out?” If your gut says yes, go for it.

4. It’s Not about External Motivation

Most successful people come with the traditional markers of success. Wealth. Status. A comfortable lifestyle. However, external motivation – the cars, the houses, the jewelry etc – can only motivate them so much.

Their motivation stems not from the outside – but from within themselves. It’s about their internal drive to be better thus building and expanding a grander vision of what they wish to create, and where they want to be.

That internal motivation is the driving force that pushes them through when things start to fall apart, because then it’s a battle within to overcome these setbacks and achieve their vision.

5. They Are Mental Ninja Masters

When everything that could go wrong, would go wrong, it’s natural to beat ourselves up. This negative feedback loop keeps replaying in our minds, and we start believing our negative self-talk, which threatens to spiral out of control and bring us down.

A few years ago, one of the CEOs I interviewed, Dave, was going through a particularly difficult time. Several major business deals fell through in quick succession. He emptied his life savings trying to keep things afloat, only for it to backfire and lost his life savings in the process.

He was faced with the real possibility of laying off hundreds of people at the company. Many lives were at stake here, and the pressure was on. He faltered, but only for a day.

He then rallied and continued to hustle. He hustled harder, stronger and faster than ever before. It was fascinating and impressive. What was his secret to bouncing back so fast from all the punches thrown at him?

He didn’t allow the negativity to control him. He controlled and directed his mind. Half the battle is with ourselves. We are often our own worst enemy with our negative self-talk.

Mastering control over your mind, instead of letting your mind control you is half the battle. Stop the negative self-talk when it happens. Redirect it towards positive action to achieve the outcome you desire.

“Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Ready For Your Next Step?

Success is not out of reach. All it takes is showing up each day and having the courage to take one small step towards the direction of your goals. Your new life of freedom and possibility awaits.

How will you make sure to achieve the success you are looking for? Please comment below and let us know!

You’ve all met a person who’s a loser. Some people like the word and some people don’t but who really cares. Losers exist so deal with it. Worse yet, you may be one without even knowing it. My job is not to shame you if you are a loser; my job is to inspire you to change.

What is a loser?

For the purpose of this blog post it’s someone who has done the following:

• Given up on life
• Wants to talk down other people’s dreams
• Get’s jealous over dumb stuff
• Has zero purpose or reason for living
• Doesn’t show love to the world
• Makes you feel demotivated and uninspired

What makes me qualified to talk about losers?

I was a loser, so I know what it’s like to be one intimately. I slept in and found it hard to face the day. I drank way too much alcohol to try and numb the pain. I didn’t do myself any favors with the opposite sex. I watched a lot of TV and ate the worst food that you could possibly consume.

I had no passion, no dream and no purpose in life. I was a deadbeat loser.

How are losers created?

No one is born a loser. Losers are created when a person experiences a major failure or hits rock bottom. We all have had this happen to us in life, but a loser is born when he or she can’t get back up again and allows circumstances to define their future.

Losers are created when they become overly negative and have nothing positive in their life. This mindset is created through a lack of gratitude and appreciation for what they do have. Selfishness becomes the dominant way of living and everyone else is the problem in their eyes.

Losers stop taking responsibility for their life and decide to do nothing.

Life can change in a moment when you make a better decision. It’s this decision-making ability that allows someone to go from being a loser to being a champion.

Here is what you should avoid if you want never to become a loser or stop being a loser:

1. The news

Those flashy headlines that steal your attention away from what matters are making you a loser. Most traditional news is exaggerated rubbish that makes people fear the world and fear each other. The news makes us all look at each like we’re terrorists. Choose love, not fear.

2. Bad dress

No one’s saying you need to wear Versace every day. Dressing sharp though demonstrates that you have respect for yourself and how you appear to others. Regardless of what most books say, first impressions count and how you physically appear is part of that. Swag it out.

3. Lack of self-control

Being in control is being disciplined. Losers let temptation lead them down a dark and weary road and then get robbed of all of their most valuable personality traits. Being in control is about having your mind in check. Your mind controls what you think, so you better master it.

