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4 Reasons Why People Fail To Succeed

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4 Reasons Why People Fail To Succeed

The constant inquiries of how one can make it into the world of success is never-ending.

This is due to the fact that, we as human beings, desire a life that is visually appealing to those on the outside looking in. This lustful on look of attention fills us with a sense of accomplishment.

Notice that I included that there is a need for most people to appeal to those on the outside looking in. This need to produce external improvement is what drives many people to seek the glory of success. Therefore, their sense of pride is based off of outside validation instead of internal happiness.

This speaks to the bigger issue at hand. People have no idea of what success really means within their life. When thinking and speaking of success, all thoughts are based off of opinion within mainstream society, rather than their own internal views. Such thinking sets many people up for failure who are seeking the path towards success dependent on thoughts of others, rather than their own.

Let me tell you 4 reasons why this occurs:

 

1. Not knowing yourself

You would be amazed to know how many people who are living in this world who have no real sense of self identity. Their identity and operating mindset within the world is programmed by outside societal influence. Therefore, they are a clone of a system with many other identical clones.

This leads to group think and no one can be successful who operates under the constrains of group think because they cannot perceive the world around them for themselves. Success is allergic to people who do not possess the ability to think for themselves; nor can form their own way of doing rather than being told what to do by others.

Their life is controlled by:

  • Media
  • Parents
  • Friends
  • Spouse
  • Government
  • Job

People allow these different entities to dictate how their life is structured, causing them to misinterpret what actually brings value to their existence within the world. The greatest danger to a person is not knowing who they actually are when no one else is around to tell them so.

Action steps:
  • Take a day or two of alone time to be by yourself, away from everything and everybody, to only be with yourself and your own thoughts
  • Perform a self analysis of yourself , identifying your strengths and weaknesses
  • List out your dreams and identify the fears you have which will make your dreams difficult to achieve
  • After this time of self evaluation, devise a plan that positions you as the leader of your own life, living life by your set of standards

Henry-David-Thoreau

2. Inability to recognize false images

People see the person driving the Mercedes Benz S550 and think success. What they do not see is that the person driving the Benz is in a panic because that car note is due, the mortgage is behind and other high priced expense are due; which have them drowning in debt.

People easily get aroused by visual stimulation, without knowing the truth behind the publicized facade of many who fake success. When your internal being is miserable, you are not successful. Real success produces the ability to think freely and do as you wish on your own terms.

False images blinds an easily influenced person’s ability to see what truly matters beyond public opinion. Therefore, they fill their life with junk that constricts their ability to live a life of freedom and success.

Action steps:
  • Learn to see life beyond material possessions and the need for outside validation. People and things are not constant, they change and disappear as time goes on
  • Live below your means until you can comfortably live well. This is accomplished when money can be utilized as a resourceful tool, rather than a desperate need
  • Develop your emotional intelligence skills. This skill helps  you gauge people beyond what they publicly display in order to see them for who they truly are

 

3. Unwillingness to pay dues

It is quite scary to realize how many people want the rewards of success without putting in the hard work to produce success. We live in a world of instant gratification, which means people feel they have a right to get what they want immediately. This can also be classified as unwarranted entitlement behavior.

People don’t understand that when climbing the ladder of success, they actually have to start at the bottom of the ladder and proceed upwards. There is no such thing as beginning one to two steps from the top.

Reaching the point of success means a series of actions were performed, that built upon one another to produce the desired results. This is not just done with a snap of a finger and a wishful dream of becoming successful. Real, consistent work is required on the path towards success.

Action steps:
  • Seek mentorship from those who have the success you want. Wise council of experience helps avoid costly mistakes produced from arrogance and ignorance
  • Never make excuses nor put off until “tomorrow”. Doing so only increases entitled behavior
  • Look beyond where you are today in favor of where you are positioning yourself to be tomorrow so you don’t become impatient and lose faith in yourself

“Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success.” – Pablo Picasso

4. No goals in which to measure success

Success is a planned destination and not a spurt of random thoughts and actions put together on the whim of sporadic thoughts. Success is produced when a person can envision the end game in mind and set out to develop the most effective actions which make it conceivable.

Without goals used to measure actions against and chart progression, a person operates without any real direction. It is imperative to know where one is currently, where they are going and how they are getting there.

