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9 Things You Seriously Need To Drop To Be Happy

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Things You Need to drop to be happy

Such a widely searched term nowadays is “How to be happy?”

We all want to be happy right? We fight for it. We live for it. We try to find it.

And that’s the problem: We’re chasing it.

It’s time to stop looking elsewhere and look within instead. As you reflect, you’d probably find a ton of things that you can let go of to be happy.

So here we will highlight 9 things you seriously need to drop to be happy.

 

 

Here are 9 things you seriously need to drop to be happy

 

1) Attachment to results

In other words, you need to stop having high expectations in whatever it is you do.  That’d be only serve to make you feel attached to a supposedly good result.

Let go of the attachment. Whatever happens, will happen. Accept it, learn from it, grow and keep enjoying the process.

 

2) Toxic friends

Sometimes, your lack of happiness could be due to your surroundings. Drop the toxic friends. They’re anchors weighing you down. Find positive friends instead. They’ll inspire you and lift you up all the time.

 

3) The chase for money

I get it. Money is important. We all have our responsibilities after all.

But what can I say except that the decision to chase money is always your choice.

Try to make this shift. You’d realize how deserving you are of money.

 

4) Finding love                                            

Don’t find love. Do what you love, and love will find you.

It’s not that cliché. If you try too hard to find somebody to be with, you end up coming across as needy. That’s not attractive. If you do what you love and enjoy it, you become attractive as you exude confidence and charisma.

 

5) Your clutter

This is kind of like the first point. You may be too attached to a lot of unnecessary things in your life.

Clean up your room and get rid of the clutter. A healthy environment produces a happy mind.

Let go of certain objects of value too, like your first car. You may be holding on too tight. Sometimes you’ve to liberate yourself to move forward.

 

6) Social media

You’re subconsciously boring yourself in the search of entertainment in social media. Unfortunately, most people don’t realize that it’s mindless and draining. Also, with mobile apps today, we’re not aware of our surroundings when we head out.

Drop it. Start being aware and appreciate nature. Find better hobbies too, like reading.

 

7) The past and future

Drop the past, for it does not exist anymore. Whatever happened during that time and whoever hurt you don’t matter anymore.

Drop the future for you cannot ever have full control of all events. Embrace uncertainty and let it all take care of itself.

 

8) Ideas of getting back at them

I know how it feels like to want to exact “revenge” or find ways to get back at other people when you’re wronged or hurt.

But you’ve got to drop it. It doesn’t do you any good at all. As they say, resentment is the poison you drink hoping someone else would die.

Focus on yourself and your life instead. Choose to be happy by doing what you love and becoming awesome.

 

9) Over reliance of happiness guides

I’m talking about blogs, courses, seminars, friends and family.

They can all help you, but they’re only dare to guide you. No one except you can choose to be happy.

Make the right choice. Then get out there and start taking action. You’re going to have to create your own experience and memories, things which you can truly call your own.

A truthful life is a happy one. Go for it.

 

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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