Success Advice
How To Overcome Nervousness – Hollywood’s Best Kept Secret
Nervousness can be used to our advantage or our detriment. It’s a human condition that everyone experiences at some moment in their life. I used to think that being nervous meant I wasn’t good enough at something.
It’s also a condition that can be forgotten about in highly successful individuals or celebrities. As I researched and consumed interviews from these two types of people, I realised that more than 80% of them still get nervous.
What I realised was that they had found ways to be appreciative of their nervousness and to reframe the sensation into a positive experience.
Below are the ten ways to deal with nervousness before any presentation, speech, performance, or business pitch:
1. Be happy you’re out of your comfort zone
Being nervous usually means you’re out of your comfort zone. This is an awesome place to operate your life from, and it will see you excel past your peers. The more you get into this state, the bigger the achievements are that you can obtain in your field of excellence.
From now on, reframe your states of nervousness to be linked to feelings of happiness. Hardwire the feelings of nervousness to your basic human need to grow, and then link all of this to your vision / purpose. By doing this, you will become unstoppable!
2. Remember it’s extra energy so use it for good
Nervousness in my mind is extra energy that can be utilized for good or for evil. It can make you more aware and help boost your senses.
I remember hearing Jessie J say that everyone she knows get’s nervous (including her) and that she has learned over the years to use the energy to help her performance. This is the secret sauce of many pop stars and Hollywood actors.
For some reason, I used to think that these top performers didn’t get nervous because they just magically grew out of it and it went away. This is not true. Some don’t get nervous, but the majority still do.
3. Concentrate on delivering value (not on yourself)
A recurring theme in almost every article I write is the simple power of giving. The reason it’s easy for us to get nervous before a big performance or speech is that we are focusing on ourselves. We are focusing on what the effects are going to be on us and what people might think.
Fundamentally, when we shift away from this default way of operating and make our priority those we serve, our nervousness changes shape.
In blogging, early on, I used to by default focus on how I sounded and what people thought of me. This was a natural human reaction that I did subconsciously even though I knew better. The shift for me happened when I consciously forgot about myself and committed to delivering everything I have with no stone left unturned.
Regardless of how I am perceived, good or bad, my goal is to go above and beyond people’s expectations and to serve an audience. As I took this habit from my blogging to public speaking, I found that a good proportion of my nervousness disappeared.
Instead, my new focus was on trying to teach one new thing, or inspire one person through a new idea, every time I spoke in front of an audience. I still have a long way to go, but public speaking is definitely high on the nervousness radar for many.
When I made the bold move to put my name up in lights in front of tens of thousands of my work colleagues and share my entrepreneur story, I opened the door for unwanted opinions and judgment.
It made me nervous about what could happen. Rather than dwell on all the fearful thoughts I was having, I just had faith in what I stood for and who I’ve become and shared everything I had learned. It’s no surprise that there were 1% of naysayers (expected), and the other 99% were highly supportive.
Dig deep and use your experience to draw out nuggets of gold for those who have given up their time to listen to you. What might seem like a meaningless life lesson to you, could be the one strategy that someone else needs to go on and be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company.
None of your life experience is meaningless, and you should be relentless in sharing it for the benefit of others. Social media makes this so easy to do so you have no excuse not to follow through.
4. Get in the pocket first
Nervousness can often begin at the start of a situation and then once you’re into the flow of delivering your performance – whatever that might be – it goes away. Expect that the first few minutes of a nervous experience might be uncomfortable, and then remember, once you get into delivering your content and you’re in the pocket, the nervousness will subside.
The audience can be a great way to get into the pocket. Use their energy to focus deep on your underlying passion that is driving you to do something that brings on this nervousness.
As you get further through the nervous experience, you will find yourself naturally fall into the pocket. It’s at that moment that your final goal should be to focus on how you can educate or help your audience.
5. Try this mindfulness trick
In a recent sales training session that I completed, I learned a very easy trick that you can use before you go into a nervous situation. What you need to do is before you are due to begin the nervous event, focus on three sounds that you can hear in the environment where you are.
By doing this exercise, you will bring your mind out of your anxious future and back into the present where you can control your experience. Five minutes of an app like “Headspace” or “Calm” can also have a similar effect too.
