Motivation
7 Reasons Why Smart, Hardworking People Don’t Become Successful
For the longest time, I believed that if smart people worked hard and grew up in a reasonably nurturing environment, success would come eventually.
I looked at other people and thought, “Wow, that person’s going to go on to do great things.”
But as I grew older, I realized that’s not necessarily the case. A few people I know who are intelligent and have a strong work ethic have gone on to do notable things, while many others are doing fine. Unfortunately, there are some that drift along, unsure about what to do.
I then realized that there are a lot of factors when it comes to success, whether it means having a fulfilling career, having great relationships, or staying healthy. Yes, smarts are part of it, and so is work ethic. But there’s more at play than just these two factors.
Here are seven reasons why you might not be finding success even if you’re smart and hardworking:
1. You don’t reach out to new people
It’s easy to stick to people you’ve known for a long time. You know each other’s histories and can laugh at inside jokes together. The problem with old friends, though, is that the same ideas are recycled over and over again, and you don’t get to learn new perspectives outside of your bubble.
It can be tough to reach out at first to new people, but starting small can help. Aim for a low goal initially, such as introducing yourself to one person a week.
“You have to fight to reach your dream. You have to sacrifice and work hard for it.” – Lionel Messi
2. You are averse to change
Being in the same environment for a long time makes it hard to adapt to something new. The good news is that change presents a chance for opportunities and innovation.
Instead of resisting changes, see how you can make the best of them. Maybe you can cater to a growing businesses need or see a different perspective. Be open to new concepts and curious about the world around you.
3. You’re not willing to take risks
Smart people often choose the safe route. They might follow the same path as their peers or choose a career because it’s considered acceptable by their peers.
While this guarantees a degree of security, it can be mundane. I hear so often from smart people that they find their jobs unfulfilling and that they want to do something else, but are afraid to do so.
If you’re thinking about branching out into unfamiliar territory, consider what your life will be like decades from now if you opt not to pursue something. Will you regret it, or will you be happy with your decision?
4. You believe you deserve success based on credentials
People that worked hard in school are used to being at the top and told how much potential they show. This seems good initially, but there are some negative side effects.
I’ve heard people claim they deserve something because of their intelligence or where they went to school. They expect things to pan out automatically because of their credentials. Sadly, though, life doesn’t work like that.
In the real world, you don’t get results based on the work you put in. You get results based on the combination of hard work, strategic thinking, and some luck involved. You can increase that last factor by working on the first two.
5. You constantly go after whatever’s exciting at the moment
One thing I hear often from high achievers is that they hate wasting time. Smart people are all too aware of the value of their time, as time and effort spent on one thing means that they could potentially be missing out on something else.
While this is a strong attribute, it also means chasing the next big thing and not following through. Starting out in any field or endeavor is tough, and getting through the initial obstacles requires patience.
Focusing effort on one goal yields much better results in the long run than going after one thing, getting bored, and then going after something new.
6. You can’t commit to a decision
Being smart and working hard can open up numerous doors. Unfortunately, having too many options can be as restricting as having few choices.
An abundance of choices makes it difficult to decide what to do. As a result, it’s tempting to jump around and “see what suits you”. I knew someone who attended numerous graduate school programs, one after another. Over ten years later, she still can’t figure out what to do.
Rather than dabbling in many endeavors, I suggest testing things out first. Talk to other people and do the research before making a big decision, so that you know whether or not an option suits your personality and lifestyle.
7. You don’t believe in yourself
Surprisingly, smart people can underestimate their own abilities. They are their own worst critic, causing them to believe that they can’t accomplish as much as they can.
Smart people have high standards when it comes to their work. Whenever they work on a project, they tend to scrutinize and second-guess the final product.
This seems like a good thing on the surface, but it’s often more debilitating than helpful. Perfectionism can hinder people from progressing forward in their goals or starting on anything in the first place.
“It’s difficult to believe in yourself because the idea of self is an artificial construction. You are, in fact, part of the glorious oneness of the universe. Everything beautiful in the world is within you.” – Russell Brand
So instead of letting fears of “what if” or “I’m not good enough” keep you back from something new, think of how you want your life to look like years from now. Getting started beats waiting for something to happen anytime.
What will you do today to get closer to your success? What are some things that have been holding you back?
Yes, we do feel motivated by reading quotes and watching movies like The Pursuit of Happiness and Soul Surfer. The protagonist makes you feel you are the hero as psychology would call this Experience-taking. However, sometimes these things are not enough to drive you to accomplish your goals and dreams.
Our mind and body wants peace, yet a lack of inspiration shouldn’t slow us down. We wait to be inspired and get no work done because of it.
Is inspiration important to make us successful in our lives? Yes, because it acts as a trigger for the shotgun as it initiates the very vital ‘Beginning Process’ of which we are frightened to jump upon.
What exactly should you do when you lack the inspiration? Read the 5 points below:
1. Meditation Matters
You don’t need to do deep meditation wherein you train your mind to attain the desired state of consciousness. Meditation involves analyzing all kinds of emotions like anger, hatred, compassion, and love. According to many psychological studies, it is revealed meditation drastically minimizes anxiety and stabilizes cognitive ability.
It not only allows you to become inspired but keeps your body physically fit. Today, people are suffering from mental illness like depression. Even when someone is stressed, it is hard to get inspired. If you are a beginner in meditation, you can still experience results. It eradicates all the hindrances that come in the way by calming us down. It is no revelation you perform better when you are relaxed and mindful.
If you are new to meditation check out the iOS app Calm and Android app Headspace. Using proven meditation and mindfulness techniques, these mobile applications train your mind for a healthier, and happier life.
“Quiet the mind, and the soul will speak.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati
2. Pausing Social Media
From your smartphone to your computer, shut everything off and give yourself a needed and short break. Remember, there were no mobile devices 100 years ago so people had to find different ways of entertainment. Perhaps, talk to an old friend or ask the cute girl out in your class.
The psychology today surveyed 100 individuals of which 50 were given all the digital facilities and 50 were provided only the required devices. After the experiment, it was proved that the later group did 85% more effective work than the former. Digital Media is becoming crowded and constrained, so do not forget to stop and pause from time to time.
