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10 Steps to Creating the Life You Actually Want

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Create a great life
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Too many people are living in circumstances that they are not happy with. They do not know that they can actually have the life they want. Some have not even taken any time to think about what it is that they actually want. Having an idea of the life you want means you can create your reality and live a life that makes you happy.

Follow these 10 steps below to walk towards living the life that you want:

1. Ask yourself what you want in all aspects of life

If you do not know what you are looking for in each area of your life you will wake up one day and wonder why you didn’t get what you wanted out of life. Before you can really be happy and get what you want from this life, you must ask yourself what you really want.

Many people believe that it is impossible to have their dream life, but it is possible. You just have to decide what you want first. Take the time to sit down and write this out. What do you want your life to look like? Visualise it. Visualise your ideal world and get it down on paper.

2. Get clear on your goals

Once you know what you want in all areas of your life then you need to get specific and clear about your goals. Take those ideal visions and get specific about when you want to achieve, when you want to achieve it by and how you will know you have achieved it.

“Set your goals high and don’t stop till you get there.” – Bo Jackson

3. Make a plan & take action

This is where many people get stuck and never actualise their visions and their goals. Once you have figured out what you want you need to create a path to get there and actually do the work. This can be tricky for people because this is where it can get hard but taking massive action separates those who will make changes and live the life that they dream of and those who will just always be dreaming and wishing forever.

4. Don’t settle

When creating the life that you want it is easy to get a life that you do not want and it can be difficult to work on yourself and your goals to ensure you get the life that you want. When it gets hard many people end up settling for what they have and push themselves for what they want. Don’t be someone who has settled for second best. Remember that this is your life and you can have whatever you want from this life as long as you work and don’t settle.

5. Stay focused

Creating the life you want requires you to stick to your goals. It is easy to get side tracked with so many distractions in this world. Social media, nights out drinking, spending money on meaningless items to keep up with the jones’.

We spend so much time tending to the needs of others through emails, social media, adverts constantly asking you to buy products and family or friends organising big boozy nights out. If you can take back your agenda and focus on the things that you want to do rather than answer to the needs of others, you will be on track to reach your goal.

6. Remember you deserve it

Sometimes people get scared and worry that they are not good enough or that it is only other people that achieve their dreams and goals. You need to remember that you were put on this earth and you have the skills and abilities that are unique to you. Nobody can do anything the way you do it, because you are unique. Be yourself and remember you are worth it.

7. Work hard

Goals don’t work unless you do. Having the life that you want will not happen overnight and it certainly won’t happen if you do not put the work into it. So many people set goals, make a plan and then expect things to change and improve but the reality is it takes time, work and effort to make the changes towards living the life of your dreams. So start today.

8. Stay positive

It can be difficult to stay in a positive mindset when things get hard or setbacks occur, but cultivating a happy outlook can be the difference in staying on track towards your goal and never reaching it.

“Positive better is nothing than negative nothing.” – Elbert Hubbard

9. Take time alone

We all love our family and friends, however, when you are pursuing a goal it is important that you take time to be by yourself. This will give you the opportunity to reflect on your life, what is going well, what part of the plan needs to be adapted or just to relax by meditating or reading.

I find taking time alone to be the most important part in reaching any goal, and have even found a name for it, ‘touching base’. The reason it is so important is because it gives me the chance to reconnect with myself, reconnect with what I want and ask myself if I am on the right path. It is difficult to do that when surrounded by people all the time.

10. Learn and adapt

The road to achieving your goals will not be a smooth road, but if it was easy then everyone would be doing it. During the process of working towards your goals you will experience failure and setbacks but this is where the growth and development happens. Your growth and development is necessary for you to achieve your goals so you must keep moving moving forward.

Finally, a person living the life that they want is no accident. They went out and actually created it using these 10 steps. Get started NOW and create the life you want.

Are you living the life you want? What are you doing to make sure you are? Leave your thoughts below!

Lorna Harkins is a personal & professional coach, using coaching to help clients overcome obstacle, cultivate a mindset for success and achieve their goals. It is her mission to ensure that everyone knows that they have the ability to be the hero, to have what they want, and then to empower them to take action to make their life and existence one of meaning, fulfilment and success. If you liked this article follow her on twitter @_bafr.

