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Success Advice

Working Hard Isn’t the Answer to True Success but Self Care is

After working hard all my life and bullying myself into doing things, I didn’t get the results I wanted. All I got was more stress

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If you’re like me, at some point in your life, you thought that to be successful, you must work hard and go hard! Maybe you still believe that, and I get you. I mean, how on earth can you be a productive human if you leave yourself off the hook?

That’s a question I struggled with for the longest time. But after working hard all my life and bullying myself into doing things, I didn’t get the results I wanted, all I got was more stress and more things to work hard at. And that wasn’t the result I