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Success Advice

How The Super Successful Think: Any One Of These Ideas Can Transform Your Entire Life

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The super successful think differently and act differently. Like anything, these results can be mimicked in your own life.

There is a list of ideas that all the super successful have in common and it’s what makes them think the way they do.

I’ve spent the last twelve months compiling the ideas that can transform your entire life which I’ve learned by studying how the super successful think.

Any one of these ideas could be the single catalyst for you transforming your entire life.

 

Nerves don’t stop even when you’re super successful.

“The world’s most accomplished athletes still get nerves before big games. Bill Russell, one of the greatest players in NBA history (winner of 11 championships in 13 years) often vomited before big games due to nerves and anxiety” – Anthony Moore

Even your idols are scared out of their mind when they have to perform at an extremely high level.

The goal is not to avoid uncomfortable situations or be upset with the nervousness; the goal is to use nerves to propel you forward into the unknown, thus creating the results you never thought were possible.

 

 

Everything is temporary so just notice it.

“How do you get out of this misery? By understanding that pain, sadness, and suffering are a natural part of life. It is also temporary and ever-changing, as is joy, happiness, and pleasure.

If you stop fighting things you don’t like and trying desperately to hold onto things you do like, life can become more peaceful. Everything is temporary, so just notice it.

Observe it, without any sort of craving or aversion. Everything will ultimately shift, change, or go away, and that’s okay, because something new will take its place” – Ivy Kwong

Right now, may be a difficult time for you. Maybe you’re going through relationship issues, sickness, lack of money or you feel uninspired. Even the super successful experience these challenging moments. The key is to remember that everything is temporary.

These low moments are seasons in your life and like all seasons of weather, they will pass.

 

Destroy fear by having the guts.

“You just have to outrun everyone who doesn’t have the guts to publish their work” – Jon Westenberg

Anything worth doing requires execution. Trying to overthink your life’s work and whether it will be appreciated is ridiculous.

The reason bloggers like Tim Ferriss have crushed it is because they choose to hit publish. Your work is never finished and aiming for perfection will never allow you to gain feedback.

Success is directly related to the feedback you get and the improvements you make to your life’s work. Transforming your life requires you to get results so you’ll have the energy and motivation to keep going on the tough days when you feel like giving up.

It takes guts to embrace your fear and put your work out there. If you push through this barrier, you’ll get the results of the super successful who many believe have got lucky. Luck has nothing to do with it.

 

Say yes even when you don’t know how to do something.

“Very rarely do you walk into a situation knowing all the answers, and this ambiguity used to keep me from saying yes to a lot of opportunities. Unless I knew exactly how I was going to do something, I would avoid it” – Nicolas Cole

That’s how I’m writing this very article because I said yes to my friend Joel Brown, to the opportunity to blog on his website. I knew literally nothing and said yes anyway.

As you experiment with different ideas and activities, you’ll quickly learn what you do and don’t like. Then, it’s just a matter of doing more of what you’re passionate about and the results will come from there.

You’ll never quite be able to predict what ends up becoming your life’s work. Saying yes and not having all the answers is how you find the path towards success.

 

Your purpose always starts with passion.

“Divorce yourself from the results at first. Write because you love it” – Tom Kuelgar

Finding your purpose so you can be super successful requires an element of passion.

That comes from practicing habits because you love them instead of actually aiming for success which is invisible without passion.

 

Unrelated tasks form part of the process of any successful endeavor. 

“And sometimes ‘writing” doesn’t even look like writing - because sometimes writing is really thinking, which looks a lot like ‘zoning out” or doing “nothing” and only makes it harder” – Kris Gage

Tim Ferriss spends time procrastinating and traveling a lot. He puts these two activities down to how he’s able to come up with ideas for new books and ask powerful questions on his podcast. Travel is where he disconnects from the real-world so he can come up with what’s going to be next.

Tim’s travel and procrastination are part of his personal formula for success.

If he just wrote his chart-topping, best-selling books and never traveled or sat in procrastination for hours, we’d never have heard of his name and thought of him as super successful.

 

Developing yourself is how you win.

“Formal education makes a living, but self-education makes a fortune” – Jim Rohn

There’s a reason the self-development industry has taken off: it works and the super successful know it. Everything starts with you and unless you develop and grow, you’ll never adopt the habits, mindset or skills needed to master any pursuit.

Making a living sucks and it limits your ability to contribute to a cause that is greater than yourself. Working on yourself so you can make a fortune and give away money to things you care about like J.K. Rowling did is how you leave a legacy.

Legacy gives you a meaning for your life and it will also transform your entire perspective.

 

Reflect on what you’ve learned immediately.

“When you read, to maximize what you learn: immediately after reading a book write down ‘ten things I learned.’ Else, you won’t remember more than 1 or 2 things at best from the book” – James Altucher

That’s why I blog and share content on social media. It allows me to take the lessons from everything I learn day-to-day and share it with others, while simultaneously making sure I remember and practice what I’ve learned.

As people engage and comment on what I share, the lessons are further ingrained in my own head and I’m forced to defend these newfound views in the form of replies to negative comments.

Don’t rely on your brain to remember anything. It will get distracted and you’ll forget the lessons that you paid a high price to get. Repetition is the mother of skill and it will increase your retention rate.

 

If you want success, there will be failure.

 “Success becomes a catalyst for failure” – Greg McKeown

People who think failure is bad never go on to do a hell of a lot. If you want to join the super successful and think like they do, you need to realize that all of your successes will also increase your future rate of failure.

Failure and success go hand-in-hand like a beautiful marriage. Put the ring on your finger, sign the marriage papers and join the wedding party of Mr. Failure and Mrs. Success.

 

The only time you actually have to live is in the present.

“This is a way out of suffering. This is how you live. Not in the past, not in the future, but now, in the present. The only time that you actually have to live” – Ivy Kwong

We all do a hell of a lot of thinking (including the super successful). This thinking can be in either the past, the future or the present. The choice is yours. The present is what you can control and if you never live in that space, then you’ll never get to truly live.

Transformation happens when you quit living in the past and the future. Success lies in the present.

 

Overworking is the opposite of success.

“For best results: Spend 20% of your energy on your work and 80% of your energy on recovery and self-improvement” – Benjamin P Hardy

Doing your life’s work and leaving a legacy requires hard, strenuous labor. It requires a lot of time to recover from the energy it takes to do the impossible and smash your goals.

Recovery in the form of procrastination, social activities, reading and meditation is how you regain the mental capacity to keep working.

The lie of hustling until you die is stupid. Your growth lies in the recovery.

 

Value pain.

“Successful people value the process and the work itself over the outcome, the party, the accolades, and the money. In some way, they value the pain” – Jane Hwangbo

Pain is one of the hardest things to manage and it’s what you should value.

Putting up with the pain so you can get the results many dream of instead of drinking alcohol, watching Netflix and arguing about events that are outside of your control is what the super successful value.

It’s as if the struggle is more important than the positive feelings you get when you achieve your goals. Sounds weird at first but it’s true.

 

The antidote to low moments.

“When we give gratitude to everything in our lives specifically and exactly for the way they are regardless of whether we wish it to be different, something magical happens. It is especially a challenge when we practice this during trying times when it feels as though we are failing at life” – Sheryl Tai

Handling those situations that feel like a tornado has just wiped out your home and family, is tough. Many of us have no idea what to do. The antidote to these times is gratitude.