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6 Comments

6 Comments

  1. Lorna Harkins

    Jan 30, 2017 at 9:33 am

    Glad you agree Rodrigo 🙂

    Good luck JuneBug ! Let me know how you get on

  2. Lorna Harkins

    Jan 30, 2017 at 9:31 am

    Thanks for your comment Olga ! Goodluck with your goal of learning French 🙂

  3. JuneBug

    Jan 30, 2017 at 1:25 am

    Ok here I go.

  4. Rodrigo

    Jan 29, 2017 at 8:03 pm

    Totally agree!

  5. Olga

    Jan 29, 2017 at 4:47 pm

    My goal for this year is to learn the French language. It doesn’t always come easy to learn this language, though, I discovered so much about myself during this 1,5 years! I would’ve never figured anything out if I was still living at home.

  6. chhaayahn

    Jan 29, 2017 at 3:05 pm

    Its very simple yet powerful. As you said i tried to visualize the things i want in my life in paper. Suprisingly i felt motivated. By Writing in paper i felt responsible of my own life. I truly want my life to be how i visualized today. I need to work out as per your simple suggestion. Thank you.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

Change Your Life Forever With These 30 Strategies

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change your life

There are strategies which bring together all happy and successful people who can also use them to improve the quality of your life. Usually when you want to change your life, you don’t know where to start and you risk losing the motivation because you don’t know the best strategies to apply. To change your life forever you have to change yourself. If you want to achieve extraordinary results, you must become an extraordinary person.

Here are 30 ways you can change your life today:

1. Face your fears, first the smallest, then the greatest.

2. Transform gratitude into a daily and constant mood. This will allow you to change your life.

3. Be conscious in every moment of what you think, feel, desire and do. Be Present. Do the exercises of “Remembering yourself” all year round.

4. Engage in realizing your dreams, creating a monthly plan with daily actions to accomplish them.

5. Decide what person you want to become, create a purpose that will guide your life and your days.

6. Practice observing thoughts, without identifying yourself with them.

7. Make your power supply healthier.

8. Read more books and take part in several courses and seminars.

9. Always out of the ordinary, do not imitate the mass.

10. Make gentle gestures to people you don’t know.

11. Imagine yourself while you have realized your dreams.

12. Take more time to be alone and get to know you better.

13. Live with the awareness that nothing is yours, everything is a gift.

14. Stop complaining; stop complaining; stop complaining.

15. Help others with the example.

16. Smile and laugh more often, even without reason.

17. Stay for a longer time in contact with nature.

18. Think, talk and act as the person you want to become.

19. Be punctual and if you make a mistake, please apologize.

20. Say thank you for each gift, learn to receive.

21. Change a habit or recurring reaction.

22. Take responsibility for the successes and failures you achieve, never point your finger at someone else.

23. Admire and bless more often.

24. Strive to perceive perfection and beauty in everything that happens to you.

25. Inwardly love your enemies, even if you don’t talk to them externally.

26. Learn a musical instrument or a new language.

27. Keep promises made.

28. During a difficult period ask yourself “What can I learn from this situation”?

29. Do more often what is right and less what is convenient for you.

30. Change your way of thinking.

If you want to change your life forever, you must act as if you were already the person you want to become. Take action as if you were already sure of yourself, and see what beliefs are held by successful people, great leaders, the best in your industry and those who get great results.

Listening to them, spend time with them, try to understand what they think, how they see each other, and what they think about their activity. Read the books of those who get the same results that you want to achieve, listen to their interviews, read their autobiographies, and find out what their mental attitude is.

All successful people have similar beliefs

I’ll tell you a secret: There is no greater psychological strength than the need we have to remain consistent with our own identity; to remain consistent with who we believe we are. What does that mean? Simple, that everything that anything I put after the words “I am:…” becomes reality.

If you think you are shy, you will do everything you can to act accordingly. If you believe you are extroverted, you will give everything to act accordingly. Listen and pay attention to what you add after the words “I am…”. If you don’t believe you can achieve your goals beyond the objective difficulties, you won’t be able to do it anyway: you will be the first cause of your failure.