3. Take a Chill-pill
In our current culture, people seem to be rushing and hustling to get things done, andthey don’t take the time to give their body and brain much-needed rest. According to Phyllis Korkki, a writer for the NY Times, “Employees generally need to detach from their workspace to recharge their internal resources that provide cognitive recharging.”
According to Beth W. Orenstein of Everyday Fitness, “It is easy to get frustrated when we feel uninspired. When these moments come, it is often a good idea to take a break for a few days. Sometimes your mind just needs a break from all the noise and hustle.” We must realize if we don’t rest, our bodies and minds will have no time to recharge, and our inspiration levels will lower down.
“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.” – Jim Goodwin
4. Miracles of Music
This is a head and heart combo, because scientifically, when you listen to your favorite music the soothing effect connects your brain and conscience emphatically. Maybe all you need is a soft jazz (it’s okay if your genre is a heavy metal) to get you out of your creative funk. Music does have a large influence on your emotions. Maybe you’re having a bad day and it is affecting your working ability. Listening to your favorite song might lift your mood and thus allow you to be more productive, innovative and creative in what you will do.
5. Shout out loud
Scientists bring this factor out frequently because people today don’t share their stuff. Their mind becomes a locker room where junk is stored, yet this garbage has to be removed. This negativity can and strain can be abolished when you shout loudly (at a place far which is calm and quiet).
Next time you feel uninspired, try attempting any of the above and you will be surprised how effective it works, because as psychologists say, “Human Beings came with a manual. All you need to know is how to read it.”
What are some ways you find inspiration? Let us know by commenting below!
Image courtesy of Twenty20.com
We all start somewhere. We may not know what our dream is to begin with.
This was certainly the case for me back in 2011. I’d hit rock bottom and everything in my life had gone wrong. There was no meaning in anything I was doing and I didn’t know why I existed. I had no dream and zero goals other than to survive the day.
My anxiety and stress levels were so high at that point in my life that just getting to go to bed at night was good enough.
So how do we begin anything?
I believe the way we begin is often by accident. We don’t always know when an idea is going to hit us or our life is going to change. For me, I certainly had no clue. My life up until that fateful day was spent chasing money and things that I thought mattered.
These were not things that mattered to me; they were things that mattered to society. Getting to where I was on that day was a complete accident. I always thought I was going to be this big time businessman importing stuff from China.
I thought that because I was born in the lucky country of Australia that I was entitled to success. This fateful day would soon teach me how wrong I was.
“Being wrong is often where it starts. Being wrong is where the accident of your success journey can begin”
There is one common trigger
That trigger is a low point where you decide that enough is enough. It often all begins when your pain levels reach and extreme point. It feels like your life is going to implode and that if you died tomorrow, it wouldn’t even matter.
My low point in 2011 became the defining moment where everything changed. I was not purposeful about my new path, but I had definitely had enough. Many of us get this same trigger. What I’ve found is that too many of us don’t use it. These low points are a gift and when you come face to face with one, you need to make the most of it.
These low points are the motivation and change in mindset that you need. I took my sign that my life needed to change and became obsessed.
What does the start of the journey look like?
It doesn’t look all that flash to begin with. The start of a journey towards success never does look amazing.
Mine was so simple it almost seems make-believe. I want to describe it for you in extreme detail so you can see just how simple it was.
On that fateful day where everything collapsed, I made a very small decision. It’s probably the smallest change in my life I have ever made. This decision changed everything.
“All I did was decide to walk around the neighborhood block, where I lived, once per day”
The duration was so short that it was impossible not to do. At this stage in my life, I was not conscious of anything and knew nothing about success or psychology.
I did this walk for a few days and then my mind told me that I wasn’t maximising the time. See, I am one of those crazy people who always has to be hyper productive. In this case, my hyper-productive mind was the greatest gift I had been given.
The next part is still a bit blurry. Having had no clue what to do other than doing my daily walk, I did what all millennials do: I asked Google for answers. I’m not sure what the series of search terms was that led me to Tony Robbins, nor do I care.
Once I found a Tony Robbins video on Youtube, I became hooked. All the answers I was seeking became instantly available to me. At this point, I turned into a total freak.
I got my iPod, downloaded a whole bunch of Tony Robbins audiotapes, and went for a walk every single day. Many of these walks became longer than one hour. I walked as fast as I could and I had a look of determination on my face that made me look like I had been possessed by the devil.
So the turning point was really these walks, combined with listening to audiotapes.
What does all of this mean for you?
That’s a damn good question cowboy. What it means for you is that you may be over thinking your next move. Your next move needs to be a decision. I recommend making lots of small decisions and trying many new things.
The thing that will take you on the next journey that could lead to your life’s purpose and / or dream is probably way simpler than you think. As humans, we over think success and we look for gianormous triggers or external factors before we’re willing to make a decision.
I believe it’s the small decisions that help you begin. It’s the little things you’re dismissing like taking a walk around the neighborhood block that could potentially change your circumstances.
Finding that trigger or habit is not enough
Even if you discover something like walking, which has a major effect on you, it’s not enough. You still need to get off your ass and make a decision. What is that decision you ask?
That decision is to no longer to accept your current results. It’s a decision to cut off from everything else and become intensely focused on one pursuit. If all you do is find a new habit that keeps you in the same rut you’ve been in, you’ll never start your own journey.
I used to be so lazy, indecisive and lack discipline. These were the traits that were holding me back. On many of these walks I went on, I decided that I’d no longer settle for these loser behaviors.
See yourself for what you can become, not who you currently are
“When you begin a new road towards success, you have to think of yourself differently. You absolutely must see yourself as who you can become and not who you currently are”
During my transformation, I focused on all the potential that I had and what I would look like in the future. I thought about standing on stages in front of thousands of people and doing something that filled me with joy and passion. I saw videos of thought leaders like Eric Thomas and told myself that I could live my life at the same level.
To this day, those thoughts have never left me and I never will let them go. Until you’ve been all the way to the lowest of lows, you’ll never know what it’s like to dream big.
You have so much more within you. Yes, people will laugh at you and think you’re dumb. The only reason they think like that is because they are pissed off at their own failures and misfortunes.