Gratitude will bring you back to what you can control and rebalance your thoughts in the direction of positivity. From a positive mental state, you can heal from being knocked flat on your face and get back up again to face the next storm.

Think of being grateful from now on as a reset button.

 

The truth wins every single time. Period.

“Never, ever lie about anything to anyone. Counterintuitive, but this seems to be a huge social hack and people like you a lot more if you always tell everyone the truth, no matter how embarrassing or hurtful” – Serge Faguet

The rarest of traits and something that epitomizes real success is the truth. The Super Successful don’t just have the life we all dream of, they have the following: a quality network, resources to give back, our respect, people’s attention and passion to do, and to become more.

None of this so-called ‘Holy Grail’ can come into your life unless you commit to telling the truth. The truth feels good and it will separate you from everyone else who wants to talk a good game, bend the truth and even straight out lie to your face.

The truth is always the right decision even when it doesn’t look like it on face-value. The truth breeds authenticity and authenticity is sexy.

 

There’s no need to focus on success.

Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long run - in the long run, I say! - success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think of it” – John Gorman

Focus on how you think and the character traits that will lead you to success. Doing that is how you become super successful in the first place.

 

Choose a purpose bigger than yourself.

“Don’t aim at success - the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one’s dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself” – Victor Frankl

Focusing on success often leads to a selfish pursuit of falling in love with yourself. The truth is that success comes from not focusing on yourself or the word “success.”

Success comes from what you can unselfishly do to help all of us reach our own ideals of success through our passions and our purpose. Bet you didn’t expect that to be the secret that the super successful all know and embrace now did you?

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared hundreds of thousands of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around success, personal development, motivation, and entrepreneurship. During the day Tim works with the most iconic tech companies in the world, as an adviser, to assist them in expanding into Australia. By night, Tim coaches his students on the principles of personal development and the fundamentals of entrepreneurship. You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net or through his Facebook.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Isaac Wechuli

    Apr 4, 2018 at 2:50 am

    True Tim Denning. I loved all the points especially the one about ‘everything is temporary.’ I often use the policy ‘this too shall pass,’ so that I enjoy good moments because I know they won’t last forever. Also, I use it during bad times to remind myself that my hardships won’t last because everything is always changing. night turns into day, darkness gives way to light, and the storm paves way for the sun

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Success Advice

7 Skills You Need to Master Before You Can Achieve Success

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skills

As a hardworking entrepreneur, I need to regularly remind myself to look up and out. In the world of business and technology, reality often changes before I can put a coherent thought together. I try to stay on top of my social media accounts such as Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube. The list seems endless, yet, I must continue to learn, grow and change as my mediums do.

There are podcasts, personal blogs, guest blogging, online courses, dream boards, interviews, strategy sessions and mastermind groups. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to think about all the opportunities and challenges of today’s fast-paced, global society.

What I learned about success running a brick and mortar business holds true for new challenges in the world of digital marketing. To be successful, I need the right tools in my toolbox. With the basics, I can create a strong foundation on which I will build my business and life. Success occurs when I stay focused on developing the character traits and skills necessary to thrive.

Here are the 7 skills you must develop to achieve success:

1. Belief  

Do you believe in yourself and your dream? Do you believe you are capable of making it happen? Is your belief strong enough to knock down the walls you’ll inevitably face while pursuing your objective? If so, you’ll be a winner because winners develop an ability to push aside distractions while staying intensely focused on the end goal. The passion necessary to do so is fueled by an unwavering belief in yourself and your capabilities.

2. Communication

One trick of communication is learning the what, who and how of the process. First and foremost, you must determine the information you actually need to communicate. What do you need to say, and what is to be kept private? Who do you need to convey the information to? For some of us, a chain of command must be followed thus one must communicate with the right people in the correct order.

How do you do so, and what’s the best method of delivery? It is imperative to get this right. Have you ever seen the fallout from a relationship damaged by a simple message conveyed through the wrong medium, such as a text?

Mastery of basic communication skills is crucial for everyone, not just entrepreneurs. You absolutely must make the development of this skill set a priority.

The best rule to follow when it comes to conveying information is if it is an important message, deliver it personally, in person or by phone, not through email or text.

“Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.” – Plato

3. Courage

Fear is powerful and it can stop you in you in your tracks. Fear makes you think you need to turn around when you don’t, and it has the potential to rob you of your dreams. A dedicated entrepreneur finds the courage necessary to bust through fear. As an example, I am fearful of public speaking, yet it is often necessary. If I take time to practice in front of my family or small group of friends, I gain valuable experience and greater confidence in myself. The best way to beat fear is by summoning the courage to walk through it.

4. Flexibility

Flexibility is one of your most important skills. The key is learning to flex without breaking.  Whether an owner, manager or employee, you will be asked many times throughout your life to be flexible with your availability, your attitudes, and your management of self and others. In order to achieve maximum flexibility, you must first define your limits and boundaries. In businesses large and small, and in life, flexibility is a critical skill to master because even the strongest of us can snap when we are stretched past our breaking point.

5. Integrity

Integrity is honesty. Integrity helps you identify your strengths and character defects. It helps you make an honest assessment of who you are and what you are capable of. We need integrity to draw and keep the right people, both employees and customers. When people look to their leaders, they respect the person whose words match their actions. Integrity binds us together.

6. Mentorship

When you allow yourself to be mentored by someone, you tap into a wealth of information, communication and conversation. Due to the nature of the relationship, a mentor can tell you the truth about yourself or your business as the right mentor already walked the path you are now on. Out of their experience, a mentor informs you of the pitfalls you might face and can teach you how to approach and conquer challenges.

“My mentor said, ‘Let’s go do it,’ not ‘You go do it.’ How powerful when someone says, ‘Let’s!’” – Jim Rohn

7. Willingness

Are you willing to do whatever it takes, as long as the “it” is ethical? Will you work 12-hour-days for weeks, with no paycheck? Will you clean toilets, sweep floors and empty trash? Are you willing to forgo material pleasures while building your dream? Can you ask for help? Are you willing to listen to constructive criticism? Will you set aside your ego and accept opportunities for growth as they come? Will you commit the time to continually expand your knowledge base?

Growth requires education and dedication. You must be willing to go the extra mile and be able to see success before it materializes. You must work like no one else to succeed like no one else. This is by no means an exhaustive list, but a basic skill set you need to start strong, maintain focus and achieve success. New tools will be added to your toolboxes as you move forward.

When one of your tools is no longer useful, give it to a new entrepreneur.  It’s important to pass knowledge on to keep growing yourself. Sharing with one another is how we all succeed.

Which one of these skills has helped you most in life so far? Let us know in the comments below!

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Success Advice

A Productivity Book That Will Flip the Way You Get Things Done

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Erin falconer

Tired of having to do more each day with even less time? Can you imagine if your day felt comfortable, calming and fulfilling? Instead of to-do lists, calendaring galore and constant daily check-offs, there is another way that will save you time, save you sanity and save your life. Instead of a one-stop solution to productivity, why not customize productivity to who you are and what you want out of life?

