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4 Ways to Turn Negativity Into Support

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4 Ways to Turn Negativity Into Support

Are you finding it hard to get support for your crazy dreams from those around you? Welcome to the club of entrepreneurs dealing with that every day.

Before we figure out how to turn that negativity into support we must first learn why the disapproval exists.

We often hear entrepreneurs say, “It is just jealousy” or “They are just mad because I am taking chances they are scared to take”. While this may be true for a small amount of acquaintances, for the most part the issue is completely different.

Who are the people you tell your goals and dreams too? I would take a guess and say family and close friends and people you look up to. Well, your family, friends, and mentors are likely not jealous of you but are more concerned about you. People have their own busy lives to deal with and they are certainly not thinking about yours. They may see your ability to take chances they are scared to make but that is only a reason for them to want to see you succeed and celebrate it.

So then why does this negativity exist when we decide to start a business and go after our big goals? Through many years of being an entrepreneur, a couple different businesses, and making an effort to learn why people think the way they do, I have learned why the negativity exists and how to turn it into support.

Who do you think you are?

I mean really, who do you think you are? Do you expect the moment you decide to take a chance and start a business with no prior experience that everyone around you will drop everything to help you? Up until you decided you wanted to become the next Richard Branson or Mark Cuban your friends and family saw you as a student, employee or unemployed. When you tell them you’re starting a business they will initially want to protect you because they are concerned for your well-being.

Getting an education, working a job and moving up the ladder, has been ingrained into our society as the safest route. I would disagree with that because anytime you’re giving your future into someone else’s hands to decide whether they want to keep you or fire you, it is never a safe route. That is a topic for another article, but my point is that is where the negativity comes from. They just want what they think is best for you, so it is up to you to show them that being an entrepreneur is best for business.

Below are 4 tips I have learned and used effectively to turn negativity into support:

 

1. Stay consistent

Staying consistent is the most effective tip. If there is one tip that you decide to implement, definitely choose to stay on track and keep working towards your goals. As I mentioned above when you first start out, nobody see’s you as an entrepreneur because you weren’t one previously. Just like learning to ride a bike you need to learn how to be an entrepreneur and how to grow a business in the industry you have chosen.

People will start to respect your dreams when they see how much hard work and dedication you’re putting into it. If you start a business and quit in 1 month you cannot expect the people around you to take you serious. That is not to say you must choose a business and no matter what stick to it. Sometimes businesses do not work out for different reasons and you must move on to other opportunities. After interviewing 60+ millionaires, the majority of them have had several businesses before the one that made them millions. The point is they never gave up on being a successful entrepreneur and eventually found the business they knew was the one.

Once they found that business, they focused all their attention on becoming a master at it. They say it takes 10,000 hours to become a master at anything so be prepared to put that much time in if you want to be the best. The people around will see you as a master way before your 10,000th hour due to perception.  After a year or two of consistent growth and skill development people will start to see you as a master and no one can put down a master of their craft. Stay committed and it will be noticed.

“When you look at people who are successful, you will find that they aren’t the people who are motivated, but have consistency in their motivation.” – Arsene Wenger

2. Protect your dreams

Your goals and dreams should be protected like a map to a treasure chest. Stop letting everyone in on your deepest thoughts because most people won’t be able to understand them and you will not have enough time to explain. This was a mistake I made early on when people would ask me what I do. Quickly, I would find myself telling everyone my insane goals and people looking at me like I was immature and crazy.

A conversation focused around your dreams should be saved for the right time and right person. Find a mentor or close friend or family member that is a good listener and can provide valuable feedback. The more you protect your dreams, the more curious people will get and the more they will start to support you. It is a funny thing but it comes down to showing people your dreams instead of just talking about them.

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

3. Support others

Whether you believe in karma or not, supporting others is a great way to gain support. You must learn what others around you are up to. That takes being interested and asking questions. Instead of waiting for someone to ask you what you’re up to, ask them what’s going on in their lives. This is your opportunity to be supportive and add as much value to their lives as you can.

As entrepreneurs we need to get laser focused on our businesses and it is easy to lose awareness of the people around us and want to always talk about what we’re up to. When you’re around people, change this mindset and start being more interested than interesting. The more you help people the more they will begin to support you and that help you gave will be reciprocated tenfold.

