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Why The Younger Generation Doesn’t Want To Own Stuff

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Baby boomers keep telling me I should own stuff. I’m not sold. In fact, I’ve done the exact opposite. That nice BMW, sold; all of the stuff I never use like vinyl records and old posters, sold. Then there’s the technology. We’re all addicted to having the newest whatever and half the time it’s no different from the previous model.

I’ve been a possession junkie for most of my life. When you’re making good money, it’s easy to buy things and not even notice. Ultimately, when I analyse it carefully, the times I brought things were typically to fill a void in my life.

You can’t buy your way to happiness and owning stuff is not the answer to success even though TV, movies, and the Internet try and make us believe this myth.

Here are 8 reasons why young people like me no longer want to own stuff:

1. Progress only matters in life, not stuff

We’re sold this dream that the more we keep updating and improving with material possessions the happier we’ll be. This is only partly true. In reality, the more we progress as a person and continue to experience growth, the happier we’ll be.

Growth is a fundamental human need, and it’s what all happy and sane humans need. Young people have figured out that when you buy something new, the good feeling only lasts a few days or maybe weeks if you’re lucky. Then, like magic, it’s gone.

2. Starting a business makes more sense

We’re in the age where anyone can start a business for next to nothing. Rather than spend all your money on possessions, it’s now far more popular to invest in a startup. Young people have figured out that you can’t work full-time for someone forever.

“At some point, you have to cut the umbilical cord of your false sense of safety, and start your own thing”

This may be part time forever, and that’s cool. Young people know that you need multiple revenue streams just like a business does.

By saving up your money to invest in a business, you get to hopefully do something you love, and make some money on your own terms. Yes, you may fail miserably, but eventually, you will start the right business.

3. Stuff depreciates

Young people have figured out that the value of stuff goes down quickly. The moment you buy a car and drive away from the showroom, you’ve just lost money. We’re in a new world now where the sharing economy has taken over.

It’s often cheaper to share an asset with other people because you are never going to use anything 24/7.

4. We have less room

Finding places to store stuff is becoming increasingly difficult because we’re often living in smaller places than our parents. Piling up garages full of useless junk that we never use is no longer cool anymore. Owning less has become the smarter way to live.

5. It’s impossible to own

While we’re on this whole topic of ownership, I hate to break it to you, but there’s no such thing. You’ll never own anything for eternity unless you have drunk the magic water and are going to live forever.

We all have an expiry date and so those things you think your own, are only on loan to you while your two feet are on the ground. After that, they become someone else’s. That’s what we young people have figured out, and that’s why ownership is no longer popular.

6. Owning makes us feel worse

Clutter makes our mind feel uneasy. That’s why when I write blog posts I clear all the junk out of my office and make everything feel nice and clean.

Owning also gives us unneeded stress. Do any of us need more stress? No, thank you. Statistically we’re more stressed than ever, and a lot of that has to do with the stuff we own. Free your mind from all the negative feelings and sell some stuff.

Go on eBay and unload as much as you can. The beauty is that you’ll have a pocket full of money for your next holiday before you know it.

Possessions also create worry because we’re afraid something could happen to them. They could get stolen or damaged. They may wear out sooner than we expected. Oh no, what do we do with all of these what if’s? Buy insurance? No, sell my friend.

Have you ever seen one of those picker shows? It’s where they go to some old person’s home and look at all of their antiques and tell them how lucky they are. Usually, the owners of all the junk are fat, old, depressed, and lonely.

The junk has become a burden, and that’s why the picker is there in the first place. These people with all these barns of stuff look like some of the unhappiest people on the planet…there’s a reason for that!

7. The concept of success has changed

Success used to be based on your postcode and how many cars you had. Young people reinvented the idea of success when they discovered college debt. College debt makes us young people have to work ten times harder, often for something that doesn’t bring us a lot of success.

That’s why, now, debt is frowned upon by young people. The reason we don’t want to own stuff anymore is that it requires debt to purchase all of these possessions. Personal debt (business debt is different) equals more pain and less freedom. Doesn’t sound like much fun to me.