Once you read self-improvement expert, Erin Falconer’s latest book, “How to Get Sh*t Done”, you’ll breathe a big sign of relief. This book is a wake-up call and a life-changing approach to how you get through your days. Instead of jam-packing your life with obligations and unwanted commitments, this book will empower you to turn your life inside out and get what’s most important to you, done.

Instead of checking off to-do items, the book presents a system to help you figure out who you are and what you want out of life. It’s not systems and methods that are preventing you from being productive, Falconer claims, but simply not knowing yourself and what you want.

Here are the 9 things Erin says you need to understand to shift your perspective to not only do more but to do more with purpose and meaning:

1. Understand your personality

Get honest about who you are, how you live your life and the unique quirks about yourself. She presents a list of questions in the early chapters to help you understand what drives you, what tires you and what makes you feel most alive. What brings you happiness? What doesn’t? What makes you feel awesome? What makes you want to quit? To be productive is to know your self and your unique personality. It’s to ask the big questions in life so you can determine what it is that you actually want to do.

2. Start living your life without judgment

Falconer points out that much of our habits and behaviors are influenced by what others think about us. We create this busy life because we are supposed to act and perform a certain way. There are voices and pressures in your own mind, for women more than men, that create ambivalence and uncertainty. You no longer know what you want because you can’t hear yourself. You are pressured by society, friends and family to do more.

“You may feel like the most productive person ever, but without a purpose, you’re just busy.” – Erin Falconer

3. Listen to yourself

You have the answers and you know best. When you consider other perspectives and opinions, you drown out your own. You can’t see the forest from the trees and become more confused. Stay the course and listen to yourself no matter how small that initial whisper is of self-knowledge and wisdom. Use mindfulness in your everyday life for more clarity and direction on what it is you want out of your life.

4. Be present

Mindfulness is the key to knowing what you’re thinking and what you want. It’s about cutting out the noise in your head, silencing the many people who try to influence you and getting the right stuff done. As Falconer shares in this wisdom-bomb, “to change your life, you must remain present in your life.” This allows you to focus on each moment, being aware of what you’re doing and staying the course.

5. Stop yes-sing your life away

You’re likely to do things for other people, especially as a woman, because you want to be a good person and please others. You take on responsibilities, obligations and do things you feel you have to do out of the need to make everyone happy and comfortable. Stop doing tasks that your heart isn’t into and use the magic “no” word more. Be intentional with your choices and what you choose to take on.

6. Stop should-ing your life away

“Should-ing ourselves is a major energy drain, as it compels us to split focus. We’re forcing our minds to be in two places at once,” Falconer writes. When you do those things you feel like you should do, you are not doing what you want to do and not being fully present to the task you don’t want to do. Start noticing all those should-do tasks in your life and begin eliminating those. Do more of what you want and less of what you should.

7. Focus on three things at a time

Life’s too short to do what you have no interest or time for. Falconer suggests you focus on three things and only three things at a time. Limit your goals to what you want most out of life right now. Create a goal for your career, for your personal growth and for your relationship growth. Move towards the goals that feel right to you and matches your values in life. Refer to Chapter 5 of “How to Get Shit Done” for strategies to narrow your focus and get super clear on the goals you want to pursue in life.

“How is it possible to attain happiness, fulfillment, and a sense that we’ve been truly productive in our lives if we haven’t even asked the most fundamental questions of ourselves? Who are you? What gives you energy — like, real energy? Who makes you happy? And of course, what do you really want?” – Erin Falconer

8. Outsource your life

No, not your entire life. Start outsourcing the work and tasks that you don’t want to do, that are counter-productive and not very fulfilling to you. There is no shame and absolutely no gain to you for handing off tasks to others who can do it better, faster and with more enthusiasm. Determine the costs versus benefit of situations and tasks to determine if outsourcing makes sense in this instance. “Do you make up the amount of money spent in time, found energy or productive minutes?”

9. Structure your day

While much of “How to Get Shit Done” is about refocusing and re-prioritizing your life to fit your values, the last parts of the book help you use your time better to fulfill those things that are important to you. The later chapters of the book help you set intentional mornings so you start the day the right way. Falconer also suggests starting your day with the top priorities and to do the big-ticket items first. Other tips include avoiding emails early in the day, avoiding people who distract you and ending each day by listing your goals for the next day.

To learn more about this new way of getting productive, pick up “How to Get Shit Done” today. Yes, you’ll be more productive but you’ll more likely be more purposeful.

What is your favorite book on success? Comment below!

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Success Advice

Selfishness In Your Career Is Causing You To Lose In The Long-term.

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In my career recently, I dealt with someone who blocked me from doing what I love. They chose selfishness over an abundance mindset when it came to decision of helping me or not.

 

Right now, it feels like the short game works.

You perform an act of selfishness in your career and you think to yourself “Hey I just won.”

You feel like you’ve won… temporarily.

Then you go on a holiday for a while, come back to your career and realize that everything has changed. Your act of selfishness secretly got noticed behind the scenes causing your appearance of being a leader to be shattered into a thousand pieces.

A restructure hits while you’re away and you realize that all your supporters are gone. Then, all you’re left with is your reputation.

That reputation means nothing when you’re known for being selfish.

 

The trouble with all of this?

You never find out.

“This hidden disease that you’ve planted yourself in your career attacks at the very foundations of your career health while you think you’ve won”

Selfishness has a bitter aftertaste. Selfishness is always discovered whether you like it or not.

 

You have a choice.

The choice is to try and protect everything you have and build your own empire within the context of your career or do what I have religiously done: stop giving a f*ck and give whatever you can, whenever you can.

People remember kindness.

People remember who helped them in their career.

People give opportunities to those who are not selfish.

“The selfish ones end up marching behind an army of the blind thinking negative thoughts and blaming “The Company” for their misfortunes”

You’re responsible for your misfortunes and they grow from your own selfishness.

Your grand plans for your career are stupid if they come about from a position of selfishness and personal gain. Choose kindness instead.

 

Once you burn your current career, this happens.

You come back from your holiday and realize you need to move on. You contact the customers you think are your allies and realize they’re not feeling very generous.

The opportunities you thought you had as a fall-back in case someone discovered the true selfish person that you are don’t exist.

The real world doesn’t acknowledge or bend over backwards for those who demonstrate selfishness on a regular basis.

 

The long game is where it’s at ladies and gentlemen.

What is the long game you ask? Simple. Don’t be selfish in your career. What does that look like? See below:

–    Help people step up into your role while you are away on holidays, maternity / paternity leave

–    Breed more leaders if that’s what you call yourself

–    Do random acts of kindness to help people in their career when there’s no reason to

–    Put your own self-interests to one side when dealing with customers

–    Quit thinking with a “protect my own fortress” mindset – it’s killing your success

–    Be humble, grateful and caring towards everyone you work with – even if you dislike them

The long game is about demonstrating that you can be the kind of person that is trusted and unwavering in the human pursuit of success, and the people you work with.

When your colleagues win, you win too – that’s how you have to start thinking.

This Silicon Valley Mindset of “I have to beat everyone I work with” and “We’re all in competition with each other” is total BS.

“Collaboration trumps silo work and selfishness every day of the week”

Wake up and take a look at the entrepreneurs you admire like Elon Musk, Richard Branson and Tony Robbins. Do they do everything themselves or collaborate like crazy?

