Life
4 Ways You Can Improve Your Self-Esteem Without Sabotaging Yourself

Stop feeling sorry for yourself and in case you’ve never been told, “sorry is a weak word.” You might even think your problem is unique and no one will ever know how you feel on the inside, but you know what?
Most of the time, people are all struggling with some basic problem and you’re not alone. You’re not the only one struggling from depressing moods and remain unhappy. You’re not the only one who receives bullying at school or suffering from a poor family relationship.
Moreover, you’re not the only one suffering from depression and low self-esteem. Almost everyone faces crucial problems such as deep pain, sadness, and self-doubt. Nevertheless, the feeling of not finding the motivation to do anything and the feeling of being in the darkest days of your life is insidious.
It gnaws at your social life, eating, studying, confidence, and, in other words, practically everything. It even causes talented people to give up and feel that the whole world has turned its back on them. And that’s why that needs to stop now.
If you want to improve your self-esteem, stay in a good mood, and become a happier person during every day of your life, here are some tips you need to put in place:
1. Accept The Fact That You’re In Charge Of Your Life
The fact is, in your life journey, you’re the one in the driver’s seat; you’re the one who makes the decision on what direction to drive every day of your life.
You might see people waving their hands on the road, asking you for a lift through your life’s journey, but you’re the one who makes the decision if you are going to help them or not.
Whenever there is an occasion that might lead to an accident and you’re only left with two options to make, you’re the one who gets to make the decision whether to dodge to the left or to the right.
The people inside the car might pull at you, some might give a shout, saying that turning to the left side is the correct way, but you’re the one who makes the decision and you will be the one to take responsibility for whatever happens to you.
Lil Wayne wrote: “you can play a role in my life, but not the lead.” If you understand this, you will grow. If you don’t, you will end up becoming what people want you to become instead of becoming what you want to become!
So start right now, make a pledge to yourself to take responsibility for whatever has happened to you in the past and resolve that from now on for any decision or situation, you’ll always remember and accept that you’re the one in control.
“Only you can control your future.” – Dr. Seuss
2. Join The 20% At The Top
The top 20% of the people in our society, earn and control 80% of the assets. According to Forbes and the Wall Street Journal, the top 1% of Americans earns and controls as much as 33% of the assets.
And the most interesting part of the discovery is that most millionaires, billionaires, and multi-billionaires started with nothing. In fact, they were once in the bottom 20% and worked their way up to the top 20%.
How did this set of people work their way to the top? Could it be a sort of super magic work? The truth is that they began to do something different with their lives, and in time, they start learning and doing the things that other successful people were doing.
You can also join the top 20% of the people in your society by doing something different that will make you stand out from the crowd. No one becomes excellent by accident; excellence requires a definite decision and a life-long commitment. So what others have done, you can do as well.
3. Learn The 3% Rule
Here’s a secret the big boys at the top will never tell you. However, the fact is that successful people do have a life-long formula that helps them grow quickly and keeps them in good shape for every day of their life-long commitment.
And the secret is that they make a decision to invest a certain amount of their income into their life. But here’s the one that has worked perfectly for majority of successful people. They simply invest 3% of their income into their life.
You can do this monthly or annually, whatever seems to work the best for you. If your annual income is $50,000 resolve to invest 3% of this income or $1500 into yourself.
So how on earth do you invest 3% of your income into your life? First, write down everything you think that will quickly help you achieve your goals. Then spend the 3% investment in yourself by purchasing all the materials that will help you learn and to quickly progress toward achieving your goals.
You can buy books, go to seminars, buy audio tapes, or hire a mentor. Whatever you think will help you swiftly proceed toward achieving your goals. This could be the best self-rewarding habit that you can ever teach yourself. Put this into practice now and see the new person you’ve become.
4. Strive To Become The Best
This means learning how to follow the leaders instead of following the followers. Make a list of the people you admire most. Ask yourself why you admire them and what you can do to become like them.
Indulge yourself into doing whatever they do, or to do better than they do. For example, Stephen King mentioned in one of his books that he reads at least 70 books a year. Do your best and set a goal of reading 75 to 80 books a year.
You probably understand what I mean now, you see, the key to becoming the best is to find what successful people do and break new ground by becoming someone that does it better.
If you can learn how to put all this into action, you will have done what 70% of the people who read this post won’t do. And I’m guessing that you don’t want to be part of those folks.
The best way to get results is to take action, so start your action now and see how positive you’ll become and what results you will get.
“Life is a gift, and it offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to give something back by becoming more.” – Tony Robbins
What are you going to commit to today that will help you in the future? Leave your thoughts below!
Life
Self-Sabotage: How to Stop Holding Yourself Hostage

