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30 Things to Start Doing Right Now to Improve Your Life

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30 Things to Start Doing Right Now to Improve Your Life

Have you ever wondered why there are so many unhappy people around? It’s difficult to meet a happy person, and that is why we consider it normal when life is full of problems and sorrow.

It is not normal. The reality should be different. Happiness and peace should accompany our soul all the time. What makes us unhappy is overestimated expectations toward ourselves, our relatives, our income, our career, etc.

People who have overestimated expectations consider their imperfection and environment a reason of their unstable internality. They are sure to jitter because the reality differs from what they want, and they think they should make all dreams come true to recover poise.

But such assurance is not enough. Every day is the starting point of something new. While we make plans, life goes by, and we don’t become happier. Don’t make plans. Motivate yourself to live right now.

Make your every day amazing with these 30 things to do right now:

 

1. Spend time with right people

They love you and have a positive influence on you. They make you feel a passion to life, they accept you for whom you are, and you want to look up to them.

 

2. Meet problems with your head high

It’s not your problems only that can tell about you but the way you solve them and react to them. Problems will not disappear until you start acting.

 

3. Be honest with yourself

Confess what you want to achieve and whom you want to be. Always be honest with yourself because you are the only person you can rely on. Look for the truth in your soul.

 

4Put your own happiness first

Your needs are important. If you do not take care of yourself and if you do not protect yourself, you make everything worse. Remember: it’s always possible to take care of yourself, taking into account the needs of those around you.

 

5Be yourself and be proud of that

Your attempts to become someone else damages the personality inside you. Be yourself, use that person inside – his or her ideas, strengths, charm — and you’ll become a better version of yourself. If you can’t do that, you won’t be able to do that with other people.

 

6Pay attention to the present

Everything wonderful happens right here and now. Right now is the only moment you have for sure, so stop thinking about your great future achievements. Stop living with your past or your future because life is what happens today. Be grateful for the moment your life gives you.

 

7Appreciate the lessons you’ve learned from your mistakes

If you don’t fail sometimes, you don’t try and learn. Great achievements always come at the end of a long road paved with mistakes and attempts. Risk, fail, try again. Build a bridge to your success.

 

8Be polite toward yourself

If you had a friend who spoke to you the way you spoke to yourself sometimes, would you be able to keep his company? Your attitude toward yourself is the example for others on how to behave with you.

 

9Take pleasure from what you already have

The problem of many people is their waiting for happiness to come after achieving something great, a level of life their boss or friends have, for example. As the result, your whole life will be spent on constant work, and you will not have time to stop and admire the moment. Learn to take pleasure from what you already have.

 

10Create your happiness

You waste your time, waiting for someone who’ll make you happy. Smile because you are the one who can do that. Choose your happiness and be the change you want to see in this world.

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon

11Give a chance to your ideas and dreams

Life is not about getting a chance but using it. You’ll never be 100% sure you’ll succeed, but you can be 100% sure you won’t succeed if you do nothing. You will win anyway, whether it is success or a good lesson.

 

12Believe you are ready for the next step

You are ready! Think of it. You have everything needed for taking a small step forward. Use a chance and the  resources you have, and do not hide from problems.

 

13Build relations with new people when needed

Choose honest people who are a reflection of the personality you are or want to be. Build relations with people you are proud to call your friends, people who love and respect you.

 

14Give new people a chance

It’s the ugly truth, but you can’t support relations with everyone who was your friend. People change, and your priorities change, too. Relations come to an end, but new relations appear. Trust your judgments, appreciate a chance to meet new people and become their friends. Be ready to learn, get ready for problems, but also get ready to meet someone who will change your life forever.

 

15Compete with your old self

Get inspiration from people, value them, learn from them but remember: competing with them will be your waste of time. The only person to compete with is yourself.  Set goals to achieve more, and compete for becoming better than you are now.

 

16Be happy for others

Be happy for people who succeed, and be grateful for everything good they do for you. Sooner or later, your attitude toward them will come back to you, and people will be happy for you, too.

 

17Look for good in bad situations

When everything is bad and when you are upset, remember that problems can (and they will) make you stronger. Concentrate on what you have rather than what you don’t have.