You already know the answer.

Does Gary Vee sit around doing everything himself and taking all the credit? Not a chance. He promotes his creative colleagues Babin and D-Rock and makes them the star of his content.

 

Selfishness is always going to surround you.

And that’s why if you do the opposite and show love and kindness in your career, then you’ll become the 1% that succeed, live with passion, and go on to be CEOs and Founders.

Be the difference you want to see in your career.

Throw selfishness out with the bath water and join the abundance economy where it’s all about focusing on the long game.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Success Advice

15 Things You Need To Be Successful That Your Loser Ass Friends Don’t Do.

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Success is a word that’s thrown around a lot. In some ways, it has lost its meaning. We all want it and the definition of success is different for everyone.

Some of us want a great family life. Some of us want a successful business. Some of us want lots of money so we can do cool stuff.

You may think that naming and shaming what your loser ass friends do is harsh. Unfortunately, life and success are harsh so unless you get serious and call a spade a spade, you’ll never breakthrough to become the person you want to be.

Unless the lesson is harsh, you’ll never get the wakeup call that you so desperately need. Enough is enough. It’s time to stop fantasizing and implement the tools needed to get what you want.

Whatever your definition of success is, you’ll need this list of things:

 

1. An “I want to help without expecting anything in return” mentality.

The understanding of mutual value is the foundation for all of business and life. The moment you treat every person you encounter as a transaction and you want to always come out on top, is the moment that you’ll continue to fall short of your goals and dreams.

Coming from a place of giving above all else is how you win at life. Expectations are ugly and we can all see them from a mile away. Expectations are filled with self-interest, self-promotion, huge egos and a general lack of wisdom and knowledge.

Your loser friends are always calculating what they can get out of every situation. You must think the opposite and concentrate on what you can give.

 

2. An investment in your mindset.

That brain of yours is controlling everything you do and it will be fighting against your best interests unless you program it to operate it in an effective manner. It takes time and often money to teach your brain how to think.

Your mindset is built to be negative unless you invest in some strategies and learning to add some positivity. A single pump up session is not enough; you need long lasting and proven strategies to rewire your brain to focus on success instead of just survival.

“Short-term motivation and inspiration will only help you briefly. Those positivity Instagram picture quotes will last an even shorter period of time”

Your loser ass friends have not refined their mindset but you must if you want to be successful.

 

3. Join a social media pod.

Okay, many of you have never heard of this. Right now, on every social media platform, there are what is referred to as ‘engagement pods.’

These are groups of people who share ideas and social media content with each other. Every time someone in the pod does something, the rest of the members show support and share their opinions.

It’s a new age version of a mastermind with content at the heart of the group – rather than one giant leader who is looked upon as the guru and giver of life itself…Haha.

Find people who share the same passion as you. Reach out to them and ask them to join a pod with you. Create guidelines around how your pod works and the mutual value that you all bring.

Then, use WhatsApp, Messenger, WeChat, Telegram or whatever your favorite group chat app is to bring people together in your pod.

Your loser ass friends are not creating content, sharing winning ideas or doing much else other than indulging in BBQs and whinge sessions about their day job. You can escape that toxic environment through starting or joining one of these pods.

 

4. A healthy cocktail of discomfort mixed with fear – shaken not stirred.

Everything worth doing is uncomfortable. Period.

If all you do is bask in the comfort of those activities and people that you know well, you’ll never go to new heights. Success is partly about exploring the unknown. It’s by doing the stuff that you never thought was possible that you discover yourself and ultimately achieve some incredible goals.

These goals wouldn’t feel like success unless they were uncomfortable. Doing easy stuff doesn’t feel like success and you won’t be acknowledged for it.

Fear on the other hand often looks like something that should be avoided. When you suck at public speaking, you tell yourself lies such as “I’m an introvert” or “I’m just not a natural at giving speeches.”

These are excuses that society gives you for free as a false antidote to fears that come up in your life. We all have fears and avoiding them is not the answer.

It’s uncomfortable to battle a major fear but when you do, you show courage, strength, resilience and bravery. These are the traits of someone who’s going to be successful.

Your loser ass friends are maximizing couch time, working “cushy jobs,” cheating the system to get freebies, betting or gambling and being lazy. You need to get used to the uncomfortable and to mixing it up with the very things that make you fearful.

 

5. An understanding of what you want.

This is so crazy: Most people don’t know what they want. They’ve never spent the time to understand what sets them on fire and makes them passionate.

It’s surprisingly harder than the self-help preachers proclaim. Knowing what you want is difficult in reality. You have to spend time experimenting and reflecting to discover what you want.

No matter how old you are, if you don’t know what you want by now, don’t be angry. Choose action over anger. Go out there and try lots of stuff. Give a speech, travel the world, start a blog, write one chapter of a book, make some art, build a shed, learn salsa dancing.

Bottomline is this: just try something new until you find something that brings a smile to your face or feels effortless. Find something you’re happy doing for free and don’t need #MotivationMonday for.

Your loser ass friends don’t know what they want. They lack clarity which gives them zero purpose for getting out of bed. You need to experiment like a five-year-old and enjoy the process.

 

6. You must sacrifice.

That could be staying home on Saturday to work rather than going to the burger bar. It could be missing a social event on Friday and a few drinks. It could even be time blocking out a few hours that you agree on with your significant other so you can work.

“Success will never happen without sacrifice. Sacrifice is the currency of success. Stop thinking you can do more and start thinking ‘What am I going to give up so I can be successful’ “

Oprah was wrong: you can’t have everything you want. There aren’t enough hours in the day. Your life is way too short without a sacrifice strategy in place.

Your loser ass friends think they can do it all and be it all. You must take the opposite approach and begin the process of giving up on a few things. Your to-do list needs to get shorter, not longer.

 

7. A freaking weapon of a mentor.

Not someone who’s never achieved anything big or anything that matters to you. I’m talking about the real dude who lives and breathes success every day for breakfast. He or she wakes up in the morning and the first thing they do is eat success for breakfast.

They’ve done cool sh*t that you could only dream of and they know how to execute above all else. This weapon of a mentor will be hard to attract in your life. You’ll need something valuable to give them in return for their wisdom and Yoda-like ability.

If all else fails, you’ll need to pull out your wallet and pay someone if you really can’t figure it out.

Your loser ass friends are being mentored by the bankrupt car mechanic down the road on how to be successful. You need to be mentored by a tycoon who has humility and can show you the human traits that will be your secret formula to win at life.

 

8. A life-changing event.

This event will be focused on personal development. It will be a long series of days where you’ll be immersed and away from your phone and family. There will be moments of inspiration, realizations of heartbreak, meetings with new people and lots of breaking your comfort zone.

There’s likely to be music to fuel your emotions, bright lights to change your state and others going through the exact same process as you.

These events occur all around the world. They take many forms. The one that changed my life was with Tony Robbins but there are many to choose from. Either way, you need a single moment to break your current pattern of thinking.

You need some time and space to let go of your excess baggage so that you can grow. Immersion is the only way to fast-track this process.

Your loser ass friends don’t believe in changing their life through immersive events. They think it’s all spiritual and woo-woo, and that they can just spend short periods of time thinking about what worked and what didn’t work. Many of your loser friends don’t even do that.

