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Why Negative Publicity Is A Blessing In Disguise

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Dealing With Negative Publicity

When a load of negative publicity comes your way unexpectedly, it can be difficult to know what to do. In the midst of an online crisis I always recommend doing nothing at all initially. This happened to be a fortnight ago when I posted my very first article on Entrepreneur.com

The article was all about the barriers standing between you and owning a Ferrari. The Ferrari was really only a metaphor for success, and I wasn’t trying to outline how actually to own one. When I submitted the article to the editor for review, they posted the article with a feature image of a Bugatti car instead of a Ferrari.

bugatti-car-successIt’s not uncommon on well-established websites for them to be very careful about what photos they use and where they come from because the risk of getting sued is far greater. After first seeing my article go live, I was disappointed in the photo they used, but it wasn’t the end of the world.

For the next two weeks, all of my social media channels and my personal email were inundated with negative people hurling abuse at me for not knowing the difference between different types of luxury cars. Now sorrrrryyyy that luxury cars are not at the top of my priority list.

I’m more interested in how to change the world than I am about a chunk of metal, with four wheels, which has some fake badge stuck on with glue, that was made by a factory worker in a third world country, who probably earns significantly lower than the average person.

Keep reading because what seems like a sad story turns into something quite unexpected.

Now that the abuse has died down, I thought it would be cool to share with you the 6 reasons why negative publicity like this is a blessing in disguise:

 

1. You amplify your impact tenfold

Negative publicity amplifies your impact tenfold because our society is programmed to consume bad news. Every TV station you turn on, newspaper you pick up, and any online publication you read will have tons of negative stories present because bad news, and hype sells.

Seeing someone worse off than ourself helps ease the pain of our own life. What the groups of negative nancies don’t understand is that by banding together to bring someone down, they are increasing the number of eyeballs that are paying attention.

People are more likely to hear your message when there is something controversial or messed up with the story. My article with the wrong picture caused exactly this sensation, and it helped me to reach out to more people including some that did resonate with what I was saying.

Some of my newest followers on social media may never have found me if it wasn’t for the beautiful, compounding effect that is negative publicity.

 

2. True friends come to the rescue

It’s cool how during the toughest of times our true friends come through for us. Many of my closest friends contacted me with words of encouragement and one of them even told me to write this article! My friends supported me whether I was right or wrong and they went on social media to respond to some of the messages.

After this negative experience with Entrepreneur.com, I was thinking to myself that I might not write for them again. My friends told me not to let one bad experience with a publication stop me from pursuing my dream.

These words of encouragement helped me see through the short-term disappointment and get back to why I was writing in the first place. Everyone messes up at some stage or another, and I don’t believe for a second that the editor put up the wrong photo on purpose.

I feel like it was almost divine intervention that my first article could have this happen, allowing it to get so much more attention.

 

3. You realise all the people that you want nothing to do with

The people that trashed my name on social media did me a favor because they showed me that they are not the sort of person I want to interact with. Anyone who gets joy out of bringing others down is off my Christmas shopping list and doesn’t deserve even five seconds of my time.

On the other hand, anyone who spends their entire life raising consciousness to a higher level through inspiration and a positive message deserves all of our attention. It’s these people that go on to fly rockets into space, build electric cars that are better for the environment, break world records in sport, inspire us through their hobby, and challenge the status quo.

 

4. You see your true fans shine through

Through the negative publicity, I saw who my real fans were because they didn’t care less about the mistaken photo; all they cared about was the message I was trying to deliver. Instead of being shallow and automatically assuming the worse, they had faith in me and my intentions.

Some of those fans have now become close friends, and that would have never occurred without all of this negative publicity.

“It’s through the struggle that you find your true tribe”

 

5. You’re reminded you are not perfect and never will be

I’ve got a confession to make: I’m not perfect, and neither are you. We’re going to make mistakes every day and the words I’m typing are probably wrong in some way too. That’s right; I got an email during the week to inform me that my grammar is terrible, and I can’t write to save myself.

In this scenario, I asked the person for evidence, and the examples that she sent to me were so minute they weren’t even worth mentioning. They were the type of grammatical errors that only elite writers who have had a New York Times Best Selling book might pick up.

Am I Perfect Now?The quality of your work is always going to be subjective, and people’s standards of what is acceptable will vary greatly. I wish I was amazing at English and could write every sentence perfectly, but the fact of the matter is I can’t.

What am I supposed to do? Never try? No, I’m supposed to just get started and have a crack. Over time my writing will improve, and my message will become more succinct. We’re never going to be all things to all people so let’s abolish this mythical idea and get back to our own personal why.

It’s my why that has got me here in the first place ranting and raving like a madman, and it’s your why that is going to get you out of bed at 4am to pursue your passion and never give up on your dream. Take action and don’t get lost in negative people’s opinions.

In your own life, dish out encouragement and positive criticism rather than verbal diarrhoea. Live your life and don’t become too obsessed with everyone else’s.

 

6. You become immune

As Julia Gillard, the former Prime Minister of Australia said to me a few months ago, “this isn’t my first Rodeo.” If you have been reading my articles for a while, you would know that this is not the first time this has happened.

Guess what? When you put yourself out there, people are going to hate on you no matter what you are doing. Get used to it and expect criticism! The good news is that the more you have negative publicity, the better you get at dealing with it.

In fact, in my case, I have become immune to it. I’ve stopped caring about what people think, and I’m 100% focused on delivering inspiration through personal development and entrepreneurship. The insults just bounce off me because I know that there is no energy behind them that can assist me in breaking through the barriers of my own struggle every day.

