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4 Things You Can Do To Live Your Life Without Any Regrets

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4 Things You Can Do To Live Your Life Without Any Regrets

Today, I live my life to the fullest. I do what I love to do, I am not afraid to take big steps, and I never let a little bit of doubt and fear stop me from getting to where I’m going.

I take risks and I literally create and shape-shift my own destiny.

This wasn’t always the case. There was the time when my regret had almost turned into a chronic depression and suffering. Living a life full of regret because of the things you did, or were afraid to do in the past, is really not a wise way to live.

Now, I am just a regular person like you. I am not a self-improvement guru with 10 New York Times best-selling books who claims to give you the salvation to all your inner demons.

I will just share the insights gained through my limited experience which might prove beneficial and useful to many people reading this article, including you.

But before we begin, please tell me…Are you waking up each morning with the feeling that your life is useless? Do you think that there’s no more purpose for you on this planet? If you do, this short and yet powerful post, might be the wake-up-call you’ve been longing for!

Enough fluff, let’s dive in!

 

Have You Asked Yourself What “To Regret” Actually Means?

Of course, you will find a zillion different answers to this question if you only look for them. I’ll tell you what it means to me so that you can try and reflect in your own life.

There’s a very famous quote from Les Brown that I happen to love and I’d like to share it with you…It goes like this:

The graveyard is the richest place on earth! It is the richest place because it is here that you will find all the hopes and dreams that were never fulfilled, the books that were never written, the songs that were never sung, the inventions that were never shared, the cures that were never discovered, and all because someone was too afraid, too scared to take that first step, keep with the problem, or determined to carry out their dream.

“Never regret anything you have done with a sincere affection; nothing is lost that is born of the heart.” – Basil Rathbone

I think that this incredible and forever true quote, gives the perfect answer and enlightenment to everyone trying to live a regret-free life. To regret deeply means to have the feelings of deep remorse and guilt because you’ve wasted your life. It is a feeling of nostalgia mixed with sadness and unhappiness because you never went after your dreams only because you let fear, doubt and worry stop you.

It can also be connected to the things that you did in the past that you weren’t supposed to do. It doesn’t end there. Mistreating someone and breaking their heart, cheating and being disloyal, missing that once in a lifetime opportunity for your career, all of these and many more contribute even more fuel to the fire.

Well I don’t want you to ever experience this demon. I was suffering with the constant feeling of regret for quite a while but eventually I learned how to rise like a phoenix from the ashes and do the things I always wanted to do.

That’s exactly why I’m sharing my message with you.

 

1. Can you overcome emotional pain from your past?

Understand this – what happened, happened. The past cannot be changed, so STOP wasting your life thinking about it!

Why? Why? It is so, so simple, and yet, WHY do so many people have a difficult time coping with this truth? We hold onto that past like a blind man holds onto his stick. We’re letting something that doesn’t exist in the real world, something that has ended and now lives only in our imagination, to destroy our lives.

It is all about controlling what we can control, and gaining wisdom to accept the things that we cannot change.

You can control your thoughts, your emotions, your behavior, your actions and your attitude, but you can’t control someone else’s thoughts and actions. You can control what you do today, and the next day, and the next month, and the next year, but you cannot control what happened in the past.

So start focusing! Don’t waste your energy and life in those “should have and should not haves” or “if only(s)”!

If only I married Tom and not Jack. I should have taken that promotion. I shouldn’t have moved to London. She shouldn’t have left me. I should have gone on a diet. If only I proposed to her that summer.

If only I am wise enough, to stop this madness, right here, and right now, and do something useful with my life!” – That’s the only “if only” you should be concerned with!

Accept your past exactly as it is and start learning from your mistakes. Don’t use this as an excuse for your future wretchedness!

If it is so hard for you to accept and let go of the past, here’s a very good technique that works time and time again.

Close your eyes and travel back in time to the event that holds you back. See the picture that bothers you very clearly! Even if it is very painful and you can’t stand it, just do it. Then, start imagining how this event or situation is a picture drawn onto a big canvas. Everything around the picture is black. See it very clearly.

