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How to Let Go of Perfectionism to Succeed Faster

Perfectionism. The word that breaks or makes a person strive to reach the top of their game.



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Perfectionism. The word that breaks or makes a person strive to reach the top of their game. The dictionary states perfectionism as the ‘refusal to accept any standard short of perfection,’ whereas my definition of the word goes more along the lines of a ‘beautiful way to hate life and send yourself to the grave early.’

And before you inundate my inbox with hate mail, hear me out. I am not saying those who identify themselves as perfectionists are ill-mannered or have the wrong intentions. What I am saying is if you want to succeed and get ahead in life, perfectionism will not get you there any sooner.

Striving for the best

Sure, a person should and can strive to have the best in life. Still, there is a fine line between reaching one’s desired goals in life and failing miserably because of the unrealistic expectations one has set upon themselves with this ideology of ‘perfectionism.’ Nothing is ever perfect in life, and there will always be room for improvement in everything we do, including chasing success.

Willingness to succeed

A person who seeks to want the best in life and to reach their desired level of success is one who is motivated by the will to achieve greatness. On the other hand, perfectionists are usually driven by the fear of failure.

Fear of failure

By fearing to fail, a person fails to live. When a person chooses to live in this manner, valuing themselves only by their achievements, they set themselves up for even greater failures in life as a whole. The reason for this is that the way they value themselves becomes intertwined with their level of success. The moment they do not achieve the level of perfectionism or success they seek, they identify themselves as failures and open themselves up to criticism. The unfortunate thing here is that the one who will be giving and receiving the criticism is no one other than themselves.

“Understanding the difference between healthy striving and perfectionism is critical to laying down the shield and picking up your life. Research shows that perfectionism hampers success. In fact, it’s often the path to depression, anxiety, addiction, and life paralysis.” — Brené Brown

Embrace your losses

Rather than looking at ways to improve their methods or pathways to success, perfectionists struggle with the concept of dealing with and taking losses when things don’t go their way, which often leads to negative self-talk and the placing of unnecessary pressures on oneself. This is not only unhealthy but a difficult way to live, and after a long period of exposing oneself to such negativity, it eventually takes a significant toll on one’s emotional and mental well-being. 

To truly succeed, one must learn to embrace losses as they come and not permit roadblocks to define who they are or their level of success. Success comes to those who continue to soldier on regardless of how many times they get knocked down. Didn’t get that promotion or meet your sales target? Who cares. 

Well, perhaps your boss might, but don’t worry about that; what you should be worried about is not worrying about those little bumps in the road and being willing to accept that things can’t always be perfect or go the way you hoped on your quest to success. However, you can learn from the experience and improve your methods.

Be your cheerleader

I’ve worked with enough clients over the years to see the negative impacts perfectionism can have on a person; believe me, it is not pretty. Not only does the constant battle to be perfect take a toll on a person, but it also begins to slowly seep through to their relationships with others, including those they value the most. 

One such individual was a client of mine who worked for a Fortune 500 company. After years of pushing themselves to the extreme to achieve what they called the ‘perfect’ life, it all came crashing down, forcing them to re-evaluate their entire career and their unhealthy obsession with ‘perfectionism.’ After being pushed to the brink and having a mental breakdown, they moved to the country and opened up a little business, which by the way, is thriving! 

But best of all, they are now doing what they love without the constant negative self-talk they were accustomed to when trying to create a façade of a perfect life and chasing the idea of perfectionism.

Let it flow

There is nothing a person can’t achieve in life, and we should all strive to do the best we can. However, in doing so, we must understand and learn to accept ourselves as is, flawed and all. A person who achieves great success is not one who is perfect but rather one who is willing to be imperfect and accept that mistakes will be made along their journey to success. Perfectionism is merely an illusion that places unrealistic expectations on a person. You can only do things to the best of your ability, and if it doesn’t work, try again – that is what true success is. 

