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5 Surprising Ways You’re Sabotaging Your Success



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Everyone’s entitled to having a bad day every now and then. Yet, when a bad day has turned into a bad week, or maybe even a bad month, it’s time to pause and assess, before your leadership reputation is on the line. 

It is critical to be aware of the attitude and energy you exude to be effective and respected in leadership. During times of pressure and stress, the brain defaults to familiar behavior patterns, regardless if the behavior is helpful to the situation. These patterns may be destructive and undetectable until the consequences are blatantly obvious and alarming.

This is self-sabotage at its best, and here are some helpful cues to keep it from getting the best of you.

There are five common self-sabotaging identities that undermine and, in some cases,  hinder future opportunities and successes for some of the most talented executives and entrepreneurs.

The negative behaviors include:

  • Being a complainer. Constantly pointing out what’s going wrong in a situation prevents you from presenting yourself as a problem-solver and expert in the room.
  • Being defensive. Always having an explanation for your actions–even when they’re not working–prevents you from building trust with clients and team members.
  • Being hypercritical. If you’re finding a problem with every solution, you’ll never find a solution to the problem.
  • Being self-deprecating. If you underestimate your ability to handle problems from the start, you’ll hold yourself back from taking on tasks.
  • Being a fatalist. When we give power to the worst case scenario, we can also bring it to fruition and we forget about opportunities for success.

Most people identify with one primary self-sabotaging identity type, and some self-identify in multiple categories. 

Developing awareness of your sabotaging behavior identity is the first step in disrupting the destructive pattern. The next step is to adapt a positive behavior disruptor to replace the current behavior pattern. The hint is to assign a trigger word to the self-sabotaging behavior to activate the new behavior. The trigger word becomes the cue to the new response when the instinct is to begin the self-sabotage pattern.

“Self-doubt does more to sabotage individual potential than all external limitations put together.” – Brian Tracy

Trigger Words to Uplevel Your Success

  • To eliminate the complaining, think ELEVATE. Constant complaining and fixating on the hurdles quickly exacerbates a small problem into a larger problem. Leaders elevate the mindset of others when they reframe challenging circumstances and present possibilities. Elevating the viewpoint of the obstacle offers greater perspective and clarity on the issue and elicits greater morale in achieving a positive outcome.  
  • To stop being defensive, think QUESTION. Defensive behavior prevents clients and team members from feeling seen, heard and acknowledged. Asking a question like, “how did this circumstance impact you?” offers the opportunity to better understand the other perspective to achieve a mutually beneficial resolution.
  • To quit being hypercritical, think FORWARD. Finding a problem with every solution keeps you stuck in the problem, and questions your tenacity to find a solution. Instead of waiting for the perfect solution, commit to trying various solutions until the best possibility is uncovered.
  • To do away with self-deprecation, think EMBRACE. Clients and team members look to you for your unique gifts and inspiration as a leader. Embracing your brilliance means validating your natural talents and strengths so you approach any given problem with confidence. 
  • To defeat the fatalist, think RECALIBRATE. To avoid bringing a worst case scenario to life, envision your brain like a GPS. As each roadblock is detected, direct your thought process to create the detour toward the optimal destination. 

Posting the trigger words in places where you often look provides a visual reminder of the new behavior pattern. Places like – the wallpaper on your phone, a post-it on your computer screen, or hand written at the top of a legal pad are useful places to reinforce the changes you are making. 

Too many executives and entrepreneurs place more value on the amount of work they complete in pursuit of their goals, rather than placing value on the attitude and energy they exude in the process. They find the time to go above and beyond with demonstrating the quality of their work reinforcing the belief that hard work will earn great success. While there is no disputing that hard work is part of the equation, it is critical to recognize it, alone, will only get you so far.

Hard work married with mental strength is the dynamic duo protecting your success from self sabotaging behavior.

Heidi Gruss is a licensed psychotherapist and transformation strategist who specializes in working with burned out entrepreneurs seeking a change in their lives. She brings to her clients two decades of clinical and administrative experience in both private and corporate behavioral health settings. Four of those years were spent running a multi-million-dollar behavioral health program for the state of Connecticut that became a model for the rest of the United States. Through her multi-six figure coaching business, she helps clients rapidly identify and overcome negative patterns of behavior that hold them back from achieving their goals in business, health and life. Heidi’s expertise has been featured in media outlets such as Your Story is Your Legacy, Master Your Mindset With Coach Marc, The Bigger Braver Show, Grow Your Path to Wellness and Victim to Victory. She has also presented to audiences of thousands on virtual and live stages across the United States. She lives in Waterford, Connecticut, with her husband and three children.