Which one of these 30 strategies will you implement in your life today? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Continue Reading

Life

Lost Your Mojo? Focus on These 3 Areas to Get Back in the Game

Published

on

get back in the game

It’s time for some good news! You’re only ever lacking in three areas and guess what? You can turn those 3 things around relatively easily and quickly!

It’s easy to get caught up thinking, that you’re miles behind, that you can’t find your flow or mojo or that you’re just lazy and unmotivated. The good news is you are only a few decisions, actions and days away from finding your mojo again!

Here are 3 things you need to look at when you’re feeling down and out:

1. Energy levels

The first place to look when you lose your mojo is your energy levels. What are you eating & drinking? Are you eating lean, green and light? If you aren’t already, cut your intake down and focus on hydrating your body with water and eating fresh organic food. Being light on your feet and energizing your body is most important.

Also, take a look at your exercise regime. Are you exercising for energy or are you burning your body out at the gym? Make sure you are getting good consistent rest every night and don’t forget to spend some time alone in nature connecting with your inner most self.

“You just got to wake up with a smile and love every minute of building your dream.” – Joe Duncan

2. Production levels

The second place to look is your production levels or more so, your lack of production! Are you producing enough work or activity to get the results you want? That’s usually the real cause of most of your problems; a lack of work, effort and momentum. In many cases a lack of production stems from a lack of energy – but hey, we’re working on that right?

3. Confidence levels

The third place to look when you’re floundering is your confidence levels. But don’t panic, we all lose our confidence from time to time. When you lose your confidence and your sense of certainty, everything else will be impacted, especially your performance.

The best way to get your confidence back is to go back to basics for a few days and try and build some momentum and get your flow back. You lose your confidence when you lose your self belief, so do the simple things you know you can do well, then you’ll start to believe in your ability again!

“You won’t always get it right, but that doesn’t mean you’re never going to get it right.” – Joe Duncan

It’s time to get your mojo back and get back in the game. Remember next time when you get stuck you only have to make adjustments in these three areas and most likely they will only be small tweaks and changes that need to be implemented. 

Click here if you are having trouble finding your flow, lost motivation and need some help to get back on your feet!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Continue Reading

Life

How Never Giving Up Can Lead You From Pain and Suffering to Ease and Joy

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never give up

I struggled with many aspects of life early on such as growing up in challenging circumstances and getting bullied at school. I read my first self-development book at 13 and attended many courses and workshops, but nothing I encountered made the difference for me. It was only once I found a set of energetic processes and tools which I now use in my life and my work that I was able to turn things around.

Today, I get to write for you about my experiences, run a thriving mentoring and healing practice and travel to attend classes and events.

Here are some of the things I’ve done/learned along the way:

1. I took responsibility for my actions

I believe we attract all our experiences in order to learn from them. It is tough when we go through things we don’t know how to handle and experience pain, fear and anxiety as a result.  

This leaves us many emotions to release and a skill gap to bridge, which if done right, allows us to develop a level of confidence about how to turn experience into awareness and integrate our learning into wisdom for future ease and higher outcomes.

For me, learning to let go was hard (we are not taught this and I kept feeling like I had to hold onto things to protect myself). After a while, I came to the decision that “It’s not what’s happened to me, it’s how I deal with it that matters”.

Choosing from this space was empowering and allowed me to move from regret and develop a sense of purpose from my experiences.

2. I jumped off the cliff without a parachute and became inspired and trusting on the way down

I had gotten to the point where if I stayed where I was, I would die. I didn’t know how my life would look or who I would become in the process of changing, yet I knew if I was going to survive I had to become a radically different version of me.

Once I made that decision, I found the tools I was looking for that were relatable, fun and powerful. I began to change my thoughts, feelings and emotions and way of viewing the world.

After a while, instead of using personal development to escape the pain of my life, I became addicted to pursuing the highest version of myself and curious how much change and transformation I could create. I was having fun!

I began to ask what was possible for me I’d never imagined and realized that who I actually am is completely different from who I had thought I wanted to become. I discovered my soul purpose was connected to my inner work and my years of struggle and transformation meant that I had something valuable to offer others.

“What we are waiting for is not as important as what happens to us while we are waiting. Trust the process.” – Mandy Hale

3. I had the unshakeable belief something else was possible

As growth, healing, and expansion became my highest goal, the details filled themselves in. The right people and things showed up to trigger my growth and to support me which helped me be less fearful, and more able to give and receive love from others.