Filiz Behaettin is a best-selling author, freelance writer and speaker. Her latest book 'Elevate: the practical guide to living your best life and succeeding' is available at most bookstores including Barnes and Noble. Filiz offers 1-on-1 mentoring and consulting services, copywriting, editing and manuscript services. She is also available for corporate speaking engagements and school visits. You can contact Filiz at or follow her at

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15 Essential Habits to a Stronger, Healthier, and Happier You

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What habits can truly transform your life? That’s what you’re here to uncover. In our no-nonsense guide, we’ll introduce you to 15 habits to change your life, each with the power to improve your day-to-day existence.  (more…)

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19 Common Characteristics All Visionary Leaders Have



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How to Choose the Best Affiliate Programs for Your Blog

If you follow these steps, you can create an affiliate marketing plan that makes money, fits well with your content, and connects with your readers



how to choose the best affiliate programs for your blog

Picking the right affiliate programs for your blog is really important. It can make a big difference in how much money you can make and how much your readers get out of your blog. With so many choices out there, deciding which ones to go with can be tricky. 

This guide is here to make it easier for you. It will give you clear steps and helpful tips to choose affiliate programs that fit well with what your blog is about, what your readers like, and what you stand for. 

For more articles on this theme, please head over to this blog

Understanding Affiliate Marketing

Before you start picking affiliate programs, it’s important to really understand what affiliate marketing is and how it works. 

Basically, affiliate marketing is when you promote a product or service on your blog, and then you get paid a little bit every time someone buys something or does something because you recommended it. 

It’s great for both the person selling the product and the blogger, because the seller gets more sales with low risk, and the blogger can make money from their blog.

How to Choose the Right Affiliate Programs for Your Blog

1. Assess Your Niche and Audience

The key to doing well in affiliate marketing starts with really knowing what your blog is about and who reads it. Consider the following:

  • Your blog’s content: What topics do you cover? Ensure the products or services you promote are relevant.
  • Your audience’s interests and needs: What solutions are they seeking? Choose affiliate programs that offer products or services that solve their problems or enhance their lives.

2. Research Potential Affiliate Programs

Once you know what your blog is about and what your readers want, start looking for affiliate programs. Choose ones that are well-known for good products, great customer service, and helpful support for affiliates. Resources to find these programs include:

  • Affiliate networks like ShareASale, Commission Junction, and ClickBank.
  • Direct searches for “[Your Niche] affiliate programs” in search engines.
  • Recommendations from other bloggers in your niche.

3. Evaluate the Commission Structure

The commission structure is a critical factor to consider. Look for programs that offer competitive rates that make your efforts worthwhile. Consider:

  • The percentage of commission per sale.
  • Whether the program offers a flat rate per action (e.g., per sign-up).
  • The cookie duration, which affects how long after a click you can earn commissions on sales.

4. Consider the Program’s Reputation and Sureness

Join affiliate programs with a solid reputation for quality and sureness. This not only ensures that you’re promoting good products but also that you’ll be paid on time. You can:

  • Read reviews from other affiliates.
  • Check the program’s history and background.
  • Look for any complaints or issues reported online.

5. Analyze the Support and Resources Offered

A good affiliate program gives you things like ads to use, training on their products, and helpful managers. Having access to these resources can really help you do a better job at promoting their products.

6. Understand the Terms and Conditions

Before signing up, thoroughly review the program’s terms and conditions. Pay close attention to:

  • Payment thresholds and methods.
  • Any restrictions on how you can promote their products.
  • The program’s policy on affiliate marketing on social media platforms.

7. Test the Product or Service

If possible, test the product or service before promoting it. This firsthand experience allows you to offer genuine charge and build trust with your audience.

8. Look for Recurring Commission Opportunities

Some affiliate programs pay you again and again for subscriptions or services that charge fees regularly. These can provide a more stable income compared to one-time sales commissions.

Implementing Your Choice

After choosing the best affiliate programs, the next step is to smoothly include your affiliate marketing in your content plan. This includes:

  • Creating valuable content that naturally incorporates affiliate links.
  • Disclosing your affiliate affairs transparently to maintain trust with your audience.
  • Tracking your results to understand what works best for your audience and adjusting your strategy accordingly.

Picking the best affiliate programs for your blog involves careful planning, research, and making sure they match what your audience likes and needs. 

If you follow these steps, you can create an affiliate marketing plan that makes money, fits well with your content, and connects with your readers. 

The real key to doing well with affiliate marketing isn’t just about the products you talk about, but also how much your audience trusts and values your advice. 

With enough time, patience, and hard work, your blog can grow into a successful space that earns a good amount of affiliate money and helps your readers choose the right products.

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