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Success Advice

How Accepting Defeat Led To Two Gold Medals

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medals of success to win in life defeat

If you’ve ever stepped up and gone after a goal you’ll know what I’m talking about.

That feeling when all you can do is HOPE….

You’ve done all the preparation.

You’ve sacrificed.

You’ve worked.

You’ve planned.

And now, everything lies in the balance for whatever happens in the next 90 seconds.

It happens a lot in sports.

But even more in business… far more often than you perhaps realise.

 

The Most *Powerful* Lessons Happen When You Compete

For me it happened a few weekends ago. It was in the hours before I stepped on the mats of a Tae Kwando tournament.

I’d prepared and planned for months: eating, training, getting out for a run when all I really wanted to do was snuggle up in front of the telly; the sparring practice, the bruises, the injuries, the pain….

I had paid my dues.

Now it was crunch time.

And normally I would have been fairly confident… expect, I saw my opponent – and knew I was beaten before I even stepped out on the mat.

 

Winning And Losing Happens In The Mind First

Here’s what happened…

I had hours of waiting around between realising who I was going to have to fight at some point and actually getting to the fight: hours of knowing deep-down that I was already beaten. I know all the theory about “believing” that you can win even against the odds. But these weren’t odds. I was facing a cold, hard reality.

I bet you’ve had times like this too…

So I pulled out all my best mind-programming knowledge and exercises, and set to work grappling with myself to find the way to cast this that would allow me to do a few things (in order of priority), namely:

  1. win,
  2. avoid injury and
  3. get through it with the least amount of emotional discomfort…

I set to work. After all – this is what I teach when I’m helping business owners to get their inner game right for business.

I tried emotional clearing.

I used belief clearing.

I tried visualisation.

None of it seemed to be scratching the surface.

Anyway, after several hours of mental gymnastics I figured – why don’t I just accept that I’m not going to win, and focus on getting the points and staying relatively safe?

After all, I’d been visualising two gold medals for months – a bit more work on that in the last few hours isn’t going to make much difference, right.

So I did.

 

I Accepted Defeat

I let go of all desire to win… and focussed just on getting my head in the sport for the enjoyment of it.

“After all, it’s 90 seconds of kicking and punching. I can do that – so why worry about anything else” I mused. I might even enjoy it 😉

I started to play the sport…

Well, the result was that I did get beaten in that one fight… but I didn’t do badly. In fact, after the fight, she and another girl the same size and ability asked me to join tag team with them… where three of us would take on another team of three.

Long story short, we went on to annihilate another two tag teams, and won the gold in the tag team division.

Adding in the gold medal I had won that morning for my pattern (a sequence of movements we have to perform to demonstrate strength and technique)… I ended up taking home two gold medals.

This was the exact thing I’d been training for and visualising for months: TWO GOLD MEDALS.

Mission accomplished.

 

The Lesson

Sometimes there are deviations in the plan which mean course-correction.

Sometimes you get your ass kicked.

Sometimes things go wrong and you don’t know how you’re going to possibly get the result you need.

Mental gymnastics and emotional work, and laying intentions does work… if you do it far enough in advance.

But when you’re in the heat of the moment, the best thing you can do, as I proved to myself, is to let go and trust the work you’ve done up to that point. Accept whatever comes up, stay in the moment, keep your head in the game, and you will prevail.

I accepted that I was going to have to fight someone who would probably beat me. I let go of trying to “think positively” and worked with what was in front of me. My outcome for that tournament was two gold medals… which was exactly what I got – despite losing a fight, and despite it not being exactly as I had expected.

Focus on the outcome.

Put your power there. And don’t worry about the *how*.

 

You can have everything you choose to have.

To your success!

Laura Leigh Clarke

Laura Leigh Clarke is the unorthodox Business Coach, Recovering Quantum Physicist, Founder of ProsperityQM, Geek and a die-hard Doctor Who fan. She also helps people clear their money blocks and limiting beliefs so they can manifest the life and business they really want. Download Your Tool Kit for Making a Quantum Shift in Your Business, and watch your results explode!