 

4. Be vulnerable *Expert Tip*

This tip is not for everyone but if used properly, it can create powerful relationships and will give you enough support and encouragement that will help propel your dedication.

Above I mentioned to protect your dreams and save this important conversation for a select few. When you find the people that you trust enough to talk about your biggest goals and dreams with, put everything on the table. Focus on WHY you want to achieve these goals.

I remember awhile back someone I knew quit his job to start a business. He told me how negative his wife was being about his decision. I told him to put himself in her shoes. She is likely concerned considering you have never owned a business, scared for her own wellbeing and unsure about the whole situation. I told him he needs to stop talking about his business because she is not going to understand but instead start talking about why you started the business. After she heard his reasoning it started a whole new conversation on a much deeper level. When we become vulnerable we allow people to come into our minds and they can begin to support our why’s because why’s are powerful.

I have done this with a few people and my relationships with them have become very important to me and my business. These people are my biggest supporters and have helped me through many tough times and celebrate with me through the good times. They have also become vulnerable with me and let me into their world and I make sure I return the support. This is also a great way to grow a relationship with someone you look up to and grow the relationship into a mentorship opportunity.

Another great tip to become more vulnerable that you can use with anyone is to just ask for help. When you ask someone to help, likely they will be honoured and proud that they are useful. You’re now allowing someone to come into your world and add value and when that happens naturally they will want you to succeed.

“When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable.” – Madeleine L’Engle

I have learned these tips from experience, interviewing many successful entrepreneurs, and reading many books. A book that has influenced every tip I just gave is “Influence” by Robert Caldini. It is a must read for any entrepreneur.

Thank you for reading my article! I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below!

Eric Sciberras began his entrepreneurial journey selling items out of his school locker. His desire to grow as a businessman propelled him to start businesses in the event and nightclub, and fashion industries. His focus turned to online business when he realised its potential. He is currently founder and CEO of E Sixteen Media Inc where he helps multi-million dollar businesses and high profile entrepreneurs grow their brands online and creates his own digital products. You can check out his video content at ericsciberras.com.

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9 Comments

9 Comments

  1. Tim Denning

    Aug 7, 2015 at 10:04 am

    Eric thanks for sharing your views. I think people really get caught up in labels. If you want to be an entrepreneur then just do it and forget whether people acknowledge you as one or not.

    I have also seen that most of the negativity people give you is a direct reflection of the things in their own life that are not working. I believe that you should never get too caught up in other peoples opinions.

  2. Brenda Rachel

    Jul 26, 2015 at 7:09 pm

    I love your article Eric. I have just been on my “new” entrepreneurial journey since November 2014, as I embarked on many over the last 20 years which really tanked. I got discouraged and gave up. I am now passionate, alive and working two jobs, my day job and my “passion” job, which isn’t work at all. I totally agree with the need to be consistent, working diligently and having the commitment and dedication to keep moving forward, no matter what setbacks. I also know from firsthand experience that there are only a very few people a person living their “dream” can really trust to share their innermost thoughts and plans with. I wanted support to come from family initially and when that did not happen, I was initially disappointed and now as I am still forging ahead many months later, one of my family members is showing some interest. I have chosen to support others who are on their “dream journeys and, in turn, I am receiving so much inspiration to continue on with mine. I appreciate you sharing your expertise and knowledge. I will share this with my connections, which are about 7,000 in about 7 months! I know it will benefit others!

    • Eric Sciberras

      Aug 6, 2015 at 11:23 pm

      Thank you Brenda! Mentors or like minded people are great to share your visions with and may help in the area of support if your family has not yet given any. Wishing you much success.

  3. Jon Lee

    Jul 24, 2015 at 5:09 pm

    Hey Eric,

    This was a really great to the point post!

    I totally agree with the idea of guarding your dreams, not only might some people make fun of them but I think the more you talk about it the more you dilute your focus and intensity on it. I think it’s best to keep your dreams guarded until you’re pretty close to achieving them!.

    Thanks for posting I’m going to retweet this!

