Success Advice
3 Must-Haves For Increasing Your Self-Esteem

Why are your successes never enough to outweigh the failure you fear and take so personally?
This fear has planted roots in your psyche and eroded your self-esteem. It cripples your thinking and overshadows everything you do.
What you and most people don’t understand is that success is personal.
Unless you make it personal, you’ll be stuck forever in the tracks your fear has laid down.
When I finally realized the biggest barrier to my success was me, I honestly didn’t know what to do.
For too many years, my success had depended on getting recognized for my contributions as I helped other people become successful. It took me a while to realize that my unquenchable need for their approval had screwed up my self-esteem.
Too bad I didn’t realize that before starting my own business.
Learning to Get Out of Your Own Way
It wasn’t just the business failure though – I had failed myself. Going to work for someone else again would have been another kind of failure.
I had to figure out how to move forward differently.
To do that, I had to accept failure as the great information provider it is, instead of a personal reflection of me.
In doing that I came to understand the personal nature of success.
The 3 Must-Haves I Discovered That Will Up Your Self-Esteem and Drive Your Success
Because success is personal – you must get personal with yourself.
In building up my self-esteem, I had to rethink how I looked at myself. That’s what you’ll need to do too.
These exercises will have you becoming less outwardly focused, and more self-aware, in a good, non-obsessive way.
They are the necessary steps for changing your motivation from fear to one that will have you manifesting a success that is uniquely yours.
Must-Have #1: Good Control Over Your Inner Critic
No one is harder on you than you. One of the biggest barriers to your success is all the negative self-talk your inner critic inflicts on you.
It affects not only how you think about yourself (self-esteem), but also how you think about what you do (self-worth.)
Too much negativity and your inner critic harps on all your real or imagined failings. You need to get that ongoing barrage of abuse under control.
Controlling Your Inner Critic
How do you do it?
Ridicule.
Seriously, when your inner critic starts dumping on you:
- Turn it into a figure of fun.
- Laugh at it! Laugh at what it says about you.
- Imagine how ridiculous it looks, and take that look to the extreme.
I see my inner critic as a bulldog – with a bright pink ruff around its neck. Just picturing it shrinking down and sitting in one of those fancy little teacups makes me laugh.
Why does this work?
By taking control of your interactions with your inner critic, you’re stepping out of the role of being its victim. Taking control is a positive step that ups your self-esteem.
The more you interrupt your inner critic’s patterns of negativity, the easier it is to change what you think about yourself.
“To dream by night is to escape your life. To dream by day is to make it happen.” – Stephen Richards
Must-Have #2: Willingness to Embrace Your Weaknesses
Criticizing yourself for having weaknesses, over-compensating for them, or blaming them for your failures actually gets in the way of your success.
This must-have is about looking at them and yourself with compassion. Just believing you deserve such kindness is a great boost to your self-esteem.
Embracing Your Weaknesses
So what do you do?
Switch from a criticizing mindset to one that looks for improvements. Accept both your strengths and weaknesses.
This is how you start:
- Identify where you can make small changes that have a positive impact.
- Start by going for easy wins.
- Get the changes locked-in, and move onto the next ones.
When you disparage parts of yourself, you create internal conflicts and end up focusing on fixing the wrong things.
Why does this work?
There are three primary reasons why this works:
- Small changes add up and create larger impacts.
- One success builds on another.
- Doing positive things for yourself adds to your feelings of self-worth, and ups your self-esteem.
When I did this, I saw where I could make changes to my business model. The result? More opportunities for success, and more trust in myself.
“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” – Jim Ryun
Must-Have #3: An Old-Fashioned “Fly By The Seat of Your Pants” Attitude
The first planes were essentially physical extensions of the pilots. The actions the fliers took were limited, purposeful and focused on achieving the desired outcome.
There’s nothing like life or death situations for giving purpose and meaning to what you do.
What you need to have is the same attitude as the old-fashioned pilots. Don’t make a move that doesn’t have the express purpose of getting you one step closer to success.
Getting This Focused Attitude
How do you get it?
Start by answering this question: What do you value and how do you want to be manifesting, feeling, and expressing those values to the world?
Then expand your answer by completing these 3 steps:
- Identify your self-chosen ideals, the ones that resonate with you.
- Translate them to specific value statements for all areas of your life: family, health, financial, spiritual, community, etc.
- Determine what you want to manifest and express to the world about your values.
Taking this advice that comes from Jack Canfield helped me consolidate the changes I was making, and increased my focus. Doing this work helps you build the foundation of your success.

