Life
The 7 Laws For Living an Uncommon Dream

Fulfilling your purpose has never been more important to you than it is right now. You’re on a mission to discover all of who you are and committed to developing your unique contribution to the world.
You surround yourself with super stars, you listen to audiobooks, and you watch inspirational YouTube video daily trying to find ways to improve your life. You my friend are a dreamer with an uncommon dream.
People with uncommon dreams are uniquely wired and accept that they’re here to play a bigger game and by different rules. But not following rules doesn’t omit the fact that there are still laws that play into how far and how fast our dreams come to life, especially uncommon ones.
Here are the 7 laws for living an uncommon dream:
1. Law of persuasion
As a leader it is your responsibility to consistently take what’s in your mind and place it on the hearts of those who follow you. The challenge for many leaders is that they don’t always have a clear plan as to where they are taking people. Not having a well-defined plan is detrimental as a leader because it creates confused people and confused people don’t take action. A strong plan simplifies the complicated and provides a leader with a blueprint for persuasion.
Once a leader is clear on where he or she is leading their followers, the next step is to decide what separates you from the other leaders. Why? It’s simple. If you don’t know your difference then no one can pursue you for your difference. All dreams, especially uncommon ones, require the emotional, physical and financial support of a community of people. One of the hardest lessons I learned, as a budding entrepreneur, was that many of the people I wanted to lead were not going to care as much about my dream as I did- at least at first.
I discovered that it was my job to be charmingly relentless and persuade others to champion it just as much, if not more than I did. John C. Maxwell stated in, The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, “He who calls himself a leader and has no followers is only taking a walk.” What he was saying is give people so much value that they have no choice but to follow you.
“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.” – Walt Disney
2. Law of focus
Dreamers are inclined to think in layers, textures and colors making concentration their single greatest challenge. The great American author, Mark Twain said it well, “You can’t depend on your focus when your imagination is out of focus.” Your thoughts and ideas must be grounded in something solid – a bigger purpose. You must get good at investing your time and energy in the things and with people who encourage and inspire you to produce results daily.
The uncommon dream demands a remarkable focus. All leaders should design a system that brings them back when they realized their focus has shifted elsewhere. If you don’t have a system here is a 5-Step Process to jump start your focus. Find a system that works and stick to it like glue. The reason leaders with uncommon dreams fail is because they’ve allowed temporary circumstances to break their focus.
3. Law of respect
The law of respect is simple. You only attract what you respect; you only respect what you see value in. Your value system is much like your taste buds, they tend to evolve over time. Part of living an uncommon dream involves making a great deal of decisions. Each decision you make will do one of two things to your dream, shrink it or stretch it.
Over time you learn to find value in people that can further your mission, in places that nurture you vision and in things that condition your mind to think bigger. Be careful whom you respect when you’re floating low and be cautious whom you disrespect when you’re flying high.
4. Law of adversity
If it’s worth having it’s worth almost losing. Challenges are invariably going to show up as you pursue your dream, but only to keep you on top of your game. Dreamers embrace the adversity that comes as a result of following their heart because they recognize that nothing in life happens to them, it happens for them.
Accept adversity as apart of the recipe of an uncommon dream and it will be the thing that propels you into success. Without trials you will not know how to value the people, places and experiences that your dreams will bring into your life. The Law of adversity is as simple or as exhausting as you choose for it to be.
“Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly.” -Langston Hughes
5. Law of mentorship
A mentor is one of the most valuable resources you are able to tap into. Why? Mentors are carriers of information. The majority of the challenges you are faced with on the day-to-day basis are only a result of not having enough information. Lets take money for example. Who doesn’t want to make more of it? Of course you do! So you do your best to attend the finest university to eventually find a job that will pay you not enough so you take on two or three side jobs and overwhelm yourself to the point of exhaustion. Sound familiar?
The story you make up about yourself at this point is that you have a “financial problem.” False! There is no such thing as financial problem, only a wisdom problem. Mentorship is all you’re missing. The key is to find mentors who are thriving in the areas of your life in which you’d like to improve upon. If you’re reading this article, chances are great you’re a beholder of an uncommon dream and so you have a greater responsibility not only to take on mentors but secondly and most importantly take action on the information that is shared with you.
Some examples of those who have been mentored and mentors to individuals with uncommon dreams: Mahatma Gandhi mentor to Nelson Mandela, Denzel Washington mentored by Sidney Poitier, Christian Dior mentor to Yves Saint Laurent, Michelle Robinson mentor to Barack Obama, Ralph Waldo Emerson mentor to Henry David Thoreau, Audrey Hepburn mentor to Elizabeth Taylor and the list goes on. When are you going to join the greats?
6. Law of questions
There is no such thing as a stupid question. I know you’ve heard that before! Still to not ask questions is just silly of you. Questions are not just good for finding answers, but also allow you to access resources, solve problems, reach agreements, demonstrate humility, eliminate confusion and acquire knowledge. To make an uncommon dream come true you have to get good at asking uncommon questions- that only make sense, right? Here are some brave and interesting questions I invite you to ask people you come into contact with.
7. Law of relationships
What if I were to promise you that you are only one relationship away from everything you’ve ever wanted in life? Well, its true. Relationships are everything, but not all relationships are created equal. Human beings are genetically wired to be in relationship and connect with one another; the challenge is connecting with the right people, your people. Uncommon dreams are much like small children, the environment in which they are raised in largely determines how much they develop or don’t develop.
The fundamental reason why uncommon dreams are not realized is because we choose to spend too much time with “not our people.” What’s important to keep in mind is that sometimes you don’t actually find your people, they find you. They will be the ones who celebrate your differences, who speak life into in every interaction and most importantly they are conscious of creating an environment for your uncommon dream to thrive.
Here is a video to go along with the article:
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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.
Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.
Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.
Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.
However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.
Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:
1. Unconscious Sabotage
Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.
This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.
Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.
This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.
3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma
4. A strong need for control
5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained
What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?
There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:
- Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
- Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
- Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
- Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.
It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.
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