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Success Advice

Wealth Lessons Everyone Should Hear for Every Stage of Your Life

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Success Advice

How to Choose the Best Affiliate Programs for Your Blog

If you follow these steps, you can create an affiliate marketing plan that makes money, fits well with your content, and connects with your readers



how to choose the best affiliate programs for your blog

Picking the right affiliate programs for your blog is really important. It can make a big difference in how much money you can make and how much your readers get out of your blog. With so many choices out there, deciding which ones to go with can be tricky. 

This guide is here to make it easier for you. It will give you clear steps and helpful tips to choose affiliate programs that fit well with what your blog is about, what your readers like, and what you stand for. 

For more articles on this theme, please head over to this blog

Understanding Affiliate Marketing

Before you start picking affiliate programs, it’s important to really understand what affiliate marketing is and how it works. 

Basically, affiliate marketing is when you promote a product or service on your blog, and then you get paid a little bit every time someone buys something or does something because you recommended it. 

It’s great for both the person selling the product and the blogger, because the seller gets more sales with low risk, and the blogger can make money from their blog.

How to Choose the Right Affiliate Programs for Your Blog

1. Assess Your Niche and Audience

The key to doing well in affiliate marketing starts with really knowing what your blog is about and who reads it. Consider the following:

  • Your blog’s content: What topics do you cover? Ensure the products or services you promote are relevant.
  • Your audience’s interests and needs: What solutions are they seeking? Choose affiliate programs that offer products or services that solve their problems or enhance their lives.

2. Research Potential Affiliate Programs

Once you know what your blog is about and what your readers want, start looking for affiliate programs. Choose ones that are well-known for good products, great customer service, and helpful support for affiliates. Resources to find these programs include:

  • Affiliate networks like ShareASale, Commission Junction, and ClickBank.
  • Direct searches for “[Your Niche] affiliate programs” in search engines.
  • Recommendations from other bloggers in your niche.

3. Evaluate the Commission Structure

The commission structure is a critical factor to consider. Look for programs that offer competitive rates that make your efforts worthwhile. Consider:

  • The percentage of commission per sale.
  • Whether the program offers a flat rate per action (e.g., per sign-up).
  • The cookie duration, which affects how long after a click you can earn commissions on sales.

4. Consider the Program’s Reputation and Sureness

Join affiliate programs with a solid reputation for quality and sureness. This not only ensures that you’re promoting good products but also that you’ll be paid on time. You can:

  • Read reviews from other affiliates.
  • Check the program’s history and background.
  • Look for any complaints or issues reported online.

5. Analyze the Support and Resources Offered

A good affiliate program gives you things like ads to use, training on their products, and helpful managers. Having access to these resources can really help you do a better job at promoting their products.

6. Understand the Terms and Conditions

Before signing up, thoroughly review the program’s terms and conditions. Pay close attention to:

  • Payment thresholds and methods.
  • Any restrictions on how you can promote their products.
  • The program’s policy on affiliate marketing on social media platforms.

7. Test the Product or Service

If possible, test the product or service before promoting it. This firsthand experience allows you to offer genuine charge and build trust with your audience.

8. Look for Recurring Commission Opportunities

Some affiliate programs pay you again and again for subscriptions or services that charge fees regularly. These can provide a more stable income compared to one-time sales commissions.

Implementing Your Choice

After choosing the best affiliate programs, the next step is to smoothly include your affiliate marketing in your content plan. This includes:

  • Creating valuable content that naturally incorporates affiliate links.
  • Disclosing your affiliate affairs transparently to maintain trust with your audience.
  • Tracking your results to understand what works best for your audience and adjusting your strategy accordingly.

Picking the best affiliate programs for your blog involves careful planning, research, and making sure they match what your audience likes and needs. 

If you follow these steps, you can create an affiliate marketing plan that makes money, fits well with your content, and connects with your readers. 

The real key to doing well with affiliate marketing isn’t just about the products you talk about, but also how much your audience trusts and values your advice. 

With enough time, patience, and hard work, your blog can grow into a successful space that earns a good amount of affiliate money and helps your readers choose the right products.

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Crafting a landing page that converts is both an art and a science



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