Going to Mars
Let me give you an example of people not believing. I’m coaching this young kid right now and he had the idea to take his product to Mars. When he told me that, he thought I’d laugh like everyone else. What he didn’t expect was for me to encourage him.
I told him that if he truly believed that his product could be on Mars, that he should shout it from the rooftop. I told him that he should look people in the eye and tell them he was going to Mars with his product!
If he focuses on who he is right now – a young kid with no money, no work experience and no product – he would never get started.
If he believed all the critics who have never achieved any such goal as going to Mars, he’d never begin.
The way to begin is not just to make a decision, but be bold and believe in yourself. You must believe before anyone will believe in what you’re starting.
If that means you are going to take your product to Mars then so be it.
***Final words***
Don’t let any outside force stop you from beginning any longer. You’ve wasted enough time as it is and life is too short to waste any more time. Go out there and begin. The start is always the hardest part, but it’s also the most rewarding.
Remember what I said before: the beginning will be made up of a few very small decisions and actions. Don’t look for that massive defining moment because chances are it will never come.
Get started right now and believe you were born to do something incredible. We’re all capable of greatness once we find a way to begin. Beginning the journey is where it all starts. No one knows what the end will look like and that’s half the fun.
Time to take the first step.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
Today was one of the best days of my life.
The last month, in fact, has been a dream. I’ve had to pinch myself to make sure I am not fantasizing about what I am experiencing.
The last year has been full of very hard work, lots of tears, a rollercoaster of emotions, forgiveness and gratitude.
I’ve recently got the career opportunities I’ve wanted, I’ve been able to get better at public speaking, my writing has been read more than ever and I have some amazing new friends. I’m not saying this to brag because that is definitely not me; I’m saying it to inspire you to have your own best day.
To have the best day of your life, you must setup your life the way you want it.
Decide on what you want
This fantastic day didn’t happen to me by accident. I earned every minute of it through my efforts. Those emotions I spoke about are what gave me the energy to power towards this phenomenal day.
I decided what I wanted. I painted a rough picture and focused on how I wanted to feel more than anything. Trying to be too exact can often put this goal of an ideal day too far into the future that you never get to touch it with your two beautiful hands.
“You’ll know when you have made the right set of decisions because each day will get closer to being your best day”
You’ll feel a shift in your psychology, your emotions and the presence you give to other people. You’ll start noticing that people compliment you a lot on the positivity you make them feel.
Positivity is infectious and it’s how you get the courage to make the right decisions that will give you the end result which is your best day.
The best day is often the simplest
You don’t need to fly to the moon and back to experience the best day of your life. What’s crazy is that your best day is simplistic. Your best day is unique to you and no two best days are alike.
My best day was dumb as hell. I spent time with a magnificent person, ate healthy food, enjoyed the sunshine and realized that I’ve become a champion in my own eyes (in my humble opinion).
Breaking the groove is the key
Days will flow into years without you realizing unless you stop your mind in its tracks.
Breaking the groove of your boredom and habits that don’t serve you, will allow you to get closer to your best day. During your best day, you’re present and fully aware of everything that’s going on.
Your best day is not about being productive; it’s about living in the moment and being happy and grateful for everything your best day has brought you.
“Until you get out of your messed up routine that has put you into a landslide of nothingness, you’ll continually miss every opportunity to have your best day and then repeat it for the future”
Routine is not all it’s cracked up to be. Routine has got you to where you are. It may be time to break it into little, tiny pieces.
Every day can be extraordinary
I’m not at this level yet but I know people who are. What if the circumstances of your day didn’t get in the way of it being mind-blowing? What if all you had to do was develop enough of a positive mindset to see mostly good things happening?
Being inspired, like how I’ve just described, is possible. Anything is possible when you believe it is. Each day can be your best day once you get on a roll. Before you can do that, you need to know what your best day feels like. Once you get a taste of it, you should have the drug that will get you addicted.
The people who I’ve seen have the best day, every day, have four main traits:
– They practice nonreactivity
– They find happiness in the littlest things
– They write down three things they’re grateful for every 24 hours
– Their default facial expression is a smile
Try and outdo yourself
Okay, so I have had one of my best days. Do I stop here and say “Yay I won?” Hell no brothers and sisters. The goal is to make your life into something that feels like that best day, every day. Writing down your best day is crucial because you’ll be surprised how easily you forget the contents and feelings of that day.
When you reminisce on that day, try only to do one thing: remember how you felt. For me, today, I felt confident, relaxed, inspired, happy and loved all at once. It’s the best feeling in the world and almost impossible to describe fully in words.
The whole challenge of describing my best day is how I know that I’ve hit a peak in my life.
At the top of the mountain, you feel like nothing can take you down. From this position, you feel like you can help so many people to live an inspired life.
Emotion starts to drive you and you concentrate on the way you make people feel rather than trying to be cool or sound smart / funny. The world, after your best day, will never be the same again.
You’ll have a permanent high to reflect on.
You’ll know what it’s like to have truly lived.
What’s important will finally become clear to you.
You’ll have ridiculous clarity on where you are going to spend your time.
It’s your turn
You’ve heard about my best day, now I want you to have yours. I want you to hit a new record in the story of your life. Having the best day of your life is possible for all of us. It’s not a far away land that we can never reach. It’s not a land that can only be reached on a golden chariot.
Today I’ve had my best day. Today I want you to have your best day. Your best day is where you show everybody the best of you. It’s where you show us all what you’ve been up to behind closed doors.
Your best day is where you get to celebrate, knowing that you’ve become someone you can be proud of. It’s your turn to have the best day of your life.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
For this entire year, I have been asked why I have zero goals.
That’s right. You heard right. I write all about personal development and how to be a better version of you and yet I have no goals for this year. You must think I’m a total screw up and a liar / cheat. You must think that I am completely incongruent.
How can you be successful if you have zero goals?
Okay, I left out one important detail. I decided this year to have only one mission and zero goals. Having a single mission means I can be completely focused, rather than get caught up in a blaze of half done goals. See the thing is I would rather achieve one massive, ginormous mission that means the world to me.