Next, start seeing the picture getting smaller and smaller as it was pushing away from you. See it going in the distance and slowly fading in the blackness.

When it is completely gone, say this affirmation to yourself – “I let go of my past completely! It no longer bothers me, and from this moment on, I am in complete control over my thoughts and feelings. I faithfully learn from my past mistakes, and I’ll never let this happen in the future. Thank You!

That’s a very powerful NLP technique actually.

“Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.” – Hermann Hesse

2. Checking your references

I suggest that from now on, you do at least that – check your references. Most of the time, we’re not even aware of where our beliefs came from. We tend to think and behave in a certain way, and all of this is done by habit without any conscious thought.

Let me tell you a very short story that I read somewhere on the net…

Once upon a time, there was a very old monk living in the monastery and working faithfully every day. He was dedicated to serving God and his entire life he was trying to live in enlightenment and compassion. His job was to translate ancient texts which were just copies of the original ancient wisdom. They were doing that with centuries and passed the tradition from one generation of monks to the next one.

This monk was doing this his entire life for more than 70 years. One day, he suddenly got a strong desire to read some of the original documents. Although he was sure the copies of the copies were identical to the original text, some curiosity and intuition made him dig deep in the ancient papers.

A week later, the other monks found him half-dead, lying and weeping on the floor. He was so overwhelmed he couldn’t say to the monks what actually happened. After few hours of calming him down and bringing him back to life, he silently opened his mouth and whispered: “The ancient text says ‘celebrate’, and not ‘celibate!’…”

Please check your references. Ask yourself: Where do I have these beliefs from? Why do I listen to these people? Why do I think that my past mistakes are at the same time limitations to my potential for the future? Does my constant fearing and worrying really have a sound reason? Are the people that I’m following and listening to going in the direction I want to go in my life?

 

3. Just do it!

The title says it all. If you are having doubts and worries about making that change, this might be the best advice you can possibly have. It’s actually a powerful technique which Anthony Robbins shares on his 101 coaching sessions with clients.

Here’s what to do.

Stop thinking about it and just do it!

That’s it! If you want to change something and you are having second thoughts, just STOP thinking about it and then do it!

Let me give you an example.

I want you to stretch your right arm in front of you, right now, as you’re reading this article. Come on, just do it. Stretch it in front of you somewhere at shoulders level. Now hold it there for 10 seconds and simply let it go. Have you done it? Good!

Now let’s try something different… I want you to TRY to raise your arm and stretch it in front of you. Don’t actually DO it, just try it. Think about it and try to do it. You see, “trying” is only an excuse! You can’t “try” something… You will either stretch the arm in front of you, or you won’t! You will either “just do it”, or you won’t…it’s as simple as that!

The more thought you give to it, the slimmer the chances of doing something. It’s the same with the thoughts of regretting about your past. They stop you from doing many things in your life.

Step out of your comfort zone and do the things you’ve always wanted to do! We all get one bite of the apple. If you are tired of going in the same restaurant or café again and again, just change it. If you’ve always wanted to be a vegetarian and you let doubts stop you, just do it! Don’t try to lose weight and regret about your past by blaming your parents for it, just do it! Become slim!

Don’t be afraid to create that business just because you’re regretting your past mistakes and think that you’re too old for a big change like that. Just do it for God’s sake!

Remember, Les Brown was right! The Graveyard, really is the richest place in the world, so be careful not to contribute to its wealth!

Do it now

4. A handful of activities you can do to seize your days

When was the last time you sang? Are you laughing and smiling often? Is your mood positive? Are you a cheerful person? The next time you take a shower – start singing! Sing from your heart! Do it in your car, when you go and when you come back from work.

Singing is one of the best ways to release your stale, negative energy balloons that are just waiting for a needle to pop them. It can be a healing and rejuvenating experience, so do this more often.

