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7 Surprising Tips For Breaking Out Of Procrastination Prison

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Okay, let’s be honest here. There’s probably something else you should be doing right now.

You should fix that leaky tap, or kick off your Spanish learning project, or start on that university assignment. You know, the one that’s due tomorrow.  At 9:00 am.

Heck, I’ve even been procrastinating on writing this blog post.  Pretty ironic, I know.

You’ve probably already tried things like “starting simple,” “breaking it down,” and “keeping yourself accountable” to take down procrastination.

But what you probably don’t know is that many counterintuitive tricks are out there that are even more effective at fighting the problem. So stay with me and procrastinate just a little while longer.

Let’s review seven surprising ways you can break out of procrastination prison.

1. Keep your goals top secret

So you’ve decided to start an exciting new project, something that will truly make your life better, and maybe make other people’s lives better too. Maybe you’re taking on Arabic, learning how to code in Java, or setting up a charity.

What’s the very next thing you want to do after making that decision? You want to tell someone about it.

It seems to make perfect sense.  You get to share your excitement with somebody else, and having others in on your plan is sure to keep you accountable, right?

Actually, research has shown that you are less likely to reach your goals if you first broadcast your intentions to other people.

Talking about your goals tricks your brain into thinking that you’ve already accomplished them and reduces the motivation required to actually execute. You get left in a state of procrastination limbo where you feel great about your goals but aren’t actually doing anything about them.  The same thing happens when you try visualizing success in your head too.

So keep your goals to yourself, put your head down, and get to it!

 

2. Don’t make a plan

You’ve probably heard the phrase “fail to plan, plan to fail.”

It sounds very logical.  Draw up a nice big roadmap, and it’ll help you navigate your way to success more easily, right? Not quite.  Because planning isn’t progress.  It’s all too easy to get stuck in the planning stage of a project and never actually get anywhere.

What you want to do instead is simply break into your project.  Start somewhere, anywhere.

Pick an entry point and decide on the first task for your project.  Break that task down until you have an action you can do right now in under two minutes. Then do it.

When I started learning Mandarin Chinese at the end of last year, I spent ages reading various blog posts, trying to discover the perfect way to learn a language.  I’ve actually done this two or three times over the last few years as I’ve started and stopped different language projects.

Even though it might seem like I was making progress and moving toward my goal, I was really just procrastinating by avoiding the important work — actually learning Chinese.

Once I realized this, I stopped and picked whatever method I happened to have on my screen at the time and ran with it.

There is no such thing as a perfect plan.  Luckily, you don’t need one.  Just find a way in, commit to it, and the rest will follow.

 

3. Begin your day with something unimportant

A common piece of productivity advice is to start your day with your most important, most urgent, or most difficult task. The rationale is that the rest of your day will feel like a breeze once you get the tough stuff out of the way first. But if you’re anything like me, seeing that big hairy task first up on your to-do list is a little, well, frightening.

So I like to take a different approach.

First, pick off some of the low-hanging fruit from your to-do list. Maybe start by doing some light fiction reading, vacuuming the house, dashing to the bank, and then taking a break by jumping onto Twitter for ten minutes.

At this stage, you’ll feel much more energized and accomplished, and you’ll be able to attack that big scary task with more confidence.

Get some easy wins under your belt first thing.  It’ll make the difficult stuff much easier to handle.

 

4. Focus on having fun first

It’s important to strike a balance in your life where you’re getting stuff done but still having fun.  After all:

“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.  All play and no work makes Jack a mere toy.”

Here’s an unconventional way to accomplish this.

First, stick all your leisure and social activities into your to-do list and spread those out throughout your day.  Then take a break from the fun stuff by doing some work in the middle. For example, I check in with my favorite YouTube channels as a daily leisure checkpoint that I work around during my day.

This is an exciting way of rethinking productivity.  You’re less likely to procrastinate because you know your day contains things you enjoy. In addition, you don’t have to feel guilty about having fun because you’ve carefully structured your day to include both work and play.

You can even take this a little further and try something you might not have done before: start your day off with a quick leisure activity to get you going (maybe a 15-minute walk at sunrise or 15 minutes of video gaming) prior to jumping into something unimportant.

 

Dream-Motivation-Picture-Quote
 

5. Make a weekly escape

One of the most common productivity tips you hear is that you should work a little bit on your goals every day. Now, this is certainly not bad advice.  Small, consistent action toward your goals is the best path to success.

But you also want to avoid burnout, something not particularly ideal to have if you’re trying to beat procrastination. Luckily, there’s an easy way to do this that I’m sure you’ll love. Take a day off each week.

Choose one day where you’re allowed to do absolutely nothing (mine is Sunday).

Keep those days as clear as possible, and cut yourself away from your projects.  It’ll give you time to recharge your batteries and mentally refresh yourself.

This is the perfect day to sleep in, catch up on that novel you’ve been meaning to read, go on a date with your partner, and watch romantic comedies together after dinner.

You’ll start looking forward to your escape day every week, pushing you to perform better, be more efficient, and procrastinate less during the other six days.

 

6. Be ruthless with your time and energy

A common cause of procrastination is sheer overwhelm.

Many of us are simply trying to juggle too many balls at once.  And the inevitable result is that we’ll drop them all. If you have a lot to do, and you simply can’t motivate yourself to do any of it, that’s a sure-fire sign you’re doing too much.

Set boundaries for your time and energy.  Re-evaluate all your commitments, and find out which ones you can eliminate. Then pull the trigger and cancel them.  It’s scary, and it’s difficult, but it’s oh so liberating.

Nowadays, it’s almost socially unacceptable to say no.  I find this really bizarre.

The result is that we say yes to everything to make everyone else happy, and make ourselves miserable in the process. Stop trying to please everyone.  It’s an impossible task.  You must make yourself happy too.

Be ruthless and start saying no to time-sucking, energy-sapping commitments, and free yourself for more important things.

 

7. Forgive yourself

Everyone procrastinates.  It’s unavoidable. You’ll have times when you just don’t feel like doing anything. And that’s okay. The worst thing you can do is beat yourself up about it.

Research has shown that people who are kind to themselves after a bout of procrastination are less likely to procrastinate again the next time. I used to be extremely hard on myself when it came to procrastinating.

I’d start the day knowing I needed to do my workout, but I’d keep pushing it off as the day progressed by doing crossword puzzles or watching cat videos instead. I’d get to the end of the day and only start working out at 11:00 pm, or not do it at all.  And I’d hate myself for it.

The next day, I’d still feel guilty about it and wouldn’t feel good at all about anything else I was doing.  It was a vicious cycle. Take a breath.  Let it go.  The past is in the past.

