Life
5 Factors That Make Trust Possible Under Any Circumstance

Trust has a front door and a back door which is why many spend their whole life “trying” to trust other people yet, fail miserably. Trust comes up within work teams who are collaborating and building together. It appears in relationships that are blooming into longevity and meaning. It also shows up in the mirror, staring back at ourselves as we prepare for the day.
“Don’t trust them” are words we have heard recently as scandals, pandemics, and threats of economic downturn have disrupted our normal lives. There is a sense of distrust with media, celebrities, government, and even our own neighbor. This is front door trust. When the telltale wrap of front door trust comes knocking on our door, we answer it and then we decide if the thing, entity, or being on the other side is giving off vibes or information that we can trust.
What would happen if we knew of another door to focus on that very few know exists? What would happen if we used the back door to exit the house we’ve built around our own expectations and ideals? This prospect would require us to leave the house completely and trust ourselves.
This is where True Resolve Under Stress Thrives.
1. True
The truth about the world today is…We can fill in the blank with our perceptions. It is so easy to do by blocking people who have different opinions or say things we just don’t want to hear. We can handpick the songs we listen to and intentionally avoid all other genres; pushing out music that makes our ears hurt and our minds jumbled, hearing chords and lyrics that leave filled with anxiety. We can censor other distractions to prove ourselves right in order to preserve our ideas of what is good in the world.
“Self-trust is the first secret of success.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
2. Resolve
When we are resolved in who we are, we can be confident – in spite of the uncertainty that exists within the world. By focusing our resolve, we spend time on the things we know. The error many succumb to is when what we know – what we think we know is proven to be false. Only when we focus on our inner strengths, healing, gifts, and talents, are we fully ready for whatever comes next!
3. Under
The notion that we can be UNDER something is only available to us in our mind because at one time we were OVER that something. Under is simply a concept that exists because it balances the opposite end of the context, over. To understand fully, one end of the spectrum, we must also be able – and willing – to understand the other.
This is the concept of yin and yang. To secure Trust, we must understand that we control the context, and that we can shift our perception when we look at a situation from as many different viewpoints as possible. In this way, we gain a deeper understanding that resonates with who we are on the inside.
4. Stress
This part of Trust is a big one because being stressed and having stress have become a badge of honor in some communities and cultures. It is what separates us as successful or unsuccessful and it comes with a proud button worn for all to read, “Busy and Unavailable”. Stress is a factor that magnifies when we decide it can come and overtake us.
It usually starts as a thought which drives the hormones. We then feel something based on that thought which leads to the busyness behaviors. These behaviors produce more thoughts and then our bodies are flooded with more hormones and we exhibit more behaviors and the cycle goes on and on.
To get out of the stress cycle, we must first control our thoughts, more so in times of uncertainty, to avoid perceiving the world around us as negative, and untrusting. The concept of controlling a thought does not mean that you have the power to never have the thought in the first place. The importance here is placed on practicing ways of intervening and challenging your thoughts, as well as developing new thoughts and thought patterns.
5. Thrives
The last part of Trust rests in the outcome we all desire on some level or another, which is the ability to thrive in our life situations. We want to prosper, to flourish, and to have success that leads to fulfilment. This is only possible when trust is in place within us, shaping how we see the world. Without this inner trust, while we may thrive and succeed, we are, at the same time, constantly looking over our shoulder waiting for it to all come crashing down or be taken from us.
We do not have to live our lives without knowing true feeling and peace of trust. We can grasp it when we first look within and seek to understand the true essence of who we are and how firmly we stand when we perceive ourselves under attack, or in a situation that we thought we would be over by now. We reaffirm trust when we take hold of our thoughts and thrive in our current situation, which leaves room for us to have success, happiness, and joy in each moment of our lives.
No longer do we have to answer the front door when we hear the knock. We can walk out the back door, come around the side of the house, and see what is knocking from a brand new, unobstructed vantage point. That point exists within every single one of you.

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see? (more…)
Life
Failing is More Important Than Succeeding
Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

People often consider failure a stigma. Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life. (more…)
Life
5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.
Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.
Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.
Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.
However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.
Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:
1. Unconscious Sabotage
Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.
This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.
Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.
This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.
3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma
4. A strong need for control
5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained
What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?
There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:
- Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
- Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
- Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
- Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.
It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.
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