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The Counterintuitive Reason You’re Spinning Your Wheels in Business

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Whenever you’re looking to reach a goal in your life, especially if that’s building your own business, there’s one piece of advice you hear over and over again. You must have a ‘why’ that keeps you going when things get tough. And that’s good advice…but it’s incomplete. Picking just one why—no matter how compelling it may seem—isn’t enough to carry you through when things get tough. And they are going to get tough (that’s an inevitability!)  Hanging the success of your big dream on one why is setting you on a path to failure.

The Single Why problem

The problem with a single why is that it’s sneaky. It’s not readily apparent that the why you’ve chosen can’t hold up to the stress that comes with being a business owner because the why is incomplete. And let’s be honest—there’s more anxiety and fear in the entrepreneurial journey than anyone realizes before embarking on this path. It’s one of those things that you can’t truly understand until you’ve lived through it.

Most whys are not nearly specific enough. Focusing your why generally on things like financial freedom, becoming a millionaire, or giving your children more than you had can’t hold up to the pressure of the journey. They’re not specific and tangible enough to keep you going when the challenge is so clear and in your face. You must make your why specific. To get specific with your why, paint the scene of the experience with the emotions that will fill you and let yourself really go there in your mind.

A why like this looks like:

  • So I can buy my dream house in the mountains to host Christmas every year for my entire family, baking cookies, going sledding in the backyard, and making sure my parents are surrounded by their grandkids to take more photos than any one human ever needs to commemorate it all.
  • So I can go to the store and buy anything without having to triple check my account, sliding my card at the register with more peace than I would have sitting at the beach.
  • So I can take two hours to myself each morning and focus on my connection to my Higher Power, feel grounded in my body, work out, and feel ready to take on the day before I ever check my phone because there is no one else to answer to. I make the rules.

The more specific you make your why, the more compelling it will be. But you’re not done yet.

Having a compelling why is great—and it’s much stronger than a flat, one-dimensional, wrote-it-in-five-seconds-at-a-conference why. But you actually need more than one why.

“When you know your why, you’ll know your way.” – Michael Hyatt

The Six-dimensional Why

One why is never enough to really create massive change and amazing things in your life. A single why is too flimsy to truly support incredible dreams. And let’s face it, if you’re reading this, chances are your dreams are big, bold, and some may even say a little crazy. The bigger the dream, the more difficult the journey.

That means there will be times that you are so frustrated, anxious, or stressed that your one why can collapse under the pressure. If the pain of now is more compelling than your why, then the pain of now will win over your why every time. That leads to you telling yourself things like:

  • “I want time freedom, but it seems too hard—so just let me get a job.” 
  • “I want to create this for my kids, but right now, I want to sell those kids to a circus.”
  • “I want to publish a book to leave a legacy, but I never seem to have any time. So I may as well pack that dream away.”

The pain of not having your dream must be more excruciating than the pain of accomplishing your goals. That’s why the Six-dimensional why™ will act as your safety net and catch you when things get rough. The Six-dimensional why™ puts the pain of not having what you most desire front and center in your mind to keep you going. Here’s why it works so well.

Having a Six-dimensional why™ means you never have to rely on just one motivational vision. You can clearly see how your goal will impact every area of your life. When one why falls short, the others pick up the slack. The Six Dimensions are:

  • Financial
  • Emotional
  • Mental 
  • Physical
  • Social 
  • Spiritual

These whys might look like:

  • Financial: So I can pay off my student loans in the next three years, and then put all of that money toward an investment account for my kids so that when they graduate college, they’re set up for a successful start. 
  • Emotional: So I can finally walk into a bookstore and see the center display full of my books, watching passersby pick up a copy and carry it with them to the checkout counter. 
  • Mental: So I can hear the ping of my phone without having an anxiety attack and instead feel peaceful and expansive in my life, knowing that the ping I just heard was another sales notification. 
  • Physical: So I can go to my high school reunion wearing my favorite dress and red bottom shoes, hearing people tell me how I’ve barely aged (hair toss). 
  • Social: So I can take my kids and my parents to Disney World twice a year for a week or two at a time, so we can fully take in the experience and eat at Cinderella’s castle instead of hitting up the food carts.
    Spiritual: So I can look back on my life before I die and know that I fulfilled my purpose, doing everything I could to live up to the vision I had for my life.

When you write out your Six-dimensional why™, you should feel the power of it coursing through your body. Each one should evoke an emotion from you that makes you want to get to work on your goals. That way, when the challenges hit you hard, you have something six times stronger than the challenge to meet it with. Crafting the right why makes all the difference in your resilience and success. Take the time to go all-in on your own Six-dimensional why™.

Bevin Farrand is a business strategist, coach, and founder of the Take the DAMN Chance movement, using her over 15 years of experience in personal development, psychology, and communication to support small businesses and entrepreneurs to develop and execute strategies to take their revenue to 6- and 7-figures. Her superpower is helping people bring their big, bold, crazy dreams to life. In 2019, after unexpectedly losing her husband 5 days after they returned from a whirlwind trip to France, Bevin Farrand founded the Take the DAMN Chance movement. Her DAMN framework has inspired hundreds to connect with the people that they love, do the “crazy thing” that makes all the difference and, when given a choice, to take the damn chance. Bevin's genius and insights have been seen on NBC, the Online Marketing Made Easy Podcast, Lessons from a Quitter, and more.

Success Advice

Can Organic Marketing on Facebook Be Effective in 2022?