Smile. Laugh. It is scientifically proven that just by doing this you prolong your life and improve many aspects of your health. It will help you in letting go of the things that have been bothering you for a long time. Develop a winner and can-do attitude. Believe that you can do it!

Also, do something that scares you each and every day. Seriously! It’s the best way to get out of your comfort zone and to make permanent changes in your personality traits. Engage in meditation. Gain control over your mind and stop regretting your past actions. There really isn’t a single benefit from doing it, so why continue with the madness?

Stop giving yourself a hard time – live your life to the fullest – it’s the only one you’ve got! And don’t forget, you need to celebrate – not celibate!
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15 Comments

15 Comments

  1. Sija Mafu

    Feb 9, 2017 at 8:33 am

    That’s some really great insight, wow!! Thank you for sharing

  2. rashmi

    Jun 27, 2015 at 6:19 pm

    Wow..That waking up with regrets part really got into me..yeah they do add a big burden in the heart even though they may be small things like not finishing the work and I remember feeling like a complete loser..and that celebrate and celibacy discovery by the monk..truly first of its kind I read in these few years..Doing something that scares me daily-I am gonna start it and I have also added a little thing to it thanks to your great article-doing something worthy of celebration-no matter how small..great job!!

    • Zdravko Lukovski

      Jun 29, 2015 at 10:01 am

      Thanks Rashmi, I’m really glad that the article resonated with you!

  3. Fredrick Mutooni

    Jun 6, 2015 at 8:14 pm

    This passage is all about me. Why I never read it 20 yrs ago? Better late than nevet. I love the hand stretching. Just do it.

    • Zdravko Lukovski

      Jun 8, 2015 at 12:10 pm

      I’m glad the article resonated with you Fredrick 🙂 I guess you didn’t read it 20 years ago because I hadn’t wrote it prior to that, but like you said, better late than never!

  4. Simo

    Jun 4, 2015 at 8:29 am

    ” The more thought you give to it, the slimmer the chance of doing it” thank for that reminder from now on, I will Just do it. I even loughed when you say ” raise your right arm, come on just do it” and I did raise my arm.

    • Zdravko Lukovski

      Jun 4, 2015 at 2:04 pm

      But it’s really like that isn’t it Simo? That’s the purpose of the exercise, to come to the awareness that we cannot “TRY” something…It’s an invented word for procrastination and finding excuses. I’m really glad that you actually DID participate in the exercise – it’s much more powerful when you realize this truth by yourself!

  5. Laurie

    Jun 2, 2015 at 2:00 pm

    Hi Zdravko, Yes it all comes down to two words — doing it. Even if we don’t get the results we want, we learn and must try again. Thanks for the reminder.

    • Zdravko Lukovski

      Jun 4, 2015 at 2:06 pm

      You’re welcome Laurie. It really comes down to those words and that’s exactly why I love Nike’s slogan so much: “Just Do It!”

  6. Sameer

    May 30, 2015 at 7:04 pm

    Zdravko , I must say indeed a very great and impact-full words of wisdom. Though everything is great, what resonated with me the most is the point number 1. It is put in such a great vigor that i could imagine you working hard on me to help me out. Though it really absolutely correct, i many a times find that people only connect when there is something that they can think of good coming there way. Many a times it is not clear what is going to come ahead and they are just in the holding on the past then, i think no matter what they simply will not understand the point.
    This is again only from my past experience, may be others are much wiser and it may help even reading or listening on the very first instance.
    Whatever it is thanks a ton, for the words of wisdom.
    Love you loads!!!!

    • Zdravko Lukovski

      May 31, 2015 at 3:25 pm

      Thank you Sameer for the nice words! I’m really glad that the article resonated with you and I truly hope that it added some value into your life. Unfortunately, to many people, the past is like a stalking demon who seems to be showing when they least expect it. The only way to let go of it completely is to consciously acknowledge that it is no longer a reality (it happens just in our imagination) and to mindfully accept it the way it is. It is OK to travel back in time and analyze our past in order to discover some useful life lessons which we would otherwise miss and neglect – but that’s the only useful thing we can do with it as far as it can go. We mustn’t hold onto it emotionally because it can destroy our future entirely. Although it may be hard to do this (especially to people with traumatic past) – that’s the only way to set ourselves free and open up for an exciting life which we all deserve.

