Dating & Relationships
Dating while you are building a business
She asked if Thursday still worked, and I said yes while I was reading a sentence in another window.
I heard the yes leave my mouth. I also heard that I had not looked at Thursday. Thursday had a call I had moved twice, a draft that was late, and the particular optimism of a man who believes a gap will appear if he agrees to the gap. I put the phone down and wrote “Thu” on a scrap, as if the scrap were a calendar. It was not. It was a promise I had already spent.
This is the version of dating nobody puts in the profile. Not the travel, not the ambition, not the line about building something. The part where you are good at the first dinner, because the first dinner has a start time and an end, and then you are unreliable at the third, because the third is competing with a customer who writes at 9 p.m. and expects a reply that sounds awake. You tell yourself you are protecting the relationship by not talking about the work. What you are protecting is the story that you can do both without either of them noticing.
I have been the person on the other side of that, too. Not as a founder. As the one watching someone check the corner of the table every time a plate arrived. You can feel the room change when a phone is face down and still running the evening. The conversation gets polite. Polite is how a date ends without anyone having to say it ended.
The first dinner is a terrible witness. I have sat across from people who were funny, specific, and on time, and then disappeared into a launch for eleven days. I have also been that person, which is worse, because you get to keep the memory of having been good company. The memory is not what they are dating. They are dating the Tuesday you do not narrate. On that Tuesday the phone is in your hand between every task, and “I’ll reply in a minute” is a sentence you say to yourself so often it stops meaning a minute.
We already have the harsher list, the one about what it is actually like to date someone who is building a company. I am not adding another warning label. I am talking about the hour before you text back. The hour where you know a same-day “running late” is becoming your personality, and you send it anyway because the call ran long and the apology is faster than the reschedule.
The reschedule is the part I got wrong for a year. I treated a moved plan as a small tax. It is not small to the person who left work on time, who told a friend they had plans, who is now standing outside a place you are twenty minutes from. After the third one, they stop arranging their week around you. They do not announce it. They just stop offering Thursdays.
I used to explain this as a season. Seasons are real. A product launch, a hire, a month where the money is tight and every call feels like it could tip the thing. The lie is the open-ended season. I have watched men, and I have been one, describe three years as a season. The person across the table cannot plan a birthday around a season with no last day. They can survive a bad month if you say it is a bad month. They cannot survive a personality you keep calling temporary.
What the work takes is not only the evening. It takes the attention you were going to use to remember that her sister was having a test on Friday, or that he does not drink on weeknights, or that the restaurant you picked last time was too loud and they were kind about it. Forgetting those things reads as indifference, even when the cause is a tab you did not close. Indifference is what people leave over. Not ambition. Ambition is easy to admire from a distance. It is harder to sit beside when it keeps standing you up.
There is a smaller dishonesty I got away with for longer than I should have. I would talk about the company on the date as if talking about it were the same as including them. A story from the day, a name they will never meet, a problem I had already decided. They would nod. I would feel close. We had not made a single decision together. Closeness that only runs one way is a presentation. Presentations go well and still do not become a life.
The phone is the prop in all of this, which is why I keep coming back to it. Face down is not a boundary. It is a courtesy that lets you feel the buzz in the table. I started leaving it in the coat. Not as a bit. Because I could not trust the face-down version of myself to stay in the room after the first notification. The coat is a stupid solution. It worked better than the speech I had prepared about being present.
What changed besides the coat was a rule I could keep on a bad week. One night that did not move, picked before the week filled in, and a reply that went out the same day even if the reply was no. No is cleaner than a yes you will edit on the sidewalk. I had spent years being a yes in rooms that did not need me, and then having nothing left for the room that did. The page on stopping that reflex is about work. It applies here with worse consequences, because a colleague will book you again and a person you like might not.
Saying no to a date is not the failure. The failure is the yes that becomes a rain check, then a shorter evening, then a person who stops suggesting things because suggesting things has started to feel like chasing. If you cannot do Thursday, say so on Monday. Offer a night you have already looked at. If the month is genuinely impossible, say the month is impossible. Adults can hear that. What they cannot use is a string of almosts.
The other mistake was treating apps as the problem or the cure. They are a door. If you open the door and then vanish for five days because a launch ate the week, the door is not what failed. I send people who are actually going to show up to Hinge, because the prompt format makes it harder to hide behind a skyline photo and a job title, and a job title is the whole facade when the company is what you have instead of a life. Bumble will put the first move on the other person. The League will narrow the room. A group chat and a friend who will tell you the truth will beat all three if you will not leave the office. Use the one you will answer. An unread match is not a personal life.