    Best,

    JL

    • Eric Sciberras

      Aug 6, 2015 at 11:20 pm

      I have found that protecting my dreams has definitely helped my focus. Telling people that do not understand can get pretty aggravating at times. Plus it’s fun to be a bit secretive until a big win.

  4. Lawrence Berry

    Jul 24, 2015 at 3:21 pm

    These are some great tips on turning negativity into support. I really like the first one you mentioned about being consistent, Consistency and constant action is one of the keys to getting what you want in life, and you absolutely right that when you first decide to become an entrepreneur, people will doubt. This is a road many people don’t travel down because they believe in getting a job and doing things like going to college and getting a job. When you are consistent, the growth will come. When people see your work and growth, they start to believe.

    • Eric Sciberras

      Aug 6, 2015 at 11:18 pm

      I definitely agree Lawrence. Thank you for the comment.

  5. Ethan Bridges

    Jul 24, 2015 at 5:39 am

    Oh my goodness, this post is talking to me.

    I love your Expert Tip. But I’d say it’d be a good move to be vulnerable from the start. Transparency can take you a long way. I agree though that vulnerability may be shown with a grain of salt. Interesting point you raised there.

    #1 is really true. I use it interchangeably with persistence. Like a quote says, it’s like driving through fog, you can only see up to where your headlights can reach.

    Eric, thank you.

    • Eric Sciberras

      Jul 24, 2015 at 3:04 pm

      Thank you for the comment Ethan. Glad you enjoyed it.

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Success Advice

How YOU Can Create a Powerful 10 Year Life Vision

Ashley Hann

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Where do you desire to be 10 years from now? Joel Brown, founder of the well-known website and podcast Addicted2Success, breaks down exactly how to gain clarity in your life and create a powerful 10-year life vision. The vision process that Joel teaches has transformed the lives of hundreds and thousands of people who use it.

You can listen to the full podcast interview here with Joel Brown or head over to my website AshleyHann.com for more inspirational podcast episodes.

Joel Brown is the real deal. He travels the world coaching thousands and thousands of people to stand in their vision so they can turn their dreams into a reality. He has been featured in the Think and Grow Rich movie, Entrepreneur, Forbes, Inc., The Huffington Post, Success Magazine and more. He has sat down with well-known thought leaders such as Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra, Jay Shetty, Gary Vaynerchuk, Grant Cardone, John Assaraf and the list goes on.

This is a MUST LISTEN episode all about gaining clarity, creating harmony in your life and creating a powerful 10-year vision so that you can live the life you’ve always wanted.

Joel Brown (Founder of Addicted2Success.com)

Joel breaks it down for you step by step. In this episode, we go over:

  • The 3 key questions you must ask yourself in order to live a fulfilled life and master your 10-year vision
  • How to define success for yourself and discover what you really want
  • The 8 areas of life to include in your 10-year vision
  • The top, prevalent patterns successful people share and why you should adopt them too
  • The 3 main limiting beliefs and bullsh*t stories that hold people back from achieving their dreams and goals
  • Why dropping perfectionism is so important and what to do instead
  • …and so much more!

If you’re more of a visual person then you can watch my video interview with Joel Brown here:

This is an episode you won’t want to miss. Joel Brown is the 10-year vision expert and teaches his vision process all over the globe to thousands and thousands of people. You’ll want to make sure to grab a pen and paper so you can take notes and action on the strategies he shares with you.

You can connect with Joel Brown @iamjoelbrown on Instagram and Twitter.  Make sure you also check out his popular motivation account @addicted2success on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and YouTube.

You can listen to the full episode on SoundCloud,Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

OR you can watch it on my YouTube Channel:

RESOURCES:

His event: www.elevatetribe.net

The #1 motivation website he built from scratch: www.addicted2success.com

His Circle of Influence online mastermind: www.iamjoelbrown.com/applynow

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Success Advice

5 Ways You Can Utilize Information Properly and Think More Efficiently

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how to think more efficiently
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The mind is a complex system of facets, of which some have yet to be discovered. Still, in spite of all this, there has been enough information to help us gain a rudimentary understanding of it. Thinking is what we all do, although what differs is the efficiency and levels at which we do it.