      I agree with you that people make a stronger connection when they expect good things to come their way – we should always strive to be an eternal optimist. You’re absolutely right that we cannot predict our future entirely and that many people are unsure of what’s going to happen with them and their lives, but I don’t think that’s the reason why they hold so dearly onto their past. Setting goals and having a worthy ideal is extremely important – but we have to let go of our past completely in order to get there (assuming we posses inner fears and worries with roots back in time).

      Again, thank you taking the time and reading the article in the first place. I’d feel great if somehow I was able to help you with my advice.

      Take care,
      Zdravko Lukovski

  7. Lawrence Berry

    May 30, 2015 at 4:23 pm

    This is a great post. I really think that a lot people let their past shape who they are, but like you said your past, is you just that, your past. Do’t dwell on something that you can’t control. Control your thoughts and actions. I have known people who have the worst past, become great men. They will leave a legacy that represents them and their past will no longer matter.

    • Zdravko Lukovski

      May 31, 2015 at 3:36 pm

      Lawrence thank you for sharing your insights with the community! I also know some magnificent human beings, who regardless of their extremely hard and painful past, were able to become great men and women and help thousands of other individuals along the way.

      All we have – is the presence! And the presence is right now, this very second, me typing these words (you reading them). We choose what to do with our present and that in turn will shape-shift our future. If we choose to live mindfully and be aware of our thoughts, emotions and actions, not only will we become much wiser and live a meaningful, happy and fulfilled life – we’ll also develop a sense of compassion and contentedness with the rest of the world, and that’s exactly where the magic begins to happen!

      I say – let’s our past be a lecture full with valuable lessons, and let’s never make those mistakes again (if we ever made them in the first place). We all deserve to live an abundant, happy, healthy and peaceful life! The past is just history and let the historians do their job – it’s not our responsibility to hold onto it so dearly…

      Thank you for your comment!
      Zdravko

  8. Tonya

    May 29, 2015 at 10:05 pm

    Great article! Thank you for posting. I really needed this swift kick today.

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Life

8 Things You Can Do to Rise Above Failure and Attain Success

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Highly successful people have tasted failure more than success. Whether its Nikola Tesla or Michael Jordan, everyone had his/her fair share of failures before rising to the pinnacle of success. Yet, most people I know are averse to the idea of failure.

When ambition fuels your desires, you become so conscious about avoiding failure that you forget to learn how to cope with it when you actually experience it. So, when you come face-to-face with adversity, it often overwhelms you.

This brings us to the question, how can you train yourself to overcome these difficulties and use them to your advantage? Here’s how:

1. Acceptance is important to overcome failure

When the going gets tough, one of the most frustrating things you may get to hear is “stay positive.” The idea of positive thinking has been misconstrued, misused, and abused continuously. Contrary to popular belief, positive thinking has nothing to do with smiling and being happy with everything that happens to you all the time. Anyone who preaches that is either lying or crazy.

Use positive thinking to learn, grow, and evolve from the experiences we gather in life. Positive thinking simply means that if you are faced with a setback, you work hard to overcome the challenges. When you experience hardships, it is alright to feel upset and disappointed. Our objective, however, is not to stay down.

2. Be honest with yourself

The most crucial part of dealing with a failure involves pausing for a couple of minutes and pondering over what happened. You need to be completely honest with yourself on why it happened.

It is easy to pull out the Smartphone, turn on the laptop or find other forms of distraction. Most people would do anything to distract themselves and keep their eyes shut to the mistakes they have made.

However, if you don’t confront, you don’t learn. And if you don’t learn, then you are setting yourself up for failure again. Albert Einstein famously stated that it was insane to do the same thing over and over again and expect a different outcome. If you don’t derive a lesson out of mistakes and failures in life, then you are doomed to keep repeating them, whether you realise it or not.

