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4 Essentials to Keep You From Staying Satisfied in Life

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satisfaction

It may sound morally objectionable to not want to stay satisfied in life; however, truth be told, it is actually unethical and morally wrong to not pursue what you really want in life and realize your maximum potential.

The people around us in life, whether it’s family, friends, business associates, people under our leadership, or people in our communities, look at our lives and are impacted. They see how we live out our dreams, and how we overcome the obstacles of life and business. This inspires them to do more, better, or different in their own lives. The reality is, many people’s inspiration and reason to excel is resting on us.

With this great responsibility on our shoulders, that is the first reason we must always strive for more and never be satisfied: someone’s success is depending on your success.

In the tough times or even the times we have reaped the harvest of our hard work, always know we must keep going. Yes, savor the victory, but know that this is not the end. We must keep going. If you don’t do it for you at least think of the people that are watching you and observing your life and do it for them.

Here are some practical tips on how to be continually motivated and not easily satisfied with our successes:

1. Frequently Self-Reflect

Socrates famously stated that an unexamined life is not worth living. We should ask ourselves if THIS (certain point in our lives) is our best that we have to offer. If we are being honest with ourselves, we will truthfully answer, NO. Nonetheless, we must not beat ourselves up nor constantly criticize ourselves but always remind ourselves that there is always room for growth.

Life is all about growth and development, and the goal of all development is to realize our true potential. All organisms grow and when they stop growing, you can be pretty sure that their stage for destruction has set in. Humans are probably the only creatures that do not stop growing. While we have stopped growing physically, our other aspects such as psychology, social standing, ambitions and other areas do not stop growing at all.

“The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.” – Wayne Dyer

2. Explore The World

You’ve probably heard of people who’ve stayed their entire lives in their birthplace. These types of people sometimes cannot believe the stories they hear from others that have travelled or lived in various places.

To truly see other people and parts of the world, other than where you come from is a must. Not only does it allow one to appreciate what you do have, but it challenges you to want to do more with your life and not settle. Some of the biggest moments of growth for many people happen when they attend missionary trips, participate in community service, business conferences, and even vacationing in other cities or even countries.

This occurs because your everyday existence and routine of life is challenged. You meet other people who may not be where you are in life or are doing exceptionally more than you. Either way, the first can remind you to always be hungry, and the other can remind you that you are not there yet and there is still more to success and growth; we still have room to grow.

So, travel, meet new people, and stretch your understanding of what life looks like and  what is attainable.

3. Be Curious

Most have heard the old saying when you were young, that “curiosity killed the cat.” Take that saying as a caution not a rule. We should be like children in the level of our curiosity. Curious children ask a lot of questions, and sometimes some of these questions even surprise adults. Because of their powerful curiosity, children think differently compared to adults and therein lies the power of having curiosity as a child.

Some very smart children are not satisfied with some answers adults give them at times, because they intuitively know that either the adult didn’t know the answer or they didn’t understand the topic at all. Don’t be satisfied, and always be eternally curious. Research topics that you know little to nothing about, and be open-minded to topics you are familiar with.

4. Be A Perfectionist

Don’t be satisfied with the present way of doing things. Progress would not happen if we did not tinker with doing things better. Consider textile weaving. People of long ago made textile for clothes using traditional weaving. If we had been satisfied with this way of making textile, we would not have discovered modern technologies of spinning and weaving to produce textiles to clothe billions of people across the world.

So never adopt a mindset that anything is ever perfect with no room for improvement. Systems and processes can always be improved.  

It is hard to work with a perfectionist, but without the perfectionist, we would not have the comfort of modern life. Machines are designed for perfection. An imperfect machine would not work, and even if it could be made to work, it would be hazardous to operate. Perfectionists are not satisfied with mediocre output. They always want the best.

“Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen.” – Michael Jordan

A study published in the “Journal of Personality” entitled “On the Development of Perfectionism: The Longitudinal Role of Academic Achievement and Academic Efficacy,” by Lavinia E. Damian and colleagues showed that academic achievement predicted relative increases in both perfectionistic strivings and perfectionistic concerns. This is an important development because it suggests that as people become better and better, their level of perfectionistic pursuit also increases.

Never succumb to the mindset of people who achieve some level of success and say “I have arrived” and “I have made it.” For when we accept this, we have placed a ceiling over our potential and a limit on the truly limitless opportunities that await us. Always strive to be, do, achieve, reach, see, and grow more.

How are you making sure you continue to grow daily in order to be great? Share with us some tips in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Richard Trevino II is a consultant, speaker, best selling author, and writer for all things personal development. He is also a father and a husband of 12 years that devotes much of his time to helping others, whether successful business people or homeless, struggling addicts to find their inner strengths and utilize those strengths to change their lives. His mission is to help people become a better version of themselves today, to forever change their tomorrow. You can find him on Facebook or www.richardtrevino2.com.

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Life

The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

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Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

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How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

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It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

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Life

Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

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People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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