Forgive yourself and trust that you’ll do better next time.

 

Darren-Hardy-Picture-Quote
 

 

It’s time to break free

Procrastination is a difficult problem that everyone faces in their lives.  And busting out of procrastination prison isn’t easy.

But think about what happens if you don’t.  Think about what happens if you stayed stuck in there forever without making that daring prison escape.

Think about how you’d be feeling a month, a year, five years from now. You’d wish that you’d done the hard yards today so you could be that much closer to your goals tomorrow.

Get out there, get things done, and achieve the things you want to achieve. The world is waiting for you to do amazing things.

Don’t let everyone down.  And most importantly, don’t let yourself down.

 

Zen Dexter helps big dreamers to get unstuck, achieve their goals, and live the life they’ve always wanted. Download his free report Steer Your Ship to discover 30 questions that will navigate you towards your life's purpose.

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14 Comments

14 Comments

  1. Rashmi

    May 11, 2015 at 10:57 am

    This is definitely the most practical and best article on procrastination I had ever read. Great job!! I loved the ending lines..Dont let anyone down and yourself down.It was as if my best friend was advising me.totally awesome. I am gonna start implementing your ideas without further procrastination!

    • Zen Dexter

      May 15, 2015 at 12:22 pm

      That’s fantastic Rashmi, and thank you so much for your kind words. All the best to you on the journey ahead 🙂

  2. Mael

    Apr 16, 2015 at 3:28 pm

    This is by far the best blog about procrastination..helped me clear off my mind on some things..i do believe that over thinking has something to do with it..this is a simple and unconventional way of breaking this bad habit..thank you. ♡

    • Zen Dexter

      Apr 20, 2015 at 4:37 am

      Hello Mael, you’re welcome, thank you very much for reading!

      Overthinking can definitely make us procrastinate. Sometimes you think that a task will be long and difficult so you procrastinate. Point #2 is handy here: just find somewhere to start and do it for two minutes. Often you’ll find that it isn’t that bad after all, and by that stage you have some momentum to keep going 🙂

  3. Arjun Haridas

    Mar 22, 2015 at 6:45 am

    Hello 🙂
    First of all, the article was mind blowing,
    Not following the conventional methods
    Congrats and thank u 🙂
    One question which i would like to ask is “Do you think visualizing your goals daily is an obstacle in the pursuit of achieving them “?????

    So does that mean visualizing is an ineffective method?????

    Please share your thoughts
    Thank you in advance 🙂

    • Zen Dexter

      Mar 22, 2015 at 10:04 am

      Hello Arjun, thank you! Very happy to hear that and I’m glad you found the post useful.

      Visualizing success (‘positive visualization’) has the same sort of effect as sharing your goals with other people, robbing you of motivation and increasing procrastination. But that doesn’t mean that visualizing is completely ineffective. You can use ‘critical visualization’, where you consider failure, obstacles and all the negative things as well as the positive things. It sounds counterintuitive, but it is much more conducive to success. There is a nice Forbes article that covered this point in more detail: http://www.forbes.com/sites/daviddisalvo/2011/06/08/visualize-success-if-you-want-to-fail/

      Hope this helps 🙂

  4. Kamma Anne Dunning

    Mar 19, 2015 at 8:42 am

    Most of these articles make me roll my eyes. Tip #1 stop procrastinating! (If I could do that I wouldn’t be reading this.) The other articles also make me feel worse because this is the advice and it doesn’t work for me. If I have to do my most important/hardest thing first, then I’m going to spend my whole day watching tv. That’s the reality of the situation. I found this article refreshing because I feel like it was written by someone who actually gets this self-defeating, ridiculous habit. The strongest words for me were: “Think how you’ll feel in a month.” Ouch. That’s some real truth there. I may think I’m getting away with something by doing nothing, but I’m going to feel like a real asshole a month from now; that is a real, true statement I find motivating.

    • Zen Dexter

      Mar 20, 2015 at 6:36 am

      Hi Kamma Anne, thank you for reading, I’m glad the article’s been helpful for you! Procrastination is, like you say, a self-defeating habit, but it’s important to remember point #7 and forgive yourself for what’s happened in the past. The past is already set in stone, but you do have the power to shape your future. And that’s where doing this ‘time travel’ exercise to check how you’ll feel in a month, a year etc. can really give you a good push in the right direction. All the best to you in your endeavours!

  5. Zen Dexter

    Mar 19, 2015 at 1:43 am

    Hi Tara, thank you for reading, I’m glad you enjoyed the article! If you find that telling others about your goal helps to reduce anxiety for you, then I would recommend still doing that. But be selective with who you share it with, ideally it’ll be a small group who’ll be there to listen and support you through both the highs and lows. It’s important to discuss both highs and lows to help offset the ‘limbo effect’.

  6. Absolutely Tara

    Mar 18, 2015 at 8:39 pm

    I thought this take on procrastination was so refreshing. I thought the idea that telling people about your goal takes away the creative anxiety created by wanting the goal. I have experienced that many times. Great post. Thanks for sharing.

  7. Arslan

    Mar 18, 2015 at 1:48 pm

    Very Beautiful Article after a long time on Addicted2Success. Worth it to Read this

  8. King Lee

    Mar 18, 2015 at 11:06 am

    Comment:
    great article !

  9. Bhuvana

    Mar 18, 2015 at 7:18 am

    Nice article n different from the usual ones on Procrastination.. Its so true!! the first 2.. Everything just doesnt go the way its planned .. Getting started is more important than just stuck with planning 🙂

    • Zen Dexter

      Mar 19, 2015 at 4:32 am

      Hi Bhuvana, thank you, I’m glad you liked the article! You’re absolutely right, things often don’t go the way they’re planned. So might as well cut down on the planning, jump straight into the project, and find your way as you go!

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Motivation

Want To Be The Greatest? Publish Positivity.

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Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to be the greatest in whatever field I entered. Now I am in the top tier of bloggers on the Internet.

 

So your question surely is: “How can I do the same?”

For starters, forget who I am and what I have and haven’t done. It’s not about me; it’s about you. It all starts with you and I’m going to give you the secret.

 

The secret is: Publish positivity.

Whether that’s publishing an email and sending it off, publishing a video online, publishing a blog post, publishing a picture on Instagram.

The key is always to publish something that’s positive.

 

It’s helped me and it can help you.

Everything I have ever published on the Internet since I started this blogging journey is positive. It’s content that is designed to take your life to the next level.

I aim to send chills down your spine.
I aim to get you to think differently.
Most of all, I aim to get you to take positive action.

 

Before all of the positivity, it started with negativity.