Like a virus, the more times I become infected, the better I get at dealing with the symptoms. After all, success is not about you; it’s about those that you serve.

“When you get out of your own big fat head and how you’re being perceived, and focus on what it is you are trying to say, the effect of the haters disappears” – Tim Denning

 

***The End Of The Story***

So I promised you all at the start that the story has a happy ending, and it does as always, otherwise it wouldn’t be in the true Addicted2Success style. After the hundreds of complaints I received, the photo got changed by my editor, and the article ended up being shared thousands of times on social media.

It became so popular that it hit number four on Entrepreneur.com’s most popular article list. What a great way to be featured on the site for the very first time. Everything happens for a reason so just go with the flow and know that you’re going to be remarkable no matter what you do.

Short-term disappointment can always be replaced by euphoria and joy if your mind is programmed to focus on what’s good in this world and to drown out all the negativity that we’ve become so addicted to as a society. Live your dream and never give up!

Have you ever experienced a rush of criticism like this before? Let me know on my website timdenning.net or my Facebook.

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship. You can connect with Tim through his website www.timdenning.net

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. Toño

    Sep 28, 2016 at 5:07 pm

    Hey, Tim! Glad to see you back from your journey! And what a lovely article to start with 🙂

    Funny thing you mentioned about luxury cars, as I wouldn’t even notice the difference and most likely believed that’s a Ferrari haha 😀 Even more, Bugatti sounds familiar to me because I worked with the guy who’s been obsessed with those cars, I can even hardly imagine what does it look like, leave alone al the details.

    You have been spot on after all, it’s just an overpriced chank of metal really (let’s be honest, it is) and if place all of your attention on it, rather than valuable information, then perhaps you shouldn’t be reading the article in the first place and browse some fancy car magazine instead.

    You taught me Tim, that not everyone will recognize and appreciate the value, and that’s the exact case.

    What about that ‘bad’ grammar you used? Let’s talk about this. Honestly, reading articles every single day, having online conversations, visiting and moderating forums, consuming books, and youtube videos, I can hardly know where is actually the good spelling and quality grammar is. Everyone talk differently and you can see top people make new words and rules just out of their heads and it is accepted. Many words you can spell and pronounce in many different ways and as using English a second language I can tell I just adjust and adapt with the progress. I can honestly say I enjoy people’s imperfection, whether it clothing, funny behaviour or ‘bad’ grammar. It makes them all more human after all as we are not some machines who strive for eternal perfection.

    On the other side, I learnt that while reading John Kehoe a few years ago – everything can be perceived as you really wish to. it is all about perspective and you can transform even the ugliest, wrong and terrible event as the most fantastic, awesome and beautiful one if you have a desire. Bad spelling? Ha, a unique one! A new way to spell, a new way to understand! We are all different and amazing beings if we can choose to think of our growth!

    By the way, I have read that article about a Ferrari on Entrepreneur and enjoyed it much! I found another one there and will read it tomorrow at my work, and my huge appreciation for pointing that source out as well. Always a pleasure to read you, my friend 🙂 Oh, and I am very happy you made it to #4 most popular article haha, that was an amazing outcome in the end!

    I’m glad this article brought you so much to think of and even write about it here. Don’t you ever let haters bring you down, after all, they are your biggest fans 😉 They care thus the try their hard to uplift you in their own unique ability, remember? Also remember, that your articles helps humans like myself to wake up in the morning, help find their purpose and fight boredom at the job haha. I print and read your articles every day and my bosses think I’m researching something about the job. Well, in some good sense I am, studying valuable information and looking for my future opportunities to change and improve my life, which often keeps my attitude on top, so yeah, remember that as well Tim, and never give up! You are the best, my man!

    Have a great day, and thank you so very much! Oh, and please post more photos from your trip to US, I loved the Golden Gates picture 😀 You can also share some experience with us, I would appreciate it a lot!

    • Tim Denning

      Oct 3, 2016 at 12:07 am

      Toño it’s great to be back and I’m glad you wouldn’t have noticed the difference in cars. It’s good to see that grammar is not an issue from your point of view and half the time I find it subjective and open to interpretation. Thanks for reading my article on Entrepreneur and it’s awesome that you liked it.

      Also, thanks for printing the articles and trying to subtract the juice from them. It’s the only way to learn. Speak soon mate.

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Life

You Can Create Whatever Life You Want So Stop Talking Yourself Out of Your Destiny

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There’s never been a time like right now in human history for entrepreneurship. We have access to virtually limitless knowledge thanks to the advent of the internet, and you can reach anyone on this planet literally at the click of a button.

However, despite the massive amount of opportunity out there, there are still time-tested principles that every wanna-be entrepreneur needs to know in order to truly succeed. Knowing these principles can spell the difference between achieving your dreams and talking yourself out of your destiny.

There is Such a Thing as Preparing Too Much

While it’s certainly necessary to prepare in life, a just as devastating problem many people face in life is being too prepared. Way too often, people believe they’re actually working by spending hours “preparing” when all they’re doing is thinking about working while their actual work goes untouched.

As Gary Vaynerchuk put it bluntly in one of his livestream Q&A videos, “There are just so many ways to build your business, but lack of action is not one of them.” Basically, we are both blessed and cursed by our access to virtually limitless knowledge. We can turn on the faucet of knowledge and grab a quick swig when we need it, but if we leave it on for too long we’ll be drowning in information and be stuck trying to process everything.