8. Experiences are everything

The most popular reason why young people don’t want to own stuff is because we value experiences. Rather than owning stuff, we want to experience life. It’s very hard to travel when you’re trying to pay for your AirBNB accommodation and your permanent residence.

When you don’t own you can do whatever the hell you want and go wherever you want to go. Instead of living in one city you can live in every city. If you’re best mate on the other side of the world calls you up to come over and watch the latest James Bond movie you can.

All you have to do is jump on a plane, and you’re there. No more being bored because your surroundings can be different as often as you want. You’re not tied to useless possessions and out of date models of the world.

The upside of experiences is that they involve other people. We get to have an experience and share it with the people close to us. Hearing about other people’s possession is freaking annoying, and no one likes it. Hearing about experiences though is captivating, and we all love it.

How do you feel about owning stuff? Let me know on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook.

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. Toño

    Oct 20, 2016 at 7:50 am

    Hey Tim, I totally loved your very last paragraph and every single bit of it! I like the idea instead of living in one city you can live in every city and that when your best friend/family member calling you out to walk the dog in nature on the other side of the world, you actually can do it! This is just awesome, my friend 🙂

    Fun thing is, I recently started to get over my junk and stopped wasting money on stuff I don’t need. I remember one of your articles on being free from owning lots of stuff and where you told me to stop buy clothes every single time I see them, and so I did! Now I’m on a new level and saving money to invest in myself and my own thing. What will it be? I don’t even know, I have some ideas. I want to travel as you remember so now my savings will go on a ticket and some basics need so I cold just quit the job of mine, go visit my family and do film some nature I so much adore.

    Getting rid of unneeded stuuf has never been so much fun and quite frankly I enjoy it on daily basis. My apartment half empty now and it feels so free and cool, and you’re so right about cleaning your place before any activity – your mind feel at ease and you can focus more on things that matter 🙂

    We have less room, that’s a great point. We surely do and I love how you said ‘piling up garages full of useless junk that we never use is no longer cool anymore’ haha 😀 We gathered so much garbage on this planet it’s dead obvious we have to clean and clean a lot. Nature’s been giving us signals here, there and we should rather listen to it than ignore. We just cannot own thing because next day is guaranteed. The only thing we possess it’s our body and that’s where we should invest our time and money. And even this body doesn’t last forever. Health is our greatest wealth and we should take care of it first!

    Starting a business another excellent idea many should embrace and at least give it a try. I really love how you compelled everything important here on the subject, Tim and made it’s easy to understand and read. Even your full article is in harmony with it’s content – no junk inside, only the raw basics you need 😀

    Top stuff, my man, I really appreciate it! Thank you very much, Tim, see you soon and have a fantastic day, my friend!

    • Tim Denning

      Oct 26, 2016 at 12:44 am

      Toño I am glad to see you are embracing the minimalist way and getting all of the benefits. It’s done the same for me as well.

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Life

8 Things You Can Do to Rise Above Failure and Attain Success

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Highly successful people have tasted failure more than success. Whether its Nikola Tesla or Michael Jordan, everyone had his/her fair share of failures before rising to the pinnacle of success. Yet, most people I know are averse to the idea of failure.

When ambition fuels your desires, you become so conscious about avoiding failure that you forget to learn how to cope with it when you actually experience it. So, when you come face-to-face with adversity, it often overwhelms you.

This brings us to the question, how can you train yourself to overcome these difficulties and use them to your advantage? Here’s how:

1. Acceptance is important to overcome failure

When the going gets tough, one of the most frustrating things you may get to hear is “stay positive.” The idea of positive thinking has been misconstrued, misused, and abused continuously. Contrary to popular belief, positive thinking has nothing to do with smiling and being happy with everything that happens to you all the time. Anyone who preaches that is either lying or crazy.

Use positive thinking to learn, grow, and evolve from the experiences we gather in life. Positive thinking simply means that if you are faced with a setback, you work hard to overcome the challenges. When you experience hardships, it is alright to feel upset and disappointed. Our objective, however, is not to stay down.

2. Be honest with yourself

The most crucial part of dealing with a failure involves pausing for a couple of minutes and pondering over what happened. You need to be completely honest with yourself on why it happened.

