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Changing the Way You Interact Can Change Your Life

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People talking

As an individual in his mid-twenties, it saddens me to look around and see the majority of people, especially my generation of eighteen through thirty-five, let technology take over their lives.

For example, I walk into Starbucks and watch as the customer does not even look at the cashier as they take their order because they are on their phone or families at restaurants not talking with one another because they are on their phone. These observances are becoming such casual occurrences that it is becoming normal.

I notice this most when I speak with people in the age range from eighteen through thirty-five that are on dating via dating apps. This is an easy way to date because one gets to hide behind a computer, take time constructing a message, and if the other person is not receptive, then it does not seem like a full rejection because you never met the other person.

I challenge you to do these next three things in order to be different and unforgettable:

1. Be vulnerable

Although I have seen wonderful relationships form from online dating, whatever happened to going out and approaching a cute girl or guy. Why can we not just meet with someone instead of talking to them online for days and perhaps not even get the courage to meet them in person for fear that we will not be able to carry on the conversation?

This also applies to our everyday relationships. When we are vulnerable, we are letting people know that we are all one. Typically, we have the same problems in life and want the same things when it is all said and done.

“A person is, among all else, a material thing, easily torn and not easily mended.” – Ian McEwan

We are scared of putting ourselves out there. We have become so comfortable taking the easy route, that when faced with a more challenging scenario, we often do not know how to act.

2. Do not text people, call them

Another example of what is becoming normal is texting and no longer receiving as many calls as before. The only day I will receive calls from the majority of my friends and family is on my birthday. It is sad that they only think they should call me on my birthday because it is supposed to be a special day.

What makes any other day not as special? It has become strange to hear my phone ring because if it does, it is a text. When one calls someone, it will be different and when you hear someone’s voice, you can judge a lot better exactly what they are saying and how they feel.

A text does not require much effort. However, making a call requires you to take the time to make the call and focus on what one is saying over the phone. It is strange when I get a call, but refreshing to hear someone’s voice. Make a call, and make someone’s day.

“The more social media we have, the more we think we’re connecting, yet we are really disconnecting from each other.” – JR

3. Break the cycle of loneliness

While talking to people, I realize they have a huge desire to vent about what is going on in their life. Almost every day, I speak to someone, genuinely ask leading questions about their subject of interest and after a few minutes, their body tension breaks and they let out a sigh of relief.

People do not take the time to get to know people’s souls. In our self-serving culture, rarely do my own friends and family ask me about things that truly matter to me. People desire to belong and to feel loved, valued and understood. While observing people, rarely do they go out of their way to make the other person in their conversation feel special. Be the person who listens and you will make their day.

When many people are lonely and feel isolated, we must not forget to have physical interactions with human beings. This is a rare quality now-a-days thus when you take the time to call people and become vulnerable, you will be unforgettable.

When was the last time a phone call changed your life? Leave your thoughts below!

Armando Quintana III strives to make every day a novel one by treating his life as one big experiment. He's a published writer, signed model, created an educational non-profit, and worked with multiple start-ups helping them excel in sales and marketing. He can be reached @armandoq3 on Instagram or Facebook.

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Life

How Learning the Skill of Hope Can Change Everything

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life

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Hope as a skill
Image Credit: Midjourney

Hope isn’t wishful thinking. It’s a state of being and a skill that has profound evidence of helping people achieve success in life.

Wishful thinking, on the other hand, is like having dreams in the sky without a ladder to climb, having a destination without a map, or trying to operate a jet-engine airplane without instructions. It sounds nice but is impossible to realize. You don’t have what you need to make it happen!

What Real Hope Is

Real hope is actionable, practical, and realistic. Better yet, it’s feasible and can be learned.

One popular approach is Hope Theory. This concept is used by colleges to study how hope impacts students’ academic performance. Researchers found that students with high levels of hope achieve better grades and are more likely to graduate compared to those with less hope.

Hope can be broken down into two components:

  1. Pathways – The “how to” of hope. This is where people think of and establish plans for achieving their goals.
  2. Agency – The “I can” of hope. This is the belief that the person can accomplish their goals.

Does Hope Really Work?

According to Webster’s Dictionary, hope as a noun is defined as: “desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment.”