If you spend too much time processing, you’ll be more likely to talk yourself out of taking the risks necessary to build a successful business. The solution is simple: stop processing and start taking action.

A phrase I find myself repeating a lot when I get into a bind is, “How did successful people do it before the age of internet?” The answer is they did it by not talking themselves off of the ledge of destiny and instead diving into their project headfirst.

“Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay.” – Simone de Beauvoir

Our Feelings Often Lie to Us

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve felt like throwing in the towel when trying to build my web design business. I remember one day in particular I had a massive headache and was on the verge of quitting everything due to the frustration I felt while dealing with a problematic client.

I looked at my watch and realized I hadn’t eaten yet that morning, so I went and made myself breakfast. After eating a bowl of scrambled eggs and toast, my headache magically vanished along with my thoughts of wanting to quit. I quickly realized what needed to be done and fixed the client’s issue without much thought. The problem wasn’t with the client, the problem was with my stomach.

Can you imagine how ridiculous I would have looked had I fired my client all because I hadn’t eaten that day? This is why our feelings sometimes need to take a backseat when it comes to making wise, calculated decisions for our success.

Intuition is important, obviously, but it’s best utilized with years of reliable experience to back it up. So go with your gut when it’s wise to do so, but always make sure your gut is fed otherwise you may regret what it has to say.

Perfectionism Can Halt All Progress

You will never have everything figured out. Let that sink in. It’s become such a trope in our society that it’s surprising how easily we tend to forget it. There isn’t a single business out there that has all the answers on how to do things right, so why do we feel the need to stop moving forward if things aren’t perfect?

I remember a friend of mine spent years trying to compose music on his synthesizer but never released anything because it “wasn’t good enough” by his standards. I gave him the simple proposition to “put out crappy music”, since no matter what he would always think his music was crappy due to his perfectionist mindset. Within a day, he finally put something out on SoundCloud and his song “#Selfie” became a hit worldwide while his band The ChainSmokers continues to put out hits to this day.

OK, I’m kidding about that last part, but hopefully you get my point. My friend finally had a song out that he could have had out years ago but was too caught up on making everything “perfect” to do anything. He had, in effect, talked himself out of taking action. The same thing applies with business, even if you don’t have everything figured out it’s best to just start something and learn as you go.

“Imperfection is perfection.” – Flume

Whenever that annoying, perfectionist voice in your head tries to get you to quit because you’ll never have the “perfect” product or service to sell, tell it to shut up and put out your product or service anyway. As you gain experience in your field and receive valuable feedback from customers, you’ll be able to continually improve things with your business.

Had you not taken action to begin with, you would never have attained either of these two valuable assets. Never settle for mediocrity, but at the same time recognize your need to be in motion even if the thing that sets you in motion is initially subpar.

How do you push yourself and keep motivated? Let us know your thoughts below!

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3 Mental Tricks to Help You Become a More Productive Person

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Whether you’re a career salesman, a student, or a software engineer, you can’t move an inch in your career if you produce less. Productivity is the key that will unlock your success. Unfortunately, not all of us are productive. And some of it is not our problem. Our Internet-empowered world is bloated with too many social media tools, too many emails and notifications, too many SMS and short messages, too many YouTube videos and Netflix movies. The distractions are at an all time high.

But what if there is a system that will help you keep all these distractions aside until you have accomplished your tasks? There is. And it only takes 3 simple steps. Read Below:

Step 1: See your everyday tasks as a gift

Showing up every day to work is anything but fun. You know your life depends on it, but some days are not your best days. No matter how you plan your projects, you can’t show up to do them. You’re tired and bored and uninterested. What’s the way forward? It’s not about planning. It’s not about waking up early. It’s not about lack of exercise or anything like that.

If you want to conquer your to-do list, day in and day out, you need a simple shift in your mindset. Stop thinking of your tasks as work. See those tasks as gifts…as natural endowments exclusively given to you. This simple shift in your mindset will awaken the sleeping giant within you. You’ll start feeling great about yourself, stop seeing your work as burdensome. The tasks will now make you feel proud.

No longer will your showing up early at your desk irritate you—because now you feel comfortable doing the work that matters. The mindset adjustment is not even difficult. Just figure out the value that your tasks will bring to your marketplace.

“Focus on being productive instead of busy.” – Tim Ferriss

Step 2: Be conscious of the impeccable values of your tasks

That’s how to shift your thinking. You dissect the unique values that are embedded in your tasks (when you accomplish them, of course). If you’re a web designer, for example, think about the joy and life-changing events that your design job will bring to your client. That landing page that you’ll design, it would mean the world to your client.

It will even change their business and their lives along the way. But that will not happen if you don’t show up every day, roll up your sleeves and work on that landing page. Now if you can visualize that value, it will serve you well. You’ll be motivated. So, how do you become more conscious of the values of your work? Write them down. And read them every day to spark your productivity.

Step 3: Remind yourself of the limited time you have in life

We like to postpone today’s tasks for tomorrow. Often, we’ll schedule a time to work, but when the time is due, we come up with another excuse, “I’ve got to call that client instead; I’ll leave that work till tomorrow.” But we don’t own tomorrow. We don’t have control over it. We don’t even know what it holds. And we have a very limited time.

If you want to improve your productivity, you have got to remind yourself about the scarcity of your time. Here are a few questions to ask yourself (I recommend that you do these exercises every time before you begin to work):

  • If you only have 24 hours left today, how do you want to spend it?
  • If you have 5 projects to complete today, how do you manage your time?
  • Would you rather watch a movie on Netflix or accomplish today’s task and move closer to your vision?