6. Get into an unstoppable posture
What if you were like the person you aspire to be like and you were unstoppable like them? Well, you can be. The mind is easy to manipulate so all you need to do is mimic the posture of the way this person you’re thinking of would act if they were doing the same activity you are about to do.
Stand tall, believe you are on the same level as this person and hold your head up. Do a few power poses and act as if you have more success than anyone around you. Act as if you are the big shot that you one-day hope to be. You’ll be surprised how this will positively affect your nervousness.
7. Breathe deeply and slowly
When you’re nervous, your breathing typically starts to speed up. This adjustment in breath will only make you feel more nervous and potentially bring on a panic attack.
Take a few deep breaths from your belly, hold each one, and then slowly breathe out. Deep breaths will help relax you and make the nervousness manageable.
8. Don’t let sugar or caffeine take you off course
If you’re already nervous, then caffeine and sugar will only make the issue worse. These two stimulants can play havoc on a nervous mind and make you feel more uneasy. Drinking water before a nervous event is a much better strategy that will keep you hydrated and make your throat moist.
You’ll notice in an office environment that some people sit in their chair and have a hand or leg shaking for extended periods of time. This can often be caused by too much sugar or caffeine. I noticed since giving up both substances that I became much calmer in high pressure, nervous situations.
9. Prepare in advance
Often when we are nervous about a situation, it’s because we haven’t adequately prepared, and our brain knows it. When we know what we are doing back the front, we are less likely to be nervous. So before a big moment where you know you will be nervous, anchor yourself by knowing your content, conversation, or audience really well.
The aim is not to practice so you’re perfect, the aim is to know how the situation is going to play out and have a plan. You can always move away from your plan in the moment, but if you don’t have one, then you set yourself up for disaster.
10. Try a workout
Exercise can be very effective at releasing endorphins that help to relax the body. Prior to a nervous event, you can try and do a forty-five-minute workout to get the blood pumping and take your mind off things.
Many experts claim that exercise is the best-known cure for nervousness so try it for yourself.
“Like most things in life, a positive mindset will get you through any challenge that presents itself”
***Final Thought***
So that’s the basics of how to overcome nervousness. Remember it’s completely natural to be nervous and there is a hidden power in the sensation if you will reframe your mind to look at the condition as positive.
Uncomfortable situations have a lot to do with how you’re thinking about them and less to do with any magical medical condition that you can take a quick fix tablet for.
Wish me luck as I prepare to leave the amateur round of Toastmasters and deliver a highly prepared speech. I’m sure I will be nervous, but I know I’m going to take my own advice and use the energy to motivate me towards my goal to inspire others through entrepreneurship and personal development.
How do you overcome nervousness? Are there any situations where it cripples you? Let me know in the comments section below or on my website timdenning.net and my Facebook.
Success Advice
Signs You’re Ready for a More Purposeful Career
Doing well at something is not the same as wanting it. Plenty of people are steady at their jobs and still feel hollow at the end of the day. Nothing looks wrong from the outside. Colleagues respect you, the pay lands on time, and you handle whatever gets thrown your way. What builds underneath is harder to name.
A dullness sets in, or a restlessness, or the sense that you’re watching your own work from across the room. It doesn’t mean everything needs to be torn down. Often it just means you’ve stopped growing, and once that happens, what counts as worthwhile work quietly changes shape.
When work shifts
There is usually no announcement. One day the tasks that once demanded your full attention take almost nothing out of you. Some people notice their focus sliding away from the work and toward the people around it. Wanting to mentor, listen, and help someone untangle a problem tells you something real about where your attention wants to go.
This lands hard in teaching. Class sizes and schedules leave little room for one student who needs an hour, and administrative work swallows the time you’d rather give them. Many educators respond by shifting from a teacher to a counselor, a role built around emotional and social support instead of lesson plans. The work runs deeper with each student and puts their wellbeing at the center of the day.
Changes like this rarely announce themselves loudly. They start as a small nudge you can brush off. Ignoring it gets harder as the months go by.
