1. The truth is not elegant
Ever wonder why I swear, use the word “loser,” and am blunt or direct? It’s because the truth is not elegant. I’m not trying to impress you; I’m trying to interrupt your pattern. Change is not easy and so if I talk to you in a quiet, polite voice, you’re not going to move your ass into action.
“Stop trying to be polite and elegant all the time because the only person you need to impress is yourself”
2. Tap into what you already have
Most of what you want to achieve in your life can already be found within yourself. You already have most of what is needed to be successful. The art is figuring out how to tap into your already unlimited potential. Rather than trying to become something you are not, get comfortable with who you are.
3. Write stuff down
Your retention rate increases by 40%-50% if you write stuff down. Rather than sit passively and listen, take notes and write stuff down. Even if you know the content you are hearing already, still write it down. Repetition is the mother of skill.
Hearing the same content said a hundred different ways makes you ten times stronger and more intelligent. Eventually, one of those ways will be said in such a way that you can process the idea and use it in your own life.
4. Energy makes you beautiful
Ever wondered how people who don’t appear to be physically beautiful can still date the most attractive partners? It’s called energy. These unique individuals give off an energy that is so beautiful and infectious that they attract the opposite sex despite the way they may look. It’s not all about looks you know.
5. Energy comes from the way you move your body
The single most important thing to create energy in your body is movement. The way you move your body can help to increase your energy levels. Become conscious of how you stand. Realize that you can flick a switch at any moment and become crazy and outrageous. Try this:
– Do star jumps
– Play your favorite song on your phone and sing out loud
– Jump on a trampoline for five minutes
These little acts of movement will completely change your energy within minutes. Don’t tell me you can’t change your energy because you can.
For added energy watch what you eat and get plenty of sleep. Common sense if you ask me.
6. The truth is uncomfortable
I recently admitted to myself that I was sabotaging my success with thoughts like “I’m not enough.” It hurts to know the truth and it’s uncomfortable. Once you can move past this, you can make the real changes required. Stop softening the truth or avoiding it.
7. Pain can either drive you or destroy you
Pain is a double-edged sword, my friends. It can drive you to make a change and take your life to the next level or it can destroy you and cause suffering. How would you like to use pain? I choose to let pain drive me which is why I freaking love it!
8. You are here for emotion
There’s a reason you attend events, concerts and seminars; you are searching for emotion. We crave emotion in everyday life and these places allow us to embrace emotion. You get to feel emotions of joy, happiness and inspiration. You do things to experience emotion.
9. More than five hours on social media means you are depressed
Are you on social media for five hours or more? If you are, studies show you are depressed. It turns out that social media forces us into a state of comparing our lives to everyone else’s. This process makes us incredibly depressed. Stopped being consumed by social media. Create instead.
10. Most people don’t do well. Focus on those who do.
A lot of people don’t do very well at life. The one’s who do good at life are rare and you should focus your time understanding why that is. You can learn so much from these amazing individuals.
11. Great humans have had the toughest lives
All those extraordinary people that you admire all had the toughest lives. Having a really tough life is what will give you the drive and that’s what the great humans you admire understand. Your tough life is your biggest asset if you will let it be.
“Embrace the toughness. Use the pain to drive you”
12. Blaming only screws you
When you blame the environment, your workplace, the economy, your doctor, your parents, your spouse or anything for that matter, you are only screwing yourself. Blaming takes the responsibility away from you and transfers it to an innocent third party.
Turn blame into gratitude and you’ll see a real life miracle. Stop wanting everything and everyone to be perfect because they’ll never meet your expectations. Everyone’s expectations are different.
13. Information without emotion is forgotten
Where were you on September 11th 2001? I bet you can remember exactly where you were. The reason you remember is because you consumed the events of that day while enduring an extreme level of emotion. That place and time will never be forgotten because of that emotion.
The same goes for learning. Introduce emotion into the learning environment and the retention rate goes up significantly.
14. Freedom happens when you take back control
Want to be free again? Take back control. Stop letting events control you and give these same events an empowering meaning. You can only be free when you get out of your head and lead with your heart again. Being free feels so good so give yourself that gift. The decision is yours.
15. The ultimate resource is emotion
If I were to identify the one resource that you have to achieve anything it would be your emotions. Your emotions can drive you to commit suicide or marry the love of your life. You choose your emotions and the one’s you will use moment to moment.
If a negative emotion starts to come through, break the pattern. Escape the moment and go to your happy place. Remember something that makes you appreciate who you are and what you have.
16. Fear Vs Desire
It can be said that life is a dance between your fears and your desires. Get the balance right and you take back control. Get the balance wrong and you’re guaranteed to suffer.
17. Do more for others than anybody else
Why do millions of people listen to what I say every day? They listen because I do more for them than anybody else in a similar position to me. I genuinely care and I make it about everybody else, not about me.
“Find more ways to give more rather than trying to be someone you are not to impress people”
18. The most important skill is influence
If I could give you one skill to master its influence. Influence makes you a leader and it means you have the trust of the people. When people trust you, you can inspire them to take action.
You can’t influence someone though unless you first know what influences them. Where people get it wrong is that what influences you, is very different to how everyone else is influenced. Understand the driving force behind the person you are trying to influence and then they will take action.
Inspiring people to take action and make a change is one of the most fulfilling things you can ever achieve. It’s what I attempt to do every day and I love it.
19. When you reach your best, there’s always another level
Have you ever achieved a level of success and then discovered you could actually go further? This happens because when you get to the top, there’s always another level.