“Do something instead of killing time because time is killing you.” – Paulo Coelho

It’s about making smart choices. I know It’s hard. It’s tough. It requires an impeccable amount of discipline. But with constant practice, these mental tricks will help you become a more productive person, move you closer to realizing your vision.

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7 Simple Tips to Help You Eliminate Negative Thoughts

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Have you been feeling low lately? Are you missing being the person you once used to be? In this fast-paced life of ours, it is not surprising to feel depressed. 15 out of 100 adults in the USA fall prey to depression every year.

As we get more and more detached from reality and bury ourselves into the virtual world of our smartphones, anxiety and stress seep into our brain and make us lose sight of the happy versions of ourselves. It is optimism alone that keeps us going by giving us the will to fight the battle within us. The power to usher in positivity and shoo off the negative thoughts rests with you.

Here’s what you can do to remove the dark cloud of pessimism that hovers over you:

1. Train your mind to think positive

Affirmations can help boost your self-esteem. If you continue to affirm your brain, it will learn to believe in you and will work positively. Positive affirmations are scientifically proven and can make miracles happen. Tell yourself that you are getting better and your subconscious will adapt to it and function accordingly.

Train your brain to give a neutral spin to all your negative thoughts. Since, building a positive mindset isn’t an easy task to do, the neutral thoughts will help you keep the negativity at bay and aid you in paving your path towards positivity.

2. Cultivate self-love

If you have been waiting for a pair of arms to reach out and rescue you, you might just have to wait longer. Instead, be your own messiah. In order to do so, you have to perfect the art of self-love. Nurture your narcissism a bit and learn to appreciate yourself more often.

Learn to turn down offers politely and indulge in some quality Me-time. Bake your favorite cake or shop for the dress that you had been eyeing for quite some time now. Go get a spa treatment and appreciate the daily efforts that you make.

“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.” – Brené Brown

3. Keep yourself busy

The key to ward off negativity is to keep your brain busy, so that it does not get the time to breed ill thoughts. Considering how the descent towards the abysmal pit of depression starts at our workstation, I would suggest that you find engagements outside your workplace that helps your mind to relax.

You can try reading lighthearted literature. A personal favorite, the Chicken Soup for the Soul, can actually nurture your brain with the much-needed optimism to fight away the negative blues. Listen to happy, soulful music or take a stroll in the fresh air.

4. Surround yourself with positivity

People around us have the power to affect us – in both positive and negative ways. Their actions affect us, and we take their words to heart. Quite often, negative thoughts cloud our minds because of a seed that was sown by someone we hold close to our hearts. The people we walk and talk with are capable of influencing our emotions. So, you must choose your company wisely.

Surround yourself with people who care for you and love you. Love is the only magic potion for us muggles, and with the right kind of love and support, we can eliminate the negative thoughts that wreak havoc in our brains. Also, learn to block unwanted people from your lives.

5. Be a social butterfly

In this age of social media, we have more virtual friends than actual friends. So, come out of the virtual world and spend some time with your family and friends. Your family members fall among the ones who love you just as you are. At the end of the day, they are the ones who matter.

Moreover, when you go out of your way to help someone, you feel more positive. Rescuing someone from the same pit of darkness as you are in can help you ward off your own demons. So, don’t shy away from community work.

“Society is like a large piece of frozen water; and skating well is the great art of social life.” – Letitia Elizabeth Landon

6. Lead a healthy life

Exercise and meditation can be of immense help when it comes to overcoming stress and negative thoughts. When you exercise, your brain releases chemicals like dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin which play an important role in regulating your mood. Mediation helps you to increase your brain power and aligns your thought processes towards optimism.

Other than exercising, you must get enough sleep. Proper sleep helps our bodies to recover from the daily toil and provides it with the time to repair. Also, try to eat healthy food. Avoid gluten, caffeine, and sugar as they make you bitter and depressed. Keep your body healthy, which in turn will tell your brain to be more positive.

7. Make your ambiance teem with positivity

Other than exercising and eating healthy, you can take little steps like drawing yourself a bath or sleeping with a heavier comforter on to make yourself feel more calm and composed. When you feel rejuvenated physically, your mind will automatically feel relaxed.

Get your upholstery in happier shades of light pastels and make sure that your room is adequately lit up. However small these changes might be, they will welcome positivity into your life.

In the end, I would like to emphasize the importance of reducing stress. Train your brain to focus on the brighter side of things, so that depression and negativity cannot take a toll on your mental health. Trust me when I say that you are stronger than you think!

Which one of these 7 tips to eliminate negative thoughts do you need to work on most? Let us know how you’re going to work on it below!

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4 Steps to Accepting and Acting on Negative Feedback

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All feedback is good, but not all feedback is positive. We’re often subject to negative feedback at work for different scenarios such as missing a performance target set by the organization or developing a high-end product idea that flopped after testing.

Regardless of the reason, accepting negative feedback can be difficult—especially if there is pressure across the board to perform in the face of perpetual downsizing, outsourcing, or consolidation.

It can be even harder if you’re just starting out. It’s easy to take the feedback as a personal affront. But nothing could be farther from the truth. Performance feedback isn’t meant to insult or demean, it’s an attempt to rehabilitate.

Think about it, why would your supervisor take the time to talk it out if they’d already given up on you? Because motivating a team also means holding team members accountable for what’s not working. Receiving feedback is a chance to improve and better support those around us.