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As another cat video is served to me in my Reels on Facebook, I am beginning to wonder if this platform can still serve to attract clients to my coaching business. And as the wondering turns into worrying, I feel a pressing need to make some vital changes to what worked for my solopreneur business for half a decade. (more…)

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How to Leverage Your Leadership Style for Business Success

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When we hear that leaders should operate within their zone(s) of genius, it’s easy to think that this only applies to tasks that they excel at. Whilst this is true, the piece of the puzzle that is often overlooked is the positive correlation between a leader’s zone of genius and their leadership style. (more…)

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5 Simple Habits to Live A Less Chaotic, Happier Life

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Many of us spend our daily lives searching for happiness. We jump from one job to another, from one hobby to another, hoping to spark a sense of joy and purpose.

But it’s hard pursuing happiness. After all, life is full of frustration and can put a stopper to our feel-good days.

And it’s challenging to be happy when we are juggling the responsibilities of everyday life like work and relationships. While achieving happiness is arduous, it’s not impossible. Try out these 5 habits to enjoy life more and be happier.

1. Walk in Nature

Spending time in nature has always improved my mood. Taking a walk around my neighborhood park, surrounded by trees and vegetation, I enter a peaceful state of mind.

The worries previously weighing on my mind are suddenly lifted, and I feel an indescribable sense of joy.

Taking just 20 minutes out of my day to get a fresh breath of air is extremely relaxing. 

In our work culture that favors busyness, there is little room for calmness. We associate a busy schedule with how successful we are, which isn’t entirely true at all.

In fact, it might be a disaster in the making. All that stress and anxiety bottled up without an outlet—the outcome is obvious.

So getting in touch with nature is my go-to way of maintaining a proper work-life balance. It makes me energized and ready to blast through the rest of my day with optimism.

2. Smile More Often

I make it a habit to smile every day; they aren’t fake smiles but genuine ones. And they have become a regular part of my life.

What am I smiling at, exactly? It can be the night sky covered with shining stars, like fine quicksand. Or, it can be the flowers sprouting new leaves in spring.

I embrace everything with open arms. Even when I have a rainy day, I don’t let it ruin my momentum.

Regardless of what happens, a simple smile can brighten my day; and best yet, it’s completely free.

At some point, everyone can have a stressful day and feel burned out. So put up a smile. Even if you’re not a positive person, take a firm stance against negativity. Your daily life will surely burst with joy.

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” – Dalai Lama

3. Find Your Passion

Many people dive headfirst into a day job that doesn’t interest them. They do it just for the money, which only makes them more miserable.

People who aren’t attached to their work will find difficulty achieving happiness. They live in a gray and stale world devoid of positivity.

Listen to your heart. Ask yourself: What makes me feel enthusiastic and excited? This is a time to discover your hopes and dreams.

You have endless opportunities in this world. Start a business. Volunteer at a charity drive. Figure out your reason why.

Personally, I used to turn to real estate to earn dependable rental income. But there was no sense of fulfillment. That feeling soon reached a tipping point, which pushed me to re-prioritize everything.

I wanted to make a positive impact on people’s lives. Combining my interest in business and self-improvement, I pursued my passion for blogging. And I can’t be any happier about it.

Everyone needs something that keeps their life meaningful. It can be a source of light that helps us walk in the right direction.

So having goals and dreams makes us genuinely happy. Without them, it will be a long, treacherous journey.

4. Practice Gratitude

Some days we may not feel a shred of gratitude. We are overwhelmed with the hustle and bustle of life where we seek perfection, one that is only full of success and wins.

However, that will only put you further away from happiness.

Take the time every day to pause and appreciate something in your life. What I find helpful is sitting down with a pen and paper.

I start with “I am grateful for…” It can be the appreciation for my afternoon cup of herbal tea. It can be the clear blue sky on a sunny day.

This routine sets up a support system that reinforces positive emotions. It reminds me that there are many things I’ve experienced in life and even more things that I’m grateful for.

Even if I have a bad day, I try my best to be grateful and encourage lasting joy.

So appreciate everything that enters your life—all the good and bad. You will see your mood elevate to an entirely new level.

5. Create Memories With Loved Ones

It can be tempting to focus all our time and energy on reaching valued goals. We say, “I’ll take it easy and spend time with loved ones after I’m successful.”

But what if that time never comes? What if, at some point, your loved ones are suddenly gone?

Don’t wait until it’s too late. Prioritize your loved ones today, not next year. After all, you wouldn’t want to leave any room for regret.

The cherished memories you make now will be a spark of joy. They can even be a source of motivation when shooting for goals.

As social creatures, sharing stories, feelings, and dreams can make us happy and fulfilled.

Living a solitary life is not for everyone. Although having some alone time is perfectly fine, you should still make memorable experiences with those close to you. They will be cherished within your heart for as long as you live.

The quest for lasting happiness can be daunting at times. We spend much of our time searching for it, almost giving up along the way.

But you need to see the bright side. Living a better and happier life isn’t a far-fetched dream; it’s within reach. Remember that happiness can come from the small habits and things you do daily.

If you want to lead the life you truly want, practice these 5 habits and be consistent every day. Don’t give up halfway. Once you do so, there will be nothing stopping you from enjoying life to the fullest.

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Success Advice

Avoid These 12 Mistakes on the Way to Success

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One day when I was writing an interesting article my wife asked me, “Why did you achieve success so late, during the late forties?  Did you ever find out the reasons for your late success?” The question was an interesting one as I seldom thought about why I achieved success so late in my life until then. I thought about this for a while; here are the reasons that come to my mind: (more…)

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