What purpose feels like
Most of the time it arrives quietly. A small exchange leaves you feeling like you were actually needed. You break down something complicated and watch it land. You steady someone who was spiraling. You point a person toward a way forward when they couldn’t see one. The tiredness afterward sits differently from the kind that flattens you.
Notice when you feel most switched on. Some people run best on targets, numbers, and systems that click into place. Others come alive guiding, backing someone up, keeping them going. Neither ranks above the other. They simply pull from different places.
Work that feels worthwhile usually reflects what you already care about. Value connection, trust, and steady growth, and a people-centered job will sit better than one measured purely in output. Perfection isn’t the goal. Honesty is.
Clues in your strengths
Patterns show up long before certainty does. Consider what people bring to you without being asked. Do friends start unloading before they’ve taken their coat off? Do colleagues mention how calmly you explain things? Are you the steady one while everyone else scatters like startled pigeons?
Pay attention to that. Support and guidance roles tend to grow out of qualities like these:
- Patience when someone needs time
- Empathy without absorbing everything
- Clear communication
- Real listening
- Steadiness under pressure
- Encouragement that doesn’t take over
Calling these soft undersells them. They carry weight because they help actual people get through difficult stretches. Technical knowledge can be added later. A steady, caring way with people is harder to teach, and having it already puts you closer to a new path than you might assume.
Why helping can grow
Roles built around helping tend to keep demanding more of you as a person. There’s no clocking in and ticking off a list. You get better at hearing what someone isn’t saying, at answering with more care, at reading people accurately. Growth like that outlasts any promotion.
Your motivation changes shape too. Pay and status stop being the whole scoreboard, and impact starts to matter. Did that person feel understood today? Did something hard get lighter because you were there? Questions like those keep the work from going flat.
None of which makes it effortless. The emotional load is real. Boundaries hold everything together, and so does proper rest. Choose a helping career with clear eyes, because meaning doesn’t cover lunch, sleep, or a life outside the job.
Testing the next step
Nothing has to be decided by next Tuesday. Small, low-stakes experiments beat dramatic leaps almost every time. Walk around in the shoes before entering the marathon.
Try a few of these:
- Talk to someone doing the job now
- Ask about ordinary days, not the highlights
- Volunteer somewhere support is the point
- Shadow a professional if you can arrange it
- Sign up for one course
- Note down what leaves you energized
Each one separates the imagined version from the real one. Occasionally a role loses its shine once you hear what the hours involve. Just as often, seeing it up close confirms what you suspected.
Stay curious rather than urgent. No contract is being signed. You’re collecting evidence, and evidence beats panic when a career decision is on the table.
Making change less scary
Fear arrives even when the change is a good one. Money, timing, family obligations, the thought of being a beginner again. None of that is irrational. Your brain is doing its job, protecting you, just with more theatrics than the situation calls for.
Size is usually the problem. “Should I change my whole life” is an unanswerable question, and holding it in your head produces nothing but dread. Narrow it until it becomes something you can act on this month. Build savings first. Find out what training actually requires. Set a six-month window and see what you learn inside it.
The fear rarely disappears entirely, and it doesn’t need to. It shrinks once the decision stops being one enormous leap and becomes a series of ordinary moves you can reverse if they don’t work.
Choosing a better fit
Borrowed definitions of success cause most of the trouble. Looking impressive while feeling depleted is a trade that stops paying off quickly. Your own version asks harder questions. Does this line up with what you care about? Does it draw on what you’re actually good at? Could you do it without performing a version of yourself all day?
Alignment matters more than ambition here. The goal is work that fits, that spends your energy well, that lets you be useful without straining for it.
That pull toward something more meaningful deserves attention rather than dismissal. Look into it. Give it time. The full map isn’t required. One honest step forward is usually enough to start.
Success Advice
How to Prepare for a First Video Conversation Online
A first planned video conversation feels easier when the technical setup and basic expectations are handled in advance. A few practical checks reduce distractions and leave more attention for clear, respectful communication.
Prepare Before the Conversation
Before joining a scheduled conversation through a service such as Aveola, review the meeting details, your account profile, and the subjects you intend to discuss. Early preparation prevents last-minute searches for links, passwords, headphones, or background information.
