Life
4 Science-Backed Tips That Will Improve Your Social Life
No one can deny being socially skilled is one of the most crucial traits one can ever have. As Dale Carnegie once noticed, more than 80% of your success is due to your character and people skills. Your ability to lead people and convince them with your ideas will always remain important.
Here are four science-backed tips which will improve your social life regardless of your social background:
1. Make People Open Up with The CCA Technique
Do you want to always have something to say and never worry about awkward silence? Author and Speech Pathologist, Carol A. Fleming has an interesting technique she uses to break the ice. She calls it, “Comment, Comment, then Ask.” Fleming realized that if you want to ask someone a personal question, it is less creepy and more comfortable to throw in a couple of comments in order to justify your request for information.
For instance, if you are in a convention and want to ask a stranger what brought them here, you can get a good response if you phrase it like this, “They certainly have a lot of booths set up. There were not nearly as many people last year. Have you been to this convention many times before? If you’ve noticed, this request consists of three pieces:
- The first comment: They certainly have a lot of booths set up.
- The second Comment: There were not nearly as many people last year.
- The final question: Have you been to this convention many times before?
I`ve been using this technique for years, and it’s amazing, especially when I’m with strangers and don’t know what to say. To be good at this, use it on everything you see, from the stuff in your room to what you watch on T.V. Practice for two weeks straight, and I guarantee you’ll amaze yourself.
“To be interesting, be interested.” – Dale Carnegie
2. The Snowball Technique: Do What Athletes Do
The Snowball Technique is very simple. Anytime you have an important meeting make sure you first warm up your social skills by talking, smiling or even saying hi to 10 or 20 people.
Conversations are more like sports, you can’t play well until you warm up. People who have excellent social skills goof around with others the moment they leave home. They greet neighbors, wink at toddlers and have small talk with anyone they can talk to, so they`re already at their peak when it’s time for important meetings, dates or hangouts.
The next time you feel anxious, don’t blame or judge yourself, just remember to warm up and slowly build your confidence by talking to 10 or 15 easy targets. Eventually, your snowball will grow, words will come naturally, you will smile more, and begin to feel more confident.
3. Point Out Similarities
According to studies, people will like you more if you let them know how similar you are to them. Social psychologists Elaine Walster and Ellen Berscheid, believe people make friendships based on their shared interests. In other words, we like to be around those who agree with us because their similarities make us feel less alone and their predictability makes us feel more in control.
Behavioral investigator and bestselling author, Vanessa Van Edwards, shares the same beliefs. She believes that people magnets use every opportunity to highlight the common grounds they share with others. A magnet will say things like, “Wow, you like Orange Is the New Black? I’m an addict,” or ”You’re gluten-free? Join the club.”
Whereas a people repeller will shut others down with stuff like “You know, I never really got into Orange Is the New Black. I thought it was kinda boring.” Or “You’re one of those gluten-free people? Don’t you think that’s a fad?”
“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway
4. Observe and Imitate
The easiest and fastest way to learn social skills is to hang around those whose social skills are better than yours. As studies have found, you will soon pick up some of those skills and your performance will improve without consuming your reservoir of willpower and mental energy.
Entrepreneur and bestselling author, Scott Adams used this technique to build his social skills. He noticed that outgoing kids usually come from outgoing families not because they have specific genes but because they mimic their older peers. If you do the same thing and find yourself some role models, then you will become like them without even knowing.
What are some things you do to help improve your social life? Comment below!
Life
9 Harsh Truths Every Young Man Must Face to Succeed in the Modern World
Before chasing success, every young man needs to face these 9 brutal realities shaping masculinity in the modern world.
Many young men today quietly battle depression, loneliness, and a sense of confusion about who they’re meant to be.
Some blame the lack of deep friendships or romantic relationships. Others feel lost in a digital world that often labels traditional masculinity as “toxic.”
But the truth is this: becoming a man in the modern age takes more than just surviving. It takes resilience, direction, and a willingness to grow even when no one’s watching.
Success doesn’t arrive by accident or luck. It’s built on discipline, sacrifice, and consistency.
