Life
4 Reasons Why People Fail To Succeed

The constant inquiries of how one can make it into the world of success is never-ending.
This is due to the fact that, we as human beings, desire a life that is visually appealing to those on the outside looking in. This lustful on look of attention fills us with a sense of accomplishment.
Notice that I included that there is a need for most people to appeal to those on the outside looking in. This need to produce external improvement is what drives many people to seek the glory of success. Therefore, their sense of pride is based off of outside validation instead of internal happiness.
This speaks to the bigger issue at hand. People have no idea of what success really means within their life. When thinking and speaking of success, all thoughts are based off of opinion within mainstream society, rather than their own internal views. Such thinking sets many people up for failure who are seeking the path towards success dependent on thoughts of others, rather than their own.
Let me tell you 4 reasons why this occurs:
1. Not knowing yourself
You would be amazed to know how many people who are living in this world who have no real sense of self identity. Their identity and operating mindset within the world is programmed by outside societal influence. Therefore, they are a clone of a system with many other identical clones.
This leads to group think and no one can be successful who operates under the constrains of group think because they cannot perceive the world around them for themselves. Success is allergic to people who do not possess the ability to think for themselves; nor can form their own way of doing rather than being told what to do by others.
Their life is controlled by:
- Media
- Parents
- Friends
- Spouse
- Government
- Job
People allow these different entities to dictate how their life is structured, causing them to misinterpret what actually brings value to their existence within the world. The greatest danger to a person is not knowing who they actually are when no one else is around to tell them so.
Action steps:
- Take a day or two of alone time to be by yourself, away from everything and everybody, to only be with yourself and your own thoughts
- Perform a self analysis of yourself , identifying your strengths and weaknesses
- List out your dreams and identify the fears you have which will make your dreams difficult to achieve
- After this time of self evaluation, devise a plan that positions you as the leader of your own life, living life by your set of standards

2. Inability to recognize false images
People see the person driving the Mercedes Benz S550 and think success. What they do not see is that the person driving the Benz is in a panic because that car note is due, the mortgage is behind and other high priced expense are due; which have them drowning in debt.
People easily get aroused by visual stimulation, without knowing the truth behind the publicized facade of many who fake success. When your internal being is miserable, you are not successful. Real success produces the ability to think freely and do as you wish on your own terms.
False images blinds an easily influenced person’s ability to see what truly matters beyond public opinion. Therefore, they fill their life with junk that constricts their ability to live a life of freedom and success.
Action steps:
- Learn to see life beyond material possessions and the need for outside validation. People and things are not constant, they change and disappear as time goes on
- Live below your means until you can comfortably live well. This is accomplished when money can be utilized as a resourceful tool, rather than a desperate need
- Develop your emotional intelligence skills. This skill helps you gauge people beyond what they publicly display in order to see them for who they truly are
3. Unwillingness to pay dues
It is quite scary to realize how many people want the rewards of success without putting in the hard work to produce success. We live in a world of instant gratification, which means people feel they have a right to get what they want immediately. This can also be classified as unwarranted entitlement behavior.
People don’t understand that when climbing the ladder of success, they actually have to start at the bottom of the ladder and proceed upwards. There is no such thing as beginning one to two steps from the top.
Reaching the point of success means a series of actions were performed, that built upon one another to produce the desired results. This is not just done with a snap of a finger and a wishful dream of becoming successful. Real, consistent work is required on the path towards success.
Action steps:
- Seek mentorship from those who have the success you want. Wise council of experience helps avoid costly mistakes produced from arrogance and ignorance
- Never make excuses nor put off until “tomorrow”. Doing so only increases entitled behavior
- Look beyond where you are today in favor of where you are positioning yourself to be tomorrow so you don’t become impatient and lose faith in yourself
“Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must fervently believe, and upon which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success.” – Pablo Picasso
4. No goals in which to measure success
Success is a planned destination and not a spurt of random thoughts and actions put together on the whim of sporadic thoughts. Success is produced when a person can envision the end game in mind and set out to develop the most effective actions which make it conceivable.
Without goals used to measure actions against and chart progression, a person operates without any real direction. It is imperative to know where one is currently, where they are going and how they are getting there.
Goals hold a person accountable to themselves and sets the standards for their ensuing actions. Goals create discipline and focus, which are key ingredients for success. No Goals = No Success
Action steps:
- Set a clear vision of what you want for your life. Many people merely exist, you want to produce a desired lifestyle
- Create goals which must be accomplished in order to stay working within your designated vision, leading to continued progression
- Review your vision everyday and rate your daily actions in order to ensure they are consistent with making your vision attainable
People fail to succeed due to various issues but it all boils down to themselves being the culprit of their failure.
The one thing that is certain is that they really do not understand success nor its process. They hear the word and visualize what they believe it to be but they never truly internalize the meaning of success.
Thank you for reading my article! Please comment below!
Life
The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance
Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see? (more…)
Life
Failing is More Important Than Succeeding
Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

People often consider failure a stigma. Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life. (more…)
Life
5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.
Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.
Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.
Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.
However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.
Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:
1. Unconscious Sabotage
Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.
This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.
Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.
This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.
3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma
4. A strong need for control
5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained
What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?
There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:
- Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
- Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
- Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
- Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.
It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.
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