It is easy to pull out the Smartphone, turn on the laptop or find other forms of distraction. Most people would do anything to distract themselves and keep their eyes shut to the mistakes they have made.

However, if you don’t confront, you don’t learn. And if you don’t learn, then you are setting yourself up for failure again. Albert Einstein famously stated that it was insane to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different outcome. If you don’t derive a lesson out of mistakes and failures in life, then you are doomed to keep repeating them, whether you realise it or not.

“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” – Henry Ford

3. Don’t beat yourself up over a temporary setback

When you have experienced a setback, many of you may succumb to the feeling that you’ll always keep failing. It is easy to convince yourself that you are indeed a failure. Don’t let such destructive ideas or thoughts creep into your head. Instead, keep reminding yourself that just because you failed today, it doesn’t mean you’d fail the next time as well.

It is also important that you treat your failure as a passing phase. When you keep moving forward, focus on the right things, and keep learning. Perceiving the setback as a temporary phase rather than something permanent is vital to developing an optimistic attitude in life.

4. Focus on nurturing and improving yourself

Failures don’t discriminate, and it comes to everyone at some point. The trick lies in learning to deal with it and what you do about it that makes all the difference. In many cases, failure happens because a person wasn’t prepared, didn’t invest time on planning or was ill-equipped. It can also be because Lady Luck decided not to shower her favours.

Except for the last one, the rest of the issues can be fixed. Prepare a list of all the things that you think resulted in your failure. Start working on them one at a time. Do everything in your capacity to rectify, improve, resolve, and develop.

5. Find inspiration and support in abundance

Interacting with someone close can be more helpful than you think. You can also learn from people who have been through similar situations and have achieved what you hope to. Gain insights on how they managed to sail through the setbacks or low-points before and during the moment of success.

Or you can gain the motivation or enthusiasm by listening to someone else from an audiobook or podcast for maybe 30-60 minutes. It doesn’t have to be focused on your current setbacks.  Change your mood and mindset back towards optimism again.

6. Adopt a constructive approach and learn from the adverse situation

Consider it as valuable feedback and take home something you can implement in the process of overcoming your failure. The following are some of the questions you need to ask yourself:

  • What is the lesson for me?
  • How can I rectify myself to avoid making the same mistake and do better next time?
  • What can I do to enjoy guaranteed success?

You don’t need to rush through the process. Some of the answers may be immediate, while others might take an hour, a day or even a week to pop up. The significant thing is to start thinking about the situation from this perspective. Also, you need to be constructive about things rather than getting stuck with denial, negativity and apathy.

7. Stop mulling over and move on

Processing the situation and accepting it is the ideal way to deal with failures. Any individual who has experienced failures will know that it is quite easy to stay stuck in the loop of similar thoughts. In fact, this may go around and around for weeks or even months.

Now, in order to be free from this trap, the one habit that might help you is the set of questions like the ones shared above. You can also create a rough plan for how you wish to move forward from here. So, take some time to sit down and write them down.

“Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

8. Purge out all the negativity

Another impactful way to handle the emotional meltdown and the thoughts that emerge from experiencing failure is to purge out all the negativity. In order to let everything out, you need to confide in someone close to you. There are two ways to go about it: Engaging in a conversation with someone will allow you to see it from a different perspective. The person you talk to can assist you in grounding yourself in reality again and motivate you to look for a way forward.

Or you can simply vent about it while the other person who is listening can sort things out for you. He/she can help you accept what happened and boost your spirit by instilling a sense of hope.

The significant thing to remember is that while you can’t stop obstacles from appearing in life, you can devise smart ways to handle them. If you persevere, you can easily discover opportunities that have been waiting for you on the other side. Now, as you become more efficient at dealing with the failures, you will allow yourself to see the positive side in even the toughest of scenarios.