The thing is it didn’t start this way. My journey started with a whole lot of negativity and yours is probably similar. That’s the best place to start anything from. With so much negativity, there’s only one place to go – UP!

I always thought that success was only for those born rich. My days were spent finding reasons why something couldn’t be done. I complained all day long about everything I wanted but couldn’t get. I was tired, lonely, frustrated and pissed off at the world. We’ve all been there.

Then someone inspired me by publishing positivity. Now I want to return that favor.

I want everyone to be able to become inspired and then make the same decision as me to publish positivity from now on. Enough is enough.

 

There’s already too much negativity.

I’m fed up with every traditional media outlet talking about nothing other than negativity. Consistent negativity only produces more negativity. There’s no point harping on about what’s wrong and how everything is so challenging to fix. Nothing worth doing is easy.

“If you’re trying to achieve a goal, then you have to publish positivity to stand out and influence all of us”

 

People want to be inspired.

The common theme with everything I have achieved is that I’ve figured out the one hack: People just want to be inspired. It’s really that simple. To be the greatest, you must inspire people.

We all love inspiration because it’s what we’re all lacking. Tell stories and inspire people. That’s how you become the best in the world at anything. We all have a story to tell that can inspire people. Reach inside, and pull out those stories for all of us to hear.

You’ve overcome some obstacle.
You’ve had a difficult time.
You’ve experienced death.
You’ve lost something.

The inspiration we can all learn from you is inside of you already. Use these tools to inspire us all because we all want it. We all need it.

 

You’ll become positive at the same time.

The best part about publishing positivity is that it makes you more positive at the same time. Each day, I’m searching for something positive to share with you all. This makes me so focused on being positive that I’ve forgotten about the negative world that many experience daily.

You get more of what you focus on.

“Publish positivity and you’ll steer clear of the negative nonsense that’s subconsciously holding you back from being the greatest”

 

Positivity compounds.

Yes, that’s right! As you publish positivity, the effect compounds. You start with being just a little bit positive and once you get a few years in, all the wisdom that people like Nelson Mandela had is at your disposal. Positivity builds the greatness that world champions like Nelson Mandela had.

If you want to do something extraordinary with your life (we all do deep down), then you must start with publishing positivity. Find something to talk about and do it with every ounce of passion in your body. Allow yourself to light up and become a beacon of positivity for anyone that can benefit from your advice.

 

Where does this all lead?

Publishing positivity can lead almost anywhere. I never had any clue when I began. I always thought I’d just do it for a bit and then see what happens. Little did I know that publishing positivity can get you access to people, places, opportunities, careers and feelings I never even knew.

Publishing positivity has made every single goal I’ve ever wanted come to life.
Publishing positivity has allowed me to remove my toxic friends and replace them with my heroes.

The possibilities for you when you publish positivity are the same. You’ll get to experience things that you never thought was possible,

It all starts with publishing positivity and being positive.

Don’t hold yourself back any longer. Get started and publish positivity.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Motivation

Endorphins Are The Key To The Good Life.

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Endorphins And The Good Life. Basketball Motivation

When I was 25 years old, I became a gym junkie. I went four times a week and trained hard with a personal trainer. During that time of my life, I was chasing the physical appearance benefits of going to the gym and training.

I remember feeling really good after every workout. Whenever I felt stressed or upset, going to the gym helped me.

 

Then my life crashed: I stopped.

About two years in, everything in my life went horribly wrong. I ended up leaving a business and starting all over again. I sold everything I had and so I could no longer justify paying a personal trainer. I stopped going to the gym not long after too.

 

Here’s the harsh truth.

Since that day when I quit the gym all those years ago, I’ve never felt the same. The rush that you get from putting your body under pressure and sweating profusely can’t be matched. A few weeks ago, I began reading this book that included a chapter on physical training.

The benefits were highlighted to me again. You’ll increase your endorphin levels triggering a positive response in your body; you’ll increase cardiac volume; you’ll increase insulin sensitivity and that will put you in a better mental state. Oh, and it makes you smarter too.

Endorphins make you smarter by improving blood flow to the brain and boosting growth hormones that produce new nerve cells. They even help release brain chemicals like dopamine, glutamine and serotonin. Serotonin is the chemical that makes you happy.

So obviously going to the gym and having these endorphin things are good for you. Imagine what newfound energy this will bring to your passions in life.

 

What caused me to go back to the gym?

I’d been feeling low on energy despite my healthy diet and I was getting a few headaches. This was literally killing my dreams because I didn’t have the energy I needed to write inspirational content.

 

I came home from the gym and felt on fire!

After my first session back at the gym, I came home and felt on fire. I wrote five blog posts in a matter of hours – they were some of my best work. My mental state was changed and the low energy I was experiencing went away.

 

The food I ate began to change.

When you increase the endorphin levels in your body, I found, that I no longer wanted to eat junk food. I’ve seen the same change in my friends who have gone this route as well. Training at the gym makes you want to refuel and recharge with proper food.

All of a sudden a big greasy pizza just doesn’t feel appealing anymore. You start to crave fruit, vegetables, tofu, seafood and anything that will nourish you and help you train again the next day.

I know this sounds nuts and I promise you it’s true!

 

It’s not just the endorphins.

The endorphin rush is not the only benefit I got from the gym. There were added side benefits that I didn’t even think of.

It’s the discipline you get.
It’s the goals you set.
It’s the changes you see.
It’s the people you meet at the gym.

 

What starts to happen is that you become focused on being just that little bit better each day. Instead of staying the same and not growing in any way, your mindset changes.

“You look for ways to improve your life and the gym becomes the catalyst for it”

It’s only after some deep, meditative thought that I came to this conclusion. Lucky I read that book hey?

 

And wait, there’s more.

I started to smile more. With my mental state changing for the better, I no longer found myself disappointed or pissed off for not having the energy I craved, to live my life.

With all of this extra thinking space, I found myself smiling more. Looking after yourself feels good. If nothing else, it gives you something to be happy about.

 

Anger and stress decreased.

During the first week of gym training, I had a few negative situations I was dealing with at work.

They were really annoying me and I found myself being angry.

This anger led to stress that I hadn’t experienced for a while.

“The gym became an outlet for me to get out of my own head because I was forced to concentrate on the pain and focus needed to do the exercises I had committed to”

Combining the gym with a bit of meditation also helped too.

 

Don’t forget that three letter word (you thought I was going to say Tim but I mean sex baby!)

So far I’ve only spoken about the gym – don’t forget sex as well. Sex releases endorphins. If you want more endorphins, then have more sex!

Now you have two sources of endorphins to play with (pardon the pun).