Here are 9 harsh truths every young man should know if he wants to thrive, not just survive, in the digital age.
1. Never Use Your Illness as an Excuse
As Dr. Jordan B. Peterson often says, successful people don’t complain; they act.
Your illness, hardship, or struggle shouldn’t define your limits; it should define your motivation. Rest when you must, but always get back up and keep building your dreams. Motivation doesn’t appear magically. It comes after you take action.
Here are five key lessons I’ve learned from Dr. Peterson:
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Learn to write clearly; clarity of thought makes you dangerous.
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Read quality literature in your free time.
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Nurture a strong relationship with your family.
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Share your ideas publicly; your voice matters.
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Become a “monster”, powerful, but disciplined enough to control it.
The best leaders and thinkers are grounded. They welcome criticism, adapt quickly, and keep moving forward no matter what.
2. You Can’t Please Everyone And That’s Okay
You don’t need a crowd of people to feel fulfilled. You need a few friends who genuinely accept you for who you are.
If your circle doesn’t bring out your best, it’s okay to walk away. Solitude can be a powerful teacher. It gives you space to understand what you truly want from life. Remember, successful men aren’t people-pleasers; they’re purpose-driven.
3. You Can Control the Process, Not the Outcome
Especially in creative work, writing, business, or content creation, you control effort, not results.
You might publish two articles a day, but you can’t dictate which one will go viral. Focus on mastery, not metrics. Many great writers toiled for years in obscurity before anyone noticed them. Rejection, criticism, and indifference are all part of the path.
The best creators focus on storytelling, not applause.
4. Rejection Is Never Personal
Rejection doesn’t mean you’re unworthy. It simply means your offer, idea, or timing didn’t align.
Every successful person has faced rejection repeatedly. What separates them is persistence and perspective. They see rejection as feedback, not failure. The faster you learn that truth, the faster you’ll grow.
5. Women Value Comfort and Security
Understanding women requires maturity and empathy.
Through books, lectures, and personal growth, I’ve learned that most women desire a man who is grounded, intelligent, confident, emotionally stable, and consistent. Some want humor, others intellect, but nearly all want to feel safe and supported.
Instead of chasing attention, work on self-improvement. Build competence and confidence, and the rest will follow naturally.
6. There’s No Such Thing as Failure, Only Lessons
A powerful lesson from Neuro-Linguistic Programming: failure only exists when you stop trying.
Every mistake brings data. Every setback builds wisdom. The most successful men aren’t fearless. They’ve simply learned to act despite fear.
Be proud of your scars. They’re proof you were brave enough to try.
7. Public Speaking Is an Art Form
Public speaking is one of the most valuable and underrated skills a man can master.
It’s not about perfection; it’s about connection. The best speakers tell stories, inspire confidence, and make people feel seen. They research deeply, speak honestly, and practice relentlessly.
If you can speak well, you can lead, sell, teach, and inspire. Start small, practice at work, in class, or even in front of a mirror, and watch your confidence skyrocket.
8. Teaching Is Leadership in Disguise
Great teachers are not just knowledgeable. They’re brave, compassionate, and disciplined.
Teaching forces you to articulate what you know, and in doing so, you master it at a deeper level. Whether you’re mentoring a peer, leading a team, or sharing insights online, teaching refines your purpose.
Lifelong learners become lifelong leaders.
9. Study Human Nature to Achieve Your Dreams
One of the toughest lessons to accept: most people are self-interested.
That’s not cynicism, it’s human nature. Understanding this helps you navigate relationships, business, and communication more effectively.
Everyone has a darker side, but successful people learn to channel theirs productively into discipline, creativity, and drive.
Psychology isn’t just theory; it’s a toolkit. Learn how people think, act, and decide, and you’ll know how to lead them, influence them, and even understand yourself better.
Final Thoughts
The digital age offers endless opportunities, but only to those who are willing to take responsibility, confront discomfort, and keep improving.
Becoming a man today means embracing the hard truths most avoid.
Because at the end of the day, success isn’t about luck. It’s about who you become when life tests you the most.
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