Goals hold a person accountable to themselves and sets the standards for their ensuing actions. Goals create discipline and focus, which are key ingredients for success. No Goals = No Success

Action steps:
  • Set a clear vision of what you want for your life. Many people merely exist, you want to produce a desired lifestyle
  • Create goals which must be accomplished in order to stay working within your designated vision, leading to continued progression
  • Review your vision everyday and rate your daily actions in order to ensure they are consistent with making your vision attainable

 

People fail to succeed due to various issues but it all boils down to themselves being the culprit of their failure.

The one thing that is certain is that they really do not understand success nor its process. They hear the word and visualize what they believe it to be but they never truly internalize the meaning of success.

Thank you for reading my article! Please comment below!

Yura Bryant is the Founder of Entrepreneurial Ambitions. Entrepreneurial Ambitions started out as a blog, but now is being developed into a worldwide movement for individuals who seek economic freedom and a successful lifestyle produced from their own ambitious entrepreneurial pursuits.

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9 Comments

9 Comments

  1. Augustine Machino

    Jun 13, 2016 at 1:33 pm

    Great article. It speaks so much of the realities we are always shunning.

  2. Austine Nonso

    May 27, 2016 at 12:46 pm

    I sincerely believe this post is really inspiring; many people fail to become successful in life because they follow the wrong track. They never planned for their future, most people want to achieve quick success and fall into the hands of hungry fraudster who dupe them of their valuables. I believe success is a concentrated effort, determination, dedication, focus, hard working, and more importantly patience. When one has all this qualities, they is no way he or she will not succeed in life.

  3. Sumit

    Mar 19, 2016 at 2:10 pm

    Hi,

    I read this post and believe me you inspired me to the core, you give me a reason to dream again and make it achievable it’s true I’m unsuccessful struggling from many years but I’ve learned so much from bad time I didn’t know where to go what I wanted to do with my life and here in India at new Delhi I’ve tryed to work in hr executive profile but left ,I’ve tryed in BPO’s but failed but still finding where I’ve to go you know I used social media but I don’t what really is and how powerful it is and few years back I created my twitter account just to get a reply from johncena which he did replied to me but I did’t know what’s the use and slowly-slowly I found there are lot of brands who do marketing and run campaigns to promote there brands so I got to know digital marketing and it’s for those who love to be a social media freak which I’m now the problem I’m facing I don’t have money to pursue this course which I want to do badly but I’m trying to find a job so that I can learn this course to become a digital marketing professional and I also love IT sector so I’m trying to be successful ASAP and one last thing I find myself who I want to be ,what gives me happiness and thank you for the post.

    Regards
    Sumit

  4. Yura Bryant

    Aug 2, 2015 at 6:07 pm

    Nabin,

    We all go through life blinded by the influence others have over us, therefore forming our opinions and thoughts based off of others rather than first hand knowledge. Truth seeking for yourself can be uncomfortable because it causes you to challenge what you thought to be right, to see what it actually is in reality.

  5. Yura Bryant

    Aug 2, 2015 at 6:01 pm

    Exactly Lawrence,
    Mastering yourself is the ultimate challenge in life. Since birth we are controlled by outside factors: parents, school, friends, media; and we never truly learn to think for ourselves without outside influence. Knowing yourself means having the ability to cut away from everybody and everything else, to see the world from truly your own perspective. That means gaining experiences on your own, which translate into you forming your own opinions and actions based upon what you come to know for yourself.

  6. nabin

    Aug 2, 2015 at 3:05 am

    I relate it with myself. Really written with deep thought over the matter

  7. Lawrence Berry

    Aug 1, 2015 at 7:09 pm

    People fail to succeed more in their life because, like you said, they don’t know who they are and because they don’t know who they are, they don’t know what they want. They let external factors and other people expectations influence their decisions, getting into a career field or something they are not passionate. They may have slight success, but they will never be as successful as they could be until they find out who they really are. Finding out who you are takes time. You really have to be in tune with yourself and your emotions in different situations.

  8. Yura Bryant

    Jul 31, 2015 at 6:36 pm

    I appreciate the comment Successful Tribe.
    Unfortunately many people do not realize they lack success due to the fact that they are a barrier against welcoming it’s presence.

  9. Successful Tribe

    Jul 30, 2015 at 9:19 pm

    Great article.
    I agree…

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Life

8 Things You Can Do to Rise Above Failure and Attain Success

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Highly successful people have tasted failure more than success. Whether its Nikola Tesla or Michael Jordan, everyone had his/her fair share of failures before rising to the pinnacle of success. Yet, most people I know are averse to the idea of failure.