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Life

How Stress Can Actually Improve the Quality of Your Life

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Naturally, those of us who experience less stress in our lives are more likely to succeed. So, it’s important that you learn how to reduce your daily level of stress, right? Maybe not. Recent research has shown the common wisdom about stress might be dangerously inaccurate. Psychologists tracked the health of 30,000 adults in the United States over an 8-year period. Participants were asked two important questions:

1.    “How much stress have you experienced in the last year?”
2.    “Do you believe stress is harmful to your health?” (more…)

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Life

The Truth About the Law of Attraction

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When we want something, we generally imagine the form it will take when it manifests. If we’re not careful, however, we can find ourselves attached more to the imagined form than the actual desired outcome. This is like placing an online order and expecting it to come in a blue box shipped by UPS. If we then receive a red box delivered by FedEx, we might not realize that it’s what we ordered, and never even open it!

For example, most of us say that we want money, but when money comes in the form of a free coffee or a gift or a discount, we don’t see it for what it is. We overlook it, and maybe we even say “No, thanks” and decline the gift which is, in one way or another, still money. In doing so, we fail to appreciate the value of the discount, the gift, or the freebie. If it isn’t cash being handed to us, we don’t see it as a manifestation of our desire.

The law of attraction is a funny thing.

It is much more complex and much more intricate than what it seems to be and yet, at the same time, it’s so very simple: We always get what we want. We always receive more of the energy at which we vibrate. Always.

However, if we’re acting from the energy of “I don’t deserve it” or “I don’t think I’m worthy,” then whatever it is that we receive will be negated and essentially unseen. On the other hand, if we are open, observant, and maintaining an abundance mindset, we will receive our request on numerous levels and from plentiful sources!

“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” – Napoleon Hill

This is because we “place our order” not only through our words, but through our actions, our beliefs, and our thoughts.

Last month, I was open to receiving a new client. I didn’t know how it would happen, but I’d set my intention: I was going to get a new client. That night, out of nowhere, I got a message from an old student of mine. She was looking to hire me again as her coach for the upcoming college entrance exams in the U.S. But wait! I didn’t want an entrance exam client.

What I actually wanted was to get life and business coaching clients. This student was my “red box from Fed Ex.” I wanted to decline at first, but as I was about to reply, something made me stop. I asked myself, “Why am I rejecting this?”

This student is an amazing client. She pays on time. She’s not needy. She does her part. Best of all? She doesn’t short-change me. So I said yes, because I realized that the Universe was simply responding to the essence of my desire.

You see, my “Big Why” in everything I do has always been to facilitate an accelerated personal and business growth for my clients, and this student fit the bill in every way. She wanted the personal growth, she was ready to go all in and she reached out to me.

It didn’t look like the package I was expecting so I didn’t recognize it at first—and I nearly turned it away—but she was the perfect answer to my request.

Serving people like her has always been a driving force in my life.

The Universe knows that. It also knew that I wanted a client asap so that I could re-invest the money into my business, so it responded in the most ideal way… but in an unexpected form. And I came so close to missing it!

How many times have I missed other opportunities like this? How many times have I dismissed a “red box” because it wasn’t “blue?” I’ll never know. But I do know that, had I not stopped myself from sending a “No, thanks,” I would have felt as though the Universe wasn’t listening.

That’s the thing: the Universe is always listening.

The more open we are in receiving, the more we thrive. The more open our energy is, the greater the possibilities. Don’t just return that red box to the post office and keep waiting on a blue one. Ask yourself, first and foremost, if what you’re receiving at the moment matches up with your underlying desire.

See yourself living in abundance and you will attract it.” – Rhonda Byrne

The key is to be willing to receive anything and everything. How? Keep on reading1

1. Get clear on your “underlying desire.”

Identify exactly what it is that you really want—in my case, it was an ideal client (underlying) as opposed to a coaching client (surface)—and focus on that. Clear out all the mental noise and static that clouds your awareness.

2. Be flexible

Keep your eyes and mind open for anything that fits the description. When you ask for money, recognize that free coffee for what it is: $3 you were going to spend anyway, that can now remain in your pocket. Every penny on the ground, every coupon, it’s all money.

3. Keep an attitude of gratitude.

The more you appreciate what you have, the more that comes your way. Your grateful mindset opens the energetic door for more to flow your way, because “where attention goes, energy flows.” The more you focus on the things you want, the more you will draw them into your experience.

