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How To Overcome Nervousness – Hollywood’s Best Kept Secret

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Nervousness can be used to our advantage or our detriment. It’s a human condition that everyone experiences at some moment in their life. I used to think that being nervous meant I wasn’t good enough at something.

It’s also a condition that can be forgotten about in highly successful individuals or celebrities. As I researched and consumed interviews from these two types of people, I realised that more than 80% of them still get nervous.

What I realised was that they had found ways to be appreciative of their nervousness and to reframe the sensation into a positive experience.

Below are the ten ways to deal with nervousness before any presentation, speech, performance, or business pitch:

1. Be happy you’re out of your comfort zone

Being nervous usually means you’re out of your comfort zone. This is an awesome place to operate your life from, and it will see you excel past your peers. The more you get into this state, the bigger the achievements are that you can obtain in your field of excellence.

From now on, reframe your states of nervousness to be linked to feelings of happiness. Hardwire the feelings of nervousness to your basic human need to grow, and then link all of this to your vision / purpose. By doing this, you will become unstoppable!

2. Remember it’s extra energy so use it for good

Nervousness in my mind is extra energy that can be utilized for good or for evil. It can make you more aware and help boost your senses.

I remember hearing Jessie J say that everyone she knows get’s nervous (including her) and that she has learned over the years to use the energy to help her performance. This is the secret sauce of many pop stars and Hollywood actors.

For some reason, I used to think that these top performers didn’t get nervous because they just magically grew out of it and it went away. This is not true. Some don’t get nervous, but the majority still do.

3. Concentrate on delivering value (not on yourself)

A recurring theme in almost every article I write is the simple power of giving. The reason it’s easy for us to get nervous before a big performance or speech is that we are focusing on ourselves. We are focusing on what the effects are going to be on us and what people might think.

Fundamentally, when we shift away from this default way of operating and make our priority those we serve, our nervousness changes shape.

In blogging, early on, I used to by default focus on how I sounded and what people thought of me. This was a natural human reaction that I did subconsciously even though I knew better. The shift for me happened when I consciously forgot about myself and committed to delivering everything I have with no stone left unturned.

Regardless of how I am perceived, good or bad, my goal is to go above and beyond people’s expectations and to serve an audience. As I took this habit from my blogging to public speaking, I found that a good proportion of my nervousness disappeared.

Instead, my new focus was on trying to teach one new thing, or inspire one person through a new idea, every time I spoke in front of an audience. I still have a long way to go, but public speaking is definitely high on the nervousness radar for many.

When I made the bold move to put my name up in lights in front of tens of thousands of my work colleagues and share my entrepreneur story, I opened the door for unwanted opinions and judgment.

It made me nervous about what could happen. Rather than dwell on all the fearful thoughts I was having, I just had faith in what I stood for and who I’ve become and shared everything I had learned. It’s no surprise that there were 1% of naysayers (expected), and the other 99% were highly supportive.

Dig deep and use your experience to draw out nuggets of gold for those who have given up their time to listen to you. What might seem like a meaningless life lesson to you, could be the one strategy that someone else needs to go on and be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company.

None of your life experience is meaningless, and you should be relentless in sharing it for the benefit of others. Social media makes this so easy to do so you have no excuse not to follow through.

4. Get in the pocket first

Nervousness can often begin at the start of a situation and then once you’re into the flow of delivering your performance – whatever that might be – it goes away. Expect that the first few minutes of a nervous experience might be uncomfortable, and then remember, once you get into delivering your content and you’re in the pocket, the nervousness will subside.

The audience can be a great way to get into the pocket. Use their energy to focus deep on your underlying passion that is driving you to do something that brings on this nervousness.

As you get further through the nervous experience, you will find yourself naturally fall into the pocket. It’s at that moment that your final goal should be to focus on how you can educate or help your audience.

5. Try this mindfulness trick

In a recent sales training session that I completed, I learned a very easy trick that you can use before you go into a nervous situation. What you need to do is before you are due to begin the nervous event, focus on three sounds that you can hear in the environment where you are.