There is a way to use those apps that makes the problem worse, and I did that too. I would match on a Sunday night when the work had gone quiet and I felt the lack of a person, and then I would not answer on Monday because Monday was the job. The other person experienced that as interest that expired. I experienced it as a week. Those are not the same event. If you are going to be unreachable from Monday to Thursday, do not spend Sunday collecting people who will spend Monday wondering if the conversation was a mood.
Friends will tell you to “make time,” which is advice from someone whose time is not currently a customer. Making time, in the week I am describing, means a night that is on the calendar before the customer writes. It means a reply that does not wait for you to feel caught up, because caught up is not a state this kind of work arrives at. It means telling the truth about the month instead of renting optimism by the evening.
The woman from that Thursday is not my wife. I do not say that to tidy the story. I say it because the evening I am describing was a real mess, and the life I have now is a different one. I am happily married. It worked out. It did not work out because I got better at answering from inside another window. It worked out with a woman who got the version of me that had already learned the coat, the same-day no, and the night that did not move.
If you are in the season I was in, do not promise Thursday from a tab you have not closed. Look at the day. Say the no while it is still early enough to be kind. Leave one evening that belongs to the person in front of you, and leave the phone in the coat, not face down like a compromise. The company will still be in there in the morning. The right person will not have to stand outside a restaurant to find out if you meant the yes.
Here’s a video of mine on how I navigated dating and relationships while building a successful business:
Dating & Relationships
Healthy Ways to Repair a Relationship
Relationships can have ups and downs. Sometimes, we need to find ways to fix and strengthen our bonds. Whether you’re dealing with minor disagreements or bigger problems, it’s important to approach them with care. Repairing a relationship can be challenging, but with the right mindset and steps, you can build a strong and fulfilling connection. It’s about working together to heal, focusing on your goals, and taking action for a healthier partnership.
Here are some healthy ways to repair your relationship.
Open Communication
Honesty is the foundation of any healthy relationship. When issues come up, it’s easy to stay quiet or let resentment grow. Instead, make open conversation a priority, where both partners can share their feelings safely. Find a calm space to talk without distractions. Share your feelings without blaming your partner. For example, say, “I feel lonely when we don’t spend time together” to invite understanding instead of defensiveness.
Listening is just as important. Make sure to hear your partner’s side, showing empathy and support. This kind of communication helps solve immediate issues and strengthens your bond. Focus on finding a solution, allowing both of you to feel heard and valued.
Couples Therapy
Seeking couples therapy Calgary is a proactive way to deal with relationship problems. Therapy offers a safe space to discuss challenges with an objective guide. A good therapist helps you identify patterns, improve communication, and develop specific strategies for your situation.
Many couples find therapy helpful, even if they don’t think it’s necessary at first. It allows you to explore deeper issues and fosters intimacy through vulnerability. The therapist facilitates constructive dialogue that can lead to important insights. When you both work with a professional, it shows your commitment to each other and your desire to heal the relationship. This process can help you build new habits for lasting understanding.
Quality Time Together
Spending quality time together is key to repairing a strained relationship. Daily routines can dull the spark and make it hard to connect. A bit of effort goes a long way. Plan regular date nights or small activities you both enjoy. Whether it’s a picnic or cooking together, look for ways to create new memories.
Choose activities that promote interaction rather than just being in the same space. Doing a hobby together or trying new things can create positive experiences and rebuild your connection. These moments remind you of the love that brought you together and help counter conflict.
Counselling for Men
Many men find it hard to express their feelings and ask for help. However, counselling for men specifically for men can be very helpful for dealing with relationship issues. These programs focus on improving communication and breaking down emotional barriers, which helps men grow their emotional intelligence.
Men often feel pressure to seem strong and unemotional, which can make healing in a relationship difficult. Counselling provides a safe space to talk about feelings and learn how to express them in a healthy way. It helps remove obstacles and build a better understanding in the relationship. This support not only aids personal growth but also creates deeper connections with partners.
Conflict Resolution
Conflicts are a natural part of any relationship, but how you handle them is crucial. A mindful approach can reduce harm during disagreements. Instead of reacting with anger, take a moment to breathe and think. This pause allows for calm, thoughtful responses instead of impulsive reactions.
When issues arise, focus on solving the problem rather than attacking each other. Work together to find solutions that respect both partners’ needs. This way, you keep the relationship in mind while addressing concerns, leading to healthier resolutions.
Emotional Support
Supporting each other emotionally can strengthen your bond during tough times. Show genuine interest in each other’s feelings and experiences. Simple gestures, like a hug or words of encouragement, can make a big difference in how supported you feel in the relationship.