A lot of things influence the way you think, and most of these factors vary from person to person. However, there are some foundations and basic laws that can help you move from just filtering information and utilizing it to think efficiently.

Below are a few ways you can utilize information properly and think more efficiently:

1. Be quiet and listen

We’re constantly bombarded with information, and the nature of this information determines how we respond. Are you the type of person who doesn’t handle bad or even good news well? If so, learn to take a step back, evaluate things, and look for the way forward. It’s something that stock market traders do all the time, and it works like a charm with practice.

2. Never neglect what your emotions tell you

While a lot of people might not know this, it is true that the conscious thoughts we have only represent a small fraction of the events going on in our heads. At any given point in time, you have the unconscious aspect taking in massive amounts of information, most of which we don’t even know are being processed.

Your brain makes conclusions, good or bad, and starts to generate feelings that rule our emotions in the long-run. So, whenever you have a subtle feeling that points you to a certain course of action or thought, don’t ignore it. At the end of the day, that feeling gets its way somehow, and it’s better you come face-to-face with it and understand its nudges better.

“When you react, you let others control you. When you respond, you are in control.” – Bohdi Sanders

3. Never think while under pressure

Pressure can be good, but a lot of the time, it tends to yield counter-productive results. Regardless of what you’re doing, there are times when you feel pressure. What this pressure does is force you to rely less on the part of your unconsciousness that functions like a trained autopilot system (from all of the training and experiences that you’ve had in the past). Essentially, it forces you to overthink things.

You begin to analyze every aspect of what you’re doing, and you end up using parts of your brain that have no business with the specific activity. So, whenever you take the time out to develop a certain skill, make sure you learn to have faith in your instincts as well.

4. Never focus on one viewpoint

Bluffing is something that professional poker players do almost every time. It’s become an art. However, instead of just bluffing on a whim (which also works at times, by the way), most of them employ a simple trick while playing; they think about how the opposing players would act if they weren’t actually bluffing.

In most cases, the brain tends to search the world for filters in order to confirm the beliefs that it holds. However, the problem with this is that it tends to limit you. At the end of the day, you could be dealing with facts that are just not wrong.

“What’s true of the poker game is true of life. Most people are suckers and don’t realise it.” – Michael Faust

5. What do you love doing?

According to studies, a lot of people tend to have moments of insight and solutions to problems when they’re not even aware of the fact that the problem is being analyzed by the brain. These are usually moments when you take a stroll, listen to your favorite track, brew your favorite coffee, take showers, and read blogs; when you feel relaxed and comfortable.

This is because insightful thoughts are usually generated by an influx of neural activities that occur in the right hemisphere of the brain. The best time to plug into the mind is when you’re stress-free, so make sure that you engage in activities that relax you more often.

How do you go about maneuvering around and making decisions in a world constantly bombarding you with information? Let us know your thoughts and advice below!

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Success Advice

10 Simple Yet Effective Ways to Bring Out the Successful YouTuber in You

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YouTube is a social media platform that has turned many a normal person into a celebrity. With over 1.9 billion logged-in users visiting YouTube every month, it is a hugely popular platform that is being actively used by people who are leveraging its reach and popularity for reputation building, increasing visibility, creating and driving brand reach and last but not the least, earning money.

We keep hearing success stories of YouTube influencers who were nobodies when they started out and today run some of the most popular channels on YouTube and are considered reputed influencers in their niche.

There is absolutely no doubt that if done right, a presence on YouTube can be a massive boost for your brand (if you are a business) and ensure visibility of stratospheric proportions (if you are an individual).

But, at the end of it all, most people want to get onboard YouTube for the money. If your channel is popular enough, it can be a regular source of income for you. So, how do you become a successful YouTuber and establish a popular YouTube channel?

Here are ten great tips to help you on your way:

1. Identify your YouTube Goals

What do you want to achieve out of YouTube? Straight off the block, this is the question you must answer. YouTube can help build your brand, both business and personal, if that’s your goal. It will help improve your reputation and differentiate yourself from the competition. It could also become a revenue generation medium for you.

There are many reasons you might want to start a YouTube channel, and you need to zero in on the right one. Identifying your core goal or set of goals will help you plan your YouTube journey effectively.