By doing this exercise, you will bring your mind out of your anxious future and back into the present where you can control your experience. Five minutes of an app like “Headspace” or “Calm” can also have a similar effect too.

6. Get into an unstoppable posture

What if you were like the person you aspire to be like and you were unstoppable like them? Well, you can be. The mind is easy to manipulate so all you need to do is mimic the posture of the way this person you’re thinking of would act if they were doing the same activity you are about to do.

Stand tall, believe you are on the same level as this person and hold your head up. Do a few power poses and act as if you have more success than anyone around you. Act as if you are the big shot that you one-day hope to be. You’ll be surprised how this will positively affect your nervousness.

7. Breathe deeply and slowly

When you’re nervous, your breathing typically starts to speed up. This adjustment in breath will only make you feel more nervous and potentially bring on a panic attack.

Take a few deep breaths from your belly, hold each one, and then slowly breathe out. Deep breaths will help relax you and make the nervousness manageable.

8. Don’t let sugar or caffeine take you off course

If you’re already nervous, then caffeine and sugar will only make the issue worse. These two stimulants can play havoc on a nervous mind and make you feel more uneasy. Drinking water before a nervous event is a much better strategy that will keep you hydrated and make your throat moist.

You’ll notice in an office environment that some people sit in their chair and have a hand or leg shaking for extended periods of time. This can often be caused by too much sugar or caffeine. I noticed since giving up both substances that I became much calmer in high pressure, nervous situations.

9. Prepare in advance

Often when we are nervous about a situation, it’s because we haven’t adequately prepared, and our brain knows it. When we know what we are doing back the front, we are less likely to be nervous. So before a big moment where you know you will be nervous, anchor yourself by knowing your content, conversation, or audience really well.

The aim is not to practice so you’re perfect, the aim is to know how the situation is going to play out and have a plan. You can always move away from your plan in the moment, but if you don’t have one, then you set yourself up for disaster.

10. Try a workout

Exercise can be very effective at releasing endorphins that help to relax the body. Prior to a nervous event, you can try and do a forty-five-minute workout to get the blood pumping and take your mind off things.

Many experts claim that exercise is the best-known cure for nervousness so try it for yourself.

“Like most things in life, a positive mindset will get you through any challenge that presents itself”

***Final Thought***

So that’s the basics of how to overcome nervousness. Remember it’s completely natural to be nervous and there is a hidden power in the sensation if you will reframe your mind to look at the condition as positive.

Uncomfortable situations have a lot to do with how you’re thinking about them and less to do with any magical medical condition that you can take a quick fix tablet for.

Wish me luck as I prepare to leave the amateur round of Toastmasters and deliver a highly prepared speech. I’m sure I will be nervous, but I know I’m going to take my own advice and use the energy to motivate me towards my goal to inspire others through entrepreneurship and personal development.

How do you overcome nervousness? Are there any situations where it cripples you? Let me know in the comments section below or on my website timdenning.net and my Facebook. 
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Success Advice

Why Efficiency is Overrated (And How to Actually Get Things Done)

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Image Credit: Addicted2success

If you look at someone like Tim Ferriss, you might assume he is a hyper-productive, super-optimized efficiency machine. After all, he authored The 4-Hour Workweek and built a massive empire around deconstructing world-class performance.

But according to Ferriss, if you were to act as a fly on the wall in his house, he would often look like he is “doing a whole lot of nothing” or flailing like a “drowning monkey.”

The truth is, Ferriss isn’t obsessed with efficiency. He is obsessed with effectiveness. And there is a massive difference between the two.

In a recent deep-dive interview, Ferriss broke down how he structures his life, why he relies on “mini-retirements” to prevent burnout, and the exact protocols he uses to pull himself out of a low mood.

Efficiency vs. Effectiveness: The Ultimate Trap

Most people are trapped in the default mode of the universe: productivity theater. They do things that pass as productive to themselves and others (“Look at how busy I am!”), but they aren’t actually moving the needle.

  • Effectiveness is what you do.
  • Efficiency is how you do it.