Pay attention to what your partner needs emotionally. During hard times, ask how you can help instead of assuming. This creates closeness and reassures both partners that they are cared for. Emotional support can help heal wounds and promote growth.
Repairing a relationship takes effort, patience, and commitment from both sides, but it can lead to incredible growth and understanding. Every step toward reconnecting helps create a healthier partnership. Remember, facing challenges with hope and an open mind can turn obstacles into chances for deeper connection.
Conclusion
A lot of relationship repair fails because both people treat it like a project that should be finished by the weekend. They have one good conversation, plan one date night, and then get frustrated when the old patterns show up again the following Tuesday. The work is slower than that. It is the small, repeated decisions to stay in the conversation when it would be easier to shut down, to ask one more clarifying question instead of assuming the worst, and to notice when your partner is trying even if the attempt is imperfect. Those moments do not feel dramatic. They just slowly change what the relationship feels like day to day. Most couples who actually rebuild trust do not do it through one big breakthrough. They do it by getting slightly better at the ordinary moments that used to go badly.
Dating & Relationships
How to Have a Successful Divorce
Going through a divorce can feel hard and confusing. It brings up strong emotions, and the choices you make now can affect your future. It’s not just about ending the marriage. It’s about moving forward positively. Knowing the steps can help make this time easier.
Divorce may seem tough, but there are ways to make it work. Planning and getting the right support can really help. From handling the details to looking after your feelings, there are practical steps you can take. Let’s look at how to make this change more manageable.
Finding the Right Support
Having the right support during a divorce matters. A Pittsburgh divorce lawyer can help you understand the process. They provide legal advice specific to your situation and explain your rights and duties. This support can reduce your stress and help you focus on other parts of your life.
Your lawyer will help you make informed decisions. They can negotiate fair terms, whether it’s about splitting assets, child custody, or support payments. Instead of feeling alone, you’ll have someone knowledgeable by your side to advocate for you. Their help can bring clarity when things feel overwhelming.
A divorce lawyer can also make the process smoother. They know what to expect and can help you avoid problems. Their guidance can save you time, energy, and stress, and help you have better discussions with your spouse.
Understanding Emotions
Divorce is an emotional experience. Accept feelings of sadness, anger, and even relief. Allowing yourself to experience these feelings is part of healing. Look after your mental health during this time. Family law lawyers can help.
A family law lawyer can assist with issues involving kids, custody, and family matters during a divorce. They understand the delicate process of separating families and can offer advice to reduce the emotional impact on everyone. Their goal is to help create a new family structure that works for you.
Working with a family law lawyer can help keep your children’s best interests a priority. They can help you develop a strong parenting plan that focuses on stability for your kids. Instead of fighting, their support can help you have respectful conversations and achieve better outcomes for everyone involved.
Creating a Clear Plan
Having a clear plan can help you stay grounded during a divorce. This plan serves as a guide for your actions and decisions. Start by outlining your main goals for the divorce. What do you want to achieve? Whether it’s financial stability, co-parenting arrangements, or a timeline for moving forward, knowing your goals helps you stay focused.
Get professional help early in the process. A financial advisor can help you understand your financial situation before and after the divorce. They can help you budget for life after divorce, including housing, education, and other important expenses. This combination of financial advice and legal guidance prepares you to handle challenges more effectively.
Communication is also important in creating a successful plan. Talk openly with your spouse about sensitive topics like money or children. This can create a cooperative environment. While not every discussion will be easy, focusing on clear communication can lead to friendly resolutions and reduce conflict.
Moving Forward Positively
Once things settle, focus on the future. Ending one chapter means starting another, and recognizing this can empower you. Look for chances for personal growth and self-discovery. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family who motivate you to redefine your goals.
Divorce can feel isolating, but remember that you are not alone. Many resources can help you during this transition, from support groups to counselling. These resources can give you strength as you build your new life.
The journey towards a successful divorce doesn’t have to be negative. By focusing on the right support, clear communication, and a solid plan, this big change can lead to new opportunities and brighter paths ahead.
Coping Strategies for Stress Relief
Divorce can be very stressful, so it’s important to find ways to manage that stress. Regular exercise can help improve your mood and clear your mind. Activities like yoga and meditation can help you relax and stay focused, making it easier to deal with strong emotions.
Journaling is another helpful tool. Writing down your thoughts and feelings can bring clarity and help you see patterns in your emotions. Make sure to make time for hobbies or activities you enjoy. Self-care is vital. It helps you recharge and face the challenges of divorce with strength.
