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How I RE-ENGINEERED My Life: This Will Help You.

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Image Credit: Unsplash (Vladimir Proskurovskiy)

I can help you. I’m just a regular guy with a pretty stock standard upbringing.

I hit a massive brick wall and made the decision to take every piece of my life and put it back together in a way that works.

I call this process “Re-engineering your life.”

Yep, I like that description a lot.

Many of you have very similar challenges to what I faced and so I want to use storytelling and a few practical strategies to help you.

Here’s how I re-engineered my life and how you can do the same:


Dealt with mental health.

Mental health has always been a taboo subject. Last week, on LinkedIn, I came out of the closet. I shared a photo of me in primary school and told my lifelong battle with anxiety.

It wasn’t easy, but it was a must. A few years back I cured myself of my mental health issues.

You can do the same by using these strategies:

  • Admit to yourself that you have an issue (biggest one)
  • Seek professional advice to begin with
    Put together a list of fears and tackle them one by one
     (this builds confidence)
  • Attend a Tony Robbins Event and walk on fire (helps you see that anything is possible)
  • Practice meditation before high-stress events

Overcoming anxiety for me was not easy. It required me to break my comfort-zone and deliberately seek out strategies and practical things I could do.
Re-engineering your life is about getting your mind in order first.

You can’t get your mind in shape if you have mental health issues like anxiety weighing you down”

Deal with the issues of the mind and you’ll finally be able to see your future clearly and the possibilities that are available to you.


Believed in myself through persistence.

During the re-engineering process, I wrote down what I was saying to myself.There were lots of insults I was saying to myself. Every time there was a challenge, my mind was telling myself that I couldn’t do it. I had zero belief in myself. I was my own worst enemy. Acknowledgment of this fact changed everything.

I altered the conversation in my head to “I can do it and there’s no harm in trying.”

I deleted the “I can’t do it talk” and chose blind optimism and a default response that would set me up to win. Sure there was failures. I tried lots of challenges and failed at most of them.

I went for job interviews and then vomited afterwards from nerves.
I cried a few times when girls broke up with me.
I got a plane and nearly passed out from fear.

Through every situation though, I built an inner belief. This voice of positivity in my head got louder and louder.

The more challenges I tried, the more times I learned a few lessons. These lessons turned into goals that I was able to achieve.

It sounds cliche but believing in yourself is at the center of all transformation.You can’t re-engineer your life unless you believe in yourself.

I’d encourage you to go for blind optimism. It will allow you to fail more and gain much bigger wins. The choice is yours.


Let go of anger.

All of us are holding anger inside ourselves (except maybe Nelson Mandella — when he was alive). That guy was a legend, but we’re not all Mr. Mandela.

I was holding anger from past relationships, an ongoing family feud, neighbors that stole my car spot, the guy that mowed the lawn because he let grass flick up onto my car and even the person in front of me that was walking too slow.

Everyone was consciously my enemy. This was a fucked way to live.
The anger built up inside of me and it made mediating nearly impossible. The constant chatter in my mind from all the anger never stopped.

Every person I met was violating some BS rule I had in my head that they were supposed to adhere to without knowing what it was”

Many of us are living in denial. We think we’re not storing anger, but we are.
What did I do? What can you do? Start forgiving people who you’re angry at. Don’t do it to help them; do it to help yourself. Set yourself free from negativity by quitting the ‘Anger Games” (did I just turn a movie title into a catchphrase?)

Practically I did the following:

  • Gave the neighbor I was pissed at a lift when it was raining
  • Forgave BS family issues from 10 years ago that had nothing to do with me from the beginning
  • Stopped caring about the grass hitting my stupid car and washed it
  • Showed compassion to strangers rather than wondering why they walked so slow

Re-engineering your life is about forgiving more so you can clear your mind and make room for awesomeness.


Limiting beliefs about money.

The startup culture of wearing a t-shirt and jeans for the rest of my life and walking over everybody else in pursuit of the almighty dollar screwed up my ideas about what money really was. This #StartupLife made me become obsessed with money and the creation of it. I started to believe that I would never have enough money.

I thought the dream of owning a home was unlikely because my idea of home ownership was a mansion with six bedrooms in the best postcode in Australia.

