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7 Common Things People Regret at the End of Their Lives

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We all have seen people grow old and we know it very well that one day, our time will come too. No one wants to live their lives with regrets at the end. If you do not want to have regrets when you grow old, you should do the best you can when you are young and capable.

Studies have shown that there are a couple of things dying people regret that they did not do when they have the opportunity and when they have the time.

Here are 7 things you can do in life so that you will never regret at the end:

1. Pursue your dreams and accomplish more goals

One of the main reasons people regret when they get old is that they did not go for what they want in life. Everyone has a dream, but not everyone will do something about their dreams. Do you have a dream?

If you do, commit yourself, follow your dreams and pursue them. Set more goals and go all in or all out. You do not have to hold yourself to play safe. So never get regret that you did not go for your dreams or what you want in life. If you want to travel the world, plan and do it. If you want to start a business, create a plan and do it.

 

2. Spend more time with people you care about

Another most common regret when people grow old is that they feel they never spend enough time with people they care about. We are human beings and humans tend to be emotional. We care for other people and we just cannot live alone by ourselves.

If you love someone, tell them. You do not have to wait until it’s too late. Do you have friends that you appreciate? Then say thank you to them and tell them how much you care. And when you care more about those around you, they will return the favor and care more about you.

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words but to live by them.” –John F. Kennedy

3. Express yourself more

Transparency is very important in your relationship, whether it is with your soulmate or with your family members. You should tell them upfront how you feel.

Holding up anger or resentment is not going to do you any good. Anger and resentment can deteriorate your health. Of course, I’m not asking you to pick a fight with people by telling how much you hate them.

However, you should confront your feelings and express them in a more constructive and a positive way. A couple cannot grow their relationship if they hide their feelings from each other. Please understand that this does not only happen to couples, it can happen in every relationship you experience, be it with your colleagues or with your boss.

 

4. Learn and explore more

This is very obvious; to live a fulfilling life without regrets, you must learn and explore more while you can. Do you ever have the urge to learn something new such as a foreign language or how to play guitar? If you have, you should go ahead and explore more. Learn the new skills and try to discover yourself with something new.

It is the moment you experienced in life that counts, not physical items. So do more of things that you love. Discover your passions and follow them. Never wait until you are old only to think that you should have done this or you should have done that. It will be too late by then.

 

5. Take care of your finances

This is one area where most people fail to excel in life. Most people never learn how to take care of their finances; as a result, they live in poverty after they retired. Do not let this happen to you. If you do not want to be broke when you are old, learn to manage your finances right now.

Save consistent each month or save a portion of the income that you receive. Stop spending on items that you don’t really need. No one wants to live in mediocrity and broke when they get old, right? Thus, learn to handle your money now.

 

6. Choose to be happy

Do you know that happiness is a choice? You can choose to be happy or you can choose to feel sad right at this moment. It is simple, you just need to direct your thoughts and emotions. Think about something happy and you will feel happy. On the other hand, when you think about something sad, you will feel depressed almost instantly.

Life is short, you should experience more joy and thrill every day. Every minute you spend thinking about how bad things can be or how depressing your life is, you are wasting the moments you can be happy.

“The purpose of our lives is to be happy.” – Dalai Lama

7. Live to the fullest and never waste time

Bruce Lee once said, “If you love life, don’t waste time, for time is what life is made of”. Stop living in regrets and start making every minute count. When you play, enjoy it to the fullest. When you work, work your best and create a masterpiece out of your work. And when you live, live to the fullest so that you will never regret at the end.

Yesterday was history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift that is why we call it the “present”. So enjoy every moment you can have right now, live today as your last day and make yourself alive again.

Decide today that you are going to live your life with passion. Pursue your dreams, spend more time with people you love, express yourself and explore more, manage your finances, be happy and enjoy every moment you have right now.

What would you add to this list so that you don’t have regrets at the end? Please leave your thoughts in the comment section below!

Want to discover the secrets to unleashing your potential and live a great and successful life? Follow Shawn Lim on his blog, StunningMotivation.com. You can download his guidebook, Active Goal Setting and make your dreams a reality. You can also follow him on Facebook.