Confirm the Time and Access
Check the date, time zone, expected duration, and correct access link. Add the appointment to a calendar with a reminder, then open the platform early enough to complete any sign-in or permission requests.
Confirm that your email address or phone number is verified when the service requires account verification. Use a unique password and activate two-factor authentication when that option is available.
Plan a Few Topics
Prepare two or three simple subjects that fit the reason for the conversation. For a professional call, these subjects might include responsibilities, project goals, or next steps. For a social discussion, hobbies, travel, books, music, or daily routines provide comfortable starting points. Avoid writing a full script. Short notes keep the exchange natural while giving you a reference if the discussion pauses.
Check Your Connection
A stable internet connection supports clearer sound and smoother video. Close large downloads, cloud backups, streaming services, and unused browser tabs before joining.
The table identifies common connection issues and practical responses:
|
Issue |
Visible effect |
Preparation step |
|
Weak Wi-Fi signal |
Frozen picture |
Move closer to the router |
|
Busy home network |
Delayed sound |
Pause other high-bandwidth activity |
|
Outdated browser |
Missing features |
Install the current version |
|
Low device power |
Sudden disconnection |
Charge the device beforehand |
Set Up a Comfortable Space
The physical environment affects how clearly both people see and hear each other. Camera placement, light, sound, privacy controls, and personal limits deserve separate attention before the conversation begins.
Position the Camera
Place the camera close to eye level so your face remains centered without requiring you to look sharply upward or downward. A laptop stand, stable box, or adjustable monitor provides a better angle than holding a phone throughout the session.
Leave a small amount of space above your head and keep the lens clean. Look toward the camera while speaking, then return your attention to the screen while listening.
Improve the Lighting
Face a window or place a lamp in front of you, slightly above eye level. Strong light behind your chair creates a silhouette, while overhead lighting alone produces deep shadows around the eyes.
Review the preview screen before joining. Adjust the lamp, curtain, or seat position until facial details appear clear without excessive brightness.
Test the Sound
Use the platform preview or device settings to test the microphone and speakers. Speak at a normal volume and listen for echo, background noise, or distortion. Headphones reduce feedback when speakers sit close to the microphone. A quiet room with curtains, rugs, or soft furniture also limits reflected sound.
Protect Your Privacy
Review what the camera reveals before the conversation begins. Remove documents, photographs, screens, packages, or personal items that display sensitive information.
Five additional checks help protect your account and surroundings:
- Disable location details that are unnecessary for the session.
- Review camera and microphone permissions in the browser.
- Use a background blur when the room contains private material.
- Keep account recovery codes outside shared devices.
- Sign out after using a borrowed computer or tablet.
Privacy settings also control profile visibility, notifications, and contact options. Read each setting carefully instead of relying on its default value.
Set Personal Boundaries
Decide in advance which subjects and personal details remain outside the discussion. A planned conversation does not require sharing an address, workplace schedule, financial information, private documents, or account credentials.
Set a clear time limit when your schedule requires one. A simple statement at the beginning, such as having 30 minutes available, gives both participants a shared expectation.
Keep the Conversation Comfortable
Preparation continues during the exchange through attentive communication and a calm response to technical interruptions. A small problem with sound or video does not need to disrupt the entire session.
Communicate Respectfully
Speak clearly, allow the other person to finish, and ask direct questions when something is unclear. Muting the microphone during unavoidable background noise keeps the conversation easier to follow. Consent remains relevant throughout live communication. Respect a request to change the topic, pause, disable a feature, or end the session.
Finish With Clear Next Steps
Before leaving, confirm any agreed action, future date, document, or contact method. This step prevents confusion after professional, educational, or project-related discussions.
End the session through the platform controls, close unnecessary tabs, and verify that the camera and microphone are no longer active. A brief review of what worked gives you a stronger routine for the next conversation.
Success Advice
The Success Trap of Waiting Until Something Feels Wrong
After enough years in medicine, you start to notice a pattern that has nothing to do with biology and everything to do with psychology. The most driven, capable people in the room are often the last ones to deal with a problem.
Not because they are careless. Usually it’s the opposite. They have built successful lives by pushing through discomfort, solving problems, and staying in motion when other people stop.