“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.” – Henry Ford

3. Don’t beat yourself up over a temporary setback

When you have experienced a setback, many of you may succumb to the feeling that you’ll always keep failing. It is easy to convince yourself that you are indeed a failure. Don’t let such destructive ideas or thoughts creep into your head. Instead, keep reminding yourself that just because you failed today, it doesn’t mean you’d fail the next time as well.

It is also important that you treat your failure as a passing phase. When you keep moving forward, focus on the right things, and keep learning. Perceiving the setback as a temporary phase rather than something permanent is vital to developing an optimistic attitude in life.

4. Focus on nurturing and improving yourself

Failures don’t discriminate, and it comes to everyone at some point. The trick lies in learning to deal with it and what you do about it that makes all the difference. In many cases, failure happens because a person wasn’t prepared, didn’t invest time on planning or was ill-equipped. It can also be because Lady Luck decided not to shower her favours.

Except for the last one, the rest of the issues can be fixed. Prepare a list of all the things that you think resulted in your failure. Start working on them one at a time. Do everything in your capacity to rectify, improve, resolve, and develop.

5. Find inspiration and support in abundance

Interacting with someone close can be more helpful than you think. You can also learn from people who have been through similar situations and have achieved what you hope to. Gain insights on how they managed to sail through the setbacks or low-points before and during the moment of success.

Or you can gain the motivation or enthusiasm by listening to someone else from an audiobook or podcast for maybe 30-60 minutes. It doesn’t have to be focused on your current setbacks.  Change your mood and mindset back towards optimism again.

6. Adopt a constructive approach and learn from the adverse situation

Consider it as valuable feedback and take home something you can implement in the process of overcoming your failure. The following are some of the questions you need to ask yourself:

  • What is the lesson for me?
  • How can I rectify myself to avoid making the same mistake and do better next time?
  • What can I do to enjoy guaranteed success?

You don’t need to rush through the process. Some of the answers may be immediate, while others might take an hour, a day or even a week to pop up. The significant thing is to start thinking about the situation from this perspective. Also, you need to be constructive about things rather than getting stuck with denial, negativity and apathy.

7. Stop mulling over and move on

Processing the situation and accepting it is the ideal way to deal with failures. Any individual who has experienced failures will know that it is quite easy to stay stuck in the loop of similar thoughts. In fact, this may go around and around for weeks or even months.

Now, in order to be free from this trap, the one habit that might help you is the set of questions like the ones shared above. You can also create a rough plan for how you wish to move forward from here. So, take some time to sit down and write them down.

“Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

8. Purge out all the negativity

Another impactful way to handle the emotional meltdown and the thoughts that emerge from experiencing failure is to purge out all the negativity. In order to let everything out, you need to confide in someone close to you. There are two ways to go about it: Engaging in a conversation with someone will allow you to see it from a different perspective. The person you talk to can assist you in grounding yourself in reality again and motivate you to look for a way forward.

Or you can simply vent about it while the other person who is listening can sort things out for you. He/she can help you accept what happened and boost your spirit by instilling a sense of hope.

The significant thing to remember is that while you can’t stop obstacles from appearing in life, you can devise smart ways to handle them. If you persevere, you can easily discover opportunities that have been waiting for you on the other side. Now, as you become more efficient at dealing with the failures, you will allow yourself to see the positive side in even the toughest of scenarios.

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How Stress Can Actually Improve the Quality of Your Life

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Naturally, those of us who experience less stress in our lives are more likely to succeed. So, it’s important that you learn how to reduce your daily level of stress, right? Maybe not. Recent research has shown the common wisdom about stress might be dangerously inaccurate. Psychologists tracked the health of 30,000 adults in the United States over an 8-year period. Participants were asked two important questions:

1.    “How much stress have you experienced in the last year?”
2.    “Do you believe stress is harmful to your health?” (more…)

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Life

The Truth About the Law of Attraction

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When we want something, we generally imagine the form it will take when it manifests. If we’re not careful, however, we can find ourselves attached more to the imagined form than the actual desired outcome. This is like placing an online order and expecting it to come in a blue box shipped by UPS. If we then receive a red box delivered by FedEx, we might not realize that it’s what we ordered, and never even open it!