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8 Comments

8 Comments

  1. Dawn Davis

    Jan 20, 2017 at 10:01 am

    Thank you for this reminder! It truly is a choice to be ? and I am making that choice everyday! I embrace positivity and repel negativity more and more! So, I don’t even waste time reading things that don’t inspire or inform me?

  2. Sarah Crouch

    Dec 23, 2016 at 10:37 pm

    My mum passed away very recently and I clicked on this link on twitter to see whether there was anything that I thought she regretted. This is a risky game. If I found something I thought that she regressed, how would that have helped me?

    Luckily, my mum possessed a strength and a positivity that I only see in limited people. Luckily I knew that. She overcame some of the most challenging events and a long term illness and still loved and lived more whole heartedly than most. What I honestly believe is that she made the choice to do so, and when you make that choice, nothing can stop you. Good luck everyone. I have been blessed to be close to someone so divine, but I want you all to know that living life to the full and passing over with no regrets is possible to absolutely everyone. I’m learning with you all x

  3. Dustin Vans

    Jul 27, 2016 at 7:17 pm

    You should never dwell on negativity for along period of time,it will only take that time it took to get over away from being happy and enjoying life or achievements.
    (Life Is Good )

  4. Jeannine Carroll

    Jul 26, 2016 at 11:23 am

    Shawn, thank you for this list to get us thinking. My faith is important to me but I find myself constantly working to promote my book or to get more done. Now, I’ve decided to ask myself this question, “Will what I’m doing be important in heaven?” This helps me to focus on what’s really important to me.

  5. Chris

    Jul 26, 2016 at 5:10 am

    Nice article Shawn.

    I have to say “Choose To Be Happy” is the point that I resonate with most. I have been in situations before where I have been down and I was laying the blame on other people. I now realise that it was my choice to be happy. You make your own life, we should choose to fill it with positive thoughts, the rest will follow.

    • Shawn Lim

      Jul 26, 2016 at 7:48 am

      Yea, fill your life with happiness and positive thoughts.
      The clock will tick anyway, so if we’re going to live, we might just live happily. And be bold. 🙂

  6. Shawn Lim

    Jul 23, 2016 at 2:40 pm

    Hi Kim, yes you are right, to go forward and further, we have to forget and forgive. 🙂

  7. Kim Hellyar

    Jul 23, 2016 at 12:27 pm

    Say your sorry to people you know you have wronged or hurt. This helps them move on without wondering why and was it them.

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Life

6 Reasons Why You Should Never Glorify Failure After You’ve Failed

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Many people are ashamed of failure. If they so much as smell a whiff of failure, they quit instantly because the public notices it quickly. But you shouldn’t be ashamed of failure. A lot of people have failed. I’ve failed over and over again in my career, business, relationships and more. Yet, I keep trying because failure isn’t the final verdict. (more…)

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Life

How to Move Forward When All Seems Lost

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A few weeks ago, the relationship of my venture with a long-term client turned rocky. Losing them would mean a huge loss for my business, but it appeared like that’s where we were headed. My mind raced with unpleasant thoughts. Maybe the client had figured out that I couldn’t lead my team well. Maybe I was not good enough to be an entrepreneur. Maybe I was not good enough to do anything.

Why was the world so unfair?! Within moments, my anxiety had shot through the roof and my heart was racing faster than an F1 car engine. But I know I’m not the only one who feels like this.

Why Problems Overwhelm Us

As human beings, we’re good at solving problems, so they shouldn’t stress us out. Yet, they do just that. Why?

Consider some of these situations in life. When a relationship is headed for troubled waters, we wonder whether our partner loves us anymore. Our mind unearths memories of when we got dumped or rejected. We blame ourselves for falling for the wrong people and tell ourselves that we’re not worth receiving love.

How do you think the relationship will steer after that? If we cannot stick to a diet, we think of other times when we gave up. We remember what people said about things that we couldn’t do and ask ourselves, “were they right?” We tell ourselves that we don’t have what it takes to succeed at anything.

Do you think we’ll find the grit to stick to the diet after this? So here we are… thinking we’re not good enough to be entrepreneurs, to be loved, to get promoted, or to achieve our personal goals. Notice a pattern yet? We move in the wrong direction. The destination is to achieve the goal. And unless we stop giving into emotions and start addressing situations, we’ll keep failing to get there.