 

18Forgive yourself and others

Healing is forgiving. It doesn’t mean you forget about something that hurt you; it means you forget your pain, learn from it, and move on.

 

19Help everyone around you

Take care of people. If you know a better way, show it to them. The more you help others, the more others will want to help you. Love and kindness bear love and kindness. And it will always be so.

 

20Listen to your inner self

If it helps, discuss your ideas with your close friends, but do not forget about your intuition, too. Be honest with yourself. Do what your heart tells you to do.

“Wealth is the ability to fully experience life.” – Henry David Thoreau

21Do not allow yourself to stress. Take some breaks

Slow down and take it easy. Allow yourself to pause and go forward clearly and purposefully. When you are busy, a little break can bring you back to the freshness of mind.

 

22Notice a beauty of every moment

Look for happiness in small events instead of waiting for something great to happen: a cup of coffee in the morning, a smell of homemade food, or hands of a beloved person in your hands.

 

23Accept good even if it’s not ideal

Remember: the ideal is the enemy of good. Sometimes it’s better to accept the world and people rather than trying to idealize them. Learn to love unideal, too.

 

24Work on getting closer to your goals

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Whatever you dream about, do something to move closer to it every day.

 

25Don’t hide your feelings

If you feel bitter, give yourself time to take offense, but do not hide your emotions. Talk to your close friends about that, tell them what you feel. It’s not difficult to do, and it can be the first step toward your good mood.

 

26Be responsible for your life

Let your choices and mistakes be yours, be ready to do something to solve your problems. You are the only person who should manage your life. And yes, it’s not always easy.

 

27Develop the most important relations

You can’t be everything for everyone, but you can be everything for a couple of people. You do not need many friends, you need friends whom you can call real.

 

28Focus on what you can control

There are a lot of things out of our control. Focus on what you can control. If you can’t control something at least control your attitude or reaction to it.

 

29Focus on positive results

You should believe you CAN do it. Listen to your inner self, think positively. And take a step forward.

 

30Think about how rich you are

When hard times come, it’s important to see everything in the long view: you can choose clothes to wear today, you have water, you are free to have weird habits, you have the Internet access, etc. Be grateful for what you have.

 

Which one of these are you going to implement into your life first?

Lesley Vos is a private educator for college students. She writes a lot, mentoring Hugh Beaulac and blogging for many publications on education, career, success, motivation, and self-development. Don't hesitate to say hi and check more works of hers on Twitter.

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5 Indicators of Unresolved Attachment Trauma

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Emotional Attachment Trauma

Trauma caused during specific stages of a child’s development, known as attachment trauma, can have lasting effects on a person’s sense of safety, security, predictability, and trust. This type of trauma is often the result of abuse, neglect, or inconsistent care from a primary caregiver.

Individuals who have not fully processed attachment trauma may display similar patterns of behavior and physical or psychological symptoms that negatively impact their adult lives, including the choices they make in relationships and business.

Unfortunately, many people may not even be aware that they are struggling with trauma. Research estimates that 6% of the population will experience PTSD in their lifetime, with a majority of males and females having experienced significant trauma.

Unresolved attachment trauma can significantly impair the overall quality of a person’s life, including their ability to form healthy relationships and make positive choices for themselves. One well-known effect of unhealed attachment trauma is the compulsion to repeat past wounds by unconsciously selecting romantic partners who trigger their developmental trauma.

However, there are other less recognized but equally detrimental signs of unprocessed developmental trauma.

 

Five possible indications of unresolved attachment trauma are:

 

1.  Unconscious Sabotage

Self-sabotage is a common pattern among individuals with unprocessed attachment trauma. This cycle often begins with hurting others, which is then followed by hurting oneself. It is also common for those with attachment trauma to have heightened emotional sensitivity, which can trigger this cycle.

This pattern can manifest in lashing out, shutting down, or impulsive behavior that leads to feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing.

Many people with attachment trauma are not aware of their wounds and operate on survival mode, unconsciously testing or challenging the emotional investment of those around them, and pushing them away out of self-preservation and fear of abandonment.