You must develop yourself and fast-track the process if you want to be successful. Immersion is the best way.

 

9. Resources other than money.

Non-financial resources are going to be required in abundance. This will be in the form of time and skills.

“Time will be harvested and stored by saying NO lots, clearing events from your diary that have no meaning, and doing less in the pursuit of pleasure and more in the pursuit of success”

Skills will take the form of a few abilities that you’ll develop further which are in a narrow area. You’ll be able to go deep in this field and you’ll be a practitioner. Skills will be one of the ways you deliver passion and you’ll focus on a few rather than many broad, unrelated abilities.

Your loser ass friends think the only resource they need is money. You must understand that resources go way beyond what money could ever do. Money is a by-product of value.

 

10. A chemical rebalance.

“Okay WTF are you talking about Tim, you weirdo?”

What I’m saying here is simple: Your body is nothing but a giant lump of mass full of chemicals. If those chemicals are mostly toxic and not balanced, you’re going to be pissed off, low on energy, upset, emotional and borderline psycho.

Have I convinced you yet?

You can’t be successful unless you get your body in order. That could be a health check-up with your doctor, a visit to the naturopath, some herbal supplements to help you detox or a new juicing routine to pump some vitamins into that body of yours that you’ve neglected.

Your loser ass friends are eating at McDonald’s. You need to be eating for success and pumping good chemicals into that beautiful body you were given.

 

11. Decision-making speed.

No matter what you do, decisions are going to be involved. You will need to be able to cut off from the many options and choose a path. How quickly you make decisions will determine the speed at which you can progress. Decisions take up so much of your energy and headspace.

Decisions are a drain on your brain which impacts negatively on your ability to produce results. Knowing what you want will help you make decisions faster too. Half the reason you take so long to make a decision is that you don’t know what you really want.

You’re making decisions without a blueprint to make the process quicker. Overthinking is the death of all good ideas and opportunities.

Your loser friends consistently fall into the trap of indecision. You must get clear on what you want, balance the uncertainty and fear, and charge towards making a decision. When you’re overcome with indecision, your default answer should be no.

 

12. A love for someone other than yourself.

Only focusing on yourself and your own selfish desires is not success. It’s a fast road to failure that lacks the understanding of the reason we’re all here in the first place.

The moment you realize that true success (not the Instagram photo-worthy type) is about loving something other than yourself, you’ll have crossed into a different headspace.

That love might be for your customer, your partner, your kids or another human being who needs your help.

Your loser ass friends think that love is stupid or they don’t believe in it. They think the word “love” is for pussies who are soft.

For you to be successful, you must understand love. You must know that love is what created you and love is what will live on long after you’re gone.

 

13. Start aiming for the long game.

Short-term results won’t make you successful. We can all find a short-term opportunity, arbitrage, hack, etc.

The key is to keep finding all of these and understand that nothing stays the same. What made you successful today will not necessarily help you long-term. Success is about clear action with goals attached.

Overnight success is a lie that Hollywood invented. Real success is full of short-term pain, disappointment and hard work. That’s how you get long-term success.

Your loser ass friends are looking for the shortcuts and they have no goals. They think that it’s all about being in the right place at the right time They place bets and focus on luck. You must have a long-term view of where you’re heading and be okay with rapidly changing direction as required.

 

14. You’ll need to help others.

“You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.” – Zig Ziglar

Pretty straight-forward when you think about it. Help is another word for providing value. No level of success can be achieved without some level of helping someone else get what they want first.

Your loser ass friends don’t help anyone. You must help others to be successful.

 

15. An infectious love for kindness and human beings.

Now I’m going to give you the right hook to the face that you didn’t expect to hear from an article like this. We’re going to transcend the loser friends label and even the word success itself.

There’s a continuous theme throughout everything you’ve just read and that is a love for human beings, and a love of kindness. This is what it takes to be human.

“Loving the very thing that you are and treating everyone as human rather than dividing us into races, genders, religious groups, political parties, sexual preferences or any form of label is how you be successful at a very high level”

Kindness brings us together and to be successful, we must embrace the gift we’ve been given of being human. We get one life, one chance and one shot to show the best of what it means to be human.

Our identity is human.

Kindness and a love for one another will trump all forms of success and anything else that you ever thought mattered.

<<<>>>

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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The Inspiration Imperative: Finding Your Recipe to Inspire the World

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inspire the world

An undeniably beautiful facet of the human condition is the responsibility we all share to make each other’s lives better. Inspiring others can be an incredibly rewarding and efficient means to that end. After all, helping others is the spice of life and inspiration allows us to exponentially increase our output of “help”, residually, long after we move on to something else. (more…)

Prem Kumar is the Director of Product at TINYpulse.com, an employee engagement company that empowers organizations to build world class cultures with real-time people data. Prior to TINYpulse, Prem spent 10 years at Microsoft working in a variety of product capacities in areas such as HR Technology, New Ventures, Dynamics 365 and Office 365 bringing countless products to market and being honored as a "Key Talent" at the company. Follow me on Twitter @premkumartweets.

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1 Comment

  1. Isaac Wechuli

    Apr 4, 2018 at 2:50 am

    True Tim Denning. I loved all the points especially the one about ‘everything is temporary.’ I often use the policy ‘this too shall pass,’ so that I enjoy good moments because I know they won’t last forever. Also, I use it during bad times to remind myself that my hardships won’t last because everything is always changing. night turns into day, darkness gives way to light, and the storm paves way for the sun

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Success Advice

7 Skills You Need to Master Before You Can Achieve Success

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skills

As a hardworking entrepreneur, I need to regularly remind myself to look up and out. In the world of business and technology, reality often changes before I can put a coherent thought together. I try to stay on top of my social media accounts such as Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube. The list seems endless, yet, I must continue to learn, grow and change as my mediums do.

There are podcasts, personal blogs, guest blogging, online courses, dream boards, interviews, strategy sessions and mastermind groups. Sometimes it’s overwhelming to think about all the opportunities and challenges of today’s fast-paced, global society.

What I learned about success running a brick and mortar business holds true for new challenges in the world of digital marketing. To be successful, I need the right tools in my toolbox. With the basics, I can create a strong foundation on which I will build my business and life. Success occurs when I stay focused on developing the character traits and skills necessary to thrive.

Here are the 7 skills you must develop to achieve success:

1. Belief  

Do you believe in yourself and your dream? Do you believe you are capable of making it happen? Is your belief strong enough to knock down the walls you’ll inevitably face while pursuing your objective? If so, you’ll be a winner because winners develop an ability to push aside distractions while staying intensely focused on the end goal. The passion necessary to do so is fueled by an unwavering belief in yourself and your capabilities.

2. Communication

One trick of communication is learning the what, who and how of the process. First and foremost, you must determine the information you actually need to communicate. What do you need to say, and what is to be kept private? Who do you need to convey the information to? For some of us, a chain of command must be followed thus one must communicate with the right people in the correct order.

How do you do so, and what’s the best method of delivery? It is imperative to get this right. Have you ever seen the fallout from a relationship damaged by a simple message conveyed through the wrong medium, such as a text?

Mastery of basic communication skills is crucial for everyone, not just entrepreneurs. You absolutely must make the development of this skill set a priority.