Negative emotions (and even extremely positive ones) blur our vision. The more we focus on them, the deeper we go into how we feel. We either get angry because things aren’t the way we want them to be, or get paralyzed by the fear of the worst possible outcome. This means we pull away from the one thing we must do to set things right — take action.

“If you can’t sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there and worrying. It’s the worry that gets you, not the loss of sleep.” – Dale Carnegie

How to Take Action in the Face of Problems

Most human beings are good at solving problems. Where we get blindsided is at diagnosing the right problem. To diagnose the right problem, we must address the situation instead of emotions. We must see things for what they are, collect facts on what we’re worrying about, and then ask ourselves, “What should I do next?”

In his book “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, Dale Carnegie wrote: “Neither you nor I nor Einstein nor the Supreme Court of the United States is brilliant enough to reach an intelligent decision on any problem without first getting the facts.”

To address the tricky situation with my client, I took the following three steps:

1. First, I acknowledged the feeling

Solving a problem doesn’t mean ignoring emotions. It’s important to acknowledge how you feel because it reveals the path, but domesticating your emotions is more important. I acknowledged how I felt by saying, “I feel anxious because the client might not want to work with us anymore and this will be a financial loss for us.”

Note how I said “I feel anxious” and not “I’m a loser.” If I had given into negative chatter, I wouldn’t have uncovered the direction to move in (the part after “because”). This is why domesticating emotions is crucial.

2. Next, I prepared for the worst

We often run from our worst fears rather than facing them despite knowing that the worst outcome rarely comes true. The result is that we stay stuck in fear instead of pushing beyond it. And we never discover what we’re really capable of, which sucks.

In my case, the worst meant losing the client. It would hurt but it was the truth. However, we could get more clients. Plus we already had other clients who helped us pay the bills. In other words, I wouldn’t have to live on the street.

The moment I accepted this, a huge weight got lifted off my chest. This prepared me for the third and final step.

“Expect the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes.” – Zig Ziglar

3. Lastly, I examined the situation

Examining a situation means setting aside your emotional baggage and focusing on facts. When you trust that you’ll be okay, you become better at diagnosing the real problem. Once I felt lighter, I could see things clearly.

I used the 5 Whys Technique (asking “why” five times) to figure out the real reason for the client’s dissatisfaction. Then I collected data on the issue and on what we had previously delivered.

Finally, I reached out to the CEO of the client and held a detailed and constructive discussion based on my findings. Within four days, the CEO and I were back to the way things were before.

The best way to prepare for tomorrow is to give today your best. I’m not sure whether the issue with the client got resolved for good or whether the client won’t pack up and leave one day. However, I am sure that I’m prepared to handle such cases better today than I was yesterday.

Control your emotions instead of letting them run amok. Accept things for what they are instead of what you want them to be. Be realistic instead of delusional. Address the situation instead of succumbing to emotions.

Don’t preempt what lies ten miles ahead and get paralyzed by fear. Address what lies clearly in front of you and keep moving. One day you’ll be surprised about how close to your destination you are.

How do you move forward when all hope seems to be lost? Share your advice below!

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8 Effective Tips to Improve Your Emotional Wellbeing

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You know what they say, “Health Is Wealth”. But, more often than not, we only mean it in the context of physical health. There’s no question that being fit is the world’s greatest treasure. Unfortunately, not a lot of us take time out to look after our emotional health and wellbeing.

Let’s not forget – it’s ‘Mind Over Matter’. So, if you are able to take control of your emotions, thoughts, how you feel through the day and how you respond to myriad situations; there’s nothing quite like it. When you become the master of your emotions; health, prosperity, and basically all good things are bound to follow you.

With that said, here are 8 surefire ways that will improve your emotional wellbeing:

1. Practice Mindfulness

Half the time, we don’t even know what we’re thinking or how we’re feeling. That’s because we let our minds operate on autopilot. It’s time to take control of your mind. Be aware of what and how you feel throughout the day. The upside to this practice is that you can detect negative emotions right on the onset and quickly change them and their corresponding feeling.

Feelings of anger, jealousy, hatred; they are not good for the mind, soul, or the body. Paying close attention to the spectrum of emotions you experience throughout the day, will help you detect the negative ones and kick them away before they fester deep enough to take away your happiness and emotional health.