As humans, we are wired to crave fulfillment. We have the ability to envision it and, through hope, make it a reality.

My Experience with Hope

For 13 years, I was a hopeless human. During my time working at a luxury hotel as a front desk agent earning $11.42 per hour, I felt the sting of hopelessness the most.

The regret of feeling my time was being stolen from me lingered every time I clocked in. Eventually, I decided to do something about it.

I gave myself permission to hope for something better. I began establishing pathways to success and regained agency by learning from self-help books and seeking mentorship.

Because I took action toward something I desired, I now feel more hope and joy than I ever felt hopelessness. Hope changed me.

Hope Actually Improves Your Life

Wishful thinking doesn’t work, and false hope is equally ineffective. Real hope, however, is directly tied to success in all areas of life.

Studies show that hopeful people tend to:

  • Demonstrate better problem-solving skills
  • Cultivate healthier relationships
  • Maintain stronger motivation to achieve goals
  • Exhibit better work ethic
  • Have a positive outlook on life

These benefits can impact work life, family life, habit-building, mental health, physical health, and spiritual practice. Imagine how much better your life could be by applying real hope to all these areas.

How to Develop the Skill to Hope

As acclaimed French writer Jean Giono wrote in The Man Who Planted Trees:
“There are also times in life when a person has to rush off in pursuit of hopefulness.”

If you are at one of those times, here are ways to develop the skill to hope:

1. Dream Again

To cultivate hope, you need to believe in its possibility. Start by:

  • Reflecting on what you’re passionate about, your values, and what you want to achieve.
  • Writing your dreams down, sharing them with someone encouraging, or saying them out loud.
  • Creating a vision board to make your dreams feel more tangible.

Dreams are the foundation of hope—they give you something meaningful to aspire toward.

2. Create an Environment of Hope

  • Set Goals: Write down your goals and create a plan to achieve them.
  • Visualize Success: Use inspirational quotes, photos, or tools like dumbbells or canvases to remind yourself of your goals.
  • Build a Resource Library: Collect books, eBooks, or audiobooks about hope and success to inspire you.

An environment that fosters hope will keep you motivated, resilient, and focused.

3. Face the Challenges

Don’t avoid challenges—overcoming them builds confidence. Participating in challenging activities, like strategic games, can enhance your problem-solving skills and reinforce hope.

4. Commit to Wisdom

Seek wisdom from those who have achieved what you aspire to. Whether through books, blogs, or social media platforms, learn from their journeys. Wisdom provides the foundation for real, actionable hope.

5. Take Note of Small Wins

Reflecting on past victories can fuel your hope for the future. Ask yourself:

  • What challenges have I already overcome?
  • How did I feel when I succeeded?

By remembering those feelings of happiness, relief, or satisfaction, your brain will naturally adopt a more hopeful mindset.

Conclusion

Hope is more than wishful thinking—it’s a powerful skill that can transform your life. By dreaming again, creating a hopeful environment, facing challenges, seeking wisdom, and celebrating small wins, you can develop the real hope necessary for success in all aspects of life.

Let hope guide you toward a brighter, more fulfilling future.

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Life

The 5 Stages of a Quarter-Life Crisis & What You Can Do

A quarter-life crisis isn’t a sign you’ve lost your way; it’s a sign you’re fighting for a life that’s truly yours.

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what is a quarter life crisis
Image Credit: Midjourney

The quarter-life crisis is a well-defined set of stages—Trapped, Checking Out, Separation, Exploration, Rebuilding—one goes through in breaking free from feelings of meaninglessness, lack of fulfillment, and misalignment with purpose. I detail the stages and interweave my story below. (more…)

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Life

Here’s The Thing About Learning, Unlearning, and Relearning

Stop hoarding and start sharing your knowledge and wealth for the benefit of humankind

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sharing your knowledge
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Few people have the habit of hoarding their wealth without spending.  However, it limits their motivation as they tend to get into their comfort zones.  When people start spending money, then there will be depletion in their coffers. (more…)

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Life

3 Steps That’ll Help You Take Back Control of Your Life Immediately

The key to finding “enough” is recognizing that the root of the problem is a question of self-esteem and deservedness

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How to build self worth
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“It’s never enough.” (more…)

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