Connect with us

Life

5 Mental Barriers to Real Greatness Only You Can Remove

Published

on

5 Mental Barriers to Real Greatness Only You Can Remove

There is nothing more inspiring than witnessing greatness, and watching those who have dedicated their entire life to a craft. Most haven’t thought about greatness, because they don’t think it’s possible. In a time of insurmountable change, overwhelming complexity and relentless competition, going after greatness is a viable way to rise above the noise.

Most people grow up fitting in, because that’s what is expected of them. You get reprimanded and disciplined if you speak up, act out or try to be “different” in school. Well, in entrepreneurship and business, being different is how you separate yourself from the herd. By that, I mean stand out versus fit in and differentiating yourself instead of comparing yourself to others.

Earl Nightingale was one of the first business philosophers of our time said something I’ll never forget: “If you were setting out to accomplish something and you had no role models to emulate, you could get a good start by looking at what everybody else was doing – and not doing it.

How do you know if you’re even built for greatness? And if you are, can you handle being the best?

Here are the five reasons why, sadly, most entrepreneurs will never reach greatness:

1. They don’t love failure

Through adversity comes greatness, and through failure comes a sharper perspective, but only if you analyze the experience. Success won’t happen unless you’re willing to sacrifice and suffer. How you respond to failure determines your success. A high tolerance for stress and failure is a skill successful people are highly paid for. You must understand failure is a crucial part of growth, and is a good thing if approached with the right perspective.

When you understand failure is a good thing, you take it on with courage and confidence. You become wiser and can make more educated decisions when you have a higher understanding about what you have failed in, whether it’s life or business. You must stay loyal to yourself through failure. Don’t be too tough on yourself during failure. You must always be building your confidence. Most start beating themselves up, but the select few leverage failure for even greater success.

“Failure doesn’t mean the game is over, it means try again with experience.” – Len Schlesinger

2. They take too many opinions

We learn so much from what we hear, and those dedicated to greatness are very selective listeners. A lot of entrepreneurs are quick to take opinions from anybody giving them. Start listening to voices of value, and to those who have the experience, ideas, and reputation you’re striving to emulate. Listen to people you would trade places with, and listen to people who have already experienced the success you’re aiming for.

Become an observer of those who are winning and those who are losing. Take mental notes of the habits, attitudes, perspectives of the people achieving and living a good life. Learn all about your industry, your subject, and study what the top people do. A smart person learns from their mistakes, as all leaders do, but those who operate at a world-class level shorten their learning curve by learning from others people’s mistakes and not wasting time making the same ones.

 

3. They can’t give up the need to be liked

Do you care what people think about you? It shouldn’t matter if you stay true to yourself and live authentically. The reason most don’t take risks, live on the edge or push the envelope is the fear of what others might think of them. If you want to live the life you truly deserve, the one of significance and fulfillment, you must give up the need to be liked by everybody. As Will Smith said, “Trying to get everybody to like you is the most common chosen road to mediocrity.”

The more you fear people, the less effective you will be. Somebody who worries about the opinions of others will live in fear and never take action. Those who are so confident in who they are, and what they believe in, will take massive action because the opinions of others don’t affect their mindset. Only when you give up the need to be liked can you live a life of success and significance. Stay fearless in everything you do, and remember, comparison is the root of all misery.

 

4. They aren’t obsessed

Warren Buffet summed it up best: “Obsession is the DNA of greatness.” Obsession is the hallmark of genius. If you aren’t obsessed with what you do, greatness will remain a fantasy. Have a deep passion for your craft, because your passion will keep you going when you feel like giving up. Genius is not genetics. It’s persistence in a specific craft, along with deep daily practice.

Be a specialist, and whether it’s your business, your sport or a specific skill, stay obsessed. Don’t try to be great at 50 things. Be obsessed about the few things that can really move your life and business forward. Remember, “Never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about.”

“Obsessed is a word the lazy use to describe dedicated.”

5. They hang around toxic people

If you want to become legendary, study legends. A lot of people talk about greatness, but hang around mediocrity. The people around you should energize you, not deplete your energy. Make sure you’re around people who challenge you and hold you accountable instead of letting you off the hook. This is one of the greatest ways to increase your peace of mind, energy and motivation.

Say goodbye to the people who suck up your energy and don’t make you feel exceptional. Your standards will rise and fall based on who you associate with. You won’t believe how much stress is released once you decide to minimize your time with those who complain, play the victim role and make excuses.

What mental barriers are stopping you from being successful? Would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below!

Peter Voogd is a 2x Best Selling Author, and the founder of the prestigious Game Changers Academy.  He’s been labeled the leading authority on Gen Y leadership. He’s been featured in Forbes, Entrepreneur Magazine, inc.com, Time, HuffPost along with many other international publications.  He’s trained over  6,000 young entrepreneurs personally and his podcasts, videos, websites, and social media reaches over 1 million people monthly.  He’s known for his No BS approach to life and entrepreneurship.

Advertisement
5 Comments

5 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Life

The Imbalanced Problem with Work/Life Balance

Balancing is for your checkbook, gymnastics, and nutrition; not for your people’s work/life ratio.

Published

on

Image Credit: Canva

Balance…it requires an equal distribution of value between two or more subjects to maintain steady composure and equitable proportionality. (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

How to Find the Courage to Start New

Change is scary, but it’s a normal part of life.

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

It’s 2023, a new year, new you, right? But how do we start over? How do we make the changes in our lives that we crave so much to see?  (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

Failing is More Important Than Succeeding

Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures.

Published

on

Image Credit: Unsplash

People often consider failure a stigma.  Society often doesn’t respect the people who failed and avoids and criticizes their actions. Failure is an integral part of life as life is incomplete without failures. Not to have endeavored is worse than failing in life as at some stage of your life you regret not having tried in your life.  (more…)

Continue Reading

Life

5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

Published

on

Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
Continue Reading

Trending