Life
“Where Do You See Yourself In 5 Years?” – Who Knows And Who Cares.
With all the self-improvement overload of information we get, we’re told that we must have goals. Goals are important and I personally set them 12 months in advance.
What’s incorrect is thinking you can realistically plan your life 5 years in advance.
The question I hate the most which we’ve all had in a job interview is:
“Where do you see yourself in 5 years?”
In my head I’m thinking:
“Retired on the beach with a New York Times Best Selling Book? I don’t freaking know!”
Not knowing is the best bit.
Too much certainty makes life really boring. Not knowing where you’re going to be in five years is awesome! If I rewind to 2011 when everything fell apart around me, I would never have predicted where I am today.
Back then I hated writing, had no clue what personal development was and thought my life was going to be miserable forever.
The surprise of seeing myself turn it all around is what makes me so proud. No one came and gave me something for free. I worked for what I have and fostered the proper mindset for success and you can too.
The parts I love about my life now are things I treasure most.
Uncertainty can be your best friend if you let it be. Stop trying to know everything in advance.
You’ll probably be wrong anyway.
Yep, that’s the sad news ladies and gentlemen.
Break out the tissues, shed a tear with me, accept that fact and then get to work. Life is full of suffering and you will definitely encounter a left hook to the face that will knock you flat on your ass. It will take you by surprise and your “5-year plan will take an instant backseat.”
In that moment, you’ll realize what you truly value and what your life is all about. Then you’ll rise and then fall again when the next event happens. Life is made up of these patterns.
“Once you accept this and understand that you’re never going to be your own fortune teller, shit gets real”
The case for short-term goals.
So why I don’t advocate for having these big, difficult, goals that exist in the Neverever Land of 5-year’s time: I’m a big believer in a couple of short-term goals. You need a tiny bit of direction otherwise you’ll get lazy and watch Netflix thinking you’ve got everything covered.
As an example, my two goals right now are changing my career and doing some big public speaking gigs. These two goals are both joined at the hip with my life’s purpose. They motivate me every day to get my lazy ass out of bed and put in the work.
As for five years’ time, I have no clue. I know the direction but I welcome the surprises.
Your future is similar to mine. You’ll need some big goals to get you there but trying to predict it is pointless.
“Thinking you have it all figured out is the disease of someone that thinks they know it all”
This mindset will get you into deep trouble.
Part of being humble is knowing that you don’t have all the answers. What matters is that you have faith in yourself and genuinely believe you can achieve some great accomplishments. What those exact accomplishments are is detail that is not required.
Not getting what you want is all part of the game.
The stupid thing about 5-year plus goals and visions is that it doesn’t take into account one thing: not getting what you want is so important.
If I’d got the successful long-term business I wanted five years ago, then I would never have hit rock-bottom and discovered personal development or blogging. I’d be running a business that I hate, to impress friends that I don’t like, to buy rubbish that brings me no happiness.
When you fail or don’t get what you want, you should be happy. It means there is going to be another avenue. It’s a sign.
Thinking you’ve got it all figured out and in five years you’ll have done X forgets about this very important detail.
“It seems counter-intuitive but not getting what you want is how you get what you need”
What should you focus on then?
Two big short-term goals and a purpose for your life. Short and sharp, just the way I like it, amigo.
Once you know why you exist on this planet, everything else will fall into place and the need for a 5-year plus plan will go out the window.
For example, my life purpose of inspiring the world through entrepreneurship and personal development could be achieved through the following ways:
– Speaking
– Writing books
– Blogging
– Starting a podcast
– Running events
– Working for a global brand
There are so many ways to achieve my life’s purpose and who really cares how I do it. I’d like to think it will be blogging. If I were to back a winner today, it would be probably blogging although I have a habit of being wrong about such matters of life.
The hardest bit is knowing your life’s purpose. Once you know that, the rest is execution. Lose the obsession for caring about which vehicle you end up using to fulfil your purpose – it’s not so important.
Final Thought.
I hope I’ve inspired you to rethink these long-term scenarios in which you’ll almost always be wrong. I hope you can see now how crucial the macro is compared with the micro.
Don’t get caught up in the details and quit being a wannabe fortune-teller. Those wrinkly old things never did serve any of us any good.
Get to work and remember to dream big.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
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Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
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Read quality literature in your free time.
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Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
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Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
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Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
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