 

***Final thought***

I know what you’re thinking – because I am Gandhi (joking) – “Tim I already knew all of this. Of course going to the gym is good for you.”

That’s the issue right there. We know lots of stuff and most of the time we still don’t take action on what is good for us. The best way to take action on tasks like going to the gym is to hear someone else’s story.

Stories will inspire you to take action, not knowledge.

Now you’ve heard my story, it’s time to take action. Drag your ass to the gym and start exercising. Don’t forget to sexercise as well (insert wink emoji here)!

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Motivation

Starting The Morning By Making Your Bed Is Stupid – Do This Instead

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Making Your Bed

Ever heard that you should start your morning by completing one small task like making your bed?

This is stupid advice. Don’t follow it.

If you feel like you have achieved something by making your bed, then you’re way off.

Making your bed is a stupid little task that doesn’t make you feel good at all. If you find satisfaction in doing something so small, and you think that’s a good start, it’s not.

“You must do something meaningful to start the day if you want to change the world”

 

Start the morning with something big.

Yup, that’s what I said you little rascal. Do something that matters. For me, that’s writing blog posts like this one, instead of doing chicken little tasks that don’t serve anybody – like making your bed. I recommend starting the day with an epic achievement.

Sit down and write something you are proud of.
Go and train for that sport you love.
Prepare that presentation that is going to change your company.
Wake up and do public speaking first thing.

Now that last one is one I do every fortnight. I wake up at 4 am and go to Toastmasters at 7 am to start the day with a speech. It sets up my entire week and gives me energy. Try it for yourself.

 

Your mind is fresh in the morning – don’t waste it.

As the day moves on, your energy levels get lower (especially if you have a poor diet). This is why starting your day by wasting your valuable energy making your bed is total nonsense!

Don’t make your bed, use your energy for something that will make you fulfilled.
Start the day with something that will make you damn proud of yourself.

When I publish a freshly written article on Adccited2Success at 5 am, I feel on fire. I get to work ready to steamroll over anyone who wants to take me off my purpose. I feel like a lion ready to pounce on its prey and fight any enemy that presents itself.

 

Your bed can wait.

You know what? Your bed can wait. It doesn’t need to be made right this second. You can do hard labor when you get home and you’re tired from the day. Making your bed requires no thinking so don’t waste your mind on it.

“Low energy states are the best time to make your bed, iron your clothes and cook meals”

 

Achieving goals builds momentum.

The reason why I don’t want you to start your day achieving rubbish goals is that it gives you no momentum. Doing something difficult in the morning sets your day up to tackle even more challenging obstacles.

I’d rather you did the big stuff first and then worried about the small stuff like how your rainbow colored doona on your bed looks. Who you trying to impress with your bed anyway?

 

Some days will suck.

Okay, so I’ve made it sound like every day you are going to live like a commando or even GI Joe. Don’t worry I’m not that silly or crazy. There are days that you will suck. You’ll wake up and achieve nothing. You’ll do dumb stuff like make your bed instead of doing something a bit more difficult.

It’s okay. You can’t be Rambo every single day or hour. What I want you to think about here is to spend the majority of your week in a peak state that involves attempting meaningful goals in the morning. Miss a day here and there. Take the weekend off.

Relax, because you can’t always be on like a pit bull ready to attack.

“If you take yourself too seriously, then you’ll start to lose the plot. Your ego will become out of control and you’ll think you are unstoppable and do something dumb like taking a selfie on the side of a skyscraper where you could fall to your death. Don’t laugh; this is now a thing!”

Everything in moderation. You also need balance. Don’t mistake balance, though, for being lazy and doing half-assed stuff like making your bed.

 

Mornings have defined me.

I get dozens of emails asking how I find time to write and do all the crazy things I talk about.

My response is always the morning. Doing big stuff in the morning has allowed me to get a head start on life. I will not accept mediocrity and even when it hurts, I do my best to remember why I put myself through these challenges, day after day.

There’s something about progress that is addictive and it’s a big part of the success formula. The first thing you do shouldn’t be:

– Make coffee
– Drink lemon water
– Look at your phone
– Check your social media followers.

The first thing you should do is bite a chunk off one of your big audacious goals that forms part of your life’s purpose. Now feel free to substitute the word purpose for vision, goals, meaning of your life – I don’t care amigo.

 

Again, do the big stuff.

Let’s rinse and repeat, so you’re clear. Don’t wake up and do little, tiny, meaningless goals like making your bed and wasting the best hours of the day. Wake up and do something that will give you a sense of fulfillment.

Hope we’re clear now. Time to go do the big stuff. The really big stuff!

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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Motivation

Do You Really Want Your Goal?

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I was talking to someone I know about their dating experiences. Dating was something that she always had as a goal, but for a long time, she has been single.

She got frustrated when I shared what has worked for me and my experience. I wanted to understand why she hadn’t got to her goal. “I mean if you want something bad enough then what’s stopping you?” I thought to myself.

 

Dreaming is not enough.

She knew what she wanted and she fantasized about it but she had already made a decision not to take action. Thinking about how nice it would be to sit on the beach with the love of your life will not make you happy.

If you want a business do it.
If you want to find love, then do it.
If you want to travel then do it.
If you want to inspire people, then do it.

What’s the point of having a goal if it never becomes a reality? Making a decision is the first step to any goal and then taking action without knowing the result is the next step. Analytical thinking can often distract you from getting started. Having a crystal clear plan is almost never necessary. I wish I could tell you what the love of your life looks like. I can’t.

 

Exaggerating combined with excuses doesn’t work.

This girl I knew exaggerated every aspect of dating. She would say:

“There are no good guys left.”
“People are so harsh these days.”
“Guys are lazy.”
“Online dating doesn’t work.”

“Excuses are like cancer running through your body. It’s easy to find everything that is wrong with the goal you want to achieve”

Of course, stuff is hard….life is hard. What you’ll learn though is that when you do the hard stuff towards your goal, you get the results and feel awesome about it at the same time.

Tell the world why you are going to achieve your goal – don’t tell us why you won’t. What you tell us about your goal ends up becoming the result.

 

Drunk on comparing.

Next, she told me all about how her friends all got the man they wanted and how it was so easy for them. Nothing is easy for any of us. When we commit to putting in the work, we get closer to our goal. The universe doesn’t owe you jack so forget about serendipity, luck and anything that is not based on you getting off your ass and working.

Getting drunk on comparing only distracts you from your own challenge. Everyone’s life story is different and there are no absolutes. The life you think everyone else has that is so wonderful is all an illusion. You don’t see these people you idolize 24 hours a day.

