Chasing your dreams.
The subject of thousands of books, movies and songs. Everybody has one.
They manifest when you’re a child, before the burden of responsibility and worldly problems are cast upon your shoulders. We dream of the stars, of the great big world, of making a difference.
You can tell when someone is talking about their dreams because there is always an unsatisfied fire in their eyes. It’s something you can’t hide.
It’s different now. There is a sickness in the world and it is called mediocrity. I know, because I was sick with it for a very long time.
When I was little, I wrote.
In school, I relished every opportunity to write that came across my desk, and I remember when I told my friends, my teachers, and my parents that I wanted to write, they’d all say the same thing: “Go for it!”
They told me to grow up. They told me writing would never feed my family or pay my bills. When we grew older, they asked us what we wanted to be, then told us what not to be.
We were told that we must become what we are not, sacrifice who we are to embrace the identity that society wants to give us.
“Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
As we grew up, our dreams were lassoed back to Earth and when we said we wanted to explore the stars as astronauts or wrestle alligators, they’d tell us: “Choose something realistic.”
When did we give up on our dreams? Don’t fall into the hype.
There are a few simple and effective steps that you can follow that can help you from falling into the same rut that I and many others have fallen into:
1. Realize what it is that you were put here to do
Remove money from the equation and ponder for a moment what it is that you would love to wake up to and go to every morning.
2. Figure out how you can turn that into a career
Whatever it is that you love to do, there is a very good chance that you can make money doing it.
You have to go after your dream like your life depends on it, because it does.
Condemning yourself to security and a nine to five is the easy route.
It’s the route that most people will take, either because they don’t realize how to pursue their dreams or they’re too afraid to go after it.
Do not become one of these people.
3. Take the first step
Don’t quit your job. Don’t move across the nation, but make moves that will take you closer to your dream.
Whether it’s reading a new book on how to start a new business, or take a class that will get you closer to the degree that you need.
You need to make every single day an effective day of action.
“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” – George Eliot
Write these three steps down. Look at them every day. Remember them, memorize them, and live them. Don’t buy into the hype. Whatever your dream is, you can have it.
To end my article, I am going to tell a short story that gives an example of everything I have discussed.
I have this friend, and he has a position in retail management. He’s climbing, albeit slowly, the corporate ladder to an inevitable six figure income, a 401k, and a house bigger than he’ll ever need in his life. But this isn’t his dream. Not even close.
He’s a fitness freak. He lives in the gym, and he aspires to open his own gym one day and help others reach their own fitness goals. It’s one of those back of the napkin ideas but when he talks about it there is a fire in his eyes.
The part that saddens me is that he will work his way up the corporate chain, most likely get married, have children, and drag that idea to his grave.
How many other unrealized ideas, half-finished inventions, and great works are in the cemetery, given up on before they were fully pursued?
You have one chance. You have one shot here in this world, and I’m here to tell you, no matter what dream you have, you can do it. When you dream big, most people will react negatively because chances are they aren’t chasing their own dreams.
Remember this, if nothing else, if you try and fail, you will live your life knowing that you gave it everything and more. If you never try, it will be a mistake that will hang in the air for the rest of your life
I’m chasing my dreams. Now it’s your turn.
How to Stay Motivated to Achieve Your Goals
Time is the raw material of our lives. How we choose to spend it, shapes our life accordingly. So having the motivation to spend it on achieving goals is crucial to creating a life we want.
What is Motivation?
The Oxford dictionary defines motivation as the desire or willingness to do something – our drive to take action.
Scientifically, motivation has its roots in the dopamine pathways of our brains. When we do something that feels good, that’s dopamine kicking in. Our actions are driven by the desire for that reward (the good feeling).
Author Steven Pressfield describes motivation more practically. He says we hit a point where the pain of not doing something becomes greater than the pain of doing it. He sees motivation as crossing the threshold where it’s easier to take action than it is to be idle. Like choosing to feel awkward while making sales calls over feeling disappointed about a diminishing bank account.
However you choose to think about it, we all want to harness motivation to achieve our goals.
How to Get Motivated
James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, says that most people misunderstand motivation. They think that motivation is what gets us to take action. In reality, motivation is often the result of action, not the cause of it. Once we start a task, it’s easier to continue making progress. Like Isaac Newton’s first law: objects in motion stay in motion.