The best rule to follow when it comes to conveying information is if it is an important message, deliver it personally, in person or by phone, not through email or text.

“Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.” – Plato

3. Courage

Fear is powerful and it can stop you in you in your tracks. Fear makes you think you need to turn around when you don’t, and it has the potential to rob you of your dreams. A dedicated entrepreneur finds the courage necessary to bust through fear. As an example, I am fearful of public speaking, yet it is often necessary. If I take time to practice in front of my family or small group of friends, I gain valuable experience and greater confidence in myself. The best way to beat fear is by summoning the courage to walk through it.

4. Flexibility

Flexibility is one of your most important skills. The key is learning to flex without breaking.  Whether an owner, manager or employee, you will be asked many times throughout your life to be flexible with your availability, your attitudes, and your management of self and others. In order to achieve maximum flexibility, you must first define your limits and boundaries. In businesses large and small, and in life, flexibility is a critical skill to master because even the strongest of us can snap when we are stretched past our breaking point.

5. Integrity

Integrity is honesty. Integrity helps you identify your strengths and character defects. It helps you make an honest assessment of who you are and what you are capable of. We need integrity to draw and keep the right people, both employees and customers. When people look to their leaders, they respect the person whose words match their actions. Integrity binds us together.

6. Mentorship

When you allow yourself to be mentored by someone, you tap into a wealth of information, communication and conversation. Due to the nature of the relationship, a mentor can tell you the truth about yourself or your business as the right mentor already walked the path you are now on. Out of their experience, a mentor informs you of the pitfalls you might face and can teach you how to approach and conquer challenges.

“My mentor said, ‘Let’s go do it,’ not ‘You go do it.’ How powerful when someone says, ‘Let’s!’” – Jim Rohn

7. Willingness

Are you willing to do whatever it takes, as long as the “it” is ethical? Will you work 12-hour-days for weeks, with no paycheck? Will you clean toilets, sweep floors and empty trash? Are you willing to forgo material pleasures while building your dream? Can you ask for help? Are you willing to listen to constructive criticism? Will you set aside your ego and accept opportunities for growth as they come? Will you commit the time to continually expand your knowledge base?

Growth requires education and dedication. You must be willing to go the extra mile and be able to see success before it materializes. You must work like no one else to succeed like no one else. This is by no means an exhaustive list, but a basic skill set you need to start strong, maintain focus and achieve success. New tools will be added to your toolboxes as you move forward.

When one of your tools is no longer useful, give it to a new entrepreneur.  It’s important to pass knowledge on to keep growing yourself. Sharing with one another is how we all succeed.

Which one of these skills has helped you most in life so far? Let us know in the comments below!

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Success Advice

A Productivity Book That Will Flip the Way You Get Things Done

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Erin falconer

Tired of having to do more each day with even less time? Can you imagine if your day felt comfortable, calming and fulfilling? Instead of to-do lists, calendaring galore and constant daily check-offs, there is another way that will save you time, save you sanity and save your life. Instead of a one-stop solution to productivity, why not customize productivity to who you are and what you want out of life?

Once you read self-improvement expert, Erin Falconer’s latest book, “How to Get Sh*t Done”, you’ll breathe a big sign of relief. This book is a wake-up call and a life-changing approach to how you get through your days. Instead of jam-packing your life with obligations and unwanted commitments, this book will empower you to turn your life inside out and get what’s most important to you, done.

Instead of checking off to-do items, the book presents a system to help you figure out who you are and what you want out of life. It’s not systems and methods that are preventing you from being productive, Falconer claims, but simply not knowing yourself and what you want.

Here are the 9 things Erin says you need to understand to shift your perspective to not only do more but to do more with purpose and meaning:

1. Understand your personality

Get honest about who you are, how you live your life and the unique quirks about yourself. She presents a list of questions in the early chapters to help you understand what drives you, what tires you and what makes you feel most alive. What brings you happiness? What doesn’t? What makes you feel awesome? What makes you want to quit? To be productive is to know your self and your unique personality. It’s to ask the big questions in life so you can determine what it is that you actually want to do.

2. Start living your life without judgment

Falconer points out that much of our habits and behaviors are influenced by what others think about us. We create this busy life because we are supposed to act and perform a certain way. There are voices and pressures in your own mind, for women more than men, that create ambivalence and uncertainty. You no longer know what you want because you can’t hear yourself. You are pressured by society, friends and family to do more.

“You may feel like the most productive person ever, but without a purpose, you’re just busy.” – Erin Falconer

3. Listen to yourself

You have the answers and you know best. When you consider other perspectives and opinions, you drown out your own. You can’t see the forest from the trees and become more confused. Stay the course and listen to yourself no matter how small that initial whisper is of self-knowledge and wisdom. Use mindfulness in your everyday life for more clarity and direction on what it is you want out of your life.

4. Be present

Mindfulness is the key to knowing what you’re thinking and what you want. It’s about cutting out the noise in your head, silencing the many people who try to influence you and getting the right stuff done. As Falconer shares in this wisdom-bomb, “to change your life, you must remain present in your life.” This allows you to focus on each moment, being aware of what you’re doing and staying the course.

5. Stop yes-sing your life away

You’re likely to do things for other people, especially as a woman, because you want to be a good person and please others. You take on responsibilities, obligations and do things you feel you have to do out of the need to make everyone happy and comfortable. Stop doing tasks that your heart isn’t into and use the magic “no” word more. Be intentional with your choices and what you choose to take on.

6. Stop should-ing your life away

“Should-ing ourselves is a major energy drain, as it compels us to split focus. We’re forcing our minds to be in two places at once,” Falconer writes. When you do those things you feel like you should do, you are not doing what you want to do and not being fully present to the task you don’t want to do. Start noticing all those should-do tasks in your life and begin eliminating those. Do more of what you want and less of what you should.

7. Focus on three things at a time

Life’s too short to do what you have no interest or time for. Falconer suggests you focus on three things and only three things at a time. Limit your goals to what you want most out of life right now. Create a goal for your career, for your personal growth and for your relationship growth. Move towards the goals that feel right to you and matches your values in life. Refer to Chapter 5 of “How to Get Shit Done” for strategies to narrow your focus and get super clear on the goals you want to pursue in life.

“How is it possible to attain happiness, fulfillment, and a sense that we’ve been truly productive in our lives if we haven’t even asked the most fundamental questions of ourselves? Who are you? What gives you energy — like, real energy? Who makes you happy? And of course, what do you really want?” – Erin Falconer

8. Outsource your life

No, not your entire life. Start outsourcing the work and tasks that you don’t want to do, that are counter-productive and not very fulfilling to you. There is no shame and absolutely no gain to you for handing off tasks to others who can do it better, faster and with more enthusiasm. Determine the costs versus benefit of situations and tasks to determine if outsourcing makes sense in this instance. “Do you make up the amount of money spent in time, found energy or productive minutes?”

9. Structure your day

While much of “How to Get Shit Done” is about refocusing and re-prioritizing your life to fit your values, the last parts of the book help you use your time better to fulfill those things that are important to you. The later chapters of the book help you set intentional mornings so you start the day the right way. Falconer also suggests starting your day with the top priorities and to do the big-ticket items first. Other tips include avoiding emails early in the day, avoiding people who distract you and ending each day by listing your goals for the next day.

