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How A Broken Heart Can Make You Believe In A Higher Purpose




Have you ever had your heart smashed into pieces? We all have. Sadly for me, recently, it was my turn to remember what it’s like to have a broken heart. I experienced the end of a long-term relationship with a very special girl.

Reflecting back on the situation, I realised that there had to be a reason for this to happen; there had to be a higher purpose for me. While it’s too soon to fully understand the situation, I am choosing to take the positive road.

It’s easy to get caught up in the emotion and the sadness. In the end, sadness is a choice that we can choose to make. I have decided not to act out the way most people go through breakups and try to put an entirely different spin on it.

What if the only two people that understand the pain are the person I was in the relationship with and me? What if we could both help each other through the pain because we are the only two people on the planet, at this point in time, who are in the exact same situation?

I decided this was the best way to deal with the situation. The best panacea to the pain was to focus my energy on the other person’s to distract myself from my own pain. Time heals everything.

Below are eight benefits I got from my broken heart that can help you in your life.

1. You’ll realise that your purpose can consume you

The purpose that you have dedicated your life to can consume you. What I learned from my recent breakup is that your purpose is supposed to consume you and if anything gets’s in the way, then it’s a sign to keep going.

What I do here on Addicted2Success has become an obsession. I don’t do it for me; I do it for all of you that spend your time using the advice I am giving you for free, to transform your life, and in turn, inspire others.

So let me lay it all on the line. One of the primary reasons I ended my recent relationship was so that I could keep serving all of you. That’s right! I don’t give an “F” about followers, or money or any of that stuff. I’m here alive, raw and ready to serve all of you. No matter the struggle I will just keep showing up. Showing up is 90% of success.

I will never stop serving all of you until I take my last breathe. Through the blood, sweat, tears, and heartache, I will keep doing what I am doing. This is not some joke to me. It’s all I’ve got, and it’s all I have to give.

If you have had your heart broken you will see, if you look deep enough, that your purpose had something to do with it. See, if the person you’re with doesn’t understand your purpose, then the universe will help you to end the relationship so that you can get back on track.

When you find someone who is willing to support your purpose so that it can consume you, then that’s the person you should marry and live every single day with.

2. A chapter has come to a close in the book of life

Every part of your life is a chapter in the book that is you. When you have your heart broken, it’s just another chapter coming to a close that is meant to happen. No good books have a consistent story of happy experiences.

The best books (and the best lives) are the ones that have the struggles, the sadness, and most of all, the heartbreaks.

I felt the dark clouds assembling over the last few months. Then, the thunder came crashing down a week ago to tell me that I was on the wrong path and that things had to change. Now it’s time for the sun to shine brightly and help me to get to the next phase of life.

I knew a change was coming, and what we have to realise is that a change like a breakup can be the start of something phenomenal.

When one chapter passes, all it means is that a new one is going to begin, and it’s likely to be more positive than the last. What’s the next chapter for me? No idea. All I know for sure is that new chapters create amazing people who go out there and change the world.

New chapters are what all of us need to take things to the next level. I don’t have all the answers, and I don’t know why everything happens. What I do know is that I can give meaning to any outcome both positive and negative, and you have the power to do the same.

3. Your purpose will become clearer

The advantage of a broken heart is that it can decode your purpose further. When you have nobody next to you each day, you will have more time in the silence to be with your thoughts and work out what you were put on this planet for.

Your purpose is the answer to your entire life, and it’s bloody hard to figure out no matter how smart you are, and no matter how many university degrees you have. If what I do on Addicted2Success is part of the reason for my broken heart then could it be a sign that my purpose is becoming clearer?

4. You will react differently to everything

After you have had your heart broken, everything will be different. You won’t see, hear or feel anything the same way again – this is a good thing. Songs will start to sound different even if you have heard them a hundred times before. Movies will suddenly have a different meaning to you than before.

I witnessed this last point first hand. During this difficult time, I went back and watched “The Pursuit Of Happyness.” It was as if I was watching an entirely different movie. It was as if I was the man looking after that little boy and going through a low point in life.

The benefit of having you heart broken is that it raises your emotions. You suddenly become much more aware of how you’re feeling. This gives you the opportunity to change your reactions to things that happen in your life.