This means most of the resistance when working on your goals comes right before we start. Since motivation naturally occurs after we start, we need to focus on making starting easier.
4 Ways to Make Starting Easier
1. Schedule it
One reason people can’t get started on things is that they haven’t planned when to do it.
When things aren’t scheduled it’s easier for them to fall by the wayside. You’ll end up hoping motivation falls in your lap or hoping that you’ll muster enough willpower to get it done.
An article in the Guardian said, “If you waste resources trying to decide when or where to work, you’ll impede your capacity to do the work.”
2. Measure something
It’s easy to feel uninspired when you don’t know if you’re making progress or what you’re even working towards. That’s why you need to make your success measurable in some way. Starting is easy when you know exactly how much closer your current actions will bring you to achieving your goal.
3. Extrinsic motivation
This type of motivation is from external factors. It can be either positive or negative. Positive motivation consists of incentives like money, prizes, and grades. Negative motivation consists of deterrents like being fired, having a fight, or being fined. Extrinsic motivation doesn’t work effectively long-term, but it can work well in the short term to get you started on something.
4. Make it public
Keep yourself accountable by telling friends and family your goals, or even sharing them on social media. This makes it easier to start something because you’re pressured to not let others down.
How to Stay Motivated Long Term
When we say we want to feel motivated to do something, we don’t want to be pushed or guilted into doing a task. We want to be so attracted and drawn to the idea that we can’t resist not taking action. That’s why it’s important to build a foundation that will set you up for consistency.
These are 5 techniques that will help you do just that:
1. Stay in your goldilocks zone
The goldilocks zone is when a task is the perfect level of difficulty—not too hard and not too easy. In this zone, we reach peak motivation and focus.
For example, let’s say you’re playing a serious tennis match against a 4-year-old. On this level of difficulty, you’ll quickly become bored and not want to play. Now let’s say you’re playing a serious tennis match against Serena Williams. On this level of difficulty, you’ll quickly become demotivated because the match is too challenging.
The Goldilocks zone is in the middle of that spectrum. You want to face someone with equal skill as you. That way you have a chance to win, but you have to focus and try for it. Adjusting your workload and goals over time to stay within your Goldilocks zone keeps you engaged and motivated long-term.
2. Pursue intrinsically motivated goals
Being intrinsically motivated to achieve a goal is when you want to achieve it for what it is. There are no external factors like a reward or the risk of being fired. The drive behind your actions is coming from within.
For most intrinsic goals we pursue them because they will enrich our lives or bring us closer to fulfillment. That makes these goals extremely sustainable long-term because they directly affect our quality of life and the things we care about.
3. Use “chunking”
Chunking is the technique of breaking down a goal into smaller short-term targets. By doing this you achieve multiple successes in your pursuit of the main goal. This triggers the brain’s reward system and drives you to keep going.
Traditionally, you may set a goal that you expect to achieve in one year. That’s a long time to commit without seeing any results along the way. By chunking your goals into monthly or quarterly targets, you get the consistent positive reinforcement you need to stay motivated long-term.
For example, instead of trying to lose 50 pounds in one year, try to lose 4 pounds every month for 12 months.
4. Be flexible
We’re all victims of circumstance. Things happen along our journey that we can either adjust to or quit because of. That’s why it’s important to have leeway and flexibility when you’re pursuing a goal. If you expect everything to go perfectly, the inevitable failure can make you disengaged and desireless. When you plan for things to go wrong, you make sure you can keep up for the long haul.
5. Pursue your goals in a sustainable fashion
Don’t lose hope when you’re not an overnight success. Overnight successes are the 1%—for the most part, they don’t exist. What we see as an “overnight success” is actually countless hours of work behind the scenes finally hitting a tipping point. Pursuing goals is a story of patience, persistence, and unseen effort.
Don’t compare yourself to others. Comparison is a recipe for a drop in self-confidence and satisfaction. It also cultivates a mindset where you think you haven’t done enough. As a result, you may raise your expectations and put more pressure on yourself.
This is pointless because things worth achieving take time. So we obviously won’t compare to the things around us when starting.
Mastering motivation is a superpower. With that ability at your fingertips, you can accomplish your goals and shape a life you want to live in.
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