Life
Read This to Change How You Think About Perfectionism
Perfectionism is on the rise, especially among young people. A January study published by the American Psychological Association, found that between 1989 and 2016, self-oriented perfectionism — or the need to be perfect — increased by 10 percent. During the same time period, other-oriented perfectionism — placing higher expectations on others — grew by 16 percent.
So, what’s the solution? Surprisingly, expectation management. Intuition says that letting perfectionists, whether self-oriented or other-oriented, set expectations will lead to unrealistic goals. However, trying to keep them from setting high standards isn’t an option because it’s in their nature.
Below we will see how to show perfectionists at all levels within a company how to use their personality type to their advantage:
1. Employees
Self-oriented perfectionism
While most young people flounder to find a career path, perfectionists know exactly what they want. Their perfectionism can lead to great professional goals, as long as the expectations are managed properly. Arrange mentorships between experienced employees and young professionals to discuss their personal goals.
For instance, let’s say an employee wants to become a manager within three years. The more experienced colleague can then explain what it takes to get there and whether or not that timeline is realistic. With that information, the self-oriented perfectionist can create an actionable plan that meets their expectations.
Other-oriented perfectionism
Before an individual even applies for a job, they create expectations. They do research and form an idea of what it would be like to work there. Once hired, they then expect leaders and co-workers to fit into that vision even though it can lead to them being overly critical of others.
Manage these expectations early by explaining that not every employee contributes to the company in the same way. This person was hired to do a specific job, and their success will look different than a co-worker’s.
Make this clear when acknowledging your employees. When you publicly praise an employee, tie their performance to the company mission. This way, perfectionists will see how everyone fits into the big picture. They’ll then be able to form new expectations that reflect each co-worker’s role in the organization.
“Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.” – Salvador Dali
2. Managers
Self-oriented perfectionism – Managers who are self-oriented perfectionists face a unique dilemma. They want to succeed, but their success is tied to their team. If their employees falter, managers feel like they’ve failed.
As a leader, you need to adjust their perspective. Have managers list what is under their control and what isn’t. For instance, they can set a goal to meet weekly with each employee to discuss performance. However, they can’t blame themselves if an employee doesn’t take their advice. Once they have their list, have them set expectations for themselves — only themselves. Also, make sure there is a clear way to assess their success.
If they want to improve their communication skills, ask them what this would look like. Would it mean receiving fewer clarification questions from their team or would it mean spending more time listening to employees? This will help them form a clear definition of personal success.
Other-oriented perfectionism
When a manager is an other-oriented perfectionist, they can overwhelm their team with high expectations. Nonetheless, when they properly harness their need for perfection, they can motivate their team.
Remind managers that, as a perfectionist, they have a very clear picture of what employees’ success looks like. The trick is getting their team members to buy into these goals. For example, employees may think it’s unrealistic to increase sales by 25 percent in three months. But a manager who’s an other-oriented perfectionist sees a clear road to that milestone.
To ease employee doubts, encourage managers to break down larger expectations with employees. Have them set smaller goals for each individual and clearly explain the unique role they play in achieving these goals. This will turn an other-oriented perfectionist’s goal from overwhelming to motivating.
“Always do your best. What you plant now, you will harvest later.” – Og Mandino
3. Yourself
Self-oriented perfectionism
Leaders with self-oriented perfectionism tend to spread themselves too thin. They feel they need to be a part of every aspect of the organization, but this inevitably leads to failure.
Instead of trying to be perfect at everything, take stock of your strengths — and be honest. For instance, if you came from a marketing background, don’t create high expectations for yourself when it comes to product development. Instead, surround yourself with colleagues and employees who make up for those weaknesses.
Other-oriented perfectionism
As a leader, you see endless potential, but sometimes, you can push everyone too far. Avoid this by tracking progress toward each goal. Set smaller expectations to satisfy your perfectionist instincts. Every time a small goal is met, celebrate that success with your team.
Most importantly, be sure that the data you’re tracking is objective. One issue perfectionist leaders face is defining great work. You envision one result, while everyone else imagines something different. Numbers are less subjective and help you maintain a realistic perspective.
Has the need for perfectionism improved your life? Let us know your thoughts below!
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
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Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
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Read quality literature in your free time.
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Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
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Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
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Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
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