Life
How To Control Your Thoughts, Rebuild Your Brain, and Become a Zen Master

This is the final installation of a three part series on identifying and eliminating limiting beliefs and ultimately becoming a master of your thoughts. In our first post we learned how to uncover and deconstruct the limiting beliefs that are holding you down. In our second post we revealed four questions to ask yourself to blast away these beliefs and achieve more! Finally, we dive into how you can take back control of your thoughts through a quick daily meditation ritual.
With twenty minutes a day you can drastically change the way you see the world and approach any situation. Meditation is often seen as a sort of “woo-woo” practice however science has proven that a daily meditation practice can help rebuild your brain’s gray matter in as little as eight weeks! On top of that it has been proven to lower blood pressure, help with diet, and reduce tension. In the episode “Unleash The Power Of Meditation” Matt dives into the six phase framework of The Envisioning Method and how you can start reaping these health benefits today.
To begin, find a place you can be completely alone and free from distraction. A place where you can be un-interrupted by the noise of the day for at least twenty minutes. Next, find a position you feel comfortable in and can easily take deep breathes. Matt notes that while lying down may seen like a great position, it is often too easy to fall asleep.
Once you are comfortable, take a few deep breaths and begin to work through each phase individually below:
1. Connection
Take a moment to realize that everything truly is connected. Everything on this planet is made up of organic matter and largely the same thing. Today, you may encounter tense situations, you may meet with someone who intimidates you. Take a deep breath, visualize these situations, and realize there’s no difference between you and them at a base level.
Remember everyone goes through hardships, everyone struggles with their thoughts from time to time. Keeping this view of people and the world will help you find perspective and not be too intimidated or disconnected from the world around you.
“Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” – Marcel Proust
2. Gratitude
Gratitude has been scientifically proven to have health benefits. Not only does it make you an overall happier human but it can also help with sleep and other health issues. Here we want to take a few moments to think on and identify what we are truly grateful for. Gratitude starts from within, begin thinking about your inner workings.
Are you grateful for the type of person you are? For your morals? Values? Your Health? Then begin to move externally. What or who around you are you grateful for? Taking these moments to identify specific things around you that bring you joy will even subconsciously hold them with you throughout your day and increase joy and empathy.
3. Forgiveness
It was Gandhi who once said “Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong. The weak, cannot forgive.” Take a few moments and think about any grudges you may be holding on to however small they may be. Have you been avoiding that friend who stood you up? Stubbornly refusing to reach out to a loved one or friend you feel wronged you?
Realize these negative emotions are there and then begin to let them go. Holding a grudge even subconsciously can have negative impacts on your day to day life. This may not happen all at once, it could take time to completely let things go and heal these wounds but realizing they are there and that they are not good for you is the first step in healing. Remember, forgiving them is not for their benefit, it’s for you! So think hard on it and begin to let grudges go that truly don’t matter.
4. Visualize Your Day
Think about what you have to get done today. Begin visualizing your day from the moment you open your eyes as the best day it could possibly be. You stand up and get moving and things seem to fall into place. You knock out those reports you had been putting off, you deliver your presentation and everyone stands up and claps at the close.
When you walk into that big client meeting you are greeted with handshakes and smiles and your proposal is accepted because you know your clients. Allowing yourself to see your day like this through your thoughts primes you for the best. When you’re thinking about the best possible scenario you’re ignoring the worst case scenario and seeing the potential greatness in your day ahead.
5. Visualize Your Future
What are your goals for the next three years? Do you want a house? A new car? Maybe you want to provide something for your family. Take this time to see into the future that you want. That perfect future where life has dealt you a full house and you’ve achieved your dreams. See this and believe you can make it there and know that through your actions this future will one day be realized.
“The harder you work… and visualize something, the luckier you get.” – Seal
6. Blessing
Now that you’ve taken the time to acknowledge what you are grateful for, begin to forgive the grudges you may be holding, and look into the future and see your perfect day; begin focusing on your breath. Take a few minutes to feel your body relaxed and enjoy some silence with your thoughts. Once you feel completed, stand up and get ready to approach the day with an entirely new perspective, seeing the beauty and potential in every moment.
To learn more about the powers of meditation you can listen to the full episode “Unleash The Power Of Meditation”. Learn more about the Envisioning Method and how to live a happier and more fulfilling life with Vishen Lakhiani and others on The Science of Success.
How has meditation changed your life? Leave your thoughts below!
Life
The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance
Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see? (more…)
Life
Failing is More Important Than Succeeding
Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

People often consider failure a stigma. Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life. (more…)
Life
5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.
Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.
Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.
Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.
However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.
Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:
1. Unconscious Sabotage
Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.
This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.
Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.
This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.
3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma
4. A strong need for control
5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained
What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?
There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:
- Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
- Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
- Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
- Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.
It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.
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