If you did, what you’d see is all the parts of their life they hate. We are all carrying huge problems on our shoulders. My advice to you would be to not focus on these problems. Focus on what you can do to move forward and spend zero time thinking about everyone else who tells you how happy they are.

 

Lacking energy and motivation.

She tells me she is uninspired and lacking energy. My view is that if you avoid your goal and put it off, you’ll end up feeling this way. To say something is a goal and then say it’s okay if you never achieve it is going to guarantee you failure. That’s exactly what she did.

She told me that she is prepared to face the fact she will never find a man. The moment there is a Plan B, you start telling yourself it’s okay. It’s not okay. If you want this goal, then go after it and never give up. Yes, it will take many tough decision and risks to get to your “Happy Place, ” but it’s worth every bit of pain.

The lack of motivation you face is often tied to your goals.

“When you don’t make progress towards your goal, you start to lose sight of the meaning for your life”

It’s not the end of the world though because you can always change your ways and get back on track.

The energy you need to feel alive again is inside of you. All you need is to feel bad enough about your situation to decide change is a must. When achieving your goal is non-negotiable, and nothing else matters, things start to change in your favor.

 

Feeling lonely.

Of course you will feel lonely if you don’t work towards your goal. Being sad and depressed is not a state of mind that will attract people into your life. No one wants to be around this type of person for a long time.

If you don’t like being lonely, then do something about it! You’re lonely because you’re obsessed with yourself and your selfish desires. Move out of that place and into a place of abundance and caring, and your circumstances will change.

The girl in my story is lonely because she doesn’t have a man. She refuses to do something about it and so she get’s what she settles for. There are billions of people on this planet so it’s nearly impossible to be lonely if you decide you don’t want to be.

When you suffer negative feelings, you can decide to make a stand. You can always decide that enough is enough and you’re going to break the pattern of your own limiting thoughts. It’s your thoughts that are limiting you not the world around you.

 

Assumptions are a curse.

The last thing this girl did was assume until she’d left no space to make anything happen. Assumptions make you think you have all the answers and there’s no more research required. Assumptions tell you that you’re very smart when in fact you’re acting like an idiot.

Not trying something because you think you know the outcome is the ultimate failure. You can’t possibly know how every experiment will turn out beforehand so stop trying to. Don’t sit there and tell me that you’ve tried everything to achieve your goal because you damn well haven’t.

You’ve decided to be a sook and let this negative world win because you’re hoping some third party is going to save the day.

You’re hoping that someone else is going to do the work for you and solve all your problems. You’re hoping that someone will feel sorry for you.

Only you can save yourself. The rest of us are trying to save ourselves from our own problems and challenges. This leaves the entitled person out in the cold searching for answers that don’t exist.

There is hope for you.
There are answers within you if you look for them.
Try Self Improvement. Read a few books.

Stop falling in love with the curse that is “assumptions.”

 

***Final thought***

When I hear stories like the one I’ve just shared, I often wonder whether people really want their goals. I think that goals have become a form of convenience to romanticise about something that will probably never happen.

If you really want your goal then take action. Throw your assumptions and excuses in the bin.

Stop settling for second best. Make a decision today to go after that thing you want so badly. Give yourself time to get the results. Most of all, help others in the process.

That’s how you get your goal ladies and gentleman. Ask yourself again: “Do I really want this goal?”
If so, get to work.

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37 Joe Rogan Quotes That Will Motivate You to Greatness

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Joe Rogan is a stand-up comedian, a figure in the MMA space, and former host of Fear Factor.  But Rogan is more recognized his famous podcast The Joe Rogan Experience which is at the top of many iTunes charts.  Each week, Joe Rogan sits down with a public figure to have a raw conversation to discuss their story, passions, and life in general.  These people range from actors & scientists, to controversial figures in the news.  Rogan is well known for dropping knowledge bombs in his show and is respected & looked up to by people in a variety of spaces as a motivational & inspirational figure. (more…)

Joe Kleckner has a passion for all things motivation & self-development.  From blogs such as Addicted2Success, to the videos of Eric Thomas and Elliott Hulse, to the lectures of legends such as Tony Robbins.  This passion has landed him an internship with Addicted2Success. Follow him on Twitter & Snapchat as he journeys towards greatness, one day at a time.

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14 Comments

14 Comments

  1. Rashmi

    May 11, 2015 at 10:57 am

    This is definitely the most practical and best article on procrastination I had ever read. Great job!! I loved the ending lines..Dont let anyone down and yourself down.It was as if my best friend was advising me.totally awesome. I am gonna start implementing your ideas without further procrastination!

    • Zen Dexter

      May 15, 2015 at 12:22 pm

      That’s fantastic Rashmi, and thank you so much for your kind words. All the best to you on the journey ahead 🙂

  2. Mael

    Apr 16, 2015 at 3:28 pm

    This is by far the best blog about procrastination..helped me clear off my mind on some things..i do believe that over thinking has something to do with it..this is a simple and unconventional way of breaking this bad habit..thank you. ♡

    • Zen Dexter

      Apr 20, 2015 at 4:37 am

      Hello Mael, you’re welcome, thank you very much for reading!

      Overthinking can definitely make us procrastinate. Sometimes you think that a task will be long and difficult so you procrastinate. Point #2 is handy here: just find somewhere to start and do it for two minutes. Often you’ll find that it isn’t that bad after all, and by that stage you have some momentum to keep going 🙂

  3. Arjun Haridas

    Mar 22, 2015 at 6:45 am

    Hello 🙂
    First of all, the article was mind blowing,
    Not following the conventional methods
    Congrats and thank u 🙂
    One question which i would like to ask is “Do you think visualizing your goals daily is an obstacle in the pursuit of achieving them “?????

    So does that mean visualizing is an ineffective method?????

    Please share your thoughts
    Thank you in advance 🙂

    • Zen Dexter

      Mar 22, 2015 at 10:04 am

      Hello Arjun, thank you! Very happy to hear that and I’m glad you found the post useful.

      Visualizing success (‘positive visualization’) has the same sort of effect as sharing your goals with other people, robbing you of motivation and increasing procrastination. But that doesn’t mean that visualizing is completely ineffective. You can use ‘critical visualization’, where you consider failure, obstacles and all the negative things as well as the positive things. It sounds counterintuitive, but it is much more conducive to success. There is a nice Forbes article that covered this point in more detail: http://www.forbes.com/sites/daviddisalvo/2011/06/08/visualize-success-if-you-want-to-fail/

      Hope this helps 🙂

  4. Kamma Anne Dunning

    Mar 19, 2015 at 8:42 am

    Most of these articles make me roll my eyes. Tip #1 stop procrastinating! (If I could do that I wouldn’t be reading this.) The other articles also make me feel worse because this is the advice and it doesn’t work for me. If I have to do my most important/hardest thing first, then I’m going to spend my whole day watching tv. That’s the reality of the situation. I found this article refreshing because I feel like it was written by someone who actually gets this self-defeating, ridiculous habit. The strongest words for me were: “Think how you’ll feel in a month.” Ouch. That’s some real truth there. I may think I’m getting away with something by doing nothing, but I’m going to feel like a real asshole a month from now; that is a real, true statement I find motivating.