2. Identify the Right Niche for Your Channel

Making videos is a resource-intensive activity. It also needs a rare degree of passion to make videos because you are going to put a truckload of effort into it. So, make sure to zero in on the right niche for your channel, meaning the kind of video content you are going to post. If you are an individual, the content must align with your interest, preferences, skill sets and knowledge.

If you are a business, it must align with your business’s services or domain. Think very carefully whether you will be able to keep making videos about a specific topic, subject or domain regularly. This will help you choose the right ‘content type’ for your channel.

3. Trust Yourself

There are some YouTubers who give up because they think they are not cut out to be successful YouTubers. There is absolutely no doubt, you will be wracked by self-doubt when you start, especially if your videos aren’t finding enough traction. The key here is to have confidence in your ability and pursuing your end goal indefatigably.

Don’t give up because of setbacks; some of the top YouTubers started off slowly and built their audience steadily. When it comes to YouTube, it is important to understand that success won’t come easily or quickly.

4. Be Prepared for Criticism

As a YouTuber, you have the ability to showcase your knowledge and skillsets to the world, but this also sets you up for criticism. There are people who are going to like your videos and there are those who won’t and will go a step further and criticize it through the comments section.

And very often, this criticism isn’t constructive and its only aim is to make fun of you and your video. Can you handle this criticism? You must if you want to be a successful YouTuber. Try developing a thick skin and don’t allow even the most virulent criticism to affect you.

5. Respond to Comments

Make it a habit to respond to comments, irrespective of whether these appreciate or criticize your video. Your response tells your viewer that you care and are prepared to listen to their views. This helps you build a relationship with your viewers who can then turn into channel subscribers. Don’t think YouTube videos are one-way traffic wherein you make a video, a viewer sees it and forgets about it. A video is a means of driving interaction and engagement.

6. Follow other YouTubers

You might have some great content ideas for your channel, but you must also keep track of what other YouTubers are doing. There is always a chance that you will get some inspiration from their videos as to how to make a video more interesting, get the lowdown on audience engagement tactics and find technical aspects as well including camera work, audio etc.

7. Attend Meetups

There are plenty of YouTube meetups, conventions and conferences happening all over the world; it is imperative that you attend YouTube events happening in your region. This way you will be able to meet fellow YouTubers in the region, and who knows, you might also meet YouTubers, you follow and want to emulate. If you get the opportunity to discuss notes or get tips, do so. This will help refine your channel content

8. Keep Measuring Your Performance

Start measuring your YouTube performance from the word go. You need to keep track of various performance metrics to know how well you have done. A metric like ‘views’ is super important but so is ‘watch time’. ouTube judges the performance of your channel on various metrics and uses these to rank your videos in search results. There are plenty of tools that can help you track and measure YouTube performance based on various parameters.

9. Don’t Judge Yourself Too Harshly

Don’t set impossible standards for yourself. You are going to make mistakes and learn from them. No video is perfect and don’t think you can start making amazingly successful videos from day one. So, judge yourself, but don’t go overboard. Don’t compare your work with people who have many years of YouTube experience behind them; this would be counterproductive and play havoc with your confidence levels.

10. Keep at It

If you want to bring out the successful YouTuber in you, you must keep at it. Plan a video publishing schedule and stick to it, irrespective of whether your videos are doing well or not. Remember, once you set cadence, you will get better at your videos, and this will drive more engagement.

A successful YouTuber is no different from a successful person. You need to work hard, learn from mistakes, and more importantly learn from others. And you must make use of all this learning to create better and more more engaging videos.

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Success Advice

Why You Should Prefer Emails to Phone Calls if You Want to Be More Productive

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“Email” and “productivity” rarely go together in a sentence. Emails have been declared as one of our largest time wasters. A McKinsey report stated that people spend around 2.6 hours each day responding to emails. That’s 13 hours a week, 52 hours a month and over 60 days a year! Imagine what you could’ve achieved in 60 days!

Emails also negatively affect our cognitive resources. When we think of responding to them while doing other important tasks, it takes up to 23 minutes and 15 seconds after being disrupted to return to full attention to a current task. Imagine how much our cognition and productivity gets fractured when we get distracted over and over again.