When ambition fuels your desires, you become so conscious about avoiding failure that you forget to learn how to cope with it when you actually experience it. So, when you come face-to-face with adversity, it often overwhelms you.

This brings us to the question, how can you train yourself to overcome these difficulties and use them to your advantage? Here’s how:

1. Acceptance is important to overcome failure

When the going gets tough, one of the most frustrating things you may get to hear is “stay positive.” The idea of positive thinking has been misconstrued, misused, and abused continuously. Contrary to popular belief, positive thinking has nothing to do with smiling and being happy with everything that happens to you all the time. Anyone who preaches that is either lying or crazy.

Use positive thinking to learn, grow, and evolve from the experiences we gather in life. Positive thinking simply means that if you are faced with a setback, you work hard to overcome the challenges. When you experience hardships, it is alright to feel upset and disappointed. Our objective, however, is not to stay down.

2. Be honest with yourself

The most crucial part of dealing with a failure involves pausing for a couple of minutes and pondering over what happened. You need to be completely honest with yourself on why it happened.

It is easy to pull out the Smartphone, turn on the laptop or find other forms of distraction. Most people would do anything to distract themselves and keep their eyes shut to the mistakes they have made.

However, if you don’t confront, you don’t learn. And if you don’t learn, then you are setting yourself up for failure again. Albert Einstein famously stated that it was insane to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different outcome. If you don’t derive a lesson out of mistakes and failures in life, then you are doomed to keep repeating them, whether you realise it or not.

“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” – Henry Ford

3. Don’t beat yourself up over a temporary setback

When you have experienced a setback, many of you may succumb to the feeling that you’ll always keep failing. It is easy to convince yourself that you are indeed a failure. Don’t let such destructive ideas or thoughts creep into your head. Instead, keep reminding yourself that just because you failed today, it doesn’t mean you’d fail the next time as well.

It is also important that you treat your failure as a passing phase. When you keep moving forward, focus on the right things, and keep learning. Perceiving the setback as a temporary phase rather than something permanent is vital to developing an optimistic attitude in life.

4. Focus on nurturing and improving yourself

Failures don’t discriminate, and it comes to everyone at some point. The trick lies in learning to deal with it and what you do about it that makes all the difference. In many cases, failure happens because a person wasn’t prepared, didn’t invest time on planning or was ill-equipped. It can also be because Lady Luck decided not to shower her favours.

Except for the last one, the rest of the issues can be fixed. Prepare a list of all the things that you think resulted in your failure. Start working on them one at a time. Do everything in your capacity to rectify, improve, resolve, and develop.

5. Find inspiration and support in abundance

Interacting with someone close can be more helpful than you think. You can also learn from people who have been through similar situations and have achieved what you hope to. Gain insights on how they managed to sail through the setbacks or low-points before and during the moment of success.

Or you can gain the motivation or enthusiasm by listening to someone else from an audiobook or podcast for maybe 30-60 minutes. It doesn’t have to be focused on your current setbacks.  Change your mood and mindset back towards optimism again.

6. Adopt a constructive approach and learn from the adverse situation

Consider it as valuable feedback and take home something you can implement in the process of overcoming your failure. The following are some of the questions you need to ask yourself:

  • What is the lesson for me?
  • How can I rectify myself to avoid making the same mistake and do better next time?
  • What can I do to enjoy guaranteed success?

You don’t need to rush through the process. Some of the answers may be immediate, while others might take an hour, a day or even a week to pop up. The significant thing is to start thinking about the situation from this perspective. Also, you need to be constructive about things rather than getting stuck with denial, negativity and apathy.

7. Stop mulling over and move on

Processing the situation and accepting it is the ideal way to deal with failures. Any individual who has experienced failures will know that it is quite easy to stay stuck in the loop of similar thoughts. In fact, this may go around and around for weeks or even months.

Now, in order to be free from this trap, the one habit that might help you is the set of questions like the ones shared above. You can also create a rough plan for how you wish to move forward from here. So, take some time to sit down and write them down.

“Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

8. Purge out all the negativity

Another impactful way to handle the emotional meltdown and the thoughts that emerge from experiencing failure is to purge out all the negativity. In order to let everything out, you need to confide in someone close to you. There are two ways to go about it: Engaging in a conversation with someone will allow you to see it from a different perspective. The person you talk to can assist you in grounding yourself in reality again and motivate you to look for a way forward.