I am not interested in doing anything else other than playing life all out and you shouldn’t be either. There’s no point in being mediocre. Mediocre leads to an unfulfilling life and I can’t settle for that. In fact, I can’t settle for second best and you shouldn’t do that either.
Second best leads to regret and that feels like total crap to me. I don’t want to feel like that. The only way I can live the life I want to lead is to be nothing short of inspirational. This means I have to make all of you reading actually take action and execute like you never have before.
“This requires me to go first. This is because leaders go first and they eat their dinner last”
A brief interlude…Tracy Morgan
I’ve just finished listening to a podcast about the famous comedian Tracy Morgan. I’ve never taken him very seriously until the man made me cry like a baby this morning. The man was in a bad car accident and nearly died. He came out the other side having realized what his goal is.
His goal is to love people and show us how to do the same through his comedy. That’s his entire goal. He doesn’t write goal lists or live some crazy morning ritual. His ritual is a single mission and a single goal.
There is something about having a single mission that is so damn motivational in itself. It’s simple and easy to execute on just one thing. We all do such a poor job at trying to juggle multiple balls.
“What if all you needed to do was juggle one ball at a time while taking part in life’s circus”
Through the tears I shed by listening to Tracy be the opposite of funny for a brief moment, I finally understood that our life purpose is our single mission. Our life purpose is that one big mission that we should focus all of our attention on.
As we go through life, our mission can change but our purpose does not. Whatever your mission is and whatever way you find to serve people, you’ll eventually realize that you must love people and show them how to do the same.
Now to be vulnerable
The mission I wanted to achieve this year was to find an amazing woman. I’ve turned down every other offer and every business proposal to do just that. Everyone who knows me knows this mission. It’s written everywhere. It’s spoken about more than one hundred times per day.
If I liked tattoos, I’d probably get it stamped on my arm so I don’t forget it. It’s not easy to admit to the world that I’m trying to find a woman. Generally, people keep this sort of thing behind closed doors and rarely speak about it. It’s a secret mission that shows me that we’re all the same.
So I thought screw it. I’m either going to live what I preach and be honest, otherwise what’s the point?
Why bother writing these words if I’m going to hide behind some corporate mask trying to be someone I’m not. There’s something so freeing about sharing your single mission for the year.
Focus is king
By having one mission for this year, it’s made life crystal clear. When I thought about taking a holiday, I said no. When an opportunity to join a business venture came up, I said no. When I was asked to speak about what I do, I said no.
It’s hard to say no. I’ve found that it’s easier to say no when you have a single mission. You don’t feel regret because you have focused all of your energy on just one thing. I feel that simplicity is so freeing and that’s one of the reasons why I live a minimalistic life.
I want to save my mind for my life’s purpose and not waste thinking capacity on having 101 goals that are not that important to me. This advice might seem counter intuitive to every other self-help blog post, book, video you’ve ever seen. So what? Think about it carefully and it will make sense.
Big goals take enormous energy
Imagine the rejection, negativity, hard work and vulnerability it takes to find a woman for a second. I can tell you that it takes everything you’ve got. If you don’t give it all, then you don’t get the result. This year I knew that I wouldn’t have the energy to achieve my one big mission unless I deleted everything else.
You piss a lot of people off when you do this, but they eventually forgive you. The ones who don’t weren’t your true supporters anyway. The reason I have the energy to deal with so many negative emotions is that I’ve stored up massive reserves, by having no other goals.
The most fatiguing part of having one big mission rather than lots of goals is the decision making that comes with it. Making decisions drains your energy so by not having lots of goals I can concentrate my decision making muscle on only things that are relevant to my mission.
Through the process, I’ve simplified other parts of my life to compound my energy reserves further. I try to have a basic wardrobe, eat similar meals most days, have very few emails, have one place to post my blog articles and so on.
The truth that will set you free
Here it is: you’re distracted, over worked and not focused on what matters to you.
That’s a very harsh thing to say but it’s true. Riding along the highway with just one goal for a year allows you to reset. You may not live this way forever although I think it’s good to try it out on a major goal that seems to escape you continually.
Being true to yourself and forgiving yourself for your past failures will allow you to start fresh. This time, start fresh on a single goal that is a must for you.
When a goal becomes a must, and you’ve diverted all your energy towards it, you’ll see the results you’ve always longed for.
“Take that single mission and slap it over the head until you get the monkey off your back that is distraction and complication”
Narrow down, chunk it down and show us all how to love people. Don’t stop until you get what you want. When you get it, remember to be grateful.
Wish me luck with my mission. Peace. Big, scary world I’m coming for you!
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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Life
Success Has Nothing To Do With Your iPhone Model Number.
Success Has Nothing To Do With Your iPhone Model Number.
Recently, another new iPhone model was announced. Working in tech, people asked me when I’d be buying it. I told them probably not anytime soon, if at all.
“A piece of metal is never going to define my level of success and it shouldn’t define your success either”
Before you buy anything, think about why you’re making the purchase. We often make dumb decisions about buying stuff because we don’t think it through properly.
It’s a piece of metal
Before you have a giant orgasm over the new iPhone, remember that it’s just a chunk of metal. You’ve been using a chunk of metal as a phone for over a decade now. It’s not going to get your rocks off any more than the last phone you bought.
The new iPhone is not going to make love to you although it might remember your name and say it in some sexy, fake voice, so you feel like it’s your friend.
The iPhone is not your friend; it’s your enemy. A chunk of metal doesn’t define your success.
It doesn’t make your life better
If this chunk of metal – called an iPhone – really made our lives better then why are we more depressed than ever? A new phone is going to make you happy for about 3.1 seconds and then like a goldfish, you’ll have forgotten how privileged you are even to own one, as well as afford one, shortly after that.
Only you can make your life better by making better decisions. Choosing not to let material possessions own your life and your time is one way to make your life better. Say no to a new chunk of metal because it’s not making your life better.
Has anything really changed?
Between each of the iPhone models, it’s basically the same phone. Each time they change the screen size to indulge our ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) minds, but that’s about it. Think about it carefully.
That money, compounded, is more valuable
Read any of Warren Buffet’s or Tony Robbins books and you’ll see that the $1000 you shell out for a new iPhone is far better put towards investing. Invest in an index fund, invest in yourself, or use that $1000 to book a holiday so that you have something to look forward to and motivate you for the next six months.
