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Why Mentorship Is Dead & 3 Things You Can Do About It

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Do you know what’s harder than starting a successful business? Starting one alone. There’s going to come a point where you feel like you need a helping hand. Someone who guides your journey, pushes you forward, and shows you the shortcut to the success you desperately crave.

You need to find a mentor. At least that’s what people tell you. Mentors have wisdom that could save you years of time and effort, they have experience that could accelerate the growth of your business, and they have status that represents everything you want to achieve.

But here’s the harsh truth. If you put all your faith in a single person you’re in for a nasty shock.

Here are 3 reasons why mentors are overrated and what you should do instead:

1. Mentorship is a crutch

We imitate successful people because we want to be like them. And that makes perfect sense. After all, if we think, act and conduct ourselves like they do – we will be successful too, right?

It’s more complicated than that. Your mentor represents everything you want to achieve for yourself. But the truth is they couldn’t be more different to you if they tried. They’re established, you’re starting out. They’re experienced, you’re learning. They’re accomplished, you’ve still got something to prove.

But while these differences aren’t necessarily a bad thing, you can become over reliant on your mentor’s ability to bridge the gap between where you are right now  and where you want to be tomorrow. And if this happens, it’s easy to feel like you’re living in someone’s shadow.

Take your mentor off their pedestal. They don’t always have the answers to your problems, and that’s okay because they’re human just like you. You don’t need someone to hold your hand every step of the way. Sometimes you need to walk your path alone.

“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” – Buddha

2. Mentorship is out-dated

Finding success in the working world used to be a linear process. You’d start when you were young, devote decades of your life to a single company, and if you were smart, hard working and lucky you’d eventually end up at the top.

That’s why the concept of mentorship made perfect sense. The path to success was predictable, and it wasn’t difficult to find experienced people who had already reached the end.

They offered you a crystal ball that let you anticipate challenges, capitalise on opportunities and act on insights that might never have occurred to you in the first place. Mentorship was the rocket fuel that propelled you to the end of your journey faster than you could’ve ever done alone.

Unfortunately for you, the working world isn’t straightforward anymore. In fact, people are expected to completely change their careers 5 to 7 times during their working lives. The linear path of yesteryear has been replaced by a winding road with many twists and turns, and this constant change of direction is making it impossible for mentors to keep up.

Sure, they’ll be able to guide you during certain phases. But there will come a point where the territory you’re walking in is just as unfamiliar to them as it is to you – and when that happens their advice will no longer be useful.

Stop placing all your faith in one person. You’re just going to end up disappointed. Instead look for inspiration from everyone around you. Try to understand your current situation and seek direction from people who can help you get to where you want to be in 5 years time.

3. Mentorship can be dubious

Mentorship comes in many forms – some more suspicious than others. Yes, there will always be generous people who’ll go out of their way to help you for free, but they are few and far between.

The truth is mentorship is often just a thinly disguised façade for expensive business coaching. It doesn’t stem from a sincere desire to help you or your business (despite what they keep telling you). And it probably won’t get you the results you so desperately want to achieve. In reality, this type of “mentorship” is designed to do one thing – make your mentors rich through consultation sessions and membership fees.

That’s not ideal. In fact, you can quickly start to feel exploited when the money you make is being used to line the pockets of glorified motivational speakers, rather than fuelling the trajectory of the business you are working so hard to grow.

Learning new skills is important. And to learn effectively you need great teachers. But don’t fall into the trap of confusing sleazy business coaches with idealistic, Yoda-like clichés who are willing to bend over backwards to ensure that you succeed. If you do, you’re in serious danger of being manipulated.

It’s time to move forward. Achieving success involves determination, vision and sacrifice. It’s a long, winding road – and sometimes it can get a little lonely. That’s why it’s tempting to reach for every helping hand that comes your way, but sometimes the true test of your commitment lies in knowing which hands to turn away.

Times have changed, and it’s high time that mentorship changes too. Realise when it’s time to work alone, understand when people truly have your best interests at heart, and learn to attract people who help achieve your short-term goals so that you can consistently build towards your overarching vision.

“The delicate balance of mentoring someone is not creating them in your own image, but giving them the opportunity to create themselves.” – Steven Spielberg

Do you think mentorship is dead? Please leave your thoughts and opinions in the comment box below!

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How Your Friends Determine Whether You Succeed or Not

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Can anyone do without having friends? We all have our friends, we share ideas with them, talk together, have fun, and fight. Yes, that’s the baseline of friendship. But, do you know that aside from you, your friends can determine whether you achieve success or not?

There are two things in friendship which are the ability to ”love” and the ability to “influence”. This means you are loved and you are influenced. How do your friends affect your success in life? How are they one of the biggest deciding factors of your success? Let’s find out.

What type of friends do you keep? 

First, what type of friends do you keep? Who do you call your best friend? There are two different kinds of friends, good friends, and bad ones. A lot of people have lost their pathway to success and some have also found their road to success all because of the friends they keep, the people they mingle with. 