Or you can simply vent about it while the other person who is listening can sort things out for you. He/she can help you accept what happened and boost your spirit by instilling a sense of hope.

The significant thing to remember is that while you can’t stop obstacles from appearing in life, you can devise smart ways to handle them. If you persevere, you can easily discover opportunities that have been waiting for you on the other side. Now, as you become more efficient at dealing with the failures, you will allow yourself to see the positive side in even the toughest of scenarios.

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Life

How Stress Can Actually Improve the Quality of Your Life

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Naturally, those of us who experience less stress in our lives are more likely to succeed. So, it’s important that you learn how to reduce your daily level of stress, right? Maybe not. Recent research has shown the common wisdom about stress might be dangerously inaccurate. Psychologists tracked the health of 30,000 adults in the United States over an 8-year period. Participants were asked two important questions:

1.    “How much stress have you experienced in the last year?”
2.    “Do you believe stress is harmful to your health?” (more…)

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Life

The Truth About the Law of Attraction

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When we want something, we generally imagine the form it will take when it manifests. If we’re not careful, however, we can find ourselves attached more to the imagined form than the actual desired outcome. This is like placing an online order and expecting it to come in a blue box shipped by UPS. If we then receive a red box delivered by FedEx, we might not realize that it’s what we ordered, and never even open it!

For example, most of us say that we want money, but when money comes in the form of a free coffee or a gift or a discount, we don’t see it for what it is. We overlook it, and maybe we even say “No, thanks” and decline the gift which is, in one way or another, still money. In doing so, we fail to appreciate the value of the discount, the gift, or the freebie. If it isn’t cash being handed to us, we don’t see it as a manifestation of our desire.

The law of attraction is a funny thing.

It is much more complex and much more intricate than what it seems to be and yet, at the same time, it’s so very simple: We always get what we want. We always receive more of the energy at which we vibrate. Always.

However, if we’re acting from the energy of “I don’t deserve it” or “I don’t think I’m worthy,” then whatever it is that we receive will be negated and essentially unseen. On the other hand, if we are open, observant, and maintaining an abundance mindset, we will receive our request on numerous levels and from plentiful sources!

“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” – Napoleon Hill

This is because we “place our order” not only through our words, but through our actions, our beliefs, and our thoughts.

Last month, I was open to receiving a new client. I didn’t know how it would happen, but I’d set my intention: I was going to get a new client. That night, out of nowhere, I got a message from an old student of mine. She was looking to hire me again as her coach for the upcoming college entrance exams in the U.S. But wait! I didn’t want an entrance exam client.

What I actually wanted was to get life and business coaching clients. This student was my “red box from Fed Ex.” I wanted to decline at first, but as I was about to reply, something made me stop. I asked myself, “Why am I rejecting this?”

This student is an amazing client. She pays on time. She’s not needy. She does her part. Best of all? She doesn’t short-change me. So I said yes, because I realized that the Universe was simply responding to the essence of my desire.

You see, my “Big Why” in everything I do has always been to facilitate an accelerated personal and business growth for my clients, and this student fit the bill in every way. She wanted the personal growth, she was ready to go all in and she reached out to me.

It didn’t look like the package I was expecting so I didn’t recognize it at first—and I nearly turned it away—but she was the perfect answer to my request.

Serving people like her has always been a driving force in my life.

The Universe knows that. It also knew that I wanted a client asap so that I could re-invest the money into my business, so it responded in the most ideal way… but in an unexpected form. And I came so close to missing it!

How many times have I missed other opportunities like this? How many times have I dismissed a “red box” because it wasn’t “blue?” I’ll never know. But I do know that, had I not stopped myself from sending a “No, thanks,” I would have felt as though the Universe wasn’t listening.

That’s the thing: the Universe is always listening.

The more open we are in receiving, the more we thrive. The more open our energy is, the greater the possibilities. Don’t just return that red box to the post office and keep waiting on a blue one. Ask yourself, first and foremost, if what you’re receiving at the moment matches up with your underlying desire.

See yourself living in abundance and you will attract it.” – Rhonda Byrne

The key is to be willing to receive anything and everything. How? Keep on reading1

1. Get clear on your “underlying desire.”

Identify exactly what it is that you really want—in my case, it was an ideal client (underlying) as opposed to a coaching client (surface)—and focus on that. Clear out all the mental noise and static that clouds your awareness.

2. Be flexible

Keep your eyes and mind open for anything that fits the description. When you ask for money, recognize that free coffee for what it is: $3 you were going to spend anyway, that can now remain in your pocket. Every penny on the ground, every coupon, it’s all money.