This can lead to a pattern of making poor choices for themselves based on impulsivity.

 

2. Persistent Pain

 
Chronic pain is a common symptom that can stem from early trauma. Studies have shown a connection between physical conditions such as fibromyalgia, headaches, gastrointestinal issues, insomnia, muscle aches, back pain, chest pain, and chronic fatigue with the aftermath of chronic developmental trauma, particularly physical abuse.
 
Research has found that individuals with insecure attachment styles, such as anxious, avoidant, or disorganized, have a higher incidence of somatic symptoms and a history of physical and emotional abuse in childhood compared to those with a secure attachment style.
 
 

3. Behaviors That Block Out Trauma

 
Trauma blocking practises are used to avoid the pain and memories connected with traumatic events.
 
Emotional numbing, avoidance, and escape via briefly pleasurable activities that distract from terrible memories or suffering are common examples. Unfortunately, this escape habit stops people from successfully processing and recovering from their trauma.
 
Furthermore, when the pain resurfaces, more and more diversions are necessary to continue ignoring it. This can be seen in compulsive behaviours such as drug or alcohol addiction, emotional eating, numbing oneself through relationships, workaholism, excessive or dangerous exercise routines, compulsive internet or technology use, or any other compulsive behaviour used to distract yoursef from intrusive thoughts and emotions.
 
These actions have the potential to prolong a cycle of avoidance and repression, preventing persons from healing and progressing.
 

4. A strong need for control

 
It’s understandable that some people may struggle with control issues in their adult lives, especially if they felt helpless or vulnerable during their childhood.
 
This can happen if someone had an overbearing caregiver who didn’t let them make their own choices, expected too much from them, or didn’t take care of them properly. As adults, they might try to control everything in their life to feel more in control and less anxious or scared. This might be because they didn’t feel like they had control over their life when they were a child.
 
It’s important to remember that everyone’s experiences are different and it’s okay to seek help if you’re struggling with control issues.
 
 

5. Psychological Symptoms That Are Not Explained

 
Individuals with a history of developmental trauma may experience a range of psychological symptoms, including obsessive-compulsive behavior, intense mood swings, irritability, anger, depression, emotional numbing, or severe anxiety.
 
These symptoms can vary in intensity and may occur intermittently throughout the day. People with this type of trauma may attempt to “distract” themselves from these symptoms by denying or rationalizing them, or may resort to substance abuse or behavioral addictions as coping mechanisms. This can be a maladaptive way of trying to numb their symptoms.
 
 

What to do next if you’re suffering from emotional attachment trauma?

 
Everyone’s experience of healing from trauma is unique. It’s important to be aware of whether you have experienced childhood developmental trauma and how it may be affecting your relationships as an adult. Sometimes, the effects of trauma can be overwhelming and we may try to push them away or avoid them.
 
If you notice that you’re engaging in these behaviors, it’s important to seek help from a trauma therapist who can support you on your healing journey. Remember, you’re not alone and it’s never too late to start healing.
 

There are several ways that people can work to overcome emotional attachment trauma:

  1. Therapy: One of the most effective ways to overcome emotional attachment trauma is through therapy. A therapist can help you process your experiences, understand the impact of your trauma on your life, and develop coping strategies to manage symptoms.
  2. Support groups: Joining a support group of people who have had similar experiences can be a great way to find validation, empathy, and a sense of community.
  3. Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness practices such as meditation, pilates, prayer time with God or journaling can help you become more aware of your thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, and develop a sense of spiritual connection and self-regulation.
  4. Trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (TF-CBT): This is a type of therapy that is specifically designed to help individuals process and recover from traumatic events.
  5. Building a safety net: Building a support system of people you trust, who are there for you when you need them, can help you feel more secure and safe in your life.

It’s important to remember that healing from emotional attachment trauma is a process and it may take time. It’s also important to find a therapist who is experienced in treating trauma, who you feel comfortable talking with, and who can help you develop a personalized treatment plan.

 
 
If you desire to work with me on healing your wounds and unlocking the aspects of you that were never realized so you can achieve more success in your life then head over to awebliss.com and join my weekly LIVE online mentorship calls.
 
 
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