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Success Advice

20 Ways You Can Become a Powerful Communicator

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Emile Steenveld Speaker and Coach

Some people seem to naturally know how to effectively communicate in a group setting. They can express themselves clearly and listen attentively without dominating the conversation.

Being a powerful communicator is important for several reasons, including building and maintaining relationships, achieving goals, resolving conflicts, improving productivity, leading and influencing others, advancing in your career, expressing yourself more confidently and authentically, and improving your mental and emotional well-being. Effective communication is an essential life skill that can benefit you in all aspects of your life.

But, don’t worry if you don’t naturally possess this skill, as effective communication is something that can be developed with practice, planning and preparation.
 

1.  Listen actively: Practice active listening by giving your full attention to the speaker and responding to what they are saying.

 

2. Use “I” statements: Speak from your own perspective and avoid placing blame or making accusations.

 

3. Avoid assumptions: Don’t make assumptions about what the other person is thinking or feeling.

 

4. Be clear: Express your thoughts and feelings clearly and concisely by getting to the point and avoid using jargon or overly complex language.

 

5. Show empathy: Show that you understand and care about the other person’s feelings.

 

6. Offer valuable insights: When speaking in a group, provide a valuable takeaway or actionable item that people can walk away with.

 

7. Be an active listener: Listen attentively and respond accordingly, incorporating your points into the conversation.

 

8. Choose the right time: Pick the most opportune time to speak to ensure that you have the group’s attention and can deliver your message without interruption.

 

9. Be the unifying voice: Step in and unify the group’s thoughts to calm down the discussion and insert your point effectively.

 

10. Keep responses concise: Keep responses short and to the point to show respect for others’ time.

 

11. Avoid unnecessary comments: Avoid commenting on everything and only speak when you have something important to say.

 

12. Cut the fluff: Avoid being long-winded and get straight to the point.

 

13. Prepare ahead of time: Sort out your points and practice them before speaking in a group.

 

14. Smile and be positive: Smile and nod along as others speak, to build a positive relationship and be respected when it’s your turn to speak.

 

15. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your own actions and feelings.

 

16. Ask questions: Ask questions to clarify any confusion or misunderstandings.

 

17. Avoid interrupting: Allow the other person to finish speaking without interruption.

 

18. Practice active listening: Repeat what the other person said to ensure you have understood correctly.

 

19. Use your body language too: Use nonverbal cues such as eye contact, facial expressions, and body language to convey your message and build rapport.

 

20. Be aware of the tone of your voice: it should be calm and assertive, not aggressive or passive.

 

By keeping these tips in mind, you can improve your communication skills and become a more powerful communicator, which can help you build better relationships, achieve your goals, and lead a more fulfilling life.

I you want to learn how to become more confident in life then you can join my weekly mentorship calls and 40+ online workshops at AweBliss.com so you can master your life with more success.

 
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Success Advice

Dead Men Tell No Tales: How to Navigate a Mutiny as a Leader in 10 Steps

You’re the manager. You’re the supervisor. You’re the leader. But maybe your people don’t see it that way

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You’re the manager. You’re the supervisor. You’re the leader. But maybe your people don’t see it that way and perhaps that has created a divisive and adversarial working environment that makes it difficult for you to influence and inspire your team in a way that meets your vision. (more…)

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Success Advice

How to Think Like a CEO for Your Future Success

A blueprint for CEOs to draw a disciplined strategy

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Strategic thinking helps CEOs build successful businesses. It helps them establish everlasting enterprises. It is one of the key elements of decision-making. It is different from strategic leadership. It differentiates between leaders from managers.  (more…)

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How to Focus Your Mind on Your Goals in 2023 Constructively

In this world of distractions due to information overload, it has become a big challenge to focus our minds

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In this world of distractions due to information overload, it has become a big challenge to focus our minds on positive aspects and constructive activities. Sometimes we waste our precious time mentally and physically due to distractions arising out of technology. We must understand our priorities and learn how to focus on them religiously. (more…)

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