3. Keep an attitude of gratitude.

The more you appreciate what you have, the more that comes your way. Your grateful mindset opens the energetic door for more to flow your way, because “where attention goes, energy flows.” The more you focus on the things you want, the more you will draw them into your experience.

Remember, that the Universe responds to our requests in whatever way fits best within the big picture.

It’s a picture so big that we couldn’t possibly begin to see how it comes together. Trust it. Know that when you ask, you will receive. It may not come in the form you anticipate, but always in a form that responds to your underlying desire. You just have to be ready to see it.

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Life

7 Simple Ways to Master Your Emotions When Making Decisions

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A lot of people have big regrets when lying on their deathbed. These regrets are often related to bad decisions or decisions not taken. Thus, as it turns out, decision-making is dependent on great self-confidence. A person who has confidence in their decisions has an easier time making them.

Emotions also play a big role in all of this. This is a debate that has confronted two great thinkers. According to Descartes, “decisions are the product of the rational mind.” In other words, decision-making is essentially based on facts and mathematics.

But this thesis was refuted and proven to be wrong by Antonio Damasio in one of his works called “The Error of Descartes”. This was partly based on the story of Elliott, a kid that was very smart, who had above average rational capabilities, but incapable of making a decision, after a surgery to remove a brain tumor on the surface of his frontal lobes. After all his work in that matter, he concludes that a person who is incapable of emotion is incapable of making the most rational decisions.

The management of emotions is therefore completely inherent to good decision making, especially when making the most important decisions. To this end, here are 7 tips to put into practice to really master your emotions thus making the best decisions possible and never regreting them.

1. Take a step back

You must learn to take the time to identify and understand your emotions. Since physical reactions are emotionally related, also take the time to detect the reactions you have to some of your emotions. To be able to take the distance necessary to make decisions, it’s important to refer to your prefrontal cortex. This is the area of ​​the brain responsible for reasoning. To do so you need to put yourself in a stress-free environment for a few minutes.

“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent and committed decision.” – Tony Robbins

2. Breathe

The best way to do this is to learn to breathe deeply. This will allow activating your prefrontal cortex again, therefore, to have better control of your emotions so you do not react to them, let alone to the event that causes these emotions. Do this exercise for at least 15 minutes. It’s amazing how you can train yourself never to react, no matter what the situation. Ideally, let at least 24 hours go by before responding to a situation that would normally cause tension.

3. Pay attention

Once you are in the prefrontal cortex, put one hand on your abdomen, at the level of your intestines, and the other hand on your heart, and take the time to listen. These two parts of the body are the two major centers of vibrations and emotions. This is why it’s important to listen and pay attention to them.

The purpose of this exercise is to become aware of your gut and heart. What you need to remember is that the only person you need to trust is yourself. By practicing this exercise, one thing will become very clear: what the emotion you feel seeks to convey to you about the decision you have to make.

Since everything is energy, first make sure that the vibration of the decision you are about to make and that of your heart and gut are in sync. You will then know whether to go ahead with your decision or reject it based on whether you feel serenity or heaviness.

4. Discern untruths

It is important to know whether your nervousness is the result of an untruth you’ve told yourself. These can corrupt the vibrations that should help you make the right decision. You have to throw out all of these untruths and come to the decision-making without any filter. Stop thinking that you’re unlucky, that you’re in a bad situation, that your life is a failure, or that you are a victim.

5. Become aware of your emotions instead of avoiding them

To become aware of your emotions, you must learn to coach yourself. Ask yourself questions: How did you feel the last time you had to ask these types of questions? What did you get in return? Rename what you felt and the result you obtained from what you decided to do. You will thus be much better at assimilating, understanding, and welcoming your emotions.

6. Be as present as possible

There is no point in focusing on the big events surrounding the decision you want to make. Concentrate instead on the present moment, without analyzing the events. Judge based on emotions rather than the event. By being more present, you will be better able to listen to your emotions and feel them.

Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.” – John C. Maxwell

7. Make your emotions your allies

Each of your emotions speaks to you through the physical and physiological reactions that they generate in you. Look to the weight of their impact on you as an indicator. Only by listening to them, using them, and managing them can you manage your emotions.

Habit comes with practice. With time, these 7 points will become much more natural and will become automatic. You will make better decisions for yourself.  This is one of the best ways to not end up with one of the big regrets.

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