When you have the chance to get smashed and drink too much, decide to have one glass of wine instead. When all your friends are complaining about their day and hurling abuse at each other, decide to leave the conversation or not follow their lead.

If someone cuts you off in traffic, avoid tooting your horn and brush it off like it’s nothing. The best way I can describe self-control is non- reactivity. It’s about not reacting to all the bad stuff that shows up every day. By practicing this habit, you avoid being a loser and take back control of the horsey’s reigns.

4. Too much time spent on the problem

If I had to describe business in two words, it would be “solving problems.”

Losers spend way too much time being pissed off by the problem rather than moving into the positive state of mind and getting on with building the solution. Focusing on the problem is generally done through storytelling. Losers tell made up stories to themselves and those around them about the problem.

This storytelling takes up a lot of time and sucks away all the energy that could be channeled into coming up with the solution. I like to use the 80/20 rule when it comes to solving a problem: spend 20% of your time focusing on the negative and 80% focusing on the positive.

5. Zero confidence

Having no confidence repels everyone away from you. Even during tough times, you have to remain confident and have faith in everything working at.

Losers don’t back themselves and are not confident. This then shows up in their passion and their results. They then mask this phenomenon by blaming, telling false stories and being angry.

“Not having confidence is a vicious cycle that becomes a catalyst in the disease that is losermanship (this is not a real word, I made it up and am confident you will find it acceptable)”

6. No purpose

What creates a loser more than anything is a lack of purpose. It doesn’t matter what it is; you have to have a reason for your life. Even if you haven’t exactly figured that out yet, you must have an interim purpose. Link each day to something that inspires you and helps others.

No one was born with a purpose; we all create one out of thin air based on our passion and confidence in who we are. Not having a driving force is depressing. This negative state of living makes us unhappy. Once you start being consistently unhappy, you pick up other negative elements like a magnet.

7. A belief that you deserve more

Losers think they should get more than they currently have. What you have is the result of the current action you’ve taken. You don’t deserve more unless you earn it and create value for someone or something. There are no shortcuts and you’re not about to get lucky pal! The government doesn’t owe you squat. Your workplace doesn’t owe you jack. Your friends don’t owe you anything.

If you don’t like where you’re at and what you have then make a change. Change happens when you decide to stop being a loser and take ownership for who you are and what you want to become.

8. Gambling instead of investing

Losers gamble and go to casinos or play the lottery. Losers bet the house on cryptocurrency because someone told them the price is going to skyrocket and they’re going to get rich. Losers think they’re smart when it comes to the game of luck. Losers play the short game which is based on winning quickly and a belief that they’re smarter than the average person.

You can avoid a degree in losermanship by playing the long game, getting educated, investing in what you know, diversifying your risk and learning from people who are smarter than you. Success, fame and money are not achieved overnight.

9. Being relentlessly selfish

Losers do the opposite of winners. Losers are relentlessly selfish and only care about themselves. They do not serve others and their model of the world is flawed. Trying to always get more for yourself takes away something from someone else.

Where you want to get to is trying to get more by giving more. Sounds counter-intuitive, but that’s how the universe works. Not everything is logical at first. Life can be a bit of a puzzle sometimes. That’s what makes it so fulfilling to solve.

10. Chasing material objects

Losers chase dumb, shiny objects that impress people who have no spine. A car made from a chunk of metal or a house made of bricks will never give you anything in the long term. Don’t be like a dog chasing a flashing frisbee because it lights up your eyes for a few brief moments.

Light up the world instead with your own light which will shine brightly when you discover who you are and how you can serve others.

11. Being obsessed with job titles

Losers think that made up labels matter. A label is something that is handed out like the dole cheque every fortnight. You don’t have to own any label if you don’t want to. Better yet, you can create whatever label you want for yourself.

***Final thought***

I believe that losermanship is created by an individual. I also believe we can change anything we want once we notice how we’re living. The purpose of this article is not to poke fun at losers or impress you with the word loser. The purpose of this article is to help you become self-aware of what you may be doing wrong or could improve on.

My goal in life is to inspire you to live with passion and do something meaningful with your life. I know you can do something awesome, so it’s time to show us all!

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net