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15 Life Lessons I’ve Learned On My Way to Turning 30

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15 Life Lessons I've Learned On My Way to Turning 30

Turning 30 seems to be a milestone for a lot of us. After all, it’s the big “three-O.” I’ve learnt a lot on my way to 30. Some of the lessons are well, not so fun. But I’m happy to have experienced everything that I have, for they have made me who I am today.

As I’ve come to believe, life is about consistent evolution so you can become the best version of yourself.

Here are 15 things I learned about life on my way to turning 30:

 

1. The unpredictability of life makes things very real

When I was 20, my dad died. He had ALS. It made me realize how real life is.

Most of us live life and experience the world through reading the news. We read about death, loss and tragedy only, but rarely ever experience it so close to you. In a way, we’re shielded from what’s going on around us.

My dad’s death made me realize how big, real and scary life can be. That’s not to say I lead a paranoid life now though. It simply means that I live my life according to my terms to the fullest, but my mind never forgets about the big picture.

So live your life to the fullest. Don’t be scared, but don’t take it for granted either.

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” – E.E. Cummings

2. You learn a lot about yourself in relationships

As you’re emotionally attached to someone else, you’ll discover many things about yourself. However, not all of them are things you are proud of.

For example, I remember in one of my early relationships, I had a very bad temper. I’d lose control and start shouting when my girlfriend made me upset.

It’s always good to learn about yourself, but don’t be too surprised when you act out of character. Be brutally honest with yourself and learn to be better.

 

3. Breakups can really hurt, but you’ll be fine

Yep. When a relationship ends, a void forms. You’ll start to feel emotionally empty as he or she is not there anymore.

It can hurt a lot, but with some time, you’ll be fine. So remember that it’s not the end of the world. The next one will come along.

 

4. When somebody acts really nice to you, it could be that they want something out of you

This is a harsh reality, but it’s true. When somebody appears to be really nice and helpful to you, there could be a string attached.

I remember connecting with someone online and he was helping me access my blog. He actually said, “I don’t normally do this for others, but for you I will.” Then he tried to sell me his coaching package.

Indeed, through the manipulation of words, it’s very easy to think that such people are looking out for you, but in reality, they aren’t. So don’t be fooled by them. Always be wary of the words they use, for talk is cheap.

 

5. Some friendships don’t last forever

I’ve personally fallen out with a handful of friends in my twenties alone. I was even close to a few of them for many years.

But, things happen. People change. You change. Circumstances change and sometimes, the best solution is to simply drift apart or break away. Thus, don’t be too surprised when you aren’t talking to some friends anymore. Just move on.

“The trick is to enjoy life. Don’t wish away your days , waiting for better ones ahead.” – Marjorie Hinckley

6Partying gets old really quick

It does, because partying is the easiest way to have fun. All you need is money and drinks. Getting drunk and hungover are really not fun at all though. Find better things to do already. Do things that challenge you!

 

7. School is just a phase in life

After I graduated from college, I was amazed yet overwhelmed by how life was like. My first job showed me that the working world is indeed a whole new world. And more often than not, you have to relearn everything as what you’ve learn in school can’t be applied outside at all.

Indeed, school is just a phase. I’m not here to argue about whether a college degree is valuable or not, but I do believe education is important. So get it done and over with. You have your whole life ahead of you after that.

 

8. “True love” is nothing more than a feeling of heightened emotions

Perhaps I’ll be coming across as cynical here, but hear me out. I believe that “love” is the maximum amount of heightened emotions you can feel for someone at that point of time only. That means to say, these emotions will be different and ever increasing when you move on to the next person.

Think about it: Do you think the “love” you feel for your high school crush when you were 16 is the same as the “love” you feel for someone when you’re much older? Hence, love can change. Love always evolves for you. This is why people say go with the flow.

 

9. No matter how good looking you are, you become ugly when you’re unhappy

I experienced this lesson firsthand when I dated a cover girl model. She was physically beautiful, but she had an extremely bad attitude. She couldn’t control her emotions well either.

It made me learn that no matter how good looking you are, you become ugly the minute you are angry, sad, or constantly frustrated. If you want real beauty, look inside. Real beauty exists when the person is happy.

 

10. Travelling expands your mind and your world

If you want to grow up overnight, travel to somewhere uncomfortable. Do it alone if you can even.

I remember when I went to the rural outskirts of Thailand, I was blown away by the lifestyle people led there. It made me learn how the important things that make me happy or unhappy in my life are entirely irrelevant to people from other parts of the world!

So travel, it will expand your mind. You’ll realize how small some of your problems really are.

 

11. As you get older, you realize you don’t need that many friends

All you need is your core group of closest friends. My group consists of only four to five friends. After all, I’m a grown up now. I am not aiming to be prom queen or class president. Besides, you can’t please everybody in life anyway. Stick to whoever makes you happy and that’s good enough.

