Life
A Letter To My Former Servant Self
Dear Tim, I’m writing to remind you of your former servant self. Before we go on I have great news:
You will go from being the servant to the master one-day soon.
It may not look like it right now, but all of this struggle you have gone through will mean something. For you to be able to grow into the person that I know you are going to become, you must see the dark times. How can you talk about changing your life if you haven’t first done so yourself?
I know you may feel like you are reacting to everything around you rather than creating your destiny, but that’s because of your conditioning. Your circumstances and friends have conditioned you to believe that life happens to you.
Me – being your wiser self – knows that this way of thinking will disappear as you mature. Trust me. If you could see what I now see, you’d be impressed.
“Tim make a commitment to change one thing”
To go from being the servant to the master of your destiny Tim, you must first make a small change. This is where you always went wrong before. You tried to make humongous changes that made you feel overwhelmed. What happened next was that fear got the best of you.
“Fear became like a demon that always wanted to see you lose just as you were about to score from the three-point line, in the basketball match of your life”
It was like you were about to take the shot and then got crippled by a sudden illness that made you sick.
Having seen how this plays out Tim, I need you to start by making a small change first. Try these things:
1. Go for a short walk every day
2. Give up one small addiction like chocolate
3. Commit to 15 mins of reading per day
These activities may seem pointless: they’re not. You have to try a different strategy and start heading down a new path. These new habits are small so that you can’t possibly fail. What will happen over time is that they will become longer, more in depth and will lead to even more new activities.
“Tim we all experience pain”
Even Richard Branson has days where he can’t be bothered. It’s hard to believe I know. All of us have bad days where we look horrible, feel dreadful, or are uninspired. None of us are perfect and in fact Tim we are all broken in some way.
It’s this brokenness that makes us individual and shows the world our true beauty. Perfection is ugly! There I said it Tim and you may not have wanted to hear that. I’m here to tell you the truth and not sugar coat things for you. That’s another thing (sugar) that you’ll give up in the future, but shhh ☺
“Put yourself out there Tim”
You’ve hidden for so long Tim behind your so-called success. You’ve never revealed the struggle you’ve gone through and only shown people your good side. The thing is Tim that for you to go from being the servant to the master of your destiny, you have to share what you’ve learned.
I know you think your advice is dumb and I’m telling you that you’re wrong. I’m your future self remember so trust me on this point. Those things you called failure, those fears you have, all the things you didn’t try, the world is dying to hear about it. Why? Well because your fellow human beings have the same struggles and they want to know how and why you haven’t given up yet.
What you don’t realize is that you’re actually more successful than you think. There are plenty of other people who would have given up long ago or settled for a mediocre life. Even though you are going through a low point, you are not going to allow yourself to be happy with failure.
It’s this stubbornness that you thought was your weakness, which is your true gift. This stubbornness is going to lead you towards becoming obsessed with helping others.
“Tim stop being selfish”
One of the key reasons you are still a servant Tim and not a Jedi master is because you haven’t discovered the gift of why you were given life. Let me whisper it in your ear:
“You were put here to serve others”
That’s it, Tim. What you’ve done wrong up until now is only worried about yourself. By worrying about yourself, you’ve become obsessed with your own happiness. You’ve ignored everyone else’s feelings and dismissed everyone else’s thoughts.
You’re living in your own world which involves living full time in your head. Your head tells you lies and you listen to them because you only focus on yourself. It’s time to be brave Tim and go out into this world to serve someone other than you!
You are the reason you’re still serving as a servant rather than creating the masterful life you’ve always wanted. You haven’t been able to visualize an empowering future because there is no one in it to join you for the ride. What fun is a future without a team of people to enjoy the party with?
“Tim, everyone around you is affecting the person you want to grow into”
I know you think those cool kids around you are good for you, but they’re not. Every person in your life Tim is either contributing to your growth towards becoming a master or subtracting from it. To discover who you want to become you need to surround yourself with people who have done stuff.
Let me be more concise: you need to surround yourself with people that walk into a room and get a standing ovation for the outstanding person they have become. To start with, read some autobiographies of the greats in business, politics and sport.
Once you know what greatness looks like, go out and find people who demonstrate these values and accomplishments.
One of these people is going to become your mentor. The good news is they will help guide you. The bad news is they are going to make you work ten times harder and hold you accountable. You’re lazy when it comes down to it Tim so this will be good for you. No more Netflix and pizza every Friday.