So next time you’re called into the boss’ office for feedback, consider these four steps below:

1. Detach – Remember that it’s not personal

The first step is to detach, emotionally that is. Before the conversation starts, remind yourself that this feedback is based on job performance and factors that include objective data. It has nothing to do with how nice you are, how fun you are around the office, or how you live your life away from work.

Your supervisor is trying to do their job as well as you’ve been trying to do yours. They feel that talking to you now is vital for your own well-being as a team member and for the team as a whole. If there’s something you’re doing that needs to be better, they have a responsibility to everyone on the team to tell you—and early enough so you can address it and make the end result better for everyone.

“I think it’s very important to have a feedback loop, where you’re constantly thinking about what you’ve done and how you could be doing it better.” – Elon Musk

2. Information – Focus on the data

Your supervisor’s description of your performance should be specific and actionable, so listen first and take careful notes as you pick up on themes. The earlier you try to respond, the more likely you will appear defensive and only out to present your ‘side’.

If you focus on listening and taking down what observations they have, you are more likely to capture what needs improvement. If you’re focused on improving those things, you’ll ultimately grow and be successful in supporting the organization and remaining an asset to those around you.

3. Vision – Create an image of what improvement looks like

The conversation is over. You’ve left the office and are back in your workspace. Review your notes and think about what your supervisor said. It’s time to work on the counter-image—what does improvement look like? This is an exercise in setting and realizing a vision.

Imagine what it looks like for the opposite of the feedback to be true. Don’t think about the steps to get there yet. Focus on ‘winning’ the situation, accounting for each observation your supervisor provided and experiencing success. Develop a narrative that you can see the same way you can watch a television series play out.

Got the image? Now plan your steps, in reverse from the vision you have to the moment you find yourself in now. You must have a vision of where you’ll end up before you can plan the steps to get there, otherwise you’ll set out on a path that leads nowhere—and therefore never ends.

“Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein

4. Empathize – Put yourself in the shoes of those around you

This is the most important step. Your supervisor felt it was the best thing for you and the team to tell you where you fell short and afford you a golden opportunity to do better. The truth is the conversation was likely as difficult for them as it was for you. Having to tell a teammate they’re not meeting standards can eat away at a manager, and is challenging because they must now consider what happens if you’re unable to improve.

You both have the organization’s best interest in mind. Feel what it’s like from their side, what it takes to manage the team and support everyone while meeting performance milestones set by senior leadership. Then think about the team around you.

What are they hoping to see from you? What can you do to help them focus elsewhere in the organization where there’s more work to be done? If you can push the envelope of improvement and get your team moving forward, it allows others to worry about the bigger problems ahead that will take everyone’s effort to solve.

Feedback is a tool for improvement, for yourself and those around you. If you’re receptive, you’ll engender trust and remain as an asset to the organization. That goes for managers, too.

Feedback is a two-way street, so if you’re that supervisor, remember to solicit feedback from your employees on a regular basis and rely on these same four steps to improve and look positively to the future.

How do you deal with handling negative feedback? Let us know your tips for others!

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Building a Knockout Team With the 4 Stages of Learning

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I’m sure you’ve heard that running a business alone can be challenging, but if that’s true, then running a business of 5, 50 or 500 must be extremely challenging! This can be made much simpler by building from a solid foundation. By that I mean a strong core of team members around you. (more…)

Demitrez Butler is the President of RealTeam Consulting, Inc. in San Diego, CA. He worked with Air Force Security Forces for 4 years before starting in an entry-level sales position and growing within the sales and marketing industry. He later opened a marketing firm in eastern Washington that changed the dynamic of the telecom market in that region. Most recently he works as a consultant for high level network marketers. When he isn’t working you can find him on a plane traveling to the next must see city on his list.

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2 Comments

2 Comments

  1. Toño

    Sep 28, 2016 at 5:07 pm

    Hey, Tim! Glad to see you back from your journey! And what a lovely article to start with 🙂

    Funny thing you mentioned about luxury cars, as I wouldn’t even notice the difference and most likely believed that’s a Ferrari haha 😀 Even more, Bugatti sounds familiar to me because I worked with the guy who’s been obsessed with those cars, I can even hardly imagine what does it look like, leave alone al the details.

    You have been spot on after all, it’s just an overpriced chank of metal really (let’s be honest, it is) and if place all of your attention on it, rather than valuable information, then perhaps you shouldn’t be reading the article in the first place and browse some fancy car magazine instead.

    You taught me Tim, that not everyone will recognize and appreciate the value, and that’s the exact case.

    What about that ‘bad’ grammar you used? Let’s talk about this. Honestly, reading articles every single day, having online conversations, visiting and moderating forums, consuming books, and youtube videos, I can hardly know where is actually the good spelling and quality grammar is. Everyone talk differently and you can see top people make new words and rules just out of their heads and it is accepted. Many words you can spell and pronounce in many different ways and as using English a second language I can tell I just adjust and adapt with the progress. I can honestly say I enjoy people’s imperfection, whether it clothing, funny behaviour or ‘bad’ grammar. It makes them all more human after all as we are not some machines who strive for eternal perfection.

    On the other side, I learnt that while reading John Kehoe a few years ago – everything can be perceived as you really wish to. it is all about perspective and you can transform even the ugliest, wrong and terrible event as the most fantastic, awesome and beautiful one if you have a desire. Bad spelling? Ha, a unique one! A new way to spell, a new way to understand! We are all different and amazing beings if we can choose to think of our growth!