 

12. There’re many unhappy relationships out there

Marriages even. And this reflects strongly, and badly in their behaviors. I’ve seen many couples cheat and indulge in infidelity, even the married ones.

It honestly comes as a shock as we all grow up believing that love is black and white (from our parents.) But as we grow older, we realize that there are many grey areas.

I say, stick to your own standards when it comes to love. Work on your own relationship and be moral about it. Just try to be happy then.

 

13. You’re bound to judge people so you might as well do it right

I know the norm is that we should not judge a book by its cover, but I believe as humans, we are pretty judgmental by nature anyway. So, do it right.

For example, if I meet someone for the first time and I see that they’re extremely rude to the cashier or waiter, that is not someone I want to be around with. It’s just not worth it. There are better and nicer people out there waiting for you anyway.

“The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.” – Max Lerner

14. If you don’t want to feel old, then hang out with like-minded people

Every time a birthday looms, I always hear from people about how they start to feel old. I am guilty of that too.

But every time I grow a year older, I feel the same. It’s solely because of the people I hang out with. I hang out with people around my age or older who’re still doing what they love or having fun.

For certain, who you hang out with largely impacts the person you’d become. So this isn’t exactly about age or feeling old. It’s about surrounding yourself with positive people.

 

15. Life can truly begin anytime inside of your head

When I hit 30, I couldn’t shrug off the feeling that I was already 30 and that I should be calling the shots. I literally kept thinking, “I am 30! I don’t need to listen anybody anymore. I can do what I want.

So I got myself a tattoo. Turning 30 was the catalyst, but really, you can choose to do whatever it is you want any day. It all begins in your head and then you have to search deep and find the drive to do it. Don’t wait too long though. We still aren’t getting younger.

 

What life lessons have you learned with age? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below!

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When you look back on your life, what do you want to think about? Do you plan to reminisce on all of the good things that have happened and how they shaped who you are today? Or would you rather remember all of the bad decisions, challenging experiences, and mistakes made that hurt or wasted a portion of your life?

In my opinion, I think it is important to reflect on both. While it’s important to remember the hardships we’ve been through in our lives – without them we wouldn’t be where we are now. There are 3 very specific areas that I feel have helped me grow in a personal sense more than anything else in my life so far. 

These aren’t simple lessons in a book or a lecture that you can just absorb and apply to your life. These are things that I’ve learned through experience and reflection, and I’m still learning and growing today.

1. We determine how much we’re worth by what we think about ourselves, others, and life in general.

This might seem like a pretty obvious lesson in life but it’s actually one of the most important because we can determine our own worth by how we think about ourselves and the world around us. If you’re looking for success in any kind of business or social setting (dating), then I’ll tell you right now that it doesn’t matter if you have 10 billion dollars or not – people are still going to judge you based on your thoughts and beliefs alone.

What determines our value isn’t necessarily what we do with our lives (which is often based on luck) but whether or not we believe that ‘our work’ is worthy or not in some sort of grand scheme or universe. We may not always be able to control what happens in our lives, but we can always control how we value ourselves and others.

“Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” – Maya Angelou

2. You don’t have to change your habits or personality just because someone else doesn’t like it – their opinions are THEIRS alone.

This is another one of those lessons that people tend to pick up on a little bit late in life, but if anything that makes its importance even worse! Basically, there’s going to come a time when you’re going to meet someone who has certain expectations of you as a person…but these expectations might not be realistic due to their motivations and personal beliefs. For example, sometimes parents might expect you to be a lawyer or doctor because that’s what they believe is best for their child.

However, this isn’t the case for everyone and so maybe your passion lies in music or writing novels. In this example, if you were also pressured into becoming a doctor – then there would obviously be some kind of conflict going on within yourself as a person. You should never have to give up something that you want to do just because someone else doesn’t like it! The reason why we’re put onto this Earth is to make our own choices and go after our OWN dreams instead of letting others determine what we can and cannot do with our lives .

3. You can’t change your life until you accept that you need to make a change.

When I was younger, I thought that this lesson would be pretty obvious – but as I got older, it really made me appreciate the fact that there are always different ways of perceiving our lives. For example, if someone wants to become rich and famous one day – their mind might simply overshadow any other possibility in their head because they feel like this is what they NEED to do right now.

However, this isn’t always true within our own lives because we think about things too literally instead of having an open mind. If you want to achieve success in any kind of business or social setting (dating) then you should be willing to try out different things instead of staying in your comfort zone. If you want something, then it’s up to YOU to actually go after it – nobody else is going to give it to you!

The three lessons above are some of the main things I want to pass on to everyone because they’ve come at an important time in my life where I need to start thinking about others instead of only myself. It’s great if we can learn to love ourselves first before anything else, but that doesn’t mean you should neglect everyone around you even though they might be your friends and family members!

If you enjoyed this article on the 3 most important things I learned about personal growth, then please share it with your friends and family! Also, check out my other articles on success & motivation as well as life lessons that could help people who are struggling with their life right now on lifengoal.com. Thanks for reading!

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