Why does this work?
It’s about connecting the dots between your thinking, feelings, and beliefs. When you’re done, you have an integrated picture of who you are and clarity on what you value.
This is where success gets personal.
This is where you clearly define what success means to you.
This is where you get your ongoing motivation for manifesting your success.
How The 3 Must-Haves Work Together To Up Your Self-Esteem and Drive Your Success
It takes a healthy self-esteem to put yourself out there in a way that is uniquely personal to you.
A mindset that looks for improvements helps you handle setbacks and failures, in a positive way.
The right attitude keeps the focus on what you value and how you express those values. It’s what pulls all the pieces together and gets everything you do pointing in the same direction.
When that happens, you know what advice to follow, what programs to use, and what steps to implement.
“The mind is a powerful thing. It can take you through walls.” – Denis Avey
This Is Your Personal Brand of Success
It’s all about you and how you’re expressing and manifesting what you want in your life.
It’s what I’m doing in mine. Finally, for the first time in my life, I’m living and expressing what I value through the work I’ve chosen to do.
Having control over your life and your success in this way is enormously empowering – and more than worth all the effort.
Start at the beginning. Do all the exercises. Take a good look at what you value and how you want to express it.
That’s the success you want.
That’s the success you’ll create.
That’s the success you’ll drive right through the roof.
Here’s to your success!
Success Advice
Why One-Size-Fits-All Leadership Will Always Fail (and What Works Instead)
The surprising truth about leadership styles that can make or break your team’s success.

Leadership has always been as much about people as it is about performance. Ken Blanchard, in his influential book, “The One Minute Manager”, put it simply: different strokes for different folks. (more…)
Success Advice
What Every New CEO Must Do in Their First 100 Days (or Risk Failure)
Your first 100 days as CEO could define your entire legacy, here’s how to make every move count

When Tim Cook took over from Steve Jobs at Apple, the world watched with bated breath. Jobs wasn’t just a CEO; he was a visionary, an icon, and a legend of innovative leadership. (more…)
Entrepreneurs
The Leadership Shift Every Company Needs in 2025
Struggling to keep your team engaged? Here’s how leaders can turn frustrated employees into loyal advocates.

In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”
While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.
Why This Gap Exists
Every workplace needs someone to guide, supervise, and provide feedback. That’s essential for productivity and performance. But because there are usually far more employees than managers, dissatisfaction, fair or not, spreads quickly.
What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.
Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap
Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.
1. Practice Mutual Empathy
Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.
2. Maintain Professional Boundaries
Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.
3. Follow the Golden Rule
Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.
4. Avoid Micromanagement
Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.
5. Empower Employees to Grow
Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.
6. Communicate in All Directions
Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.
7. Overcome Insecurities
Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.
8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship
True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.
9. Eliminate Favoritism
Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.
10. Recognize Efforts Promptly
Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.
11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews
When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.
12. Provide Leadership Development
Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.
13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles
Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.
The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role
Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:
-
Build diverse talent pipelines
-
Embrace flexible work models
-
Design compelling career paths
-
Simplify HR processes
-
Redefine the value HR brings
The challenge? Employers and employees often view these priorities differently. Bridging that perception gap is just as important as bridging the relational gap between leaders and staff.
Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff
When you treat employees like partners, they bring their best selves to work. HR leaders must develop strategies to keep talent engaged, empowered, and prepared for the future.
Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.
Entrepreneurs
What Makes an Entrepreneurial Leader? Traits of the World’s Best Innovators
Inside the mindset of entrepreneurial leaders who transform risk, passion, and vision into world-changing results.

When you think of Richard Branson (Virgin Group), Bill Gates (Microsoft), Steve Jobs (Apple), Rupert Murdoch (News Corporation), and Ted Turner (CNN), one thing becomes clear: they are not just entrepreneurs, they are entrepreneurial leaders. (more…)
-
Personal Development4 weeks ago
Discipline Creates Freedom: Why Systems Make Success Sustainable
-
Change Your Mindset4 weeks ago
Why Ideas Are More Valuable Than Resources for Entrepreneurial Success
-
Entrepreneurs3 weeks ago
Building a Business Empire: Lessons from the World’s Boldest Entrepreneurs
-
Health & Fitness3 weeks ago
The Surprising Link Between Exercise and Higher Income
-
Entrepreneurs2 weeks ago
What Makes an Entrepreneurial Leader? Traits of the World’s Best Innovators
-
Entrepreneurs2 weeks ago
The Leadership Shift Every Company Needs in 2025
-
Change Your Mindset1 week ago
7 Goal-Setting Mistakes That Are Secretly Sabotaging Your Success
-
Success Advice5 days ago
What Every New CEO Must Do in Their First 100 Days (or Risk Failure)
22 Comments