As Ferriss explains, doing something well does not make it important. If you choose the wrong task and execute it flawlessly, you have wasted your time. It is far better to choose the absolute highest-leverage task (the “lead domino” that knocks over everything else) and execute it at a B-minus level than to efficiently accomplish tasks that don’t matter.

“If you’re running a marathon, you’re not going to take a taxi from point A to point B. Sure, that’ll be efficient, but that sort of defeats the purpose of the whole exercise,” Ferriss says.

How to Choose the Right Projects (The “Successful Failure” Method)

If what you work on is more important than how you work on it, how do you choose what to tackle? Ferriss uses a very specific filter for evaluating 3-to-6-month projects: “Can I succeed even if I fail?”

When evaluating opportunities, he chooses the projects that will allow him to develop rare skills or deepen valuable relationships, regardless of the external outcome.

When he launched his podcast in 2014, people told him it was too late. But he didn’t care about immediate external success; he used the podcast as a tool to reduce his verbal ticks, improve his interviewing skills for future books, and build deeper relationships with friends. Even if the podcast had “failed” commercially, he would have succeeded in leveling up his personal operating system.

The Architecture of a High-Leverage Day

Ferriss doesn’t rigidly structure every minute of his day. Instead, he focuses on a weekly architecture. By setting rigid days for specific tasks (e.g., all team calls on Tuesdays, all recordings on Mondays and Fridays), he creates a scaffolding that absorbs the chaos of daily life.

When it comes to his daily routine, he follows two main rules:

  1. Do Not Rush the First Hour: If he feels rushed in the morning, he will feel rushed all day.
  2. State, Story, Strategy: To change his mindset, he starts with his physical state. He uses a 3-to-5-minute cold plunge immediately upon waking to release norepinephrine, followed by a hot tub for hyper-dilation. This state change creates a more enabling internal “story,” which allows him to formulate a better “strategy” for the day.

“If you can single-task for two to three hours a day… you’re going to be ahead of 90% of the population,” Ferriss advises.

Managing Low Mood and Hypervigilance

Even top performers battle anxiety, rumination, and low mood. Ferriss refers to his mind as a “border collie”—if you leave it inside too long, it will chew the couch.

To prevent depressive spirals, Ferriss relies on a few non-negotiable protocols:

  • Prophylactic Scheduling: An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Ferriss schedules regular group dinners with friends and multiple week-long group trips a year to ensure he always has something to look forward to.
  • Identity Diversification: If your podcast, startup, or job is the sole barometer of your self-worth, you are incredibly vulnerable. Ferriss diversifies his identity through rock climbing, archery, writing, and investing. If his business has a terrible week but he hits a PR in the gym, his overall week is still a win.
  • Protecting Sleep: Ferriss notes that his low moods are almost always preceded by compromised sleep and excessive caffeine intake.

Beware the “High Achiever Complex”

When operating in a permissionless environment (where you can work whenever and wherever you want), the biggest risk is that you will end up working all the time.

Ferriss combats this by taking mini-retirements—scheduling 3 to 4 weeks where he is entirely offline.

“If you do that, you have to set up systems and policies that will persist after you return,” Ferriss explains. If your business requires your constant input, it is broken. Stepping away forces you to build systems that scale, ultimately saving you from your own desire to constantly be in control.

In the end, you are going to die with items left on your to-do list. Stop trying to efficiently clear the deck, and start focusing on the few critical actions that actually make you feel alive.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Tim Ferriss 11 years ago:

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How to Achieve Massive Success Without Crushing Your Soul

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Image Credit: Addicted2success

Most highly ambitious people suffer from a dangerous illusion: the belief that if they can just achieve one more milestone—a funding round, a promotion, an exit—they will finally feel like they are enough.

Entrepreneurs and leaders will sacrifice their sleep, relationships, and sanity to reach that distant horizon. But when the big payday or the massive accolade finally arrives, a terrifying reality sets in: nothing changes. The external world shifted, but the internal emptiness remained. Trying to find internal validation through external achievement is like drinking saltwater to quench your thirst; it seems like it will work, but it only leaves you thirstier.