Remember, that the Universe responds to our requests in whatever way fits best within the big picture.

It’s a picture so big that we couldn’t possibly begin to see how it comes together. Trust it. Know that when you ask, you will receive. It may not come in the form you anticipate, but always in a form that responds to your underlying desire. You just have to be ready to see it.

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Life

7 Simple Ways to Master Your Emotions When Making Decisions

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A lot of people have big regrets when lying on their deathbed. These regrets are often related to bad decisions or decisions not taken. Thus, as it turns out, decision-making is dependent on great self-confidence. A person who has confidence in their decisions has an easier time making them.

Emotions also play a big role in all of this. This is a debate that has confronted two great thinkers. According to Descartes, “decisions are the product of the rational mind.” In other words, decision-making is essentially based on facts and mathematics.

But this thesis was refuted and proven to be wrong by Antonio Damasio in one of his works called “The Error of Descartes”. This was partly based on the story of Elliott, a kid that was very smart, who had above average rational capabilities, but incapable of making a decision, after a surgery to remove a brain tumor on the surface of his frontal lobes. After all his work in that matter, he concludes that a person who is incapable of emotion is incapable of making the most rational decisions.

The management of emotions is therefore completely inherent to good decision making, especially when making the most important decisions. To this end, here are 7 tips to put into practice to really master your emotions thus making the best decisions possible and never regreting them.

1. Take a step back

You must learn to take the time to identify and understand your emotions. Since physical reactions are emotionally related, also take the time to detect the reactions you have to some of your emotions. To be able to take the distance necessary to make decisions, it’s important to refer to your prefrontal cortex. This is the area of ​​the brain responsible for reasoning. To do so you need to put yourself in a stress-free environment for a few minutes.

“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent and committed decision.” – Tony Robbins

2. Breathe

The best way to do this is to learn to breathe deeply. This will allow activating your prefrontal cortex again, therefore, to have better control of your emotions so you do not react to them, let alone to the event that causes these emotions. Do this exercise for at least 15 minutes. It’s amazing how you can train yourself never to react, no matter what the situation. Ideally, let at least 24 hours go by before responding to a situation that would normally cause tension.

3. Pay attention

Once you are in the prefrontal cortex, put one hand on your abdomen, at the level of your intestines, and the other hand on your heart, and take the time to listen. These two parts of the body are the two major centers of vibrations and emotions. This is why it’s important to listen and pay attention to them.

The purpose of this exercise is to become aware of your gut and heart. What you need to remember is that the only person you need to trust is yourself. By practicing this exercise, one thing will become very clear: what the emotion you feel seeks to convey to you about the decision you have to make.

Since everything is energy, first make sure that the vibration of the decision you are about to make and that of your heart and gut are in sync. You will then know whether to go ahead with your decision or reject it based on whether you feel serenity or heaviness.

4. Discern untruths

It is important to know whether your nervousness is the result of an untruth you’ve told yourself. These can corrupt the vibrations that should help you make the right decision. You have to throw out all of these untruths and come to the decision-making without any filter. Stop thinking that you’re unlucky, that you’re in a bad situation, that your life is a failure, or that you are a victim.

5. Become aware of your emotions instead of avoiding them

To become aware of your emotions, you must learn to coach yourself. Ask yourself questions: How did you feel the last time you had to ask these types of questions? What did you get in return? Rename what you felt and the result you obtained from what you decided to do. You will thus be much better at assimilating, understanding, and welcoming your emotions.

6. Be as present as possible

There is no point in focusing on the big events surrounding the decision you want to make. Concentrate instead on the present moment, without analyzing the events. Judge based on emotions rather than the event. By being more present, you will be better able to listen to your emotions and feel them.

Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.” – John C. Maxwell

7. Make your emotions your allies

Each of your emotions speaks to you through the physical and physiological reactions that they generate in you. Look to the weight of their impact on you as an indicator. Only by listening to them, using them, and managing them can you manage your emotions.

Habit comes with practice. With time, these 7 points will become much more natural and will become automatic. You will make better decisions for yourself.  This is one of the best ways to not end up with one of the big regrets.

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