I lost layers of accumulated emotional garbage and started to connect with my power and purpose. I stopped telling my victim story (except to inspire others) and I began to trust myself and have faith in life again to have my back.

4. I made heaps of mistakes and instead of feeling bad about it, I felt determined, courageous and free

This part was tough. There were setbacks, embarrassments, discouragements and challenges but I wasn’t going to give in and quit.  

I had to suck at some things in order to get better. Creating a new life from scratch is a great way to lose ego. There were a few hurdles where I would get super upset, yet giving up was never an option.

There’s no point in being upset so I sucked it up and moved on. This takes courage and feels totally weird at first, but it is so worth it.

5. I became a new version of me

In the course of recreating myself, I began to develop new attributes. I was so focusing on changing, I didn’t notice what was different about me at first.

Every few months I would write my goals and it wasn’t until I would check them that I began to realize how much I’d accomplished in the process of changing me.

This became clearer whenever I would run across someone who I once looked up to because their life suddenly looked smaller than I remembered. While they had been comfortable and barely moving, I had plodded past them like the proverbial tortoise. As I stay on this trajectory, the benefits and changes multiply exponentially over time.

“Every day, you reinvent yourself. You’re always in motion. But you decide every day: forward or backward.” – James Altucher

6. I became open to new ideas and concepts

In the process of being cracked wide open by life, I became curious, accepting and interested in different ideas, concepts and techniques.

Things like manifesting, consciousness, spirituality and other ‘strange’ ideas became my friends.  After years of trying to create change via psychological means, effort, willpower and implementing traditional tools of personal development, I found my wheelhouse in the different.

Today I am grateful for my early adversity and my own persistence and determination. Without them, who I am today would have remained undiscovered and I wouldn’t get to do the cool stuff I do with other people. I am grateful for the amazing tools and information around today, which can make the journey so much easier.

What helps you keep moving when you feel like giving up? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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Life

As Bad As Smoking? 3 Reasons to Occasionally Unplug From Technology

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take a break from technology

A popular meme reads: “I’m having people over to stare at their phones later if you want to come by…” It’s kind of funny in an alarming way since many people would consider walking barefoot across flaming hot coals before parting with their smartphones for a few weeks.

As useful as things like the Internet and mobile devices are, taking time to occasionally unplug is a good habit. Even if for no other reason than to develop your willpower and avoid being too heavily addicted to your wireless toy.

Consider the following three reasons for periodically unplugging from technology and taking a minute to smell the roses:

1. Face-To-Face Interaction

As useful as social media is for things like marketing, maintaining contact with old friends and sending messages across the world in the blink of an eye, there’s no substitute for a friendly meeting and a firm handshake.

There are few things in life that have more potential to increase our happiness than building good relationships with the people around us. Taking the effort to postpone the reading and answering of your latest text message in order to listen and offer attention to the person in front of you can be a great way to improve relationships and show people you care.

If you want a more practical and success-driven reason, then consider the fact that developing a healthy network is one of the most powerful ways to successfully grow your business or career. Spending a business lunch or golf game glued to your touchscreen is a lousy way to build that network.

2. Creative Thinking

Creativity is another powerful asset in your effort to expand your success, solve your problems and increase your happiness. Getting in the habit of frequent, diligent reading (an activity often performed with mobile devices) is essential in developing your creative capacity. In addition, investing alone time to occasionally take a step back to think, review options and consider possible solutions towards life’s struggles is a great quality.

Making a habit of doing so can be beneficial for planning your career, planning an exciting night out on the town with your spouse, planning how to discipline your teenager and plenty more.

“Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart.” – Mencius

3. Health Concerns

The health risks caused by electromagnetic frequencies (EMFs) are numerous and not to be ignored. Health damaging EMFs are emitted by various types of electronic devices including cellphones, tablets and laptops among others. Although pretending these dangers don’t exist may seem convenient, there’s nothing convenient about dealing with the consequences. Some have even suggested that cell phones may eventually prove to be as cancerous as cigarettes. Don’t believe me?