5. The phrase “nothing lasts forever” becomes a reality

Rather than look back on all the sad memories from your relationship, you’re better of realising that nothing lasts forever. Breakups have the power to show you that no matter what, nothing lasts forever. Everything on Earth grows and then dies at some point.

You’re better off enjoying the good parts of your life while they’re happening, rather than trying to live in this false world where everything stays the same and where you live with the same person for eternity.

Wake up every morning and be grateful for the person you’re with. Looking back, I wish I was more grateful for what I had at different times in my life. I can’t change the past but what I can do is create the future and practice gratitude daily.

6. No one has all the answers including me

It’s easy to put people that we follow on social media on some imaginary pedestal. Somehow, people think I have all the answers and that I’m perfect. This couldn’t be further from the truth, and my recent breakup is proof of that.

I have every little bit of imperfection that everyone else has. I am no smarter or no dumber than the next person. As easy as it can be to think that people that write for websites like Addicted2Success have some crazy superpower, we don’t. We’re normal just like you.

There is no influential or motivational person who hasn’t experienced a breakup or divorce (even Tony Robbins has been married multiple times).

7. You will realise that money doesn’t fix real problems

Think about this point very carefully. Even the largest amount of money in the world can’t help heal your broken heart. Only you can fix the damage and pick up the pieces. The greatest resource you have is your mind, and so you should help expand it every day.

You can throw as much money as you want at another person but that will never make them love you. The only thing that will make someone love you is the skill of giving everything you have, even when you’ve got nothing left.

Someone can only love you when you love yourself and what you do for others. Love and your life’s purpose is all you’ve got. There is nothing else, and the world is not complex when you understand this fact. Stop chasing money and start following your purpose, and giving love at the same time.

8. You will see the parts of yourself you need to work on

A romantic relationship is really just a true reflection of you. All the flaws that you deem the other person to have, and everything that goes wrong in a relationship, says more about you than anything else.

In my own situation, I realised I can be selfish, overly productive to the point of madness, and completely and utterly obsessed, and addicted to success (hence the reason I’m probably on this site in the first place).

The strange thing about the obsession of success is that high achievers seem to all suffer from this problem. Two modern day self-help phenomenon’s – Lewis Howe’s and Tim Ferriss – are both single. When one part of your life is very successful, the chances are, another part of your life suffers.

Having your heart broken gives you the opportunity to reassess who you are and the areas of your life that still need work. It’s not about the other person it’s about you.

***Final Thought***

Through the darkest times in your life, there is always a little bit of sunshine that pokes through the cracks. As I write this article, through all the pain, Addicted2Success reveals the first photos of the school that Pencils Of Promise is building with the $50k USD that the Addicted2Success community raised at the end of last year. Acts of kindness like this are what real love is all about.

How has a broken heart affected your life? Did anything positive come out of it? Let me know in the comments section below or on my website or my Facebook. I would really love to hear from you all.

Tim is best known as a long-time contributor on Addicted2Success. Tim's content has been shared millions of times and he has written multiple viral posts all around personal development and entrepreneurship.You can connect with Tim through his website



  1. Avatar


    Jun 23, 2016 at 1:14 am

    Great Article!
    Went through the rough patch myself of a broken heart. Long-term relationship that both of us knew was toxic, and it had an effect on all aspects of my life. I lost friends, family, any sort of motivation, and it caused me to lose a job. After losing the job, I ended the relationship, even though it was one of the hardest things that I have ever done, moved into a CHEAP apartment to save money, and spent 3 months living my dream of traveling through Europe. A few weeks into my trip, as a happy and easy-going person, I met someone new, realized what I was missing out on in a relationship, proposed within 8 weeks of knowing her, and have been happily married living on the other side of the planet for almost 2 years!

    Life throws lots at you, and the biggest thing that I have learned from my experiences is that while life may be tough now, keep at it, and do what makes you happy, things are going to get better.

    Positive attitudes in any situation are KEY!