Focus on Personal Growth
Although divorce is tough, it can also lead to personal growth. Use this time to reflect on your life goals and interests you may have ignored. Try new hobbies, sign up for classes, or explore interests you’ve always wanted to pursue. Setting personal goals can provide direction and a sense of achievement during this change.
It’s also important to learn from this experience. Think about what you want in future relationships and how you can improve your communication skills. Seizing this chance for self-improvement can lead to a more fulfilling and empowered future.
Dating & Relationships
Why Some Wealthy Men Keep Their Finances Private While Dating
In 2003, Fox built a reality series around what money does to a courtship. On Joe Millionaire, the women competing for Evan Marriott were told he had inherited $50 million. He was a construction worker earning about $19,000 a year, and roughly 40 million people watched the finale. The woman he chose learned the truth on camera, and the pair were given $1 million to share. Some wealthy men ask a version of that question in their own dating. They keep their net worth to themselves early in a relationship and watch how a partner treats them without it.
Wealth Signals and Perceived Intentions
Women tend to see showy spending by men as a sign of short-term interest, according to a 2011 paper in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. Jill Sundie and colleagues linked conspicuous spending by men to short-term mating motives, and the women in their studies interpreted it that way.
For a man who wants a long-term partner, early displays of money are a poor strategy. Leaving the car and the watch out of the first few meetings removes that signal. The first conversations then turn to his work and his family. He can also keep work details general at first, giving a job title without naming the company he owns or runs.
Leading with wealth also draws people who are interested mainly in the money, and in the first month there is no easy way to tell them apart. Privacy gives him time to see how a partner behaves without knowing the figure. Friends who watched him go through a divorce often advise caution too.
Venue choice is a signal as well. An expensive restaurant for a first meeting is a display of money even when none was intended. A coffee or a walk in a public park reveals little about income. Some men keep the first two or three dates modest for this reason and move to more expensive places once they know the person better. A short café meeting is also easy to end early if the conversation goes badly.
Private Choices in Dating
Discretion often extends to his dating life. A divorced executive may keep a new relationship from his adult children until it is serious. A man known in his city may avoid first dates at restaurants where people recognize him.
The kind of relationship he wants can stay private too. Someone hoping to find a sugar baby may tell few people until the relationship is established, as may a widower looking for a second marriage. Colleagues and relatives can hear about it once there is something settled to tell.
Romance Scams and Older Men
Privacy also has a security purpose. The Federal Trade Commission’s most recent report on financial fraud against older Americans found that adults 60 and older reported about $2.4 billion in fraud losses in 2024. The agency estimated actual losses at between $10.1 billion and $81.5 billion. Cases in which one victim lost more than $100,000 made up roughly 68% of the reported dollars. Social media, where many romance and cryptocurrency schemes begin, was the leading point of first contact.
Romance scammers usually avoid meeting in person. Money that stays out of the conversation until after several in-person dates is money most of them never learn about. The usual warning signs are a match who keeps finding reasons not to meet, pushes to move the conversation off the app within days, or raises an investment opportunity early.
Online Searches by Matches
Many matches will look him up. In a 2018 survey of 2,000 Americans on how many people Google a match before meeting, 38% said they always researched a person before a date. Women were more likely than men to check a date’s work history. A 2021 survey by the security company Avast found that 50% of dating app users had searched for a match online. Of those, 30% decided against meeting because of what they found or failed to find.
His privacy is limited by what is already public. Property records, a company biography or a news story about the sale of a business can show a date more than he planned to say on the first night. Using only a first name on the profile, and a separate phone number until the second meeting, makes it harder to connect him to those records. Searching his own name before he starts dating shows him what a match is likely to find.
Divorce History and Family Assets
At 50 or 60, a wealthy man who is dating has often been married before and may have divided his assets once already. Part of what he owns may be set aside for children from that marriage, through a trust, a family business or a promised inheritance. Describing all of it to a new partner early can create expectations about money he has no plan to share. He may also still pay support to a former spouse, an obligation that is his business until the relationship is serious.
Prenuptial agreements settle this before a marriage. Newsweek reported in 2023 that prenups are common beyond the wealthy, citing a 2022 Harris Poll in which 15% of Americans said they had signed one. Couples in that report used them to protect retirement accounts and homes brought into the marriage.
If he plans to ask for a prenup, he has reason to hold back details until then. Full disclosure is part of negotiating the agreement. Reviewing his finances once, with lawyers, is easier for both of them than discussing them piecemeal over dinner.