In the book ‘The Non-Tinfoil Guide To EMFs’, Nicolas Pineault writes, “A $25M study performed by the US National Toxicology Program (NTP) studied the effects of exposing rats and mice to an amount of cellphone radiation equivalent to what a human would get by talking for 30 minutes a day, for 36 years.

“As reported by Microwave News: ‘The exposed rats were found to have higher rates of two types of cancers: glioma, a tumor of the glial cells in the brain, and malignant schwannoma of the heart, a very rare tumor. None of the unexposed control rats developed either type of tumor.’

“The irony is the whole reason John Bucher, the senior manager of the NTP study, wanted his agency to run this study is to prove once and for all that cellphones do not cause cancer.”

Swearing off technology is probably not the most practical solution. (Although if that’s your thing, then rock on.) That said, occasionally taking a break from technology and spending some time in nature might help counteract some of the negative effects.

Bonus: Stress Reduction

With so many people in our culture complaining of excessive stress and/or taking antidepressants, it makes sense to proactively take steps to reduce stress before it builds up so much that you experience a nervous breakdown.

I don’t know about you, but when I get away from the computer or turn off my mobile device for a bit, I can feel the difference. If I’ve been working on my laptop or tablet for too long, then getting away and taking a break offers a noticeable relief. I almost immediately feel calmer.

If you’ve been on your phone/tablet/computer for a while, consider taking a few minutes after you finish reading this article to leave technology behind and catch a breath of fresh air.

“The more ways we have to connect, the more many of us seem desperate to unplug.” – Pico Iyer

Are you ready to build stronger relationships? Are you ready to proactively develop creative solutions? Are you ready to start preserving your health? Are you ready to leave some of that stress behind you? If so, then it’s time to fit a periodical unplug into your schedule. You might be surprised by how much this helps.

How many hours of the day do you use your phone? Are you being productive on it? Let us know in the comments below so we can help one another.

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Life

Change Your Life Forever With These 30 Strategies

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change your life
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There are strategies which bring together all happy and successful people who can also use them to improve the quality of your life. Usually when you want to change your life, you don’t know where to start and you risk losing the motivation because you don’t know the best strategies to apply. To change your life forever you have to change yourself. If you want to achieve extraordinary results, you must become an extraordinary person. (more…)

Danilo Maruca is a mental coach and personal growth expert. It accompanies people in achieving their goals by teaching them how to overcome anxiety and fears, give the best of themselves and get results quickly with mental training. He also manages the website www.drittoallameta.it.

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6 Comments

6 Comments

  1. Lorna Harkins

    Jan 30, 2017 at 9:33 am

    Glad you agree Rodrigo 🙂

    Good luck JuneBug ! Let me know how you get on

  2. Lorna Harkins

    Jan 30, 2017 at 9:31 am

    Thanks for your comment Olga ! Goodluck with your goal of learning French 🙂

  3. JuneBug

    Jan 30, 2017 at 1:25 am

    Ok here I go.

  4. Rodrigo

    Jan 29, 2017 at 8:03 pm

    Totally agree!

  5. Olga

    Jan 29, 2017 at 4:47 pm

    My goal for this year is to learn the French language. It doesn’t always come easy to learn this language, though, I discovered so much about myself during this 1,5 years! I would’ve never figured anything out if I was still living at home.

  6. chhaayahn

    Jan 29, 2017 at 3:05 pm

    Its very simple yet powerful. As you said i tried to visualize the things i want in my life in paper. Suprisingly i felt motivated. By Writing in paper i felt responsible of my own life. I truly want my life to be how i visualized today. I need to work out as per your simple suggestion. Thank you.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

Change Your Life Forever With These 30 Strategies

Published

on

change your life

There are strategies which bring together all happy and successful people who can also use them to improve the quality of your life. Usually when you want to change your life, you don’t know where to start and you risk losing the motivation because you don’t know the best strategies to apply. To change your life forever you have to change yourself. If you want to achieve extraordinary results, you must become an extraordinary person.

Here are 30 ways you can change your life today:

1. Face your fears, first the smallest, then the greatest.

2. Transform gratitude into a daily and constant mood. This will allow you to change your life.

3. Be conscious in every moment of what you think, feel, desire and do. Be Present. Do the exercises of “Remembering yourself” all year round.