I still think about one patient from time to time, although the truth is I’ve seen versions of her story more times than I could count. She was building a company, or maybe it was her career, I don’t remember anymore, and she’d been ignoring a symptom for months. She knew it wasn’t normal. She’d caught it early, but there was always a reason to put it off. A launch, a deadline, an important meeting she couldn’t miss. In her mind, stopping even for a day felt like falling behind.
By the time she finally came in, the problem had grown into something much harder to treat than it needed to be. I never thought of her as careless, and I don’t think denial is the right word either. She was doing what had always worked for her: keep pushing, don’t get distracted by small problems, and deal with them later.
That habit that serves you so well at work doesn’t always serve you everywhere else. When it comes to your health, it can become part of the problem.
Why Ignoring Small Problems Feels Like Discipline
People who accomplish a lot usually learn early on that not every ache, inconvenience, or setback deserves their attention. If they stopped every time something felt a little off, they’d never get anything done. After a while, pushing through just becomes second nature, and that habit doesn’t stay at work. It follows them everywhere else.
The problem is that this instinct doesn’t know the difference between grit and denial. Grit is choosing to endure something hard that you understand and have decided is worth enduring. Denial is ignoring a signal you never actually evaluated. They can feel identical in the moment, which is exactly why so many capable people confuse them.
This happens constantly, and not just when it comes to personal health. A founder notices the same customer complaints showing up every month, but keeps writing them off because fixing them would mean admitting there’s a problem with the product. An executive is surviving on four hours of sleep because it’s “just a busy season,” even though that season has lasted the better part of a year. Someone else has been living with the same symptom for months because making an appointment feels like one more thing they don’t have time for.
None of them are being careless. They’re using the same mindset that helps them succeed at work in a situation where it just doesn’t fit.
The Hidden Cost of Living Reactively
The real cost of reactive living isn’t the eventual crisis. It’s everything that happens before the crisis, which is usually invisible even to the person paying for it.
Living reactively means a portion of your attention is always spent managing something you haven’t dealt with yet. That’s a tax you pay daily, in the form of decisions made from a place of low-grade dread instead of clarity, in the form of energy that should be going toward your best work instead going toward keeping a problem contained. You don’t usually notice this tax because it doesn’t announce itself. It just quietly reduces how much of you is available for the things that matter.
This pattern plays out with health the same way it does in business. Very few of the serious conditions I’ve treated appeared overnight. Most started small, were easy to dismiss, and stayed that way for longer than people expected. Your body usually gives you plenty of chances to notice something is wrong before it forces you to pay attention.
Prevention Is the Highest Leverage Work You’ll Ever Do
Meanwhile, we celebrate the comeback, the turnaround, the crisis survived. Nobody publishes a book about the disaster that never happened because someone handled it early.
But prevention is the harder, more advanced skill. Crisis response gets you sympathy and a story. Prevention requires you to act on something before it’s demanding your attention, with no audience and no applause, purely because you understand what will happen if you don’t. That takes a kind of self-management that most people never develop, because it isn’t rewarded the way heroics are.
The best leaders and founders don’t actually handle crises better than everyone else, they just have fewer of them because they treat maintenance as a strategy rather than as something to get to eventually. They ask what a version of themselves with more information would already know, and then they go find that information instead of waiting for it to force its way in.
What This Looks Like in Practice
If any of this sounds familiar, you don’t need to turn your life upside down. Start small. Every few months, take a little time to think about the things you’ve been putting up with instead of dealing with. It could be your health, something at work, your finances, or even a relationship that’s been quietly wearing you down.
The most useful question to ask yourself is a simple one: Am I choosing to put up with this, or am I just avoiding it? Those two things can feel surprisingly similar when you’re in the middle of them, but they aren’t the same. One is intentional. The other usually catches up with you sooner or later.
A Different Definition of Strength
We tend to define strength as the ability to endure. I’d argue the more useful definition is the ability to notice early and act before you have to endure anything at all.
The people I’ve seen build businesses, careers, and even healthy lives over the long term usually aren’t the ones who can take the biggest hit. More often than not, they’re the ones who dealt with small problems before those problems had a chance to grow. It isn’t the most exciting approach or the one that tells the grandest story, but it’s the reason they stay healthy and keep moving forward.