For example, most of us say that we want money, but when money comes in the form of a free coffee or a gift or a discount, we don’t see it for what it is. We overlook it, and maybe we even say “No, thanks” and decline the gift which is, in one way or another, still money. In doing so, we fail to appreciate the value of the discount, the gift, or the freebie. If it isn’t cash being handed to us, we don’t see it as a manifestation of our desire.

The law of attraction is a funny thing.

It is much more complex and much more intricate than what it seems to be and yet, at the same time, it’s so very simple: We always get what we want. We always receive more of the energy at which we vibrate. Always.

However, if we’re acting from the energy of “I don’t deserve it” or “I don’t think I’m worthy,” then whatever it is that we receive will be negated and essentially unseen. On the other hand, if we are open, observant, and maintaining an abundance mindset, we will receive our request on numerous levels and from plentiful sources!

“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” – Napoleon Hill

This is because we “place our order” not only through our words, but through our actions, our beliefs, and our thoughts.

Last month, I was open to receiving a new client. I didn’t know how it would happen, but I’d set my intention: I was going to get a new client. That night, out of nowhere, I got a message from an old student of mine. She was looking to hire me again as her coach for the upcoming college entrance exams in the U.S. But wait! I didn’t want an entrance exam client.

What I actually wanted was to get life and business coaching clients. This student was my “red box from Fed Ex.” I wanted to decline at first, but as I was about to reply, something made me stop. I asked myself, “Why am I rejecting this?”

This student is an amazing client. She pays on time. She’s not needy. She does her part. Best of all? She doesn’t short-change me. So I said yes, because I realized that the Universe was simply responding to the essence of my desire.

You see, my “Big Why” in everything I do has always been to facilitate an accelerated personal and business growth for my clients, and this student fit the bill in every way. She wanted the personal growth, she was ready to go all in and she reached out to me.

It didn’t look like the package I was expecting so I didn’t recognize it at first—and I nearly turned it away—but she was the perfect answer to my request.

Serving people like her has always been a driving force in my life.

The Universe knows that. It also knew that I wanted a client asap so that I could re-invest the money into my business, so it responded in the most ideal way… but in an unexpected form. And I came so close to missing it!

How many times have I missed other opportunities like this? How many times have I dismissed a “red box” because it wasn’t “blue?” I’ll never know. But I do know that, had I not stopped myself from sending a “No, thanks,” I would have felt as though the Universe wasn’t listening.

That’s the thing: the Universe is always listening.

The more open we are in receiving, the more we thrive. The more open our energy is, the greater the possibilities. Don’t just return that red box to the post office and keep waiting on a blue one. Ask yourself, first and foremost, if what you’re receiving at the moment matches up with your underlying desire.

See yourself living in abundance and you will attract it.” – Rhonda Byrne

The key is to be willing to receive anything and everything. How? Keep on reading1

1. Get clear on your “underlying desire.”

Identify exactly what it is that you really want—in my case, it was an ideal client (underlying) as opposed to a coaching client (surface)—and focus on that. Clear out all the mental noise and static that clouds your awareness.

2. Be flexible

Keep your eyes and mind open for anything that fits the description. When you ask for money, recognize that free coffee for what it is: $3 you were going to spend anyway, that can now remain in your pocket. Every penny on the ground, every coupon, it’s all money.

3. Keep an attitude of gratitude.

The more you appreciate what you have, the more that comes your way. Your grateful mindset opens the energetic door for more to flow your way, because “where attention goes, energy flows.” The more you focus on the things you want, the more you will draw them into your experience.

Remember, that the Universe responds to our requests in whatever way fits best within the big picture.