    • Zen Dexter

      Mar 20, 2015 at 6:36 am

      Hi Kamma Anne, thank you for reading, I’m glad the article’s been helpful for you! Procrastination is, like you say, a self-defeating habit, but it’s important to remember point #7 and forgive yourself for what’s happened in the past. The past is already set in stone, but you do have the power to shape your future. And that’s where doing this ‘time travel’ exercise to check how you’ll feel in a month, a year etc. can really give you a good push in the right direction. All the best to you in your endeavours!

  5. Zen Dexter

    Mar 19, 2015 at 1:43 am

    Hi Tara, thank you for reading, I’m glad you enjoyed the article! If you find that telling others about your goal helps to reduce anxiety for you, then I would recommend still doing that. But be selective with who you share it with, ideally it’ll be a small group who’ll be there to listen and support you through both the highs and lows. It’s important to discuss both highs and lows to help offset the ‘limbo effect’.

  6. Absolutely Tara

    Mar 18, 2015 at 8:39 pm

    I thought this take on procrastination was so refreshing. I thought the idea that telling people about your goal takes away the creative anxiety created by wanting the goal. I have experienced that many times. Great post. Thanks for sharing.

  7. Arslan

    Mar 18, 2015 at 1:48 pm

    Very Beautiful Article after a long time on Addicted2Success. Worth it to Read this

  8. King Lee

    Mar 18, 2015 at 11:06 am

    Comment:
    great article !

  9. Bhuvana

    Mar 18, 2015 at 7:18 am

    Nice article n different from the usual ones on Procrastination.. Its so true!! the first 2.. Everything just doesnt go the way its planned .. Getting started is more important than just stuck with planning 🙂

    • Zen Dexter

      Mar 19, 2015 at 4:32 am

      Hi Bhuvana, thank you, I’m glad you liked the article! You’re absolutely right, things often don’t go the way they’re planned. So might as well cut down on the planning, jump straight into the project, and find your way as you go!

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Motivation

Want To Be The Greatest? Publish Positivity.

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Ever since I was a kid, I wanted to be the greatest in whatever field I entered. Now I am in the top tier of bloggers on the Internet.

 

So your question surely is: “How can I do the same?”

For starters, forget who I am and what I have and haven’t done. It’s not about me; it’s about you. It all starts with you and I’m going to give you the secret.

 

The secret is: Publish positivity.

Whether that’s publishing an email and sending it off, publishing a video online, publishing a blog post, publishing a picture on Instagram.

The key is always to publish something that’s positive.

 

It’s helped me and it can help you.

Everything I have ever published on the Internet since I started this blogging journey is positive. It’s content that is designed to take your life to the next level.

I aim to send chills down your spine.
I aim to get you to think differently.
Most of all, I aim to get you to take positive action.

 

Before all of the positivity, it started with negativity.

The thing is it didn’t start this way. My journey started with a whole lot of negativity and yours is probably similar. That’s the best place to start anything from. With so much negativity, there’s only one place to go – UP!

I always thought that success was only for those born rich. My days were spent finding reasons why something couldn’t be done. I complained all day long about everything I wanted but couldn’t get. I was tired, lonely, frustrated and pissed off at the world. We’ve all been there.

Then someone inspired me by publishing positivity. Now I want to return that favor.

I want everyone to be able to become inspired and then make the same decision as me to publish positivity from now on. Enough is enough.

 

There’s already too much negativity.

I’m fed up with every traditional media outlet talking about nothing other than negativity. Consistent negativity only produces more negativity. There’s no point harping on about what’s wrong and how everything is so challenging to fix. Nothing worth doing is easy.

“If you’re trying to achieve a goal, then you have to publish positivity to stand out and influence all of us”

 

People want to be inspired.

The common theme with everything I have achieved is that I’ve figured out the one hack: People just want to be inspired. It’s really that simple. To be the greatest, you must inspire people.

We all love inspiration because it’s what we’re all lacking. Tell stories and inspire people. That’s how you become the best in the world at anything. We all have a story to tell that can inspire people. Reach inside, and pull out those stories for all of us to hear.

You’ve overcome some obstacle.
You’ve had a difficult time.
You’ve experienced death.
You’ve lost something.

The inspiration we can all learn from you is inside of you already. Use these tools to inspire us all because we all want it. We all need it.

 

You’ll become positive at the same time.

The best part about publishing positivity is that it makes you more positive at the same time. Each day, I’m searching for something positive to share with you all. This makes me so focused on being positive that I’ve forgotten about the negative world that many experience daily.

You get more of what you focus on.

“Publish positivity and you’ll steer clear of the negative nonsense that’s subconsciously holding you back from being the greatest”

 

Positivity compounds.

Yes, that’s right! As you publish positivity, the effect compounds. You start with being just a little bit positive and once you get a few years in, all the wisdom that people like Nelson Mandela had is at your disposal. Positivity builds the greatness that world champions like Nelson Mandela had.

If you want to do something extraordinary with your life (we all do deep down), then you must start with publishing positivity. Find something to talk about and do it with every ounce of passion in your body. Allow yourself to light up and become a beacon of positivity for anyone that can benefit from your advice.

 

Where does this all lead?

Publishing positivity can lead almost anywhere. I never had any clue when I began. I always thought I’d just do it for a bit and then see what happens. Little did I know that publishing positivity can get you access to people, places, opportunities, careers and feelings I never even knew.

Publishing positivity has made every single goal I’ve ever wanted come to life.
Publishing positivity has allowed me to remove my toxic friends and replace them with my heroes.

The possibilities for you when you publish positivity are the same. You’ll get to experience things that you never thought was possible,

It all starts with publishing positivity and being positive.

Don’t hold yourself back any longer. Get started and publish positivity.

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Motivation

Endorphins Are The Key To The Good Life.

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Endorphins And The Good Life. Basketball Motivation

When I was 25 years old, I became a gym junkie. I went four times a week and trained hard with a personal trainer. During that time of my life, I was chasing the physical appearance benefits of going to the gym and training.

I remember feeling really good after every workout. Whenever I felt stressed or upset, going to the gym helped me.