4. Engage in realizing your dreams, creating a monthly plan with daily actions to accomplish them.

5. Decide what person you want to become, create a purpose that will guide your life and your days.

6. Practice observing thoughts, without identifying yourself with them.

7. Make your power supply healthier.

8. Read more books and take part in several courses and seminars.

9. Always out of the ordinary, do not imitate the mass.

10. Make gentle gestures to people you don’t know.

11. Imagine yourself while you have realized your dreams.

12. Take more time to be alone and get to know you better.

13. Live with the awareness that nothing is yours, everything is a gift.

14. Stop complaining; stop complaining; stop complaining.

15. Help others with the example.

16. Smile and laugh more often, even without reason.

17. Stay for a longer time in contact with nature.

18. Think, talk and act as the person you want to become.

19. Be punctual and if you make a mistake, please apologize.

20. Say thank you for each gift, learn to receive.

21. Change a habit or recurring reaction.

22. Take responsibility for the successes and failures you achieve, never point your finger at someone else.

23. Admire and bless more often.

24. Strive to perceive perfection and beauty in everything that happens to you.

25. Inwardly love your enemies, even if you don’t talk to them externally.

26. Learn a musical instrument or a new language.

27. Keep promises made.

28. During a difficult period ask yourself “What can I learn from this situation”?

29. Do more often what is right and less what is convenient for you.

30. Change your way of thinking.

If you want to change your life forever, you must act as if you were already the person you want to become. Take action as if you were already sure of yourself, and see what beliefs are held by successful people, great leaders, the best in your industry and those who get great results.

Listening to them, spend time with them, try to understand what they think, how they see each other, and what they think about their activity. Read the books of those who get the same results that you want to achieve, listen to their interviews, read their autobiographies, and find out what their mental attitude is.

All successful people have similar beliefs

I’ll tell you a secret: There is no greater psychological strength than the need we have to remain consistent with our own identity; to remain consistent with who we believe we are. What does that mean? Simple, that everything that anything I put after the words “I am:…” becomes reality.

If you think you are shy, you will do everything you can to act accordingly. If you believe you are extroverted, you will give everything to act accordingly. Listen and pay attention to what you add after the words “I am…”. If you don’t believe you can achieve your goals beyond the objective difficulties, you won’t be able to do it anyway: you will be the first cause of your failure.

Which one of these 30 strategies will you implement in your life today? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Continue Reading

Life

Lost Your Mojo? Focus on These 3 Areas to Get Back in the Game

Published

on

get back in the game

It’s time for some good news! You’re only ever lacking in three areas and guess what? You can turn those 3 things around relatively easily and quickly!

It’s easy to get caught up thinking, that you’re miles behind, that you can’t find your flow or mojo or that you’re just lazy and unmotivated. The good news is you are only a few decisions, actions and days away from finding your mojo again!

Here are 3 things you need to look at when you’re feeling down and out:

1. Energy levels

The first place to look when you lose your mojo is your energy levels. What are you eating & drinking? Are you eating lean, green and light? If you aren’t already, cut your intake down and focus on hydrating your body with water and eating fresh organic food. Being light on your feet and energizing your body is most important.

Also, take a look at your exercise regime. Are you exercising for energy or are you burning your body out at the gym? Make sure you are getting good consistent rest every night and don’t forget to spend some time alone in nature connecting with your inner most self.

“You just got to wake up with a smile and love every minute of building your dream.” – Joe Duncan

2. Production levels

The second place to look is your production levels or more so, your lack of production! Are you producing enough work or activity to get the results you want? That’s usually the real cause of most of your problems; a lack of work, effort and momentum. In many cases a lack of production stems from a lack of energy – but hey, we’re working on that right?

3. Confidence levels

The third place to look when you’re floundering is your confidence levels. But don’t panic, we all lose our confidence from time to time. When you lose your confidence and your sense of certainty, everything else will be impacted, especially your performance.

The best way to get your confidence back is to go back to basics for a few days and try and build some momentum and get your flow back. You lose your confidence when you lose your self belief, so do the simple things you know you can do well, then you’ll start to believe in your ability again!

“You won’t always get it right, but that doesn’t mean you’re never going to get it right.” – Joe Duncan

It’s time to get your mojo back and get back in the game. Remember next time when you get stuck you only have to make adjustments in these three areas and most likely they will only be small tweaks and changes that need to be implemented. 