    By the way, I have read that article about a Ferrari on Entrepreneur and enjoyed it much! I found another one there and will read it tomorrow at my work, and my huge appreciation for pointing that source out as well. Always a pleasure to read you, my friend 🙂 Oh, and I am very happy you made it to #4 most popular article haha, that was an amazing outcome in the end!

    I’m glad this article brought you so much to think of and even write about it here. Don’t you ever let haters bring you down, after all, they are your biggest fans 😉 They care thus the try their hard to uplift you in their own unique ability, remember? Also remember, that your articles helps humans like myself to wake up in the morning, help find their purpose and fight boredom at the job haha. I print and read your articles every day and my bosses think I’m researching something about the job. Well, in some good sense I am, studying valuable information and looking for my future opportunities to change and improve my life, which often keeps my attitude on top, so yeah, remember that as well Tim, and never give up! You are the best, my man!

    Have a great day, and thank you so very much! Oh, and please post more photos from your trip to US, I loved the Golden Gates picture 😀 You can also share some experience with us, I would appreciate it a lot!

    • Tim Denning

      Oct 3, 2016 at 12:07 am

      Toño it’s great to be back and I’m glad you wouldn’t have noticed the difference in cars. It’s good to see that grammar is not an issue from your point of view and half the time I find it subjective and open to interpretation. Thanks for reading my article on Entrepreneur and it’s awesome that you liked it.

      Also, thanks for printing the articles and trying to subtract the juice from them. It’s the only way to learn. Speak soon mate.

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Life

You Can Create Whatever Life You Want So Stop Talking Yourself Out of Your Destiny

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There’s never been a time like right now in human history for entrepreneurship. We have access to virtually limitless knowledge thanks to the advent of the internet, and you can reach anyone on this planet literally at the click of a button.

However, despite the massive amount of opportunity out there, there are still time-tested principles that every wanna-be entrepreneur needs to know in order to truly succeed. Knowing these principles can spell the difference between achieving your dreams and talking yourself out of your destiny.

There is Such a Thing as Preparing Too Much

While it’s certainly necessary to prepare in life, a just as devastating problem many people face in life is being too prepared. Way too often, people believe they’re actually working by spending hours “preparing” when all they’re doing is thinking about working while their actual work goes untouched.

As Gary Vaynerchuk put it bluntly in one of his livestream Q&A videos, “There are just so many ways to build your business, but lack of action is not one of them.” Basically, we are both blessed and cursed by our access to virtually limitless knowledge. We can turn on the faucet of knowledge and grab a quick swig when we need it, but if we leave it on for too long we’ll be drowning in information and be stuck trying to process everything.

If you spend too much time processing, you’ll be more likely to talk yourself out of taking the risks necessary to build a successful business. The solution is simple: stop processing and start taking action.

A phrase I find myself repeating a lot when I get into a bind is, “How did successful people do it before the age of internet?” The answer is they did it by not talking themselves off of the ledge of destiny and instead diving into their project headfirst.

“Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay.” – Simone de Beauvoir

Our Feelings Often Lie to Us

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve felt like throwing in the towel when trying to build my web design business. I remember one day in particular I had a massive headache and was on the verge of quitting everything due to the frustration I felt while dealing with a problematic client.

I looked at my watch and realized I hadn’t eaten yet that morning, so I went and made myself breakfast. After eating a bowl of scrambled eggs and toast, my headache magically vanished along with my thoughts of wanting to quit. I quickly realized what needed to be done and fixed the client’s issue without much thought. The problem wasn’t with the client, the problem was with my stomach.

Can you imagine how ridiculous I would have looked had I fired my client all because I hadn’t eaten that day? This is why our feelings sometimes need to take a backseat when it comes to making wise, calculated decisions for our success.

Intuition is important, obviously, but it’s best utilized with years of reliable experience to back it up. So go with your gut when it’s wise to do so, but always make sure your gut is fed otherwise you may regret what it has to say.

Perfectionism Can Halt All Progress

You will never have everything figured out. Let that sink in. It’s become such a trope in our society that it’s surprising how easily we tend to forget it. There isn’t a single business out there that has all the answers on how to do things right, so why do we feel the need to stop moving forward if things aren’t perfect?

I remember a friend of mine spent years trying to compose music on his synthesizer but never released anything because it “wasn’t good enough” by his standards. I gave him the simple proposition to “put out crappy music”, since no matter what he would always think his music was crappy due to his perfectionist mindset. Within a day, he finally put something out on SoundCloud and his song “#Selfie” became a hit worldwide while his band The ChainSmokers continues to put out hits to this day.

OK, I’m kidding about that last part, but hopefully you get my point. My friend finally had a song out that he could have had out years ago but was too caught up on making everything “perfect” to do anything. He had, in effect, talked himself out of taking action. The same thing applies with business, even if you don’t have everything figured out it’s best to just start something and learn as you go.

“Imperfection is perfection.” – Flume

Whenever that annoying, perfectionist voice in your head tries to get you to quit because you’ll never have the “perfect” product or service to sell, tell it to shut up and put out your product or service anyway. As you gain experience in your field and receive valuable feedback from customers, you’ll be able to continually improve things with your business.

Had you not taken action to begin with, you would never have attained either of these two valuable assets. Never settle for mediocrity, but at the same time recognize your need to be in motion even if the thing that sets you in motion is initially subpar.

How do you push yourself and keep motivated? Let us know your thoughts below!