 

Then my life crashed: I stopped.

About two years in, everything in my life went horribly wrong. I ended up leaving a business and starting all over again. I sold everything I had and so I could no longer justify paying a personal trainer. I stopped going to the gym not long after too.

 

Here’s the harsh truth.

Since that day when I quit the gym all those years ago, I’ve never felt the same. The rush that you get from putting your body under pressure and sweating profusely can’t be matched. A few weeks ago, I began reading this book that included a chapter on physical training.

The benefits were highlighted to me again. You’ll increase your endorphin levels triggering a positive response in your body; you’ll increase cardiac volume; you’ll increase insulin sensitivity and that will put you in a better mental state. Oh, and it makes you smarter too.

Endorphins make you smarter by improving blood flow to the brain and boosting growth hormones that produce new nerve cells. They even help release brain chemicals like dopamine, glutamine and serotonin. Serotonin is the chemical that makes you happy.

So obviously going to the gym and having these endorphin things are good for you. Imagine what newfound energy this will bring to your passions in life.

 

What caused me to go back to the gym?

I’d been feeling low on energy despite my healthy diet and I was getting a few headaches. This was literally killing my dreams because I didn’t have the energy I needed to write inspirational content.

 

I came home from the gym and felt on fire!

After my first session back at the gym, I came home and felt on fire. I wrote five blog posts in a matter of hours – they were some of my best work. My mental state was changed and the low energy I was experiencing went away.

 

The food I ate began to change.

When you increase the endorphin levels in your body, I found, that I no longer wanted to eat junk food. I’ve seen the same change in my friends who have gone this route as well. Training at the gym makes you want to refuel and recharge with proper food.

All of a sudden a big greasy pizza just doesn’t feel appealing anymore. You start to crave fruit, vegetables, tofu, seafood and anything that will nourish you and help you train again the next day.

I know this sounds nuts and I promise you it’s true!

 

It’s not just the endorphins.

The endorphin rush is not the only benefit I got from the gym. There were added side benefits that I didn’t even think of.

It’s the discipline you get.
It’s the goals you set.
It’s the changes you see.
It’s the people you meet at the gym.

 

What starts to happen is that you become focused on being just that little bit better each day. Instead of staying the same and not growing in any way, your mindset changes.

“You look for ways to improve your life and the gym becomes the catalyst for it”

It’s only after some deep, meditative thought that I came to this conclusion. Lucky I read that book hey?

 

And wait, there’s more.

I started to smile more. With my mental state changing for the better, I no longer found myself disappointed or pissed off for not having the energy I craved, to live my life.

With all of this extra thinking space, I found myself smiling more. Looking after yourself feels good. If nothing else, it gives you something to be happy about.

 

Anger and stress decreased.

During the first week of gym training, I had a few negative situations I was dealing with at work.

They were really annoying me and I found myself being angry.

This anger led to stress that I hadn’t experienced for a while.

“The gym became an outlet for me to get out of my own head because I was forced to concentrate on the pain and focus needed to do the exercises I had committed to”

Combining the gym with a bit of meditation also helped too.

 

Don’t forget that three letter word (you thought I was going to say Tim but I mean sex baby!)

So far I’ve only spoken about the gym – don’t forget sex as well. Sex releases endorphins. If you want more endorphins, then have more sex!

Now you have two sources of endorphins to play with (pardon the pun).

 

***Final thought***

I know what you’re thinking – because I am Gandhi (joking) – “Tim I already knew all of this. Of course going to the gym is good for you.”

That’s the issue right there. We know lots of stuff and most of the time we still don’t take action on what is good for us. The best way to take action on tasks like going to the gym is to hear someone else’s story.

Stories will inspire you to take action, not knowledge.

Now you’ve heard my story, it’s time to take action. Drag your ass to the gym and start exercising. Don’t forget to sexercise as well (insert wink emoji here)!

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Motivation

Starting The Morning By Making Your Bed Is Stupid – Do This Instead

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Making Your Bed

Ever heard that you should start your morning by completing one small task like making your bed?

This is stupid advice. Don’t follow it.

If you feel like you have achieved something by making your bed, then you’re way off.

Making your bed is a stupid little task that doesn’t make you feel good at all. If you find satisfaction in doing something so small, and you think that’s a good start, it’s not.

“You must do something meaningful to start the day if you want to change the world”

 

Start the morning with something big.

Yup, that’s what I said you little rascal. Do something that matters. For me, that’s writing blog posts like this one, instead of doing chicken little tasks that don’t serve anybody – like making your bed. I recommend starting the day with an epic achievement.

Sit down and write something you are proud of.
Go and train for that sport you love.
Prepare that presentation that is going to change your company.
Wake up and do public speaking first thing.

Now that last one is one I do every fortnight. I wake up at 4 am and go to Toastmasters at 7 am to start the day with a speech. It sets up my entire week and gives me energy. Try it for yourself.

 

Your mind is fresh in the morning – don’t waste it.

As the day moves on, your energy levels get lower (especially if you have a poor diet). This is why starting your day by wasting your valuable energy making your bed is total nonsense!

Don’t make your bed, use your energy for something that will make you fulfilled.
Start the day with something that will make you damn proud of yourself.

When I publish a freshly written article on Adccited2Success at 5 am, I feel on fire. I get to work ready to steamroll over anyone who wants to take me off my purpose. I feel like a lion ready to pounce on its prey and fight any enemy that presents itself.

 

Your bed can wait.

You know what? Your bed can wait. It doesn’t need to be made right this second. You can do hard labor when you get home and you’re tired from the day. Making your bed requires no thinking so don’t waste your mind on it.

“Low energy states are the best time to make your bed, iron your clothes and cook meals”

 

Achieving goals builds momentum.

The reason why I don’t want you to start your day achieving rubbish goals is that it gives you no momentum. Doing something difficult in the morning sets your day up to tackle even more challenging obstacles.

I’d rather you did the big stuff first and then worried about the small stuff like how your rainbow colored doona on your bed looks. Who you trying to impress with your bed anyway?

 

Some days will suck.

Okay, so I’ve made it sound like every day you are going to live like a commando or even GI Joe. Don’t worry I’m not that silly or crazy. There are days that you will suck. You’ll wake up and achieve nothing. You’ll do dumb stuff like make your bed instead of doing something a bit more difficult.

It’s okay. You can’t be Rambo every single day or hour. What I want you to think about here is to spend the majority of your week in a peak state that involves attempting meaningful goals in the morning. Miss a day here and there. Take the weekend off.

Relax, because you can’t always be on like a pit bull ready to attack.