Who is your best friend? Answer carefully. Having a best friend means you find each other compatible and understanding. Analyze who your best friend is. If your best friend has not motivated you to do something positive, if who you call your bestie has never given you positive advice, lastly if your best friend has never informed and advised you on your shortcomings, then you don’t have a best friend.

This quote tells us “birds of the same feather flock together”. Countless people have changed from their good nature into a bad one all because of friends. One thing to note is, “negative people move with negative aura”. If your best friend is filled with negativity inside-out then you will surely be affected by his/her negative aura.

They influence your success with positivity or negativity 

The friends you keep can either influence you with positivity or negativity because your friends have the power to change your kind of person completely. 

This is how your friends influence you:

  1. They influence you indirectly with what they do
  2. They influence you directly by teaching and giving you advice 

Yes, that is how they influence you. For instance, you watch a movie and you like the way the actor walks. The question is if you truly like the way the actor walks, won’t you try to imitate the actor? Of course, you will.

Just the way you imitate the actor is the same way your friends can influence you with their character. However, the funny part is, they don’t have to teach you to do things like them. You just find yourself imitating and copying them gradually.

An important question to ask is, are you imitating a good friend or a bad one? If you imitate a good friend then you will be good, but if you imitate a bad person, you will surely become a bad person.

Everyone wants to succeed, a good friend will always teach, enlighten, and motivate you for success. A bad friend will only motivate you to do evil things (smoking, drinking, fight, envy,).

And you should know that things like that are a great enemy of success and even of God. So, if you have these bad elements in your life, how will you achieve success? There is no way!

And also, they can teach and advise you directly. But, what do your friends teach you? When you ask them for advice do they inspire you positively or teach you the bad stuff.? A lot of people have regretted lifelong decisions just by listening to the advice of friends. 

The company you keep has the power to influence and change you. Never forget that a positive influence will teach, motivate, and brush you up for success. While a negative influence will inspire you to become a bad person, change your good nature, and leave you with regrets in the end.

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The 3 Step Process to Building a Profitable Pitch

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As a communication coach, one of the top questions entrepreneurs ask me is how to deliver a winning pitch to potential investors. They want to know if there’s a magic formula to get an investor to say yes and buy into their dream and their business. (more…)

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The 4 Pillars of Wealth and Abundance

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Have you ever wondered what the formula for a wealthy and abundant life is? Many people have. Lots has been written about the subject of wealth creation and living an abundant life. It was a breaking point in my journey and pursuit of success when I found out that there is a clear path to achieve success in life. Thanks to those who have shared their journey, we can clearly see and follow the principles of prosperity. (more…)

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Here Are 4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Podcast, Youtube Channel or Online Show

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Confidence comes from a place of strong understanding of self. After close to three years on radio, I’ve grown from a shy introvert to a shy introvert with an extrovert persona. When the mic is turned on, I can channel a version of myself that some say is attractive, strong, and of course, confident but it wasn’t always this way.

What I want to share with you is what I discovered on this journey into broadcast that you can apply to your life, your ventures, and your personal development. This doesn’t require any fancy gear. It does require a leap of faith on your part because once you go down the road of media; it can change your life.

1. Perceived Expertise

When you go to a doctor, you expect their knowledge will guide them to a solution to your problems. When you have a show, you become your listeners’ doctor. For all the multiple thousands, maybe millions, of YouTube channels, podcasts, and user-created content in the world, each person that gets behind a mic takes a position on their passion, their opinions, and their themes.

They challenge the status quo for the benefit of their listeners in hopes to entertain and educate. With consistency on your side, those fans place you on a platform and give you permission to influence them.

2. Global Acknowledgement

One of the benefits to increasing confidence is when you receive thank you notes from people you may never meet. The feeling of enriching someone’s life from halfway around the globe, provides validation you’re enhancing someone else’s life with your wisdom and your wit.

The very first time I was told I was making a difference in someone’s life in a country other than my own, I felt like I caused massive impact that transcends my circle of influence. When you experience just how much you can cause impact and it comes back to you, it’ll change your worldview.

“Be grateful for what you have and stop complaining – it bores everybody else, does you no good, and doesn’t solve any problems.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Backed By Numbers

One of the most exciting ways to measure success is to quantify your growth. It’s not enough to just broadcast. Having subscribers and downloads helps to know, numerically, how well you’re doing. Word of caution. This can be a way to set yourself up for distress because of number envy but if you understand what the numbers mean; you can control the narrative of the numbers.

The major number that makes most people smile is 10,000. I’d advise it to be 1. Here’s why. As you grow in your industry, so does your reach. If you learned that the one person that subscribed totally changed for the better because of you, wouldn’t that be worth the effort?

4. Effective Communication

While it’s not talked about much, having a show is documentation. You create a dynamic account of your life, your industry, and the pulse on what’s important simply by having a show. When you find a channel to improve your communication skills, you demand attention and people will listen to you. You become more trusted as a leader and people will follow you once they believe you can lead them to their wants and needs.

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Tony Robbins

These insights have helped many people become leaders and, ultimately, move others to their best selves. It’s worked for me and I hope it works for you. At the end of the day, it’s all about showing up and showing out.

Have you ever thought about having a radio show? If so, what would you talk about? Let us below!

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