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Success Advice

Why Many People Will Never Achieve Success and How to Make Sure You Do

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Many people think if they could only reach success that their life would somehow be better. They live by “if onlys” (if only I had a better job, if only I had a bigger house, if only I had a different spouse). Even worse, they tie their happiness to this future goal of success, refusing to be happy now, before their goals are reached.

Somehow this magical pinnacle they refer to as success is some far away dream or goal that keeps them mired in the day-to-day smallness that never lets them break out of their unhappiness.

I have also had this way of thinking be a part of my life, but once I realized that it was backwards, my life changed dramatically. I have reached several lofty goals I set for myself. Interestingly, my life was not miraculously different when those dreams became reality. So I wondered, what makes people think an external item in their life will automatically make it better or different?

The Game Is An Inner Game

When we set goals, there is a determination that drives us towards those goals. The motivation is often that our lives will change for the better. This fuels many people to keep going when times get tough to keep going towards the successful achievement of that goal.

In reality, the motivation needs to come from within. It needs to be a burning desire to complete the goal, not for the external satisfaction or rewards it may bring, but for the internal peace and satisfaction that you feel. The gratitude and completeness that you feel even being able to have the opportunity to strive for the goal should be what drives you forward.

“Always be yourself and have faith in yourself. Do not go out and look for a successful personality and try to duplicate it.” – Bruce Lee

Success is Not a Destination

One of the things I noticed about myself was that sometimes when I achieved what I set out to do I often had a feeling of being let down afterwards. This is sometimes referred to as the “day after Christmas” syndrome. This is because there is so much excitement leading up to Christmas day and then once the gifts are opened, the meals are eaten and the guests are gone, we are left with the cleanup and life goes back to normal.

It is the same with achieving certain goals. Let’s say you had a goal to purchase a new car. You’ve worked extra hours, you’ve saved your money, you’ve made sacrifices, dreaming of the day you get to sit in those leather seats. The day finally arrives! You are driving around in your brand new car and  for a little while, it feels great. Then slowly you start to realize your life is still the same. Nothing else has changed. You have the same problems and life issues as before the car came into your life.

Enjoy The Journey Along The Way

The key to achieving true success, and along with it, true happiness, is to actually make the pursuit of the goal the fun part, not reaching the final destination. That’s just the icing on the cake. The planning, the extra work, the challenges, all of the things making up the pursuit are the real success.

How you got there is the ultimate achievement. Live for the here and now. That is the best way to achieve success.

“The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination.” – Carl Rogers

How are you making sure you enjoy the journey while finding a way to reach your destination? Let us know by commenting below!

Image courtesy of Twenty20.com

Debbie Peck known as the Digital Trendsetter. As a Digital Strategist and Certified Social Media Manager she helps companies stay ahead of the curve by creating campaigns that humanize your brand, engage with your ideal audience and increase profits. Check out more on her website http://debbiepeckdigital.com. You can also follow her on Twitter:@debbiempeck.

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Success Advice

The 2-Minute Rule: The Secret to Habit Success

By starting with a small, manageable task, it becomes much easier to build consistency

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It’s a given fact that we all want to build habits, goals that we want to achieve, and things that we want to change in our lives. However, on the other side of the coin, it can be hard to sustain motivation and consistency.  (more…)

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Success Advice

20 Ways You Can Become a Powerful Communicator

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Emile Steenveld Speaker and Coach

Some people seem to naturally know how to effectively communicate in a group setting. They can express themselves clearly and listen attentively without dominating the conversation.

Being a powerful communicator is important for several reasons, including building and maintaining relationships, achieving goals, resolving conflicts, improving productivity, leading and influencing others, advancing in your career, expressing yourself more confidently and authentically, and improving your mental and emotional well-being. Effective communication is an essential life skill that can benefit you in all aspects of your life.

But, don’t worry if you don’t naturally possess this skill, as effective communication is something that can be developed with practice, planning and preparation.
 

1.  Listen actively: Practice active listening by giving your full attention to the speaker and responding to what they are saying.

 

2. Use “I” statements: Speak from your own perspective and avoid placing blame or making accusations.

 

3. Avoid assumptions: Don’t make assumptions about what the other person is thinking or feeling.

 

4. Be clear: Express your thoughts and feelings clearly and concisely by getting to the point and avoid using jargon or overly complex language.

 

5. Show empathy: Show that you understand and care about the other person’s feelings.

 

6. Offer valuable insights: When speaking in a group, provide a valuable takeaway or actionable item that people can walk away with.

 

7. Be an active listener: Listen attentively and respond accordingly, incorporating your points into the conversation.

 

8. Choose the right time: Pick the most opportune time to speak to ensure that you have the group’s attention and can deliver your message without interruption.

 

9. Be the unifying voice: Step in and unify the group’s thoughts to calm down the discussion and insert your point effectively.

 

10. Keep responses concise: Keep responses short and to the point to show respect for others’ time.

 

11. Avoid unnecessary comments: Avoid commenting on everything and only speak when you have something important to say.

 

12. Cut the fluff: Avoid being long-winded and get straight to the point.

 

13. Prepare ahead of time: Sort out your points and practice them before speaking in a group.

 

14. Smile and be positive: Smile and nod along as others speak, to build a positive relationship and be respected when it’s your turn to speak.

 

15. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your own actions and feelings.

 

16. Ask questions: Ask questions to clarify any confusion or misunderstandings.

 

17. Avoid interrupting: Allow the other person to finish speaking without interruption.

 

18. Practice active listening: Repeat what the other person said to ensure you have understood correctly.

 

19. Use your body language too: Use nonverbal cues such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language to convey your message and build rapport.

 

20. Be aware of the tone of your voice: it should be calm and assertive, not aggressive or passive.

 

By keeping these tips in mind, you can improve your communication skills and become a more powerful communicator, which can help you build better relationships, achieve your goals, and lead a more fulfilling life.

I you want to learn how to become more confident in life then you can join my weekly mentorship calls and 40+ online workshops at AweBliss.com so you can master your life with more success.

 
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Success Advice

Dead Men Tell No Tales: How to Navigate a Mutiny as a Leader in 10 Steps

You’re the manager. You’re the supervisor. You’re the leader. But maybe your people don’t see it that way

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You’re the manager. You’re the supervisor. You’re the leader. But maybe your people don’t see it that way and perhaps that has created a divisive and adversarial working environment that makes it difficult for you to influence and inspire your team in a way that meets your vision. (more…)

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Success Advice

How to Think Like a CEO for Your Future Success

A blueprint for CEOs to draw a disciplined strategy

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Image Credit: Unsplash

Strategic thinking helps CEOs build successful businesses. It helps them establish everlasting enterprises. It is one of the key elements of decision-making. It is different from strategic leadership. It differentiates between leaders from managers.  (more…)

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