High achievers are always playing two games in parallel:

  1. The External Game: Your career, your income, your accolades, and your status.
  2. The Internal Game: Your relationship with yourself, your peace, and your self-worth.

You can have white-hot ambition, make incredible money, and build a meaningful legacy without burning out. But to win without crushing your soul, you must master metacognition—the ability to reflect on and control your own thinking.

Here are three profound internal shifts you must make to beat high achiever burnout and build a life you actually enjoy.

1. Fire Your Internal Coach

Most ambitious people are driven by a ruthless inner monologue. This internal “coach” constantly whispers that your value is strictly tied to your performance. If you fail, you are worthless.

Many high achievers justify this abusive inner voice. They believe it gives them their edge and keeps them motivated. But if you step back and truly observe that voice, you will notice something profound: your inner critic rarely offers actionable solutions or brilliant ideas. It only offers fear.

That toxic internal coach is simply your own fear incarnated—fear of failure, fear of rejection, and fear of not being enough. Worse, this doesn’t just hurt you. When you operate from a place of self-loathing and fear, you project that negativity onto your team, your business partners, and your family.

You cannot cultivate healthy relationships with others if your relationship with yourself is toxic. To reach the next level of leadership, you must fire that coach. Give yourself permission to stop beating yourself up, and consciously shift from being your own harshest critic to being your strongest ally.

2. Pull the Nails Out of Your Head

Imagine a person complaining about a blinding, chronic headache while completely ignoring the obvious iron nail sticking out of their forehead.

In business and in life, we all accumulate metaphorical nails. Your nail is the obvious problem you are actively avoiding. It might be a co-founder relationship that has turned toxic. It might be a failing product line you are too stubborn to cut. It might be a destructive personal habit, or a deep-seated trauma you have refused to address.

We leave these nails in our heads for one simple reason: pulling them out hurts.

To reach the next peak of success, you have to realize that growth is not a straight upward line. To get off a stagnant plateau, you must first traverse a valley. If you fire a toxic client, you will face temporary financial stress. If you quit a bad habit, you will face temporary discomfort.

Something has to get worse before it gets better. But everything you truly want is on the other side of that temporary valley. Facing your fears and pulling out the nails is a superpower. Endure the short-term pain, and watch how fast you elevate once you are finally free of the friction.

3. Trust Your Second Voice

The voice of fear and criticism is not the only voice in your head. You have a second voice—your intuition.

Unlike your inner critic, your intuition does not speak through panic or fear; it speaks through energy. Energy is the language of your true ambition.

When you think about a project you feel obligated to do out of societal pressure, your energy lags. You feel a heavy sense of dread. But when you think about an idea you are secretly terrified of but deeply passionate about, your energy spikes. You feel electricity.

In almost every major business or life decision, you already know the answer. Your intuition has already told you what to do; your hesitation is simply a negotiation with your fear.

How do you conquer that fear? Write it down. Fears are incredibly dangerous when they lurk as nebulous clouds in your subconscious. When you put them on paper, they lose their paralyzing power. They cease to be monsters and simply become standard problems to be solved. And as an entrepreneur, you are an expert at solving problems.

Stop Waiting for the Destination

It is easy to look at the grind of building a business and think, “I’ll be happy when I finally sell this company,” or “I’ll relax when we hit $10 million in ARR.”

But the point of the journey is not the destination. The point of the flight is not simply to land; it is to experience the magic of being in the air.

Stop postponing your happiness for a future that is not guaranteed. Fire your toxic internal coach, do the hard work of pulling out your nails, and follow the energy of your intuition. You have already arrived. You are living in the “good old days” right now—make sure you are actually present enough to enjoy them.

Here is a great speech by Graham Weaver about How to Win Without Crushing Your Soul

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Why Your Morning Routine Needs a Document System, Not Just a To-Do List

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Image Credit: Addicted2success

Most morning routines are built around a mindset. A journal entry, a cold shower, ten minutes of stretching, or a fixed order for coffee and email, each one designed to start the day with focus. What almost never makes that list is the paperwork already sitting in your inbox from yesterday: the contract still needing a signature, the invoice a client asked you to resend, the intake form HR needs before nine o’clock.