To learn more about this new way of getting productive, pick up “How to Get Shit Done” today. Yes, you’ll be more productive but you’ll more likely be more purposeful.

What is your favorite book on success? Comment below!

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Success Advice

Selfishness In Your Career Is Causing You To Lose In The Long-term.

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In my career recently, I dealt with someone who blocked me from doing what I love. They chose selfishness over an abundance mindset when it came to decision of helping me or not.

 

Right now, it feels like the short game works.

You perform an act of selfishness in your career and you think to yourself “Hey I just won.”

You feel like you’ve won… temporarily.

Then you go on a holiday for a while, come back to your career and realize that everything has changed. Your act of selfishness secretly got noticed behind the scenes causing your appearance of being a leader to be shattered into a thousand pieces.

A restructure hits while you’re away and you realize that all your supporters are gone. Then, all you’re left with is your reputation.

That reputation means nothing when you’re known for being selfish.

 

The trouble with all of this?

You never find out.

“This hidden disease that you’ve planted yourself in your career attacks at the very foundations of your career health while you think you’ve won”

Selfishness has a bitter aftertaste. Selfishness is always discovered whether you like it or not.

 

You have a choice.

The choice is to try and protect everything you have and build your own empire within the context of your career or do what I have religiously done: stop giving a f*ck and give whatever you can, whenever you can.

People remember kindness.

People remember who helped them in their career.

People give opportunities to those who are not selfish.

“The selfish ones end up marching behind an army of the blind thinking negative thoughts and blaming “The Company” for their misfortunes”

You’re responsible for your misfortunes and they grow from your own selfishness.

Your grand plans for your career are stupid if they come about from a position of selfishness and personal gain. Choose kindness instead.

 

Once you burn your current career, this happens.

You come back from your holiday and realize you need to move on. You contact the customers you think are your allies and realize they’re not feeling very generous.

The opportunities you thought you had as a fall-back in case someone discovered the true selfish person that you are don’t exist.

The real world doesn’t acknowledge or bend over backwards for those who demonstrate selfishness on a regular basis.

 

The long game is where it’s at ladies and gentlemen.

What is the long game you ask? Simple. Don’t be selfish in your career. What does that look like? See below:

–    Help people step up into your role while you are away on holidays, maternity / paternity leave

–    Breed more leaders if that’s what you call yourself

–    Do random acts of kindness to help people in their career when there’s no reason to

–    Put your own self-interests to one side when dealing with customers

–    Quit thinking with a “protect my own fortress” mindset – it’s killing your success

–    Be humble, grateful and caring towards everyone you work with – even if you dislike them

The long game is about demonstrating that you can be the kind of person that is trusted and unwavering in the human pursuit of success, and the people you work with.

When your colleagues win, you win too – that’s how you have to start thinking.

This Silicon Valley Mindset of “I have to beat everyone I work with” and “We’re all in competition with each other” is total BS.

“Collaboration trumps silo work and selfishness every day of the week”

Wake up and take a look at the entrepreneurs you admire like Elon Musk, Richard Branson and Tony Robbins. Do they do everything themselves or collaborate like crazy?

You already know the answer.

Does Gary Vee sit around doing everything himself and taking all the credit? Not a chance. He promotes his creative colleagues Babin and D-Rock and makes them the star of his content.

 

Selfishness is always going to surround you.

And that’s why if you do the opposite and show love and kindness in your career, then you’ll become the 1% that succeed, live with passion, and go on to be CEOs and Founders.

Be the difference you want to see in your career.

Throw selfishness out with the bath water and join the abundance economy where it’s all about focusing on the long game.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Success Advice

15 Things You Need To Be Successful That Your Loser Ass Friends Don’t Do.

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Success is a word that’s thrown around a lot. In some ways, it has lost its meaning. We all want it and the definition of success is different for everyone.

Some of us want a great family life. Some of us want a successful business. Some of us want lots of money so we can do cool stuff.

You may think that naming and shaming what your loser ass friends do is harsh. Unfortunately, life and success are harsh so unless you get serious and call a spade a spade, you’ll never breakthrough to become the person you want to be.

Unless the lesson is harsh, you’ll never get the wakeup call that you so desperately need. Enough is enough. It’s time to stop fantasizing and implement the tools needed to get what you want.

Whatever your definition of success is, you’ll need this list of things:

 

1. An “I want to help without expecting anything in return” mentality.

The understanding of mutual value is the foundation for all of business and life. The moment you treat every person you encounter as a transaction and you want to always come out on top, is the moment that you’ll continue to fall short of your goals and dreams.

Coming from a place of giving above all else is how you win at life. Expectations are ugly and we can all see them from a mile away. Expectations are filled with self-interest, self-promotion, huge egos and a general lack of wisdom and knowledge.

Your loser friends are always calculating what they can get out of every situation. You must think the opposite and concentrate on what you can give.

 

2. An investment in your mindset.

That brain of yours is controlling everything you do and it will be fighting against your best interests unless you program it to operate it in an effective manner. It takes time and often money to teach your brain how to think.

Your mindset is built to be negative unless you invest in some strategies and learning to add some positivity. A single pump up session is not enough; you need long lasting and proven strategies to rewire your brain to focus on success instead of just survival.

“Short-term motivation and inspiration will only help you briefly. Those positivity Instagram picture quotes will last an even shorter period of time”

Your loser ass friends have not refined their mindset but you must if you want to be successful.

 

3. Join a social media pod.

Okay, many of you have never heard of this. Right now, on every social media platform, there are what is referred to as ‘engagement pods.’

These are groups of people who share ideas and social media content with each other. Every time someone in the pod does something, the rest of the members show support and share their opinions.

It’s a new age version of a mastermind with content at the heart of the group – rather than one giant leader who is looked upon as the guru and giver of life itself…Haha.

Find people who share the same passion as you. Reach out to them and ask them to join a pod with you. Create guidelines around how your pod works and the mutual value that you all bring.

Then, use WhatsApp, Messenger, WeChat, Telegram or whatever your favorite group chat app is to bring people together in your pod.

Your loser ass friends are not creating content, sharing winning ideas or doing much else other than indulging in BBQs and whinge sessions about their day job. You can escape that toxic environment through starting or joining one of these pods.

 

4. A healthy cocktail of discomfort mixed with fear – shaken not stirred.

Everything worth doing is uncomfortable. Period.

If all you do is bask in the comfort of those activities and people that you know well, you’ll never go to new heights. Success is partly about exploring the unknown. It’s by doing the stuff that you never thought was possible that you discover yourself and ultimately achieve some incredible goals.

These goals wouldn’t feel like success unless they were uncomfortable. Doing easy stuff doesn’t feel like success and you won’t be acknowledged for it.

Fear on the other hand often looks like something that should be avoided. When you suck at public speaking, you tell yourself lies such as “I’m an introvert” or “I’m just not a natural at giving speeches.”

These are excuses that society gives you for free as a false antidote to fears that come up in your life. We all have fears and avoiding them is not the answer.

It’s uncomfortable to battle a major fear but when you do, you show courage, strength, resilience and bravery. These are the traits of someone who’s going to be successful.

Your loser ass friends are maximizing couch time, working “cushy jobs,” cheating the system to get freebies, betting or gambling and being lazy. You need to get used to the uncomfortable and to mixing it up with the very things that make you fearful.