The longer your money stays invested in one of the above, the more it compounds your results. Whether that is financially, personally or from a health point of you. Compounding wins every time.
“You don’t need a new chunk of metal; you need to invest instead”
Never follow the trends – create your own trend
Trends often fade away and a new iPhone is no different. Create your own trend. If everyone else is buying a new iPhone, then do the opposite. Don’t let marketers and technology companies tell you how to live your life. Live your life how you want to.
Are we more productive?
No freaking way. We’re more unproductive than ever and we consider way too many things because our ugly chunk of metal gives us unlimited opportunities to say yes to. Right now, your phone will allow you to book a tantric sex class that begins at 6 am somewhere near you if you really want.
You can literally learn anything at any time if you really want. My question to you is, does it really matter?
Even though you have unlimited options to be productive, you still procrastinate more than ever and so do I. We could be hyper-productive but we’re not and that’s okay. No chunk of metal is going to run your life for you and make you successful.
We don’t need even more distractions
My life already sucks because I get 101 notifications from WeChat, WhatsApp, Messenger and my three email addresses. It’s a full-time job managing all of this and I don’t buy into it. I don’t need to be always contactable – I need a life.
I’m not a robot and I’m not answerable to anyone. Think about this: Are you a free human soul or do you need to be told what to do by your phone?
I’m seeing more human disconnection than ever. At work, it’s easier to call people that are sitting next to me than it is to have a face-to-face conversation. Face-to-face conversations have become a battle between the other person looking down at their phone and occasionally glancing up to look you in the eye.
“All of us are sexier than an ugly piece of metal and we deserved to be looked at!”
Will I also be adding a new Apple Watch to my setup as well?
Not in a million years amigo. A watch is strapped to me and tells me everything via a tiny little screen. Can you imagine being in an intimate moment with your significant other and the watch is flashing and beeping at you? It’s enough to ruin anyone’s romance time.
The Apple Watch reminds me of a bracelet that future prisoners will wear to track their movements. I don’t intend on wearing an Apple Watch so I can be a prisoner in my own life. Life is hard enough already without having to be chained to technology.
Lastly, I’m enjoying aeroplane mode a lot these days
I could buy a new iPhone but I just love aeroplane mode way too much these days. Having the world of social media switched off and not being “ONLINE” all the time has given me space to think. In these brief moments of thinking I’ve been able to:
– Write inspiring blog posts that have gone viral
– Fall in love again
– Work on my health
– Read books and gain new skills
– Socialise with friends
– Mentor young entrepreneurs in a startup accelerator
Through these list of activities, I’ve been able to create more success than I could ever have imagined on my useless chunk of metal called an iPhone.
So honestly guys and girls, when people ask me if I’m buying a new iPhone, all I can say is “No I’m not buying a new iPhone because my life is more important. The human race and changing the world is more important.”
I need time to change the world and space to think; the new iPhone can’t do this for me and it never will.
No chunk of metal should ever define you and your success.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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Great article! Thanks.
I find that very hard working / smart people never seem to get enough so success perhaps in their mind is never achieved. I also believe that their social skills (arrogance/lack of humility) can be a major factor blocking their way to success. -
Thank you so much that was a beautiful writing and so true. I have suffered all my life with not being focused on just one thing maybe the fear of succeeding has been stronger than I thought
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What a brilliant explanation!! Although I am doing some of them, but will make immediate amends to my life to meet the rest. Many thanks once again
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Great article.
I have got to believe self-doubt to be one of the biggest sabotaging things for success. Most people are much more capable than they give themselves credit for.
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I know plenty of people Melissa who are very smart but if there psychology is not equally as smart, they end up struggling to find jobs. Thanks for your article!
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Thanks Tim, yes often it’s not about just hard work or doing well academically. Many other factors are important to consider such as understanding people, finding a strategy that works, etc.
Melissa
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Well that’s pretty much the same case with me, i am running a successful blog but still i lack interaction with people around me that’s why i am exploring more ways to be successful.
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Thanks Rishabh, connecting with others and learning how you can help them is key to helping yourself.
Melissa
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Yes, we do feel motivated by reading quotes and watching movies like The Pursuit of Happiness and Soul Surfer. The protagonist makes you feel you are the hero as psychology would call this Experience-taking. However, sometimes these things are not enough to drive you to accomplish your goals and dreams.
Our mind and body wants peace, yet a lack of inspiration shouldn’t slow us down. We wait to be inspired and get no work done because of it.
Is inspiration important to make us successful in our lives? Yes, because it acts as a trigger for the shotgun as it initiates the very vital ‘Beginning Process’ of which we are frightened to jump upon.
What exactly should you do when you lack the inspiration? Read the 5 points below:
1. Meditation Matters
You don’t need to do deep meditation wherein you train your mind to attain the desired state of consciousness. Meditation involves analyzing all kinds of emotions like anger, hatred, compassion, and love. According to many psychological studies, it is revealed meditation drastically minimizes anxiety and stabilizes cognitive ability.
It not only allows you to become inspired but keeps your body physically fit. Today, people are suffering from mental illness like depression. Even when someone is stressed, it is hard to get inspired. If you are a beginner in meditation, you can still experience results. It eradicates all the hindrances that come in the way by calming us down. It is no revelation you perform better when you are relaxed and mindful.
If you are new to meditation check out the iOS app Calm and Android app Headspace. Using proven meditation and mindfulness techniques, these mobile applications train your mind for a healthier, and happier life.
“Quiet the mind, and the soul will speak.” – Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati
2. Pausing Social Media
From your smartphone to your computer, shut everything off and give yourself a needed and short break. Remember, there were no mobile devices 100 years ago so people had to find different ways of entertainment. Perhaps, talk to an old friend or ask the cute girl out in your class.
The psychology today surveyed 100 individuals of which 50 were given all the digital facilities and 50 were provided only the required devices. After the experiment, it was proved that the later group did 85% more effective work than the former. Digital Media is becoming crowded and constrained, so do not forget to stop and pause from time to time.