2. Stay Physically Active

As you engage in physical activities, your brain produces a whole bunch of feel-good hormones such as endorphins and dopamine. These hormones are what causes the ‘elated’ or ‘euphoric’ feeling. Being physically active uplifts your mood and your outlook towards life. It readies you to take the challenges more head-on instead of becoming overwhelmed by the littlest of inconvenience.

You are better able to analyze tough situations and take a more proactive rather than a reactive approach. It’s no question physical health is in direct proportion with emotional health. A healthy mind resides in a healthy body and vice versa.

“Caring for the mind is as important and crucial as caring for the body. In fact, one cannot be healthy without the other.” – Sid Garza-Hillman

3. Get Sufficient Sleep

Ever noticed how you feel depressed and cranky, and just out of focus the day you fail to get a good night’s sleep? Well, if you fail to get sufficient sleep for a couple of days, you are bound to feel more depressed, cranky and eventually more prone to a host of negative emotions. Research shows that sleep deprivation sends amygdala – our brain’s emotional response center into overdrive.

Amygdala controls our immediate emotional responses. When it becomes overactive, we become more reactive rather than active. We become more irritable, angry and anxious. A good night’s sleep is vital to improving your emotional wellbeing.

4. Develop a New Hobby

Learn to swim. Try arts and crafts. How about painting? Swimming is a ‘happy’ activity. You get to make new friends and stay fit. Arts and crafts, as we all know, tends to have a relaxing effect on the mind and the nerves.

Just the process of creating something from scratch makes you confident and gets those creative juices flowing. Similarly, painting helps you express yourself. All these factors together create a ‘happy you’. The one who likes to engage in new things instead of resisting change or difficult situations.

5. Eat Healthy

Ever heard of the phrase, “You are what you eat”? Well, it’s true to the last syllable. When you eat foods rich in salt, sodium, fat – you are bound to feel lethargic. It takes longer for the body to digest such foods. That means the body is forced to deprive organs of blood and use it for the digestion purpose.

Result? You become lazy, moody, not ready to take any responsibility which leads to feeling cranky and irritable. On the other hand, eating fibrous vegetables, fruits, salads, and complex sugars keeps you upbeat and healthy.

6. Laugh Your Heart Out

Laughter is the best medicine. That is why they have a dedicated ‘laughter session’ in yoga studios. You don’t even have to mean it. The simple act of spreading your cheeks and pretending to laugh sends a signal to your body that you are happy.

And what happens when you are happy? Your brain releases happy hormones like dopamine, serotonin and what not. In fact, many studies have gone so far as to stipulate that laughter alone is capable of treating all kinds of physical ailments. Why should emotional ailments be any different?

7. Try Relaxation Techniques

‘’Visualization technique’’ where you imagine yourself in a happy place is a surefire way to calm your nerves if you find yourself distressed. You may also try praying to elate yourself. Praying is good for the mind and the soul.

Controlled breathing or ‘biofeedback technique’ are some other relaxation techniques that can tame how you feel and even your bodily functions. Try surrounding yourself with aromatherapy or scented candles because the smell is a big factor in governing how we feel.

“Positive emotional energy is the key to health, happiness and wellbeing. The more positive you are, the better your life will be in every area.” – Brian Tracy

8. Count Your Blessings

We all have so much to be thankful for. It could be a friend who stands by you or a happy family. Good health. Financial freedom. Make a list of all the things that you feel grateful for in your life. If it’s a person, be sure to communicate your feelings and express your gratitude.

You will feel so much happier. Happiness is the diet of a healthy mind and an intelligent emotional response mechanism. You could also try writing a poem or simply expressing your gratitude through the power of prayers.

There are so many ways to become emotionally intelligent and not one of them requires any investment or special skills. Practically anyone and everyone can do it. All you need is the will and the desire.

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How You Can Use the Power of Gratitude to Your Advantage

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The word gratitude has been tossed around, but do you know exactly what it means or how to implement it into your life? Someone has probably told you in your life, “Express more gratitude.” Well, that sounds like a great idea, but if you don’t know what gratitude is, how can you fully express it in your life? It’s a concept that once you grasp, it will change your life. (more…)

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