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3 Mental Tricks to Help You Become a More Productive Person

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Whether you’re a career salesman, a student, or a software engineer, you can’t move an inch in your career if you produce less. Productivity is the key that will unlock your success. Unfortunately, not all of us are productive. And some of it is not our problem. Our Internet-empowered world is bloated with too many social media tools, too many emails and notifications, too many SMS and short messages, too many YouTube videos and Netflix movies. The distractions are at an all time high.

But what if there is a system that will help you keep all these distractions aside until you have accomplished your tasks? There is. And it only takes 3 simple steps. Read Below:

Step 1: See your everyday tasks as a gift

Showing up every day to work is anything but fun. You know your life depends on it, but some days are not your best days. No matter how you plan your projects, you can’t show up to do them. You’re tired and bored and uninterested. What’s the way forward? It’s not about planning. It’s not about waking up early. It’s not about lack of exercise or anything like that.

If you want to conquer your to-do list, day in and day out, you need a simple shift in your mindset. Stop thinking of your tasks as work. See those tasks as gifts…as natural endowments exclusively given to you. This simple shift in your mindset will awaken the sleeping giant within you. You’ll start feeling great about yourself, stop seeing your work as burdensome. The tasks will now make you feel proud.

No longer will your showing up early at your desk irritate you—because now you feel comfortable doing the work that matters. The mindset adjustment is not even difficult. Just figure out the value that your tasks will bring to your marketplace.

“Focus on being productive instead of busy.” – Tim Ferriss

Step 2: Be conscious of the impeccable values of your tasks

That’s how to shift your thinking. You dissect the unique values that are embedded in your tasks (when you accomplish them, of course). If you’re a web designer, for example, think about the joy and life-changing events that your design job will bring to your client. That landing page that you’ll design, it would mean the world to your client.

It will even change their business and their lives along the way. But that will not happen if you don’t show up every day, roll up your sleeves and work on that landing page. Now if you can visualize that value, it will serve you well. You’ll be motivated. So, how do you become more conscious of the values of your work? Write them down. And read them every day to spark your productivity.

Step 3: Remind yourself of the limited time you have in life

We like to postpone today’s tasks for tomorrow. Often, we’ll schedule a time to work, but when the time is due, we come up with another excuse, “I’ve got to call that client instead; I’ll leave that work till tomorrow.” But we don’t own tomorrow. We don’t have control over it. We don’t even know what it holds. And we have a very limited time.

If you want to improve your productivity, you have got to remind yourself about the scarcity of your time. Here are a few questions to ask yourself (I recommend that you do these exercises every time before you begin to work):

  • If you only have 24 hours left today, how do you want to spend it?
  • If you have 5 projects to complete today, how do you manage your time?
  • Would you rather watch a movie on Netflix or accomplish today’s task and move closer to your vision?

“Do something instead of killing time because time is killing you.” – Paulo Coelho

It’s about making smart choices. I know It’s hard. It’s tough. It requires an impeccable amount of discipline. But with constant practice, these mental tricks will help you become a more productive person, move you closer to realizing your vision.

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7 Simple Tips to Help You Eliminate Negative Thoughts

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Have you been feeling low lately? Are you missing being the person you once used to be? In this fast-paced life of ours, it is not surprising to feel depressed. 15 out of 100 adults in the USA fall prey to depression every year.

As we get more and more detached from reality and bury ourselves into the virtual world of our smartphones, anxiety and stress seep into our brain and make us lose sight of the happy versions of ourselves. It is optimism alone that keeps us going by giving us the will to fight the battle within us. The power to usher in positivity and shoo off the negative thoughts rests with you.

Here’s what you can do to remove the dark cloud of pessimism that hovers over you:

1. Train your mind to think positive

Affirmations can help boost your self-esteem. If you continue to affirm your brain, it will learn to believe in you and will work positively. Positive affirmations are scientifically proven and can make miracles happen. Tell yourself that you are getting better and your subconscious will adapt to it and function accordingly.

Train your brain to give a neutral spin to all your negative thoughts. Since, building a positive mindset isn’t an easy task to do, the neutral thoughts will help you keep the negativity at bay and aid you in paving your path towards positivity.

2. Cultivate self-love

If you have been waiting for a pair of arms to reach out and rescue you, you might just have to wait longer. Instead, be your own messiah. In order to do so, you have to perfect the art of self-love. Nurture your narcissism a bit and learn to appreciate yourself more often.

Learn to turn down offers politely and indulge in some quality Me-time. Bake your favorite cake or shop for the dress that you had been eyeing for quite some time now. Go get a spa treatment and appreciate the daily efforts that you make.

“Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we’ll ever do.” – Brené Brown

3. Keep yourself busy

The key to ward off negativity is to keep your brain busy, so that it does not get the time to breed ill thoughts. Considering how the descent towards the abysmal pit of depression starts at our workstation, I would suggest that you find engagements outside your workplace that helps your mind to relax.

You can try reading lighthearted literature. A personal favorite, the Chicken Soup for the Soul, can actually nurture your brain with the much-needed optimism to fight away the negative blues. Listen to happy, soulful music or take a stroll in the fresh air.

4. Surround yourself with positivity

People around us have the power to affect us – in both positive and negative ways. Their actions affect us, and we take their words to heart. Quite often, negative thoughts cloud our minds because of a seed that was sown by someone we hold close to our hearts. The people we walk and talk with are capable of influencing our emotions. So, you must choose your company wisely.

Surround yourself with people who care for you and love you. Love is the only magic potion for us muggles, and with the right kind of love and support, we can eliminate the negative thoughts that wreak havoc in our brains. Also, learn to block unwanted people from your lives.