3. Take a Chill-pill
In our current culture, people seem to be rushing and hustling to get things done, andthey don’t take the time to give their body and brain much-needed rest. According to Phyllis Korkki, a writer for the NY Times, “Employees generally need to detach from their workspace to recharge their internal resources that provide cognitive recharging.”
According to Beth W. Orenstein of Everyday Fitness, “It is easy to get frustrated when we feel uninspired. When these moments come, it is often a good idea to take a break for a few days. Sometimes your mind just needs a break from all the noise and hustle.” We must realize if we don’t rest, our bodies and minds will have no time to recharge, and our inspiration levels will lower down.
“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.” – Jim Goodwin
4. Miracles of Music
This is a head and heart combo, because scientifically, when you listen to your favorite music the soothing effect connects your brain and conscience emphatically. Maybe all you need is a soft jazz (it’s okay if your genre is a heavy metal) to get you out of your creative funk. Music does have a large influence on your emotions. Maybe you’re having a bad day and it is affecting your working ability. Listening to your favorite song might lift your mood and thus allow you to be more productive, innovative and creative in what you will do.
5. Shout out loud
Scientists bring this factor out frequently because people today don’t share their stuff. Their mind becomes a locker room where junk is stored, yet this garbage has to be removed. This negativity can and strain can be abolished when you shout loudly (at a place far which is calm and quiet).
Next time you feel uninspired, try attempting any of the above and you will be surprised how effective it works, because as psychologists say, “Human Beings came with a manual. All you need to know is how to read it.”
What are some ways you find inspiration? Let us know by commenting below!
Image courtesy of Twenty20.com
We all start somewhere. We may not know what our dream is to begin with.
This was certainly the case for me back in 2011. I’d hit rock bottom and everything in my life had gone wrong. There was no meaning in anything I was doing and I didn’t know why I existed. I had no dream and zero goals other than to survive the day.
My anxiety and stress levels were so high at that point in my life that just getting to go to bed at night was good enough.
So how do we begin anything?
I believe the way we begin is often by accident. We don’t always know when an idea is going to hit us or our life is going to change. For me, I certainly had no clue. My life up until that fateful day was spent chasing money and things that I thought mattered.
These were not things that mattered to me; they were things that mattered to society. Getting to where I was on that day was a complete accident. I always thought I was going to be this big time businessman importing stuff from China.
I thought that because I was born in the lucky country of Australia that I was entitled to success. This fateful day would soon teach me how wrong I was.
“Being wrong is often where it starts. Being wrong is where the accident of your success journey can begin”
There is one common trigger
That trigger is a low point where you decide that enough is enough. It often all begins when your pain levels reach and extreme point. It feels like your life is going to implode and that if you died tomorrow, it wouldn’t even matter.
My low point in 2011 became the defining moment where everything changed. I was not purposeful about my new path, but I had definitely had enough. Many of us get this same trigger. What I’ve found is that too many of us don’t use it. These low points are a gift and when you come face to face with one, you need to make the most of it.
These low points are the motivation and change in mindset that you need. I took my sign that my life needed to change and became obsessed.
What does the start of the journey look like?
It doesn’t look all that flash to begin with. The start of a journey towards success never does look amazing.
Mine was so simple it almost seems make-believe. I want to describe it for you in extreme detail so you can see just how simple it was.
On that fateful day where everything collapsed, I made a very small decision. It’s probably the smallest change in my life I have ever made. This decision changed everything.
“All I did was decide to walk around the neighborhood block, where I lived, once per day”
The duration was so short that it was impossible not to do. At this stage in my life, I was not conscious of anything and knew nothing about success or psychology.
I did this walk for a few days and then my mind told me that I wasn’t maximising the time. See, I am one of those crazy people who always has to be hyper productive. In this case, my hyper-productive mind was the greatest gift I had been given.
The next part is still a bit blurry. Having had no clue what to do other than doing my daily walk, I did what all millennials do: I asked Google for answers. I’m not sure what the series of search terms was that led me to Tony Robbins, nor do I care.
Once I found a Tony Robbins video on Youtube, I became hooked. All the answers I was seeking became instantly available to me. At this point, I turned into a total freak.
I got my iPod, downloaded a whole bunch of Tony Robbins audiotapes, and went for a walk every single day. Many of these walks became longer than one hour. I walked as fast as I could and I had a look of determination on my face that made me look like I had been possessed by the devil.
So the turning point was really these walks, combined with listening to audiotapes.
What does all of this mean for you?
That’s a damn good question cowboy. What it means for you is that you may be over thinking your next move. Your next move needs to be a decision. I recommend making lots of small decisions and trying many new things.
The thing that will take you on the next journey that could lead to your life’s purpose and / or dream is probably way simpler than you think. As humans, we over think success and we look for gianormous triggers or external factors before we’re willing to make a decision.
I believe it’s the small decisions that help you begin. It’s the little things you’re dismissing like taking a walk around the neighborhood block that could potentially change your circumstances.
Finding that trigger or habit is not enough
Even if you discover something like walking, which has a major effect on you, it’s not enough. You still need to get off your ass and make a decision. What is that decision you ask?
That decision is to no longer to accept your current results. It’s a decision to cut off from everything else and become intensely focused on one pursuit. If all you do is find a new habit that keeps you in the same rut you’ve been in, you’ll never start your own journey.
I used to be so lazy, indecisive and lack discipline. These were the traits that were holding me back. On many of these walks I went on, I decided that I’d no longer settle for these loser behaviors.
See yourself for what you can become, not who you currently are
“When you begin a new road towards success, you have to think of yourself differently. You absolutely must see yourself as who you can become and not who you currently are”
During my transformation, I focused on all the potential that I had and what I would look like in the future. I thought about standing on stages in front of thousands of people and doing something that filled me with joy and passion. I saw videos of thought leaders like Eric Thomas and told myself that I could live my life at the same level.
To this day, those thoughts have never left me and I never will let them go. Until you’ve been all the way to the lowest of lows, you’ll never know what it’s like to dream big.
You have so much more within you. Yes, people will laugh at you and think you’re dumb. The only reason they think like that is because they are pissed off at their own failures and misfortunes.