Click here if you are having trouble finding your flow, lost motivation and need some help to get back on your feet!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Continue Reading

Life

How Never Giving Up Can Lead You From Pain and Suffering to Ease and Joy

Published

on

never give up

I struggled with many aspects of life early on such as growing up in challenging circumstances and getting bullied at school. I read my first self-development book at 13 and attended many courses and workshops, but nothing I encountered made the difference for me. It was only once I found a set of energetic processes and tools which I now use in my life and my work that I was able to turn things around.

Today, I get to write for you about my experiences, run a thriving mentoring and healing practice and travel to attend classes and events.

Here are some of the things I’ve done/learned along the way:

1. I took responsibility for my actions

I believe we attract all our experiences in order to learn from them. It is tough when we go through things we don’t know how to handle and experience pain, fear and anxiety as a result.  

This leaves us many emotions to release and a skill gap to bridge, which if done right, allows us to develop a level of confidence about how to turn experience into awareness and integrate our learning into wisdom for future ease and higher outcomes.

For me, learning to let go was hard (we are not taught this and I kept feeling like I had to hold onto things to protect myself). After a while, I came to the decision that “It’s not what’s happened to me, it’s how I deal with it that matters”.

Choosing from this space was empowering and allowed me to move from regret and develop a sense of purpose from my experiences.

2. I jumped off the cliff without a parachute and became inspired and trusting on the way down

I had gotten to the point where if I stayed where I was, I would die. I didn’t know how my life would look or who I would become in the process of changing, yet I knew if I was going to survive I had to become a radically different version of me.

Once I made that decision, I found the tools I was looking for that were relatable, fun and powerful. I began to change my thoughts, feelings and emotions and way of viewing the world.

After a while, instead of using personal development to escape the pain of my life, I became addicted to pursuing the highest version of myself and curious how much change and transformation I could create. I was having fun!

I began to ask what was possible for me I’d never imagined and realized that who I actually am is completely different from who I had thought I wanted to become. I discovered my soul purpose was connected to my inner work and my years of struggle and transformation meant that I had something valuable to offer others.

“What we are waiting for is not as important as what happens to us while we are waiting. Trust the process.” – Mandy Hale

3. I had the unshakeable belief something else was possible

As growth, healing, and expansion became my highest goal, the details filled themselves in. The right people and things showed up to trigger my growth and to support me which helped me be less fearful, and more able to give and receive love from others.

I lost layers of accumulated emotional garbage and started to connect with my power and purpose. I stopped telling my victim story (except to inspire others) and I began to trust myself and have faith in life again to have my back.

4. I made heaps of mistakes and instead of feeling bad about it, I felt determined, courageous and free

This part was tough. There were setbacks, embarrassments, discouragements and challenges but I wasn’t going to give in and quit.  

I had to suck at some things in order to get better. Creating a new life from scratch is a great way to lose ego. There were a few hurdles where I would get super upset, yet giving up was never an option.

There’s no point in being upset so I sucked it up and moved on. This takes courage and feels totally weird at first, but it is so worth it.

5. I became a new version of me

In the course of recreating myself, I began to develop new attributes. I was so focusing on changing, I didn’t notice what was different about me at first.

Every few months I would write my goals and it wasn’t until I would check them that I began to realize how much I’d accomplished in the process of changing me.

This became clearer whenever I would run across someone who I once looked up to because their life suddenly looked smaller than I remembered. While they had been comfortable and barely moving, I had plodded past them like the proverbial tortoise. As I stay on this trajectory, the benefits and changes multiply exponentially over time.

“Every day, you reinvent yourself. You’re always in motion. But you decide every day: forward or backward.” – James Altucher

6. I became open to new ideas and concepts

In the process of being cracked wide open by life, I became curious, accepting and interested in different ideas, concepts and techniques.

Things like manifesting, consciousness, spirituality and other ‘strange’ ideas became my friends.  After years of trying to create change via psychological means, effort, willpower and implementing traditional tools of personal development, I found my wheelhouse in the different.