Disclosure Inside a Committed Relationship
In a 2025 Bankrate survey, 40% of people in committed relationships admitted to financial infidelity against their partner. The most common form was spending more than the partner would accept. Undisclosed debt and hidden bank accounts or credit cards came next. Younger adults were the most secretive, with 63% of Gen Z respondents and nearly half of millennials saying they kept money secrets.
Keeping net worth private in early dating is ordinary caution. Hidden accounts during a marriage put him in the group that survey describes, and the secrecy that protected him early becomes a risk to the marriage.
The Money Conversation Before Marriage
Viewers watched the Joe Millionaire finale to see if the woman would stay once she knew the truth. A wealthy man who waits too long puts a version of that question to a serious partner after she has already committed. He needs to show her the figures somewhere between the third month and the engagement. In Bankrate’s survey, 45% of respondents said financial secrets are as bad as physical cheating. A husband who reveals his finances only after the wedding risks being judged the way an unfaithful husband is judged. The same split shows up in getting the money right before a number becomes a fight.
Dating & Relationships
Simple Tips for Preparing to Get Married
Getting married is an exciting time filled with love and dreams, but it also requires a lot of planning. As you start this new chapter, remember that preparation is key to a strong wedding day and marriage. From finding the right venue to creating a shared vision for your future, the choices you make now will impact your life together.
Marriage is not just about celebrating love; it’s also about creating habits that help you both on your journey. It brings together your individual plans and shared goals. Let’s look at how you can get ready for your wedding and build a happy marriage.
Open Communication
Communication is essential for a healthy relationship. As you plan your wedding, take time to talk with your partner about your expectations and fears about marriage. This might be a little scary, but discussing the future helps you connect more deeply.
Set regular times to check in with each other. Share your thoughts openly so you can both express your concerns and dreams. The goal isn’t to fix every problem, but to strengthen your bond before the wedding. Creating a space where you both feel heard will deepen your connection over time.
Couples Counselling
Couples counselling Vancouver can be a helpful resource for engaged couples. It offers a safe space to explore your relationship and understand how your backgrounds affect your interactions. This does not mean there are problems. It’s a chance for growth and understanding.
Working with a counsellor helps you discuss topics like finances and family traditions in a supportive setting. Learning to see your partner’s point of view and finding common ground can improve your relationship. Many couples leave counselling sessions feeling more connected and better prepared for future challenges. It’s not just a solution for problems. It’s about building a strong foundation for your life together.
Budgeting Wisely
Understanding your finances is important as you plan your wedding. Start by making a budget that includes everything, from the venue to the flowers. This process should involve both of you and can help you grow closer.
Sit down together and look at your financial situation. Talk about how much you can realistically spend and what matters most to you. By figuring out your priorities, you can reduce stress as the big day gets closer. Creating a budget together promotes teamwork and respect, essential for a strong marriage.
Planning Together
Planning your wedding can feel overwhelming, but it’s also a great chance to work together. Divide tasks based on your strengths and preferences. If one of you is good at décor and the other at organization, assign responsibilities accordingly.
Hold regular planning meetings to stay organized and build excitement for the day. These sessions can strengthen your partnership in unexpected ways. Combining practicality and creativity makes planning enjoyable and shows you can work as a team.
Creating Shared Goals
Talking about future goals is vital as you prepare for marriage. Whether it’s career plans, travel dreams, or thoughts about having children, aligning your visions can deepen your connection. Keep this conversation ongoing and adjust as life changes, but initial talks are crucial.
Explore your individual dreams and then see how they fit together. Picture where you want to be in five or ten years and plan how to reach those goals as a couple. This collaboration strengthens your relationship and creates a supportive environment for your marriage.
Self-Care Focus
In the busy time of wedding planning, don’t forget to take care of yourselves. Remind each other to find time for relaxation and enjoyment. Doing things that recharge you individually helps you bring your best selves to the relationship.
Whether it’s reading a book or going out with friends, putting self-care first benefits both partners. When you feel happy and balanced on your own, it positively affects your partnership. Check in with each other about your emotional well-being during the planning process to ensure consistent support.
Build a Support Network
Don’t hesitate to ask friends and family for help while you plan your wedding. A good support network can lessen the stress that often comes with planning. Surrounding yourselves with loved ones who care about your happiness creates a positive atmosphere as the big day approaches.
Trust your relationship counselling network to provide help, support, and inspiration. Whether it’s sharing wedding ideas or lending a hand, these connections can bring joy during a busy time. Sharing the experience can make your engagement feel less overwhelming and more celebratory.
As you get ready for your wedding, remember that these moments are about nurturing your relationship as much as the event itself. What truly matters is the connection you build along the way. Embrace the journey and let it reflect your love.
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