Going to Mars
Let me give you an example of people not believing. I’m coaching this young kid right now and he had the idea to take his product to Mars. When he told me that, he thought I’d laugh like everyone else. What he didn’t expect was for me to encourage him.
I told him that if he truly believed that his product could be on Mars, that he should shout it from the rooftop. I told him that he should look people in the eye and tell them he was going to Mars with his product!
If he focuses on who he is right now – a young kid with no money, no work experience and no product – he would never get started.
If he believed all the critics who have never achieved any such goal as going to Mars, he’d never begin.
The way to begin is not just to make a decision, but be bold and believe in yourself. You must believe before anyone will believe in what you’re starting.
If that means you are going to take your product to Mars then so be it.
***Final words***
Don’t let any outside force stop you from beginning any longer. You’ve wasted enough time as it is and life is too short to waste any more time. Go out there and begin. The start is always the hardest part, but it’s also the most rewarding.
Remember what I said before: the beginning will be made up of a few very small decisions and actions. Don’t look for that massive defining moment because chances are it will never come.
Get started right now and believe you were born to do something incredible. We’re all capable of greatness once we find a way to begin. Beginning the journey is where it all starts. No one knows what the end will look like and that’s half the fun.
Time to take the first step.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
Today was one of the best days of my life.
The last month, in fact, has been a dream. I’ve had to pinch myself to make sure I am not fantasizing about what I am experiencing.
The last year has been full of very hard work, lots of tears, a rollercoaster of emotions, forgiveness and gratitude.
I’ve recently got the career opportunities I’ve wanted, I’ve been able to get better at public speaking, my writing has been read more than ever and I have some amazing new friends. I’m not saying this to brag because that is definitely not me; I’m saying it to inspire you to have your own best day.
To have the best day of your life, you must setup your life the way you want it.
Decide on what you want
This fantastic day didn’t happen to me by accident. I earned every minute of it through my efforts. Those emotions I spoke about are what gave me the energy to power towards this phenomenal day.
I decided what I wanted. I painted a rough picture and focused on how I wanted to feel more than anything. Trying to be too exact can often put this goal of an ideal day too far into the future that you never get to touch it with your two beautiful hands.
“You’ll know when you have made the right set of decisions because each day will get closer to being your best day”
You’ll feel a shift in your psychology, your emotions and the presence you give to other people. You’ll start noticing that people compliment you a lot on the positivity you make them feel.
Positivity is infectious and it’s how you get the courage to make the right decisions that will give you the end result which is your best day.
The best day is often the simplest
You don’t need to fly to the moon and back to experience the best day of your life. What’s crazy is that your best day is simplistic. Your best day is unique to you and no two best days are alike.
My best day was dumb as hell. I spent time with a magnificent person, ate healthy food, enjoyed the sunshine and realized that I’ve become a champion in my own eyes (in my humble opinion).
Breaking the groove is the key
Days will flow into years without you realizing unless you stop your mind in its tracks.
Breaking the groove of your boredom and habits that don’t serve you, will allow you to get closer to your best day. During your best day, you’re present and fully aware of everything that’s going on.
Your best day is not about being productive; it’s about living in the moment and being happy and grateful for everything your best day has brought you.
“Until you get out of your messed up routine that has put you into a landslide of nothingness, you’ll continually miss every opportunity to have your best day and then repeat it for the future”
Routine is not all it’s cracked up to be. Routine has got you to where you are. It may be time to break it into little, tiny pieces.
Every day can be extraordinary
I’m not at this level yet but I know people who are. What if the circumstances of your day didn’t get in the way of it being mind-blowing? What if all you had to do was develop enough of a positive mindset to see mostly good things happening?
Being inspired, like how I’ve just described, is possible. Anything is possible when you believe it is. Each day can be your best day once you get on a roll. Before you can do that, you need to know what your best day feels like. Once you get a taste of it, you should have the drug that will get you addicted.
The people who I’ve seen have the best day, every day, have four main traits:
– They practice nonreactivity
– They find happiness in the littlest things
– They write down three things they’re grateful for every 24 hours
– Their default facial expression is a smile
Try and outdo yourself
Okay, so I have had one of my best days. Do I stop here and say “Yay I won?” Hell no brothers and sisters. The goal is to make your life into something that feels like that best day, every day. Writing down your best day is crucial because you’ll be surprised how easily you forget the contents and feelings of that day.
When you reminisce on that day, try only to do one thing: remember how you felt. For me, today, I felt confident, relaxed, inspired, happy and loved all at once. It’s the best feeling in the world and almost impossible to describe fully in words.
The whole challenge of describing my best day is how I know that I’ve hit a peak in my life.
At the top of the mountain, you feel like nothing can take you down. From this position, you feel like you can help so many people to live an inspired life.
Emotion starts to drive you and you concentrate on the way you make people feel rather than trying to be cool or sound smart / funny. The world, after your best day, will never be the same again.
You’ll have a permanent high to reflect on.
You’ll know what it’s like to have truly lived.
What’s important will finally become clear to you.
You’ll have ridiculous clarity on where you are going to spend your time.
It’s your turn
You’ve heard about my best day, now I want you to have yours. I want you to hit a new record in the story of your life. Having the best day of your life is possible for all of us. It’s not a far away land that we can never reach. It’s not a land that can only be reached on a golden chariot.
Today I’ve had my best day. Today I want you to have your best day. Your best day is where you show everybody the best of you. It’s where you show us all what you’ve been up to behind closed doors.
Your best day is where you get to celebrate, knowing that you’ve become someone you can be proud of. It’s your turn to have the best day of your life.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
For this entire year, I have been asked why I have zero goals.
That’s right. You heard right. I write all about personal development and how to be a better version of you and yet I have no goals for this year. You must think I’m a total screw up and a liar / cheat. You must think that I am completely incongruent.
How can you be successful if you have zero goals?
Okay, I left out one important detail. I decided this year to have only one mission and zero goals. Having a single mission means I can be completely focused, rather than get caught up in a blaze of half done goals. See the thing is I would rather achieve one massive, ginormous mission that means the world to me.
I am not interested in doing anything else other than playing life all out and you shouldn’t be either. There’s no point in being mediocre. Mediocre leads to an unfulfilling life and I can’t settle for that. In fact, I can’t settle for second best and you shouldn’t do that either.