Today I am grateful for my early adversity and my own persistence and determination. Without them, who I am today would have remained undiscovered and I wouldn’t get to do the cool stuff I do with other people. I am grateful for the amazing tools and information around today, which can make the journey so much easier.

What helps you keep moving when you feel like giving up? Let us know in the comments below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

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As Bad As Smoking? 3 Reasons to Occasionally Unplug From Technology

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take a break from technology

A popular meme reads: “I’m having people over to stare at their phones later if you want to come by…” It’s kind of funny in an alarming way since many people would consider walking barefoot across flaming hot coals before parting with their smartphones for a few weeks.

As useful as things like the Internet and mobile devices are, taking time to occasionally unplug is a good habit. Even if for no other reason than to develop your willpower and avoid being too heavily addicted to your wireless toy.

Consider the following three reasons for periodically unplugging from technology and taking a minute to smell the roses:

1. Face-To-Face Interaction

As useful as social media is for things like marketing, maintaining contact with old friends and sending messages across the world in the blink of an eye, there’s no substitute for a friendly meeting and a firm handshake.

There are few things in life that have more potential to increase our happiness than building good relationships with the people around us. Taking the effort to postpone the reading and answering of your latest text message in order to listen and offer attention to the person in front of you can be a great way to improve relationships and show people you care.

If you want a more practical and success-driven reason, then consider the fact that developing a healthy network is one of the most powerful ways to successfully grow your business or career. Spending a business lunch or golf game glued to your touchscreen is a lousy way to build that network.

2. Creative Thinking

Creativity is another powerful asset in your effort to expand your success, solve your problems and increase your happiness. Getting in the habit of frequent, diligent reading (an activity often performed with mobile devices) is essential in developing your creative capacity. In addition, investing alone time to occasionally take a step back to think, review options and consider possible solutions towards life’s struggles is a great quality.

Making a habit of doing so can be beneficial for planning your career, planning an exciting night out on the town with your spouse, planning how to discipline your teenager and plenty more.

“Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart.” – Mencius

3. Health Concerns

The health risks caused by electromagnetic frequencies (EMFs) are numerous and not to be ignored. Health damaging EMFs are emitted by various types of electronic devices including cellphones, tablets and laptops among others. Although pretending these dangers don’t exist may seem convenient, there’s nothing convenient about dealing with the consequences. Some have even suggested that cell phones may eventually prove to be as cancerous as cigarettes. Don’t believe me?

In the book ‘The Non-Tinfoil Guide To EMFs’, Nicolas Pineault writes, “A $25M study performed by the US National Toxicology Program (NTP) studied the effects of exposing rats and mice to an amount of cellphone radiation equivalent to what a human would get by talking for 30 minutes a day, for 36 years.

“As reported by Microwave News: ‘The exposed rats were found to have higher rates of two types of cancers: glioma, a tumor of the glial cells in the brain, and malignant schwannoma of the heart, a very rare tumor. None of the unexposed control rats developed either type of tumor.’

“The irony is the whole reason John Bucher, the senior manager of the NTP study, wanted his agency to run this study is to prove once and for all that cellphones do not cause cancer.”

Swearing off technology is probably not the most practical solution. (Although if that’s your thing, then rock on.) That said, occasionally taking a break from technology and spending some time in nature might help counteract some of the negative effects.

Bonus: Stress Reduction

With so many people in our culture complaining of excessive stress and/or taking antidepressants, it makes sense to proactively take steps to reduce stress before it builds up so much that you experience a nervous breakdown.

I don’t know about you, but when I get away from the computer or turn off my mobile device for a bit, I can feel the difference. If I’ve been working on my laptop or tablet for too long, then getting away and taking a break offers a noticeable relief. I almost immediately feel calmer.

If you’ve been on your phone/tablet/computer for a while, consider taking a few minutes after you finish reading this article to leave technology behind and catch a breath of fresh air.

“The more ways we have to connect, the more many of us seem desperate to unplug.” – Pico Iyer

Are you ready to build stronger relationships? Are you ready to proactively develop creative solutions? Are you ready to start preserving your health? Are you ready to leave some of that stress behind you? If so, then it’s time to fit a periodical unplug into your schedule. You might be surprised by how much this helps.

How many hours of the day do you use your phone? Are you being productive on it? Let us know in the comments below so we can help one another.

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