“Tim the answers don’t all reveal themselves at once”
This journey from being a servant, to becoming a master Tim, is a road full of fog and hidden dangers. You’ll only ever be able to see clearly for a few hundred miles. The rest of the road will be hidden from your sight.
You’ll need a vision to help imagine it and then you’ll need to take action to uncover it. What you’ve always done poorly is tried to have all the answers before committing to a new goal. The thing is Tim you can’t pre-plan the entire future.
Stuff is going to get in the way and take you off course once in a while. These distractions will consistently make you check in with yourself to ensure you are putting your time into goals that light you up.
Embrace the detours because that’s where you will find some of the answers. You may even find love in these detours too. Don’t tell anyone I told you that buddy. That one’s just for you.
“Tim, don’t forget about now”
You want to know Tim what the difference is between the servant and the master? It’s the Zen state called right now. Living in the past and living in the future is a dangerous place to operate from. All that fear you and I know you have will be abolished if you come back to now.
That’s what you’ve been doing wrong all this time. You’re so focused on the past and the future where you can’t control what happens. By not being in control, you fall for the servant life.
Control of your life becomes possible again when you focus on right now. Add some meditation and you’re well on your way from leaving that servant life behind that you hate so much.
“Tim, don’t settle for second best”
When it comes to romance Tim, you’ve always settled for second best. Right at the start, you get told some impossible problem that a new partner has and you still signup to the pain that follows. Your intuition tells you to say no and find someone else, but you ignore it.
From now on, follow your intuition. If someone tells you something that makes you feel sick and it’s miles away from where you see yourself, don’t pass go and collect $200. There’s no hurry to find the right person even though you like being in love (we all do by the way).
Take a deep breath and find “the one” that makes your heart skip a beat. Find the girl that has the high set of values you are going to one day have for yourself. When that person appears, go all in, love them like you’ve never loved anyone before and show them you care.
Do nice things for them and keep doing those same things well beyond the start of the relationship. Tell them how you feel regularly and be grateful when you find the one. It will happen. I’m your future self remember?
So how does it end for you, Tim?
This is what you’ve been dying to know. I’ve shared all these wisdom bombs with you that have given you a glimpse into your future life.
Unfortunately, Tim, I can’t tell you everything because I need you to go through the failures, broken hearts, false promises, lies, cheating and so on, so that you can develop the armor you will need to become the master and not the servant.
I know that’s not the answer you were hoping for and that’s a good thing. It’s a good thing because I want you to get used to not getting exactly what you want. That’s what those Ivy League rich kids haven’t figured out yet: you don’t get everything you want just because you have lots of money.
You’ve got to earn your new master status and I’m here to tell you that your journey has started. Never give up. You’re gong to achieve wonderful things in your life that you could never have dreamt of. One day, you’ll be giving this advice to someone else. There’s a hint of the future right there.
If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.net
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
-
Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
-
Read quality literature in your free time.
-
Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
-
Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
-
Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
Change Your Mindset
The Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?
Most people chase success only to find emptiness, this model reveals why true happiness lies somewhere else.
In a world driven by rapid technological growth and constant competition, many people unknowingly trade joy for achievement. (more…)
Change Your Mindset
The Secret Daily Routines Behind History’s Most Brilliant Thinkers
Uncover the daily rituals and hidden habits that powered history’s most brilliant minds to success.
Why Daily Rituals Matter
Every great achiever has one thing in common: discipline. Behind the novels, inventions, discoveries, and masterpieces are small, consistent habits repeated daily. (more…)
Finances
From Debt to Financial Independence: A Practical Roadmap Anyone Can Follow
It’s about having control over your money and not letting money control you.
The 21st century has brought incredible opportunities but also new challenges. Rapid technological change, global uncertainty, and shifting lifestyles have made many people think more deeply about financial freedom. (more…)
-
Business4 weeks agoThinking of Buying A Business? These 6 Sectors Quietly Produce the Best Deals
-
Change Your Mindset3 weeks agoWork-Life Balance Isn’t a Myth: Here’s How to Actually Make It Happen
-
Change Your Mindset4 weeks agoThe Four Types of Happiness: Which One Are You Living In?
-
Life3 weeks ago9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
-
Success Advice2 weeks agoInside the TikTok Resume Hack That’s Fooling Recruiters (For Now)
-
Change Your Mindset2 weeks agoThe One Leadership Habit That Separates the Great From the Forgettable
-
Personal Development1 week agoThis Silent Habit Might Be Sabotaging Your Career
-
Business6 days agoWhy Your E-Commerce Fulfilment Is Probably Broken (And How to Fix It)