    • Avatar

      Tim Denning

      Jun 23, 2016 at 7:30 pm

      Thanks Tyler for the kind words. Your story sounds a lot harder than mine that’s for sure. I love that you never gave up and used travel as a way to rediscover where your life was heading. Glad everything is alright now and appreciate you sharing your thoughts with all of us.

      Cheers mate

  2. Avatar

    Thea Dunlap

    Jun 22, 2016 at 3:03 am

    Wow this post really caught my eye. What a better way to channel that broken heart in to something positive. Thanks for sharing this.

    • Avatar

      Tim Denning

      Jun 22, 2016 at 4:19 am

      No problem Thea thank you for your thoughts.

  3. Avatar


    Jun 22, 2016 at 2:08 am

    Another portion of raw wisdom I can totally benefit from having at my breakfast.

    Yep, many of us suffered from broken heart moments and I am with you here. The girl I was with in a long-term relationship, broke my heart twice (hence th elesson if you break up it most likely means you should not return to that person, but I learned that hard way), leaving me with nothing but pain inside. It was one of the most difficult period of my time as I lost my job, friends, money, relationship and more importantly, my sanity. But it was one of the most beautiful and important moment in my life as well, as I was provided with the opportunity to start from scratch and change everything. Only later on I realized how lucky I was to end those relationship and be bale to grow as a person. Before I was drowning into swamp and universe took care of me and helped. It took me time to let it go, forget and eventually forgive that girl, but it will come to you too, Tim. It certainly will.

    Now I like your aproach towards sadness, that this is only but choice we can make. It’s all about our focus and how we can switch it. It gives you more attention and require a lot more awareness to not simply reflect on what happens in your daily life, but to consciously create your life. Nothing lasts forever is the great truth, and as I discovered (or re-learned) this with my deleted files, your life gives you the chance to have this lesson as well.

    I am now practice appreciation more and more, looking for mythoughts and feelings to get caught into trap, and you know, the struggles are the most helpful ally here and a good reminder. You spoke about how you can see things different now and how some things become clearer and this is exactly what I realized yesterday as well! Once I quit the pitty party regarding my deleted docs I felt re-charged, emotionally and got some extra energy to run my day. It sounds nearly ridiculous but this little struggle inspired me to keep going and have my mood up! Reading your article now I can sense you may experience similar phenomenon or at least near to it.

    You may not appear the superhero in the usual meaning of this term, but you are super human, Tim, strong and ever changing and ever growing being who seek the opportunity to be the greatest version of himself every single day. I was thinking how can I cheer you up and help with something, but you don’t even need this, and in your dark times you are even stronger than usual and always here to land us a hand (or two) and inspire the world once again, no matter what. You got this, my man. Just keep going and don’t you ever give up.

    Whatever happened, happened for a reason. Accept it and let it go. Life is beautiful and you’re unique being. Enjoy the journey. You will get to destination one day.

    Peace and blessings, my friend. Stay strong and healthy. Much love to you!~
    Appreciate your desire to share this experience, thank you so very much!

    • Avatar

      Tim Denning

      Jun 22, 2016 at 2:41 am

      Toño I have never been called super human so thank you so much. I had a tear in my eye as I read your very kind note. I love the fact that you go out of your way to share your experiences and you don’t leave anything out. You have really motivated me today my friend and I am very grateful for that. Lets catch up soon and thanks again 🙂

  4. Avatar

    Charlene Rhinehart

    Jun 21, 2016 at 8:38 pm

    Wow! The title of this article immediately caught my attention and I had to push everything aside in order to give this my full attention. It’s like you were taking the words right out of my head. First, I want to thank you for having the COURAGE to share such a heart-breaking feeling that impacts everyone. Thank you for turning the table and adding a positive, purpose-driven perspective.

    These words stood out, “See, if the person you’re with doesn’t understand your purpose, then the universe will help you to end the relationship so that you can get back on track…When you find someone who is willing to support your purpose so that it can consume you, then that’s the person you should marry and live every single day with. A change like a break-up can be the start of something phenomenal.” This post just filled me up! Thank you again for sharing, Tim!

    • Avatar

      Tim Denning

      Jun 21, 2016 at 9:26 pm

      Thank you Charlene for your continuous kind words and wisdom. Glad you enjoyed the post.

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