These beliefs have since changed and I’m now not obsessed with mansions. I’d rather spend money on experiences and holidays. This challenge with money, if I’m being honest, is not entirely fixed and still needs work. Such is life.

With that said, what changed my beliefs about money was this the following:

  • Spending time with the homeless
  • Seeing what the regrets of the dying were
  • Watching about 50% of my relatives die in a short space of time
  • Looking back on when I had lots of money and seeing how unhappy I was
  • Working with successful entrepreneurs that sold their businesses and became chronically unhappy

It’s amazing what real-world situations can do to show you what’s real and what’s not.

Don’t believe everything Instagram tells you about life through photos. You don’t need all those shiny toys and the wanting of them is distracting you from what matters.


Felt sick and tired.

Our eating habits can often be forgotten. We’re trained through advertising to see cake, soda and deep fried food as okay.

What changed the game for me was when someone asked me the following:
“How do you feel Tim? Energy-wise that is.”

The real answer was tired and sick even though I didn’t want to admit it.Energy is a bonus but feeling sick is where the real problem lies.

You’re not supposed to walk around feeling unwell and having to take tablets from the chemist. Getting real about whether you feel tired is a big step. Once you acknowledge the truth, there are easy ways to fix the problem.

Imagine you felt high on energy every day. How would that make you feel?
It’s a question so many of us can’t answer because we’ve never experienced it. Once you do, you’ll never go back.

Re-engineering your life is about feeling good and having the energy to do what you love — and care for those you love”


Quit my boring career.

Lots of us are going to work and hating it. We keep doing it because the addiction to money that pays the mortgage on the oversize house we don’t need is too great.

Money can never replace a career where you wake up each day excited to go to work. I’ve left this nightmare of a life where work sucked. I’m sure you have too.

When I quit doing work I hated and got closer to my passion for social media, blogging and personal development, I saw a drastic change. Work became a driver for everything I did outside of work. I was able to marry my career and my passions together. They began to blend into one.

Job dissatisfaction is very common and getting rid of it will make you feel like a new person. It’s not easy though

I did tonnes of interviews.
Got a bunch of rejections.
Persisted for a long time.

Most of all, though, I kept taking small steps towards something that I loved. 
That last one was the defining moment for me.

Instantly transferring to your dream career is tough. Taking small steps towards it is much more practical and achievable in the long run.

Re-engineering your life involves doing work you love. Not for the money; for the love of it. Waking up will never be the same when you’ve got to do work you love.

<<<>>>

If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net


Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

Life

How to Protect Yourself From Other People’s Negativity

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When I was a kid, it seemed like I felt pain more than anyone else around me. Not just physical pain, but emotional pain. I cried easily, over many things. I had an especially hard time when people were fighting around me, and I didn’t even have to be involved. I could feel the negative energy and felt upset and overwhelmed. I didn’t have a constructive way of handling it. (more…)

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How to Write a Personal Destiny Statement in 3 Steps

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We all have a God-given destiny to fulfill that we were each born with. I personally believe it is buried deep down within us. The number one secret to success is to let it emerge out of you and release it to the world. What is my destiny you may ask? It is the thing you would regret not doing before leaving Planet Earth. (more…)

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Life

Don’t Want To Feel Like A Failure Anymore? Stop Doing These 6 Things

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It’s pretty annoying isn’t it? All those great and accomplished people telling you that FAILURE is a necessity on your way to success. Yeah, that’s easy for them to say; they’re already ‘on the other side’! You on the other hand, are still struggling all day everyday to get your business lifted off the ground and are really not that sure if you’re indeed going to make it.

There’s that little voice in your head that keeps telling you that you don’t have the stuff to make it all happen. Not now and not ever. You feel like a failure…it’s holding you back and you don’t know how to deal with it. Well you could do yourself a favor and start dealing with it by doing the following things:

1. Stop Denying You Feel Like A Failure

Telling yourself things are going great when they’re not is one of the biggest, though most useless, coping mechanisms human beings deploy in rough times. Common denial signals among entrepreneurs: trying to regain more control by working even more hours and on the other side compensating this by letting go of all this control by partying and drinking way too hard.

What you’re doing is denying yourself the opportunity to actually feel what’s going on and acknowledge the problem; that both you and your business are in a bad place. Without acknowledging it, it’ll be pretty difficult to actually STOP feeling it. And remember, just because you feel like a failure, this does not mean that you indeed ARE a failure!