There’s always further to go and the journey never ends. It’s for this reason that you need to stop and smell the roses once in a while. Otherwise, you’ll never appreciate how far you’ve come. Be present once in a while and focus on the progress you’ve made. You have come much further than you realize. Enjoy it!
20. Don’t wait to laugh
It’s so easy for us to delay gratification. If something is funny, then laugh about it now. Don’t say “someday we’ll laugh about this.” Every time you delay, you will forget. Your brain has enough to think about already. Laughing right now is one of the best things you can do. Shall we try it?
21. Your brain is designed to make you survive
We find it hard to be happy because we rely on our brain which only knows how to make us survive. Your happiness comes from within. The moment you ask your brain a question, all it knows how to do is look for what is wrong and then highlight that fact to you, so you avoid harms way.
22. Our reasons for feeling lousy don’t need to be big
Ever wondered why it’s so easy to feel lousy? It’s because we only need small reasons to feel like crap. We’re experts in letting things like people, annoying habits or someone stealing our car spot ruin our day. We’ve become entitled and overly sensitive to all the wrong things. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Shake it off. Change your state!
23. New results require new actions
If you don’t like your results, then take some new actions. Sounds simplistic and that’s because it is. Try something you haven’t done before and you’ll quickly find a new way of getting different results.
24. What you focus on is what you’ll physically feel
If you focus on your other half cheating on you, then you’ll physically feel it. What we focus on, is what we feel throughout our body. Our body can’t tell the difference between what you are thinking a lot of the time and what is happening in the real world.
There’s heaps of power in this truth and you can feel good feelings or negative ones depending on what you focus on.
If you focus too much on what you’re missing, you’ll become messed up.
If you focus on what you can’t control, you’ll feel depressed.
If you focus on the past too much, you’ll feel dreadful.
25. Do what you did in the beginning at the end
If any type of relationship you have is coming to an end, do what you did in the beginning. At the start you are always more inspired and full of energy. Once you get to know someone, it’s easy to let these positive emotions disappear.
Always do the nice things you do in the beginning and there will never be an end to a relationship. The difference is that at the start of a relationship, you are not evaluating what you are getting and you’re focused on giving. Interesting huh?
26. Absolute certainty has power
Ever met someone who is at the top of their game? You’ll notice they have absolute certainty about who they are and their goals. Certainty gives you power in an uncertain world where everyone is running around scared from all the bad news that’s so easy to find.
27. Complexity is the enemy of execution
If you are failing to execute it’s because you are surrounded in complexity. Simple things are easy to take action on. Whatever you create in this lifetime, keep it simple. The simpler something is, the more people you can reach, inspire and transform.
“It’s one hundred times harder to make something simple than it is to be complex and long-winded”
28. Money doesn’t change people it magnifies who you are
If you are a tight ass before you make your millions, then you’ll be a tight ass when you are rich. Money doesn’t change you; it just shows more of who you are in greater detail.
Focus on becoming a phenomenal person when you’re not rich and then when you are, you’ll magnify all of your good traits, to give more to the world. What you give is what will make you fulfilled.
29. Happy people are rare
In fact, there are quite a few billionaires and more are being created every day. What’s rare are people from the past who are truly happy like the Nelson Mandela and Mother Teresa.
30. What’s wrong is available and so is what’s right
You can access what’s right and what’s wrong simultaneously. Make the smart choice and choose the good from every situation. It takes more discipline to choose what’s right, but you’ll be ten times more powerful if you do.
31. You can’t eliminate suffering altogether
The myth that we can avoid suffering is total BS. Suffering is guaranteed, but it gives us so much valuable motivation. It shows us what we don’t want, so we can have more of what we do want.
“Suffering can take us to the lowest point in our life and then help us to go all the way to the top again”
32. Move from suffering to appreciation
Suffering is caused by obsessing about ourselves too much. When we focus too much on ourselves, we go into the mind, which causes us to suffer. Our mind wants to help us find what is wrong. You know you are triggering a state of suffering when you use one of these three words:
When you appreciate and enjoy things, this focus takes your mind off looking for what’s wrong. You can also end suffering by growing more, loving more, giving more and being grateful.
When you end suffering, you’ll find that you become a light for others. Ending suffering causes everyone to want to be around you. I’d say that’s pretty good motivation right there.
33. It’s all small stuff
Have you heard the saying “don’t sweat the small stuff?” Guess what? Everything you sweat about is the small stuff. Remember that next time you feel yourself worrying about anything at all.
34. Negative thoughts are patterns
All a negative thought is, is a pattern you’ve been running for years without even realizing it. You do not own this negative thought because you’ll pretty quickly find out that everyone around you has the same negative thought.
If you start to own a negative thought as your own, then you are screwed. Your problems are not unique and are shared by everyone. Remember that the next time you think that your thoughts are unique to you and no one else can understand them.
Start becoming curious about your negative thoughts and that will change your life. Being curious allows you to become consciously aware and to kill these negative thoughts.
35. If there’s a way out you’ll revert to the past
This is why having a plan b is not a good idea. Only having one option forces you to succeed and to find a way when all hope seems lost.
“Burn the boats so you’re forced to take the island”
36. The mind looks for what’s wrong
Your negative thoughts are like small monsters that you can kill early on when they don’t have any real size. The best way to kill negative thoughts is to label them the moment they appear. Label your negative thoughts with words like silly, disempowering, untrue etc.
37. Trade your expectations for appreciation
That’s when your life will transform.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?
In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far.
These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.
1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.
This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.
What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.
“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou
2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.
This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.
However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .
3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.
When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.
However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!
The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!
If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!
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