Success Advice

Mastering These 5 Communications Skills Will Help You Better Understand Others and Yourself

Published

5 years ago

Jul 24, 2018

Image Credit: Unsplash

How do you show somebody you care? In addition to being present, it’s the words you choose and the way you listen. Strengthening your communication skills gives you the opportunity to build close relationships where there is loyalty, support, and a beautiful balance of understanding. What’s more, as you understand others better, you’re able to gain insight into their reasons behind their thoughts and actions. Knowing what makes someone tick helps you predict and adapt to how he or she will react – for better or worse. Through your communication skills, you’re able to change the course of your conversations. And, by communicating well, you can improve your relationships.

Successful communicators look for patterns. Recurring themes are found when you’re reading between the lines. They know that by listening, they’ll be able to hear what is said and, also, what goes unsaid. This is because as they are listening, they are taking note as to common triggers and preparing for them. They are responding to other’s needs through their messaging and showing thoughtful consideration for their concerns.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by trying to relate better to other people, but feel like you’re not being understood or you’re not being heard, perhaps the reason lies within mutual understanding. This means that you may not be aware of something another person is feeling and by leaving this out, it is affecting your relationship. By not being relevant, your message is off the mark. It doesn’t match what matters to that person. Fortunately, there are ways to improve the way you communicate, but, in order to gain a heightened awareness of yourself and others, it does take work, and an open mind.

If you have been wondering how you can communicate better with others, these 5 skills will help you improve understanding and strengthen your relationships:

1. Framing

It’s all about the packaging! How your message is framed makes a difference when it comes to how others will respond. You’ll need to present your message in a way that is not only simple, but also clear as to what kind of response is expected. Get a feel for how others respond to similar messages beforehand so that way you can adjust if necessary. You can also help others understand your message better through visual cues and body language. Having visuals can supplement what you’re trying to convey by applying emphasis in ways that words cannot.

“All generalizations are false, including this one.” – Mark Twain

2. Mirroring

In order to understand what your audience is looking for or why they are reacting a certain way, the easiest way to investigate is through asking them. But, if you want to get a sense of what they’re thinking and feeling, a less obvious way is through mirroring. When you’re sharing a message, watch for reactions. Pay attention to visual cues and feedback.

Facial expressions and behaviors will show you whether you’re evoking any emotions. Watching for reactions will help you understand where trigger points are — whether positive or negative. Being able to figure out what’s actually reaching others gives you the ability to connect in a way that matters and you’ll know how to get a response.

You can then refine your message by adjusting your tone and the words you choose in order to provide what others are looking for. As you adjust, you’ll be able to test for reactions to see if you’re getting close. Consider why your changes are or are not working and you’ll gain a deeper understanding.

3. Functional Empathy

Empathy is the ability to see something from another person’s point-of-view and consider how they’re feeling (and why). Empathy can range from being able to feel what others feel, to understanding the reasons behind why someone feels the way they do, to relating back to others with shared experiences or thoughts. If you’re looking to communicate better, think about how others are feeling during the flow of your interaction.

By looking at where people are getting distracted or no longer engaging with you, you’ll find out what’s no longer relevant to them. This is where they stop caring. Knowing how to hold attention and avoid a drop-off is especially helpful because you can better plan your conversations, messaging and experiences.

4. Storytelling

By practicing your storytelling skills, you’re able to engage others in a way where they’re interested in hearing more. Through stories, you’re able to share anecdotes, lessons and information in a way that’s easier to connect with. It’s an excellent way to create more connection and share information that is easy-to-relate-to; not to mention, build excitement!

With so much information competing for your audience’s attention, you’ll be able to draw in and hold an audience’s attention. A compelling story can be memorable and inspire others to share their own stories. Through sharing these stories, you’ll be able to build and develop more understanding and insight into other people’s experiences.

“There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself.” – Anthony Rapp

5. Receptive Language

Take note of where the people you’re talking with are coming from. If you’re speaking about one thing, but it’s completely different from what they need, they’ll quickly check out. But by encouraging responses through selective phrasing and questions, you’ll be able to determine if you’re understanding them properly.

If they continue to stay engaged, you’re on the right track when it comes to reflecting their interests. Your language and choice in words can encourage feedback and open-ended responses. These types of responses will help you find out if your audience can relate to what you’re saying. And, using the information you gather will help you determine what resonates best. As you genuinely show you care and take interest in others, you’ll find that others appreciate your interest.

Developing these communication skills will give you the ability to better relate to others, develop more loyalty, and build stronger relationships, all while increasing internal and external awareness and uncovering underlying needs to show you care.