A checklist can remind you these tasks exist, but it cannot tell you where the file lives, what format it needs to be in, or how many versions sit on your desktop already. That gap is why a document system matters more than one more app for tracking tasks.

The Piece Most Routines Skip

A to-do list can capture a single line such as send the signed lease, but the real work behind that line is gathering three or four separate files into one place first. A simple habit handles this well: before opening email, pull yesterday’s scans, forwarded attachments, and signed pages together into one working file. Open a PDF combiner to merge those pieces into a single document, and the visible task, actually sending the file, only takes as long as it should.

This is not just about signatures or contracts. Recurring items such as monthly reports, vendor invoices, and reference documents pile up the same way, and a five-minute pass each morning keeps them from becoming a bigger cleanup later in the week.

This is not a small pocket of wasted time either. The most recent Bureau of Labor Statistics time use data groups tasks like filling out paperwork together with other household management activities such as cooking and yard work, and finds that adults spend close to two hours a day on that broader category. A five-minute document habit each morning is a modest trade against that total, and it moves the drag to the start of the day instead of letting it bleed into everything after.

A Three-Layer System That Fits in Fifteen Minutes

A working system for morning paperwork does not need folders inside folders. Three layers cover almost everything:

  • Needs action today: Anything someone is waiting on, like a contract to sign or a form due before noon, gets handled first.
  • Reference only: Files you might need to check but do not have to touch, such as a signed agreement from last month, stay in a folder you can search instead of one you have to scroll through.
  • Archive: Anything finished and no longer active moves out of daily view completely, so it stops competing for attention with today’s work.

These three buckets take less time to sort into than most people spend deciding what to have for breakfast.

Three Small Habits That Make It Stick

None of this needs new software training or a rebuilt inbox. A few small habits carry most of the weight.

  • Keep one working file: Combine incoming pages into a single document each morning instead of juggling several attachments across separate emails.
  • Check who needs access, not just who has the file: Confirm the person waiting on a document (a client, a coworker, a new hire) can open it under their own account, since being able to share a PDF on any device matters more than which laptop or phone you used to finish it.
  • Close the loop by noon: Move anything finished into reference or archive so tomorrow’s list starts smaller instead of longer.

Each habit takes under a minute on its own, and together they keep paperwork from stacking up into a Friday-afternoon problem.

Different Roles, Same Morning Problem

The specifics change by job, but the underlying gap stays the same across roles.

Freelancers often start the day with three or four client threads open at once, each with its own estimate, contract, or invoice version, and a quick merge each morning keeps those from scattering across a downloads folder.

HR staff run into a version of the same problem multiplied across every new hire moving through onboarding at the same time, since offer letters, tax forms, and identification copies all need to land in one file before anything gets filed.

Designers hit it from another angle: client feedback often arrives as a photo of a printed mockup or a screenshot of a marked-up page, and turning those images into one proper document is the real first step before revisions can begin.

None of this calls for a full overhaul of how you work. It just means treating documents as part of the routine instead of an afterthought that shows up once the coffee is gone. Fifteen minutes spent sorting real files into a real structure each morning saves more time by lunch than another motivational routine ever will, and it is the difference between reacting to paperwork all day and starting ahead of it for once.

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The Psychology of Power: How to Win the Mind Games of Business

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Image Credit: Addicted2success

You might think that your business is driven by data, analytics, and perfectly optimized algorithms. But beneath the spreadsheets and KPIs, the business world is driven by something far more primitive: human psychology.

Robert Greene, the mastermind behind The 48 Laws of Power, has spent decades studying how top executives, historical figures, and entrepreneurs navigate strategy. His conclusion? Human behavior is compulsive, obsessive, and entirely predictable if you know what to look for.

Whether you are scaling a startup, navigating corporate politics, or trying to understand why a competitor is outmaneuvering you, success rarely comes down to who works the hardest. It comes down to who understands the social game. Here is a breakdown of Greene’s most potent strategies for mastering the psychology of business.