“If you take yourself too seriously, then you’ll start to lose the plot. Your ego will become out of control and you’ll think you are unstoppable and do something dumb like taking a selfie on the side of a skyscraper where you could fall to your death. Don’t laugh; this is now a thing!”

Everything in moderation. You also need balance. Don’t mistake balance, though, for being lazy and doing half-assed stuff like making your bed.

 

Mornings have defined me.

I get dozens of emails asking how I find time to write and do all the crazy things I talk about.

My response is always the morning. Doing big stuff in the morning has allowed me to get a head start on life. I will not accept mediocrity and even when it hurts, I do my best to remember why I put myself through these challenges, day after day.

There’s something about progress that is addictive and it’s a big part of the success formula. The first thing you do shouldn’t be:

– Make coffee
– Drink lemon water
– Look at your phone
– Check your social media followers.

The first thing you should do is bite a chunk off one of your big audacious goals that forms part of your life’s purpose. Now feel free to substitute the word purpose for vision, goals, meaning of your life – I don’t care amigo.

 

Again, do the big stuff.

Let’s rinse and repeat, so you’re clear. Don’t wake up and do little, tiny, meaningless goals like making your bed and wasting the best hours of the day. Wake up and do something that will give you a sense of fulfillment.

Hope we’re clear now. Time to go do the big stuff. The really big stuff!

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Motivation

Do You Really Want Your Goal?

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I was talking to someone I know about their dating experiences. Dating was something that she always had as a goal, but for a long time, she has been single.

She got frustrated when I shared what has worked for me and my experience. I wanted to understand why she hadn’t got to her goal. “I mean if you want something bad enough then what’s stopping you?” I thought to myself.

 

Dreaming is not enough.

She knew what she wanted and she fantasized about it but she had already made a decision not to take action. Thinking about how nice it would be to sit on the beach with the love of your life will not make you happy.

If you want a business do it.
If you want to find love, then do it.
If you want to travel then do it.
If you want to inspire people, then do it.

What’s the point of having a goal if it never becomes a reality? Making a decision is the first step to any goal and then taking action without knowing the result is the next step. Analytical thinking can often distract you from getting started. Having a crystal clear plan is almost never necessary. I wish I could tell you what the love of your life looks like. I can’t.

 

Exaggerating combined with excuses doesn’t work.

This girl I knew exaggerated every aspect of dating. She would say:

“There are no good guys left.”
“People are so harsh these days.”
“Guys are lazy.”
“Online dating doesn’t work.”

“Excuses are like cancer running through your body. It’s easy to find everything that is wrong with the goal you want to achieve”

Of course, stuff is hard….life is hard. What you’ll learn though is that when you do the hard stuff towards your goal, you get the results and feel awesome about it at the same time.

Tell the world why you are going to achieve your goal – don’t tell us why you won’t. What you tell us about your goal ends up becoming the result.

 

Drunk on comparing.

Next, she told me all about how her friends all got the man they wanted and how it was so easy for them. Nothing is easy for any of us. When we commit to putting in the work, we get closer to our goal. The universe doesn’t owe you jack so forget about serendipity, luck and anything that is not based on you getting off your ass and working.

Getting drunk on comparing only distracts you from your own challenge. Everyone’s life story is different and there are no absolutes. The life you think everyone else has that is so wonderful is all an illusion. You don’t see these people you idolize 24 hours a day.

If you did, what you’d see is all the parts of their life they hate. We are all carrying huge problems on our shoulders. My advice to you would be to not focus on these problems. Focus on what you can do to move forward and spend zero time thinking about everyone else who tells you how happy they are.

 

Lacking energy and motivation.

She tells me she is uninspired and lacking energy. My view is that if you avoid your goal and put it off, you’ll end up feeling this way. To say something is a goal and then say it’s okay if you never achieve it is going to guarantee you failure. That’s exactly what she did.

She told me that she is prepared to face the fact she will never find a man. The moment there is a Plan B, you start telling yourself it’s okay. It’s not okay. If you want this goal, then go after it and never give up. Yes, it will take many tough decision and risks to get to your “Happy Place, ” but it’s worth every bit of pain.

The lack of motivation you face is often tied to your goals.

“When you don’t make progress towards your goal, you start to lose sight of the meaning for your life”

It’s not the end of the world though because you can always change your ways and get back on track.

The energy you need to feel alive again is inside of you. All you need is to feel bad enough about your situation to decide change is a must. When achieving your goal is non-negotiable, and nothing else matters, things start to change in your favor.

 

Feeling lonely.

Of course you will feel lonely if you don’t work towards your goal. Being sad and depressed is not a state of mind that will attract people into your life. No one wants to be around this type of person for a long time.

If you don’t like being lonely, then do something about it! You’re lonely because you’re obsessed with yourself and your selfish desires. Move out of that place and into a place of abundance and caring, and your circumstances will change.

The girl in my story is lonely because she doesn’t have a man. She refuses to do something about it and so she get’s what she settles for. There are billions of people on this planet so it’s nearly impossible to be lonely if you decide you don’t want to be.

When you suffer negative feelings, you can decide to make a stand. You can always decide that enough is enough and you’re going to break the pattern of your own limiting thoughts. It’s your thoughts that are limiting you not the world around you.

 

Assumptions are a curse.

The last thing this girl did was assume until she’d left no space to make anything happen. Assumptions make you think you have all the answers and there’s no more research required. Assumptions tell you that you’re very smart when in fact you’re acting like an idiot.

Not trying something because you think you know the outcome is the ultimate failure. You can’t possibly know how every experiment will turn out beforehand so stop trying to. Don’t sit there and tell me that you’ve tried everything to achieve your goal because you damn well haven’t.

You’ve decided to be a sook and let this negative world win because you’re hoping some third party is going to save the day.

You’re hoping that someone else is going to do the work for you and solve all your problems. You’re hoping that someone will feel sorry for you.

Only you can save yourself. The rest of us are trying to save ourselves from our own problems and challenges. This leaves the entitled person out in the cold searching for answers that don’t exist.

There is hope for you.
There are answers within you if you look for them.
Try Self Improvement. Read a few books.

Stop falling in love with the curse that is “assumptions.”

 

***Final thought***

When I hear stories like the one I’ve just shared, I often wonder whether people really want their goals. I think that goals have become a form of convenience to romanticise about something that will probably never happen.

If you really want your goal then take action. Throw your assumptions and excuses in the bin.

Stop settling for second best. Make a decision today to go after that thing you want so badly. Give yourself time to get the results. Most of all, help others in the process.

That’s how you get your goal ladies and gentleman. Ask yourself again: “Do I really want this goal?”
If so, get to work.

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net

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