 

5. An understanding of what you want.

This is so crazy: Most people don’t know what they want. They’ve never spent the time to understand what sets them on fire and makes them passionate.

It’s surprisingly harder than the self-help preachers proclaim. Knowing what you want is difficult in reality. You have to spend time experimenting and reflecting to discover what you want.

No matter how old you are, if you don’t know what you want by now, don’t be angry. Choose action over anger. Go out there and try lots of stuff. Give a speech, travel the world, start a blog, write one chapter of a book, make some art, build a shed, learn salsa dancing.

Bottomline is this: just try something new until you find something that brings a smile to your face or feels effortless. Find something you’re happy doing for free and don’t need #MotivationMonday for.

Your loser ass friends don’t know what they want. They lack clarity which gives them zero purpose for getting out of bed. You need to experiment like a five-year-old and enjoy the process.

 

6. You must sacrifice.

That could be staying home on Saturday to work rather than going to the burger bar. It could be missing a social event on Friday and a few drinks. It could even be time blocking out a few hours that you agree on with your significant other so you can work.

“Success will never happen without sacrifice. Sacrifice is the currency of success. Stop thinking you can do more and start thinking ‘What am I going to give up so I can be successful’ “

Oprah was wrong: you can’t have everything you want. There aren’t enough hours in the day. Your life is way too short without a sacrifice strategy in place.

Your loser ass friends think they can do it all and be it all. You must take the opposite approach and begin the process of giving up on a few things. Your to-do list needs to get shorter, not longer.

 

7. A freaking weapon of a mentor.

Not someone who’s never achieved anything big or anything that matters to you. I’m talking about the real dude who lives and breathes success every day for breakfast. He or she wakes up in the morning and the first thing they do is eat success for breakfast.

They’ve done cool sh*t that you could only dream of and they know how to execute above all else. This weapon of a mentor will be hard to attract in your life. You’ll need something valuable to give them in return for their wisdom and Yoda-like ability.

If all else fails, you’ll need to pull out your wallet and pay someone if you really can’t figure it out.

Your loser ass friends are being mentored by the bankrupt car mechanic down the road on how to be successful. You need to be mentored by a tycoon who has humility and can show you the human traits that will be your secret formula to win at life.

 

8. A life-changing event.

This event will be focused on personal development. It will be a long series of days where you’ll be immersed and away from your phone and family. There will be moments of inspiration, realizations of heartbreak, meetings with new people and lots of breaking your comfort zone.

There’s likely to be music to fuel your emotions, bright lights to change your state and others going through the exact same process as you.

These events occur all around the world. They take many forms. The one that changed my life was with Tony Robbins but there are many to choose from. Either way, you need a single moment to break your current pattern of thinking.

You need some time and space to let go of your excess baggage so that you can grow. Immersion is the only way to fast-track this process.

Your loser ass friends don’t believe in changing their life through immersive events. They think it’s all spiritual and woo-woo, and that they can just spend short periods of time thinking about what worked and what didn’t work. Many of your loser friends don’t even do that.

You must develop yourself and fast-track the process if you want to be successful. Immersion is the best way.

 

9. Resources other than money.

Non-financial resources are going to be required in abundance. This will be in the form of time and skills.

“Time will be harvested and stored by saying NO lots, clearing events from your diary that have no meaning, and doing less in the pursuit of pleasure and more in the pursuit of success”

Skills will take the form of a few abilities that you’ll develop further which are in a narrow area. You’ll be able to go deep in this field and you’ll be a practitioner. Skills will be one of the ways you deliver passion and you’ll focus on a few rather than many broad, unrelated abilities.

Your loser ass friends think the only resource they need is money. You must understand that resources go way beyond what money could ever do. Money is a by-product of value.

 

10. A chemical rebalance.

“Okay WTF are you talking about Tim, you weirdo?”

What I’m saying here is simple: Your body is nothing but a giant lump of mass full of chemicals. If those chemicals are mostly toxic and not balanced, you’re going to be pissed off, low on energy, upset, emotional and borderline psycho.

Have I convinced you yet?

You can’t be successful unless you get your body in order. That could be a health check-up with your doctor, a visit to the naturopath, some herbal supplements to help you detox or a new juicing routine to pump some vitamins into that body of yours that you’ve neglected.

Your loser ass friends are eating at McDonald’s. You need to be eating for success and pumping good chemicals into that beautiful body you were given.

 

11. Decision-making speed.

No matter what you do, decisions are going to be involved. You will need to be able to cut off from the many options and choose a path. How quickly you make decisions will determine the speed at which you can progress. Decisions take up so much of your energy and headspace.

Decisions are a drain on your brain which impacts negatively on your ability to produce results. Knowing what you want will help you make decisions faster too. Half the reason you take so long to make a decision is that you don’t know what you really want.

You’re making decisions without a blueprint to make the process quicker. Overthinking is the death of all good ideas and opportunities.

Your loser friends consistently fall into the trap of indecision. You must get clear on what you want, balance the uncertainty and fear, and charge towards making a decision. When you’re overcome with indecision, your default answer should be no.

 

12. A love for someone other than yourself.

Only focusing on yourself and your own selfish desires is not success. It’s a fast road to failure that lacks the understanding of the reason we’re all here in the first place.

The moment you realize that true success (not the Instagram photo-worthy type) is about loving something other than yourself, you’ll have crossed into a different headspace.

That love might be for your customer, your partner, your kids or another human being who needs your help.

Your loser ass friends think that love is stupid or they don’t believe in it. They think the word “love” is for pussies who are soft.

For you to be successful, you must understand love. You must know that love is what created you and love is what will live on long after you’re gone.

 

13. Start aiming for the long game.

Short-term results won’t make you successful. We can all find a short-term opportunity, arbitrage, hack, etc.

The key is to keep finding all of these and understand that nothing stays the same. What made you successful today will not necessarily help you long-term. Success is about clear action with goals attached.

Overnight success is a lie that Hollywood invented. Real success is full of short-term pain, disappointment and hard work. That’s how you get long-term success.

Your loser ass friends are looking for the shortcuts and they have no goals. They think that it’s all about being in the right place at the right time They place bets and focus on luck. You must have a long-term view of where you’re heading and be okay with rapidly changing direction as required.

 

14. You’ll need to help others.

“You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want.” – Zig Ziglar

Pretty straight-forward when you think about it. Help is another word for providing value. No level of success can be achieved without some level of helping someone else get what they want first.

Your loser ass friends don’t help anyone. You must help others to be successful.

 

15. An infectious love for kindness and human beings.

Now I’m going to give you the right hook to the face that you didn’t expect to hear from an article like this. We’re going to transcend the loser friends label and even the word success itself.

There’s a continuous theme throughout everything you’ve just read and that is a love for human beings, and a love of kindness. This is what it takes to be human.

“Loving the very thing that you are and treating everyone as human rather than dividing us into races, genders, religious groups, political parties, sexual preferences or any form of label is how you be successful at a very high level”

Kindness brings us together and to be successful, we must embrace the gift we’ve been given of being human. We get one life, one chance and one shot to show the best of what it means to be human.

Our identity is human.

Kindness and a love for one another will trump all forms of success and anything else that you ever thought mattered.

<<<>>>

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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