1. The Art of Concealing Intentions

Is honesty really the best policy in business? According to Greene, the answer is a resounding no—at least, not with everyone.

When dealing with your internal team, transparency is essential. A leader must have a clear vision and communicate it directly so the organization can execute without chaos. However, when it comes to your competitors, complete transparency is a fatal flaw.

If your rivals know exactly where you are headed, what your next product launch looks like, or what your strategy will be in six months, they will mirror you and counter your moves. The game of power is subtle. To win, you must keep your competitors—and sometimes even your clients—on their heels. By concealing your true intentions, you force your rivals into a defensive posture, leaving you in control of the offensive.

2. Why Silence is Your Greatest Leverage

In the corporate world, there is a misconception that the loudest person in the room is the most powerful. Greene argues the exact opposite: talking less creates an aura of power.

When writing The 50th Law with 50 Cent, Greene observed the rapper in high-stakes business meetings. 50 Cent would sit in absolute silence while others talked, causing everyone else in the room to over-explain, backtrack, and ultimately reveal their insecurities.

  • The psychology behind it: When you talk constantly, you signal insecurity and a lack of self-control.

  • The power of silence: When you remain quiet, people project their own anxieties onto you. They wonder what you are thinking. It makes you appear larger, more mysterious, and more authoritative than you actually are.

Every word you say should be strategic. If you cannot control your own mouth, you cannot control your environment.

3. Formlessness: Adapt or Die

Many leaders rise to the top based on a specific strength—maybe it is ruthless aggression, brilliant public speaking, or a populist touch. But holding onto the trait that made you successful is the fastest way to become obsolete.

Borrowing from Machiavelli and Sun Tzu, Greene emphasizes the law of formlessness. The business landscape is shifting constantly; what worked three years ago is likely irrelevant today. If you are rigid in your brand, your personality, or your strategy, the world will pass you by.

Consider a brand like American Apparel, which thrived in the early 2000s on a very specific, nostalgic, 1980s aesthetic. When consumer tastes shifted in 2009, leadership refused to adapt. They clung to the form that brought them initial success, and it ultimately led to their downfall. True power belongs to the leader who can reinvent themselves and change shape to fit the times.

4. Never Outshine the Master (Navigating Ego)

This is arguably the most critical workplace law to engrave into your brain: everyone has an ego, and everyone has insecurities.

If you are an employee working under a boss, your natural instinct is to work incredibly hard, do a brilliant job, and take all the credit to prove your worth. But if you try too eagerly to impress and you end up soaking up all the attention, you will trigger your boss’s insecurities. Unconsciously, they will start viewing you as a threat.

To survive and advance, you must master the nuanced art of letting the person above you take some of the glory.

  • Do the heavy lifting.

  • Present the wins.

  • Let your superior feel as though it was their visionary leadership that made it possible.

It might feel unfair, but reacting emotionally to this dynamic drains your energy. Accept that taking a strategic backseat is simply part of the power game. By stroking the ego of the person above you, you secure your position and quietly build your own leverage.

5. Despise the Free Lunch (and Appeal to Self-Interest)

In business, free is the most expensive mistake you can make. When someone offers you something for free, they almost always want something far more valuable in return. On the flip side, being cheap with your money—refusing to pay your employees well or constantly seeking a bargain—signals weakness and a lack of abundance.

When you need something from a powerful person, do not appeal to their mercy. Do not remind them of a past favor or ask for help out of the goodness of their heart. Instead, appeal strictly to their self-interest.

Powerful people lack two things: time and attention. If your proposal can save them time, organize their chaos, or solve a specific insecurity they have, they will be eating out of the palm of your hand.

The Ultimate Shift: Outward Focus

The single most important skill you can master in business is shifting your focus outward. Stop obsessing over your own needs, your own emotions, and whether people like you. Instead, become a master observer of the social game. Watch the trends, study your competitors, and fiercely analyze the unspoken needs of your clients. When you stop acting out of emotion and start acting out of strategy, the entire game changes.

Here is a powerful breakdown with Mark Brazil and Robert Greene

 

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