Second best leads to regret and that feels like total crap to me. I don’t want to feel like that. The only way I can live the life I want to lead is to be nothing short of inspirational. This means I have to make all of you reading actually take action and execute like you never have before.
“This requires me to go first. This is because leaders go first and they eat their dinner last”
A brief interlude…Tracy Morgan
I’ve just finished listening to a podcast about the famous comedian Tracy Morgan. I’ve never taken him very seriously until the man made me cry like a baby this morning. The man was in a bad car accident and nearly died. He came out the other side having realized what his goal is.
His goal is to love people and show us how to do the same through his comedy. That’s his entire goal. He doesn’t write goal lists or live some crazy morning ritual. His ritual is a single mission and a single goal.
There is something about having a single mission that is so damn motivational in itself. It’s simple and easy to execute on just one thing. We all do such a poor job at trying to juggle multiple balls.
“What if all you needed to do was juggle one ball at a time while taking part in life’s circus”
Through the tears I shed by listening to Tracy be the opposite of funny for a brief moment, I finally understood that our life purpose is our single mission. Our life purpose is that one big mission that we should focus all of our attention on.
As we go through life, our mission can change but our purpose does not. Whatever your mission is and whatever way you find to serve people, you’ll eventually realize that you must love people and show them how to do the same.
Now to be vulnerable
The mission I wanted to achieve this year was to find an amazing woman. I’ve turned down every other offer and every business proposal to do just that. Everyone who knows me knows this mission. It’s written everywhere. It’s spoken about more than one hundred times per day.
If I liked tattoos, I’d probably get it stamped on my arm so I don’t forget it. It’s not easy to admit to the world that I’m trying to find a woman. Generally, people keep this sort of thing behind closed doors and rarely speak about it. It’s a secret mission that shows me that we’re all the same.
So I thought screw it. I’m either going to live what I preach and be honest, otherwise what’s the point?
Why bother writing these words if I’m going to hide behind some corporate mask trying to be someone I’m not. There’s something so freeing about sharing your single mission for the year.
Focus is king
By having one mission for this year, it’s made life crystal clear. When I thought about taking a holiday, I said no. When an opportunity to join a business venture came up, I said no. When I was asked to speak about what I do, I said no.
It’s hard to say no. I’ve found that it’s easier to say no when you have a single mission. You don’t feel regret because you have focused all of your energy on just one thing. I feel that simplicity is so freeing and that’s one of the reasons why I live a minimalistic life.
I want to save my mind for my life’s purpose and not waste thinking capacity on having 101 goals that are not that important to me. This advice might seem counter intuitive to every other self-help blog post, book, video you’ve ever seen. So what? Think about it carefully and it will make sense.
Big goals take enormous energy
Imagine the rejection, negativity, hard work and vulnerability it takes to find a woman for a second. I can tell you that it takes everything you’ve got. If you don’t give it all, then you don’t get the result. This year I knew that I wouldn’t have the energy to achieve my one big mission unless I deleted everything else.
You piss a lot of people off when you do this, but they eventually forgive you. The ones who don’t weren’t your true supporters anyway. The reason I have the energy to deal with so many negative emotions is that I’ve stored up massive reserves, by having no other goals.
The most fatiguing part of having one big mission rather than lots of goals is the decision making that comes with it. Making decisions drains your energy so by not having lots of goals I can concentrate my decision making muscle on only things that are relevant to my mission.
Through the process, I’ve simplified other parts of my life to compound my energy reserves further. I try to have a basic wardrobe, eat similar meals most days, have very few emails, have one place to post my blog articles and so on.
The truth that will set you free
Here it is: you’re distracted, over worked and not focused on what matters to you.
That’s a very harsh thing to say but it’s true. Riding along the highway with just one goal for a year allows you to reset. You may not live this way forever although I think it’s good to try it out on a major goal that seems to escape you continually.
Being true to yourself and forgiving yourself for your past failures will allow you to start fresh. This time, start fresh on a single goal that is a must for you.
When a goal becomes a must, and you’ve diverted all your energy towards it, you’ll see the results you’ve always longed for.
“Take that single mission and slap it over the head until you get the monkey off your back that is distraction and complication”
Narrow down, chunk it down and show us all how to love people. Don’t stop until you get what you want. When you get it, remember to be grateful.
Wish me luck with my mission. Peace. Big, scary world I’m coming for you!
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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Jan Odegaard
Jul 18, 2017 at 3:51 am
Great article! Thanks.
I find that very hard working / smart people never seem to get enough so success perhaps in their mind is never achieved. I also believe that their social skills (arrogance/lack of humility) can be a major factor blocking their way to success.
Yvonne Pacella
Sep 19, 2016 at 12:01 pm
Thank you so much that was a beautiful writing and so true. I have suffered all my life with not being focused on just one thing maybe the fear of succeeding has been stronger than I thought
Sourish
Sep 16, 2016 at 4:43 pm
What a brilliant explanation!! Although I am doing some of them, but will make immediate amends to my life to meet the rest. Many thanks once again
Julie
May 24, 2016 at 3:03 am
This is totally me!
Rob Malone
May 18, 2016 at 1:48 pm
Great article.
I have got to believe self-doubt to be one of the biggest sabotaging things for success. Most people are much more capable than they give themselves credit for.
Allison Hayes
May 6, 2016 at 4:02 am
Awesome piece! So incredibly helpful!!
Tim Denning
May 3, 2016 at 5:05 am
I know plenty of people Melissa who are very smart but if there psychology is not equally as smart, they end up struggling to find jobs. Thanks for your article!
Melissa Chu
May 3, 2016 at 5:15 pm
Thanks Tim, yes often it’s not about just hard work or doing well academically. Many other factors are important to consider such as understanding people, finding a strategy that works, etc.
Melissa
Rishabh Jain
Apr 30, 2016 at 7:18 pm
Well that’s pretty much the same case with me, i am running a successful blog but still i lack interaction with people around me that’s why i am exploring more ways to be successful.
Melissa Chu
May 3, 2016 at 5:13 pm
Thanks Rishabh, connecting with others and learning how you can help them is key to helping yourself.
Melissa