Next time you brush off a small warning sign, ask yourself why you’re ignoring your body’s signals. Most of the time, you’ll likely find that it has less to do with your schedule and more to do with clinging to the identity of being someone who never needs to slow down.
Success Advice
How Teams Create Their Own Legacy Systems and How to Leave Them Behind
Legacy systems are not only old software left by someone else. Many teams create their own legacy after a fast launch. The product still works, but every change takes longer. People work hard, and delivery still slows down.This article explains how that happens, how to spot it, and how to plan a rewrite without stopping the business.
What a Legacy System Looks Like in Practice
A legacy system is software that costs more to change than it should. Age is not the main test. The real test is whether the team can still deliver at a normal pace.
Common signs are practical. The tech stack is hard for the current team to work with. Unused parts of the product stay in place because nobody is sure what will break. Tests exist, but they do not catch real problems. Only a few people understand how the system works. Small features take several sprints, and the team spends more time fighting the system than improving the product.
When effort goes up and output goes down, the system has become legacy for your team.
How a Fast Start Turns Into Legacy
Many teams do not inherit legacy. They create it while trying to move fast.
A common path looks like this. You need users quickly, so you build on an existing solution instead of starting from scratch. In the first months, that works. You ship. You get feedback. The decision looks smart.
Later, the same decision slows you down. The base system was not built for your roadmap, your team’s skills, or your quality needs. What helped you launch now blocks simple changes.Teams often stay with that base too long because the early result was real. Rewriting feels like throwing away progress. So they keep the old foundation even after it stops helping.
Why Teams Keep Patching
Most teams do not decide to live with legacy. They decide to make one more fix.
A patch looks cheaper and safer than a rewrite. It also avoids a hard discussion about stopping work on the current system. For a while, that can be the right call.
After a point, patches add more complexity than they remove. Each fix creates new constraints. The team spends its best time keeping the old system stable instead of building useful product work.
One clear signal is when a basic feature can no longer reach production in a normal cycle. There may be no major outage. There is just steady delay. At that point, the choice is usually simple: keep paying the cost of the current system, or test a rewrite under clear rules. If delivery has already stalled, some teams also need help to stabilize a software project before the next big decision.
Treat a Rewrite as an Experiment
A full rewrite can fail if it has no limits. Some rewrites never reach users and waste months. That risk is real. Staying in legacy forever has a cost too.
A better approach is to treat the rewrite as an experiment. Set a clear scope for the first version. Review progress every week with demos people can see. Track how much work actually gets finished, not only how busy the team looks. Keep the old system running until the new one is ready. Do not freeze the business while the team rebuilds in private.
This makes the decision easier to manage. Stakeholders can judge real progress. If pace and quality improve, continue. If not, stop before the rewrite becomes its own long project with no end date.
Describe the Product You Want Before You Rebuild
Many rewrite projects fail because the team copies the old system as it is.
Legacy code shows how the product works today. It does not always show why a feature exists, or which parts are leftovers from old decisions. If you rebuild only from the old code, you may also rebuild old bugs and unused paths.
A clearer method is to describe the product you want first. Who uses it. What should happen. What you will leave out. Write that down so business and engineering share the same scope. Then decide how to build it.
This matters even more when teams can generate code quickly. Fast output without a clear product description can create a new legacy system sooner. Speed helps only when the goal is clear and shared.
Keep the Old System Running Until the New One Is Ready
Leaving a legacy system does not mean turning it off on day one. Customers still need a working product.Keep the old system live while the new one is built and checked. Release small pieces that prove the new system works. Review quality and pace often. Switch when the new product can support real use, not when the plan looks good on paper.
The goal is a clean handoff, not a dramatic shutdown.
Conclusion
Legacy is not only software you inherit. It is often software your own fast start created.If the team is busy and delivery keeps slowing down, do not assume another patch will solve it. Look at the cost of staying. If a rewrite makes sense, run it as a short, visible experiment. Describe the product you want. Keep the old system online until the new one can take over.
The useful skill is noticing when the system that once helped you launch now blocks progress, and changing course before that cost gets worse.
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