It was easy to put the blame on “2020” but now we are here in a New Year…so how long are we going to use that line? While the turbulence of last year certainly shook things up, it’s not a license for us to no longer hold ourselves accountable. At the end of the day, choices and perspective can make a huge impact on the trajectory of our lives. So…is it time for you to assess whether or not your decisions are the ones actually holding you back? (more…)
Life
Here’s When Self Improvement Becomes Ineffective

I’ve spent hundreds of dollars on self-help books and seminars over the past three years. I’ve devoted thousands of hours reading blogs and listening to podcasts about personal growth and self-improvement with the goal of finding the answers that would “fix” me. After my divorce I became addicted to the idea that the answer to my happiness and healing was in a book, podcast or a blog. I kept waiting to read or hear that magic “Ah Ha” tip that would change my life forever. (more…)
Life
Your Life Has a Meaning: Here’s How to Find Out What It Is

Knowing the purpose of one’s existence in the world is a lingering thought for everyone. Some people may interpret it as a quest, as they try out new adventures and learn new skills. Meanwhile, others may view it as a mystery that slowly reveals itself as they spend their time on Earth. They say that their complete realization of their purpose would not come in this life but the next. (more…)
Life
10 Life Lessons I Learned in 2020 and What to Expect Next

The year 2020 has been full of ups and downs. And it is something that this generation has never been through before. And like most people, I put a lot of effort into planning, organizing, and setting goals for everything I wanted to achieve. The beginning of the year 2020 was great until the pandemic hit, everything changed. (more…)
- Success Advice4 weeks ago
5 Powerful Reasons Why You Should Write Down Your Goals
- Life3 weeks ago
3 of the Most Important Life Lessons You Can Learn From Sports
- Life4 weeks ago
How to Discover the Fears That Impede Your Behaviors and Thwart Your Plans
- Life4 weeks ago
How to Crush Fear, Beat Imposter Syndrome, and Create a Fulfilled Life
- Motivation3 weeks ago
How to Use the 3 Sins of Motivation to Achieve Your Goals
- Entrepreneurs3 weeks ago
Entrepreneurs: Here’s the Best Method to Help You Get Your Money Right
- Success Advice3 weeks ago
How Can I Stay Organized When I Have Too Much on My Plate? Here’s How:
- Life3 weeks ago
10 Remarkable Lessons From an Unconventional School Teacher
Sammy Blackmore
Mar 7, 2017 at 7:11 am
Stephen King reads 70 books a year? Wow! That’s like 5+ books in a month. I can’t even finish reading a novel within a month.
Laura
Nov 21, 2016 at 12:48 pm
I planned on doing this not too long ago so this article was too perfect for my read this morning. Ive always been one to give a lot, which imho, feels so satisfying when I do and I’ll never stop. The problem was I never gave to myself. Never invested time to make me better FIRST. That’s all about to change..
Thank you Cephas.
Dan
Oct 28, 2016 at 3:47 pm
I particularly like the 3% rule. I do this already in some form but to apply a budget means one will continually do so each year and benefit exponentially and, crucially, without worrying too much about the cost, as it’s an investment you have budgeted in advance.
Cylon
Oct 20, 2016 at 4:53 pm
Thanks for this great post Cephas!
Cephas
Oct 22, 2016 at 1:35 pm
Thank You so much Cylon!
Maria Stenvinkel
Oct 20, 2016 at 1:01 pm
Awesome post!!
I loved this part: “And the most interesting part of the discovery is that most millionaires, billionaires, and multi-billionaires started with nothing. In fact, they were once in the bottom 20% and worked their way up to the top 20%.”
And the 3% rule. Thanks a lot!
Cephas
Oct 22, 2016 at 1:45 pm
Thanks Maria,
Glad you enjoy the post!
Mark Tong
Oct 20, 2016 at 8:35 am
Excellent points Cephas!
Cephas
Oct 22, 2016 at 1:48 pm
Thanks so much Mark!