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Naomi Lantzman

Naomi Lantzman is an entrepreneur, as well as an author, speaker, and marketing consultant. She has taught 100+ college courses on marketing and design and loves diving into projects with purpose. Naomi lives in Tampa, FL with her husband and two beautiful children. For more information, visit www.naomilantzman.com.

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How to Break the Cycles of Mediocrity and Manifest Your Greatness

There is no greatness without becoming and there is no becoming with authenticity

Published

3 weeks ago

Nov 16, 2023

Jamelle Sanders

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In just a few weeks, we will be wrapping up 2023. Can you believe it? This year has been absolutely incredible for me.

I have seen amazing doors opened, new relationships formed and I am seeing dreams realized in my life. While this seems like the hallmarks of a great year, this has also been the most challenging year of my life. With all of the change happening in my life, I have been forced out of my comfort zone and challenged to grow in every area of my life.

I can truly say that I have made the most of my moments this year and I have used everything as a catalyst for maximizing my greatest potential.

As a revolutionary leader, I have the pleasure of consulting and advising leaders around the world to fulfill purpose, realize their greatest potential and make an impact.

I want to share some insights with you that will help you to break cycles of mediocrity and manifest your greatness.

Everything legal must come through the matrix

I am sure that some of you are wondering why I am using the term matrix. However, what you have to understand is that I am trying to make a highly complex spiritual principle practical to understand.

Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, every life has an origin and I believe that origin is divine and begins with eternity. You are birthed from eternity and into time to fulfill a unique purpose and assignment in your lifetime and generation.

The matrix is simply the portal or vehicle that brings something out of the invisible realm and into tangible form. The problem with much of the teaching today is that it excludes the matrix. We are told to believe that success is instantaneous and overnight.

Nobody talks about how a dream progresses through stages beginning with visualization and ultimately culminating in manifestation. Without a matrix or portal then everything that you attempt to birth and build will be illegal.

The matrix not only makes you legal but it gives you the authority and power to function as the greatest expression of who you were created to be.

Every matrix has an incubation process

While many people admire and respect me today, I remember a time when nobody knew who I was or the significance of my message. How did I get to where I am today? I got here through an incubation process.

In other words, everything that has been destined for your life is incubating and awaiting a set time of manifestation. The problem is that most people live their entire lives idle and never initiate the incubation process.

What do I meany by that? Most people are living reckless and very few people are living intentionally. I am amazed at the number of people I have conversations with that have no vision, goals or strategies for their lives. They show great promise and they have undeniable potential.

However, without development they will die with their dreams still in them.

Everything that has been destined for your life must be incubated and converted to become realities born to time.

“Visualize this thing that you want, see it, feel it, believe in it. Make your mental blueprint and begin to build.” – Robert Collier

You must give expression to that which is not yet born to time

When you think about a matrix or a prophetic incubation process, you have to understand that potential is often unrealized and untapped. In other words, your potential is in raw form and your potential cannot serve you as long as it is untapped.

The thing that makes me valuable is that I have the ability to convert potential into power. I have done it in my own life and I have empowered leaders around the world to do the same. How do you convert potential into power?

First, it is important to note that you have to perceive potential. If you cannot perceive your potential then you can never cultivate your potential. In addition, you must take the time to cultivate your potential. We often get excited about our capabilities; however, we never expand our capacity in order to realize our greatest potential.

In other words, the strength of your potential is only discovered through your willingness to stretch. The more we are challenged the more we are empowered to expand our capacity for greatness. Most of all, you must begin to express your potential. The expression of potential is different for every person.

For example, the expression of my potential is best demonstrated through the thoughts, ideas, products, services, books, etc.

For another person the expression of potential may look like a screenplay, artwork, sports, scientific discoveries, medical breakthroughs, etc.

Regardless of the form of expression, I know that you will live empty and unfulfilled until you make the decision to express your potential. The expression of your potential gives voice to your dreams, life to your vision, significance to your moments and activates your true power.

You must manifest your greatness

As a revolutionary thinker and leader, my work has impacted people around the world. I am grateful that my life is a source of empowerment to so many people. However, before anyone could ever benefit from my life, I had to make a non-negotiable decision to become who I was born to be.

I wish I could tell you that this journey is easy and that you will get there overnight. However, in a world that celebrates us for doing we are often criticized for being. As a result, I wasted a lot of time trying to be who other people wanted me to be instead of being who I was born to be.

There is no greatness without becoming and there is no becoming with authenticity. It is through our bravery to be vulnerable that we ultimately manifest our greatness. We do not bless the world by being a duplicate. We bless the world when we honor our difference. When you honor your difference you honor your potential.

Ultimately, your difference is how you manifest your greatness.

When you present anything but your authentic self to the world, you are playing small and you are robbing the world of your significance. Manifesting your greatness requires you to master your gifts.