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Here’s How Seeing the Bigger Picture Helps With Decision Making

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how to see the bigger picture to make better decisions
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Seeing the big picture helps in making the best decisions to keep you on track towards your vision. Around Thanksgiving, on a beautiful Saturday, we took our son to a pumpkin patch farm together with one of his friends where they got to see and feed bunch of farm animals. We took a small farm train pulled by a tractor to wander around the farm, pick their pumpkins and few other fun activities. My favorite was the haystack maze! It proved to me once more the importance of seeing the bigger picture to make the right decisions.

When I lost sight of my son for about a minute inside the maze and started making turns without any reason, it was obvious that I had no idea how to make the right decision on which way to go. I even thought of pulling up my phone, go to google maps so I could see myself and the maze from above. While it would help me to figure out how to get out, I still wouldn’t be able to see my son on google maps! Obviously, I found them soon, chasing each other and having fun.

For visual simplicity, let’s have a look at the one below I made with domino pieces. Entering from the left, it is not very difficult to figure out that Spider Man should keep straight for the right track to get out. 

Maze from the top

However, it will look something like this from Spider Man’s perspective/vision. 

Maze first person view

When we see the maze from the top, it is much easier to make the right decision on which way to go in order to make it out. However, not that easy when you cannot see that top view.

Just like the maze analogy, whenever we are to make a decision (for example; Should we approve the investment for that project?) we can remind ourselves to try to see the “bigger picture” (Will that project help us achieve our team’s long-term priorities, beyond its financial analysis only?). By doing so, not only will decision making become much easier, but also the decisions we make will be more in line with our ultimate vision and where we want to go.

How do we get the top view of the maze when we are inside it?

After I found my son and his friend in the maze, we kept playing for a while longer. As we kept making the same turns one after another repeatedly, the kids started saying things like “I know where to go from here” or “we should go left here and then right for the exit”. I was not surprised hearing them as the maze started looking familiar to me as well, very different than our initial few minutes inside. I also figured that I was building a rough top view of the maze in my mind as we kept making those turns.

Practice, and therefore experience, is one thing that helps seeing the bigger picture

While, not as simple as the maze analogy, watching a soccer game on TV vs. actually playing it is another good one. Having played soccer as center midfielder since childhood, I can assure you that the view when you are on the field is nowhere near what you see on the TV screen.

To roughly illustrate, below are two screenshots from my FIFA20 game. Firmino, red circled, is about to receive the ball around the center circle. It seems that he has few options here, especially two of them are quite obvious; either pass it towards his left to the teammate unmarked or try a little difficult through pass to his teammate making a dash at the top.

Soccer view from the top

However, things look a little different from Firmino’s own vision. Below is the best angle I was able to get on FIFA20 but it should be somewhat how he sees the field at the same exact moment.

Soccer first person view

It is very different than how we see it on the screen, isn’t it? That’s why before he receives the ball, Firmino checks around a few times; his left, right and behind, builds a rough top view in his mind and makes the decision accordingly when he receives the ball. Building a good peripheral vision is one of the most important skills for center midfielders and attackers.

Just as soccer players build a better vision (the “bigger picture”) by checking around very often while off the ball, so that they can make better decisions when they get the ball, we can do similarly.

Looking at the situation from different angles to build a broader perspective helps seeing the bigger picture to make better decisions more easily.

While decision making as whole is a big topic and beyond the scope of this article, I am encouraged to highlight that practice, therefore experience, and broadening perspective by looking at the situation from different angles, definitely helps seeing the big picture, which ultimately aids decision making.

I heard many times people saying let’s step back and look at the bigger picture here, not necessarily explaining the how though. Therefore, I wanted to share what helped me so far.It could even be as simple as just reminding ourselves the significance of the bigger picture whenever we are about to make a decision and give it a try through our own authentic ways. 

I am Kaan Demiryurek, and I currently work at PepsiCo, R&D. I am an engineer by background, BSc. Food Engineering, and I have big interest in philosophy, psychology and history, as I believe personal interest in these areas complements well with my educational background. Here is my LinkedIn profile, http://linkedin.com/in/kaan-demiryurek-3513691b.

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Life

Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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Life

3 Simple Steps to Cultivate Courage and Create a Life of Meaning

we cultivate meaning in our lives when we pursue our calling

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Our deepest human desire is to cultivate meaning in our lives. Our deepest human need is to survive. (more…)

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Life

Grit: The Key to Your Ultimate Greatness

Grit is an overlooked aspect of success, but it plays a critical role.

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A grit mindset is an essential key to your greatness. It’s what separates those who achieve their goals from those who give up and never reach their potential. It’s also the difference between success and failure, happiness and misery. If you want to be great and achieve your dreams, then you need grit. Luckily, it’s something that can be learned. Please keep reading to learn more about grit and discover four ways to develop it. (more…)

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