Life
Stop Wasting Your Emotional Energy Committing These 3 Common Pitfalls
I’ve racked my brain for years on how to cause life to happen, as opposed to just letting it unfold. My successes have varied all the way from run-of-the-mill fulfillment to complete emotional turmoil. However, in recent past, I’ve come across a few critical distinctions to salvaging precious energy while making life work—most notably with the people in.
If you look at the human condition, we weren’t trained to care for others. With the primary function of the brain set in survival mode, it’s not natural for us to be around others. Yet, it’s essentially impossible to live a fulfilling life on one’s own.
As I’ve gone through the trials and tribulations of friendships, relationships and business partnerships, there are several scenarios that pop up consistently. Human nature is to handle it a certain way yet it often results in a severe loss of power or freedom in the interaction or relationship.
Here are three common communication pitfalls that by avoiding, can save you copious amounts of energy to direct towards more important things in life:
1. Taking Requests Personally
If you think about it, life is an ongoing series of conversational requests. Making friends, getting a job, and getting married are all instances where a question is involved prior to the life event happening or not.
What’s important to look at, is how we make these requests and how we handle the outcome. It’s very natural to focus on the desired outcome when making the request however, it clearly deters the conviction behind the request. By remaining on the field and dialed in on what you’re committed to, there’s no attachment to the result—putting the other party at ease and free to choose yes or no.
Moreover, should they say no to your request, you are able to take it for what it is. They’re saying no to the request, not to you. There’s no need to identify or associate with it because what you’re committed to supersedes all. It’s just yes or no — that’s it. If the answer fulfills on your commitment, great. If not, you go back to work. End of story.
“Even a dead fish can go with the flow.” – Jim Hightower
2. Taking Feedback Personally
One of life’s certainties is you’re going to receive unwanted feedback. How you handle this forgone truth however, makes all the difference. Because we pride ourselves on our beliefs, many people automatically associate feedback as an attack.
We think that someone giving us feedback is code for “you’re not good enough,” “you don’t belong,” or “you’re going to end up alone.” This type of neuro-association obviously doesn’t lead to very healthy responses, typically ending in communication breakdowns.
A great way to overcome this default response is to flip the lense. Instead of viewing feedback as a personal attack, we see it as coaching. Very successful people view everyone in their life as a coach—someone invested in the improvement of a particular person.
By viewing everyone who provides feedback—no matter how much we don’t appreciate its delivery—we view others as people taking on leadership roles in our lives. When someone volunteers to lead something, they’re taking responsibility for those they are leading. Great leaders don’t create followers—they create more leaders.
3. Listening To Our Internal Judgment
It’s crazy to think just how often we take ourselves out of the game of life by simply staying in our head and listening to the ongoing judgment being recited. That inner dialogue is no genius. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.
The only way we can create change in life is through action. Action doesn’t happen by thinking or feeling. They may be a prerequisite to a certain degree, but you can’t think your way into a promotion or a new relationship. You have to stay in the game.
By acknowledging our judgment as unhelpful dodging of responsibility instead of a roadmap to situational success, we can remain present and distinguish the best ways to move the conversation forward. The default of the mind is not forward momentum. We must cause positive results.
“Either you run the day or the day runs you.” – Jim Rohn
Bringing It All Together
Life wouldn’t be life without the challenging moments, however, we often make things harder than they have to be. We allow our view of things to dictate how we treat others in varying situations.
By understanding the alternative views we can try on during times we typically break down, we can preserve energy better spent elsewhere—on making a difference for other people. The energy you save from not taking requests or feedback personally and quieting your internal judgment will light you up as much as the alternative typically brings you down.
The extra energy you walk around with will be impossible to ignore, and everyone will want to know where they can get it for themselves. Leave the door wide open for you to be a leader for your community and facilitate a better future of human interaction with the people that matter most to you.
How do you maintain your emotional energy at a steady level? Let us know your tips in the comments below!
Image courtesy of Twenty20.com
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
-
Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
-
Read quality literature in your free time.
-
Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
-
Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
-
Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
Change Your Mindset
The Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?
Most people chase success only to find emptiness, this model reveals why true happiness lies somewhere else.
In a world driven by rapid technological growth and constant competition, many people unknowingly trade joy for achievement. (more…)
Change Your Mindset
The Secret Daily Routines Behind History’s Most Brilliant Thinkers
Uncover the daily rituals and hidden habits that powered history’s most brilliant minds to success.
Why Daily Rituals Matter
Every great achiever has one thing in common: discipline. Behind the novels, inventions, discoveries, and masterpieces are small, consistent habits repeated daily. (more…)
Finances
From Debt to Financial Independence: A Practical Roadmap Anyone Can Follow
It’s about having control over your money and not letting money control you.
The 21st century has brought incredible opportunities but also new challenges. Rapid technological change, global uncertainty, and shifting lifestyles have made many people think more deeply about financial freedom. (more…)
-
Change Your Mindset3 weeks agoWork-Life Balance Isn’t a Myth: Here’s How to Actually Make It Happen
-
Change Your Mindset4 weeks agoThe Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?
-
Life3 weeks ago9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
-
Success Advice2 weeks agoInside the TikTok Resume Hack That’s Fooling Recruiters (For Now)
-
Change Your Mindset2 weeks agoThe One Leadership Habit That Separates the Great From the Forgettable
-
Personal Development1 week agoThis Silent Habit Might Be Sabotaging Your Career
-
Business1 week agoWhy Your E-Commerce Fulfilment Is Probably Broken (And How to Fix It)
-
Shift Your Mindset3 days ago11 E’s That Define Every Great Leader And Why Most People Miss Them



2 Comments