Constant emailing also drains us mentally. And at the end of a day, we realize that we’ve achieved nothing worth mentioning. With a phone call, you can sort issues and solve problems quickly, right? In theory, you’re right. But we live in a practical world where many variables come into play.

Below are three variables that make phone calls adversely affect our productivity, and why emails are a better alternative:

1. Wasting Time

Most “five-minute conversations” can quickly turn into 35-minute calls because people ramble about irrelevant aspects. This derailment, several times a day, severely limits the limited time and energy you have for important tasks.

Emails, on the other hand, force writers to streamline their thoughts and stick to the point. Emails can save you plenty of time and energy because you avoid lengthy phone calls. The constant strife to keep your own emails short and crisp also makes you a clearer thinker, which rewards you in other aspects of your life.

“It’s better to waste money, than it is to waste time. You can always get more money.” – Hal Sparks

2. Inaccurate Responses

An unexpected phone call can catch me caught off guard on a topic. I might respond emotionally or give an answer that doesn’t do justice to what I want to share. In a world dominated by panic buttons and fire-fighting, these don’t just stress me out but the caller as well.

Emails give me flexibility to prepare a coherent response and share it when I’m satisfied. If I feel a surge of emotion, I can sleep over the thought and share a better (more rational) response the next day. Many page-long email responses to emails that upset me have turned into a simple “thank you for your email” the next day.

3. Constant Back-and-Forth

Phone calls often are ineffective to solve business problems. Accounting for multiple people, their views, their timelines… One phone call can quickly turn into three.

Emails are quicker and more effective than even conference calls. They let you communicate with multiple people at the same time. You can share information, assign tasks and give status updates while being as specific as possible.

You must be wondering, “What about back-and-forth emails then? Why do we waste precious time on them?” Yes, email has earned a bad rap. But it’s not because of the medium; it’s because we handle it ineffectively.

A Better Approach to Emailing

For most people, constantly refreshing the inbox is part of the daily to-do list. It keeps them busy and gives them a kick of dopamine – the feel-good chemical.

Ironically, this quest to remain busy makes people compromise on taking action that can move them forward. Using emails prudently, rewards you with plenty of energy and mind space to focus on tasks that truly matter.

Here are three steps that benefited me without succumbing to the side effects of email:

1. Checking Them Less

I check emails just 3 times a day – at 9:30 AM, 12:00 PM, and 4:30 PM. If you don’t have the luxury to do the same, you can start by checking your emails for ten minutes at the end of each hour. Most senders expect a response in a little over an hour. So they won’t mind a slightly delayed response. This gives you 45 undisturbed minutes each hour to work on your core tasks.

2. Responding Quickly

People delay responding to emails at least 37% of the time, which turns finding emails and responding to them into additional tasks that cost time and lead to attention residue. Most emails take under two minutes to respond. When you can respond to an email, do so instead of putting it off. This won’t just put your mind at peace, it’ll also reduce the number of “did-you-see-this” follow-up emails in your inbox.

“I do love email. Wherever possible I try to communicate asynchronously. I’m really good at email.” – Elon Musk

3. The If-Then Technique

The If-Then technique helps you address multiple scenarios at once. For instance, an email that says, “Can we meet at 3:00 PM?” becomes, “Can we meet at 3:00 PM? If not, please advise three other times that work for you.”

This technique is also effective when you want to suggest ideas or provide instructions on alternative steps. For example, “Here’s Plan A. If it doesn’t work, connect with [name] and ask for [specific information]. If you don’t get what you need, inform me.”

I’ll admit. This sounds like more work in the current moment, but it drastically cuts down the number of trail mails, confused correspondences, and fire-fighting instances that occur due to miscommunication.

The If-Then formula is the single most effective technique I’ve learned from The 4-Hour Workweek. All of this doesn’t mean that you abandon phone calls, In fact, it’s better to use the phone for sensitive topics or if an email conversation gets dragged. But remain mindful to not let phone calls waste your time.

If you want to pursue a meaningful life, place a premium on your time. Do things that create time for you to pursue meaningful actions and avoid doing what pulls you away from them. In the knowledge economy, this is the key to success.

Do you prefer email or talking on the phone? Share your thoughts below!

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