It’s a picture so big that we couldn’t possibly begin to see how it comes together. Trust it. Know that when you ask, you will receive. It may not come in the form you anticipate, but always in a form that responds to your underlying desire. You just have to be ready to see it.

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Life

7 Simple Ways to Master Your Emotions When Making Decisions

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A lot of people have big regrets when lying on their deathbed. These regrets are often related to bad decisions or decisions not taken. Thus, as it turns out, decision-making is dependent on great self-confidence. A person who has confidence in their decisions has an easier time making them.

Emotions also play a big role in all of this. This is a debate that has confronted two great thinkers. According to Descartes, “decisions are the product of the rational mind.” In other words, decision-making is essentially based on facts and mathematics.

But this thesis was refuted and proven to be wrong by Antonio Damasio in one of his works called “The Error of Descartes”. This was partly based on the story of Elliott, a kid that was very smart, who had above average rational capabilities, but incapable of making a decision, after a surgery to remove a brain tumor on the surface of his frontal lobes. After all his work in that matter, he concludes that a person who is incapable of emotion is incapable of making the most rational decisions.

The management of emotions is therefore completely inherent to good decision making, especially when making the most important decisions. To this end, here are 7 tips to put into practice to really master your emotions thus making the best decisions possible and never regreting them.

1. Take a step back

You must learn to take the time to identify and understand your emotions. Since physical reactions are emotionally related, also take the time to detect the reactions you have to some of your emotions. To be able to take the distance necessary to make decisions, it’s important to refer to your prefrontal cortex. This is the area of ​​the brain responsible for reasoning. To do so you need to put yourself in a stress-free environment for a few minutes.

“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent and committed decision.” – Tony Robbins

2. Breathe

The best way to do this is to learn to breathe deeply. This will allow activating your prefrontal cortex again, therefore, to have better control of your emotions so you do not react to them, let alone to the event that causes these emotions. Do this exercise for at least 15 minutes. It’s amazing how you can train yourself never to react, no matter what the situation. Ideally, let at least 24 hours go by before responding to a situation that would normally cause tension.

3. Pay attention

Once you are in the prefrontal cortex, put one hand on your abdomen, at the level of your intestines, and the other hand on your heart, and take the time to listen. These two parts of the body are the two major centers of vibrations and emotions. This is why it’s important to listen and pay attention to them.

The purpose of this exercise is to become aware of your gut and heart. What you need to remember is that the only person you need to trust is yourself. By practicing this exercise, one thing will become very clear: what the emotion you feel seeks to convey to you about the decision you have to make.

Since everything is energy, first make sure that the vibration of the decision you are about to make and that of your heart and gut are in sync. You will then know whether to go ahead with your decision or reject it based on whether you feel serenity or heaviness.

4. Discern untruths

It is important to know whether your nervousness is the result of an untruth you’ve told yourself. These can corrupt the vibrations that should help you make the right decision. You have to throw out all of these untruths and come to the decision-making without any filter. Stop thinking that you’re unlucky, that you’re in a bad situation, that your life is a failure, or that you are a victim.

5. Become aware of your emotions instead of avoiding them

To become aware of your emotions, you must learn to coach yourself. Ask yourself questions: How did you feel the last time you had to ask these types of questions? What did you get in return? Rename what you felt and the result you obtained from what you decided to do. You will thus be much better at assimilating, understanding, and welcoming your emotions.

6. Be as present as possible

There is no point in focusing on the big events surrounding the decision you want to make. Concentrate instead on the present moment, without analyzing the events. Judge based on emotions rather than the event. By being more present, you will be better able to listen to your emotions and feel them.

Life is a matter of choices, and every choice you make makes you.” – John C. Maxwell

7. Make your emotions your allies

Each of your emotions speaks to you through the physical and physiological reactions that they generate in you. Look to the weight of their impact on you as an indicator. Only by listening to them, using them, and managing them can you manage your emotions.

Habit comes with practice. With time, these 7 points will become much more natural and will become automatic. You will make better decisions for yourself.  This is one of the best ways to not end up with one of the big regrets.

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