2. Stop Making It Bigger Than it Really Is

This is one of those other ‘fun’ things human beings do; we blow things way out of proportion in our heads! In business, when you lose that big client you’ve been working on for weeks, it feels like it’s the end of the world. You start doubting yourself, your strategy, your entire business model right up to the point where you barely sleep because you’re working on pivoting the whole thing.

But what if that customer simply didn’t have the money to go for your service anyway? Or what if they just decided to go for someone who is cheaper but who offers less quality? Does that mean there’s something wrong with YOU? Or that this was the ONLY customer out there and that you’re now doomed forever?

Of course not, it simply means that THIS CUSTOMER wasn’t a match. It’s a bit like dating actually…So if you take this into consideration, could it be that you just feel like a failure instead of really not succeeding in that what you want to at this point in time?

3. Stop Thinking You’re The Only One Who Feels Like This

You’re not! With the possible exception of the true sociopaths, that feeling you’re feeling is very normal to EVERYONE. It might not seem like it on the outside – because people don’t like to acknowledge this remember – but I can guarantee you that it’s true. But unlike 99% of the world’s population, YOU’RE not going to let this feeling stop you in your tracks. Are you?

4. Stop Thinking You’re Supposed To Be Superhuman

In fact, it’s very likely that you’re already doing, learning and succeeding at WAY more than most other people are. But for entrepreneurs, somehow, that never seems to be enough. You don’t just want to be successful after a few years of hard work (which is normal). You want to be successful after only a few months. Because you’re special…or at least you think you are…

Well, here’s the truth: you ARE special! But…it’s just not very likely that you’re one of those – very very rare – entrepreneurial superstars that – seemingly – just added some hot water and got instant business success as a result.

5. Stop Being So Incredibly Stubborn

Entrepreneurs are stubborn…almost by default. It’s what makes them push forward in the hardest of times. But…if you’re not doing the right things right you might just be hammering a square peg through a round hole. Which will only add to that frustrated feeling you’re already having. So why not stop being so stubborn for a moment, stop hammering away on that what obviously is not working and ask for help?

No matter who you ask – a business mentor or coach, a befriended entrepreneur – someone with a neutral perspective on you and our business will be very likely to see what’s going on with a lot more clarity than you can and can guide you to a place that will feel a whole lot more comfortable.

6. Stop Being Afraid Of Failure

I know, I know, you’ve heard this a million times before and you wouldn’t be in this pickle if you could do this. Right? I’m right there with ya!

But, if you get really rational about it, what’s the worst that could happen?

  • You might have to get a ‘real’ job for a while and start over on the side;
  • You might not be able to afford your rent anymore…but with Airbnb on the 1 hand and couchsurfing on the other, you should be able to work it out somehow;
  • You’ll have all the more experience to start over a whole lot faster;
  • You’ll be no less respected by anyone because it’s clear you gave it your all;
  • In a few years, when you’re an established and supersuccessful entrepreneur you’ll also have a cool failure story to tell;
  • None of your limbs will fall off;

Now that’s not too bad for a plan B is it? Failure is such a negative word. And the associated feeling is terrible and numbing. But really…how is giving it your all and not succeeding really the same as failing? Shouldn’t the definition of failure not be along the lines of ‘not even trying’ or ‘giving up when it gets hard’?

In other words: stop beating yourself up over this!

There’s really no need to feel like a failure at all because you’re sticking your neck out, you’re trying to make a difference and you’re still moving upward on that treacherous entrepreneurial mountain.

And that…is what success REALLY is.

Those Who Failed Their Way To Success

Quotes To Live By:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert F. Kennedy

“If you don’t try at anything, you can’t fail… it takes back bone to lead the life you want” – Richard Yates

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie

“Success is stumbling form failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm” – Winston Churchill

“Don’t let success go to your head and failure to your heart” – Will Smith

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Life

Why You Never Have Enough Time and What You Need to Do About It

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how to manage your time better
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Has this ever happened to you? You had an assignment, and the deadline was far away. You didn’t work on it much, but in the back of your mind, that insistent little voice was always whispering, “I gotta get this assignment done.” (more…)

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