5. Be a social butterfly

In this age of social media, we have more virtual friends than actual friends. So, come out of the virtual world and spend some time with your family and friends. Your family members fall among the ones who love you just as you are. At the end of the day, they are the ones who matter.

Moreover, when you go out of your way to help someone, you feel more positive. Rescuing someone from the same pit of darkness as you are in can help you ward off your own demons. So, don’t shy away from community work.

“Society is like a large piece of frozen water; and skating well is the great art of social life.” – Letitia Elizabeth Landon

6. Lead a healthy life

Exercise and meditation can be of immense help when it comes to overcoming stress and negative thoughts. When you exercise, your brain releases chemicals like dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin which play an important role in regulating your mood. Mediation helps you to increase your brain power and aligns your thought processes towards optimism.

Other than exercising, you must get enough sleep. Proper sleep helps our bodies to recover from the daily toil and provides it with the time to repair. Also, try to eat healthy food. Avoid gluten, caffeine, and sugar as they make you bitter and depressed. Keep your body healthy, which in turn will tell your brain to be more positive.

7. Make your ambiance teem with positivity

Other than exercising and eating healthy, you can take little steps like drawing yourself a bath or sleeping with a heavier comforter on to make yourself feel more calm and composed. When you feel rejuvenated physically, your mind will automatically feel relaxed.

Get your upholstery in happier shades of light pastels and make sure that your room is adequately lit up. However small these changes might be, they will welcome positivity into your life.

In the end, I would like to emphasize the importance of reducing stress. Train your brain to focus on the brighter side of things, so that depression and negativity cannot take a toll on your mental health. Trust me when I say that you are stronger than you think!

Which one of these 7 tips to eliminate negative thoughts do you need to work on most? Let us know how you’re going to work on it below!

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4 Steps to Accepting and Acting on Negative Feedback

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All feedback is good, but not all feedback is positive. We’re often subject to negative feedback at work for different scenarios such as missing a performance target set by the organization or developing a high-end product idea that flopped after testing.

Regardless of the reason, accepting negative feedback can be difficult—especially if there is pressure across the board to perform in the face of perpetual downsizing, outsourcing, or consolidation.

It can be even harder if you’re just starting out. It’s easy to take the feedback as a personal affront. But nothing could be farther from the truth. Performance feedback isn’t meant to insult or demean, it’s an attempt to rehabilitate.

Think about it, why would your supervisor take the time to talk it out if they’d already given up on you? Because motivating a team also means holding team members accountable for what’s not working. Receiving feedback is a chance to improve and better support those around us.

So next time you’re called into the boss’ office for feedback, consider these four steps below:

1. Detach – Remember that it’s not personal

The first step is to detach, emotionally that is. Before the conversation starts, remind yourself that this feedback is based on job performance and factors that include objective data. It has nothing to do with how nice you are, how fun you are around the office, or how you live your life away from work.

Your supervisor is trying to do their job as well as you’ve been trying to do yours. They feel that talking to you now is vital for your own well-being as a team member and for the team as a whole. If there’s something you’re doing that needs to be better, they have a responsibility to everyone on the team to tell you—and early enough so you can address it and make the end result better for everyone.

“I think it’s very important to have a feedback loop, where you’re constantly thinking about what you’ve done and how you could be doing it better.” – Elon Musk

2. Information – Focus on the data

Your supervisor’s description of your performance should be specific and actionable, so listen first and take careful notes as you pick up on themes. The earlier you try to respond, the more likely you will appear defensive and only out to present your ‘side’.

If you focus on listening and taking down what observations they have, you are more likely to capture what needs improvement. If you’re focused on improving those things, you’ll ultimately grow and be successful in supporting the organization and remaining an asset to those around you.

3. Vision – Create an image of what improvement looks like

The conversation is over. You’ve left the office and are back in your workspace. Review your notes and think about what your supervisor said. It’s time to work on the counter-image—what does improvement look like? This is an exercise in setting and realizing a vision.

Imagine what it looks like for the opposite of the feedback to be true. Don’t think about the steps to get there yet. Focus on ‘winning’ the situation, accounting for each observation your supervisor provided and experiencing success. Develop a narrative that you can see the same way you can watch a television series play out.

Got the image? Now plan your steps, in reverse from the vision you have to the moment you find yourself in now. You must have a vision of where you’ll end up before you can plan the steps to get there, otherwise you’ll set out on a path that leads nowhere—and therefore never ends.

“Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value.” – Albert Einstein

4. Empathize – Put yourself in the shoes of those around you

This is the most important step. Your supervisor felt it was the best thing for you and the team to tell you where you fell short and afford you a golden opportunity to do better. The truth is the conversation was likely as difficult for them as it was for you. Having to tell a teammate they’re not meeting standards can eat away at a manager, and is challenging because they must now consider what happens if you’re unable to improve.

You both have the organization’s best interest in mind. Feel what it’s like from their side, what it takes to manage the team and support everyone while meeting performance milestones set by senior leadership. Then think about the team around you.

What are they hoping to see from you? What can you do to help them focus elsewhere in the organization where there’s more work to be done? If you can push the envelope of improvement and get your team moving forward, it allows others to worry about the bigger problems ahead that will take everyone’s effort to solve.

Feedback is a tool for improvement, for yourself and those around you. If you’re receptive, you’ll engender trust and remain as an asset to the organization. That goes for managers, too.

Feedback is a two-way street, so if you’re that supervisor, remember to solicit feedback from your employees on a regular basis and rely on these same four steps to improve and look positively to the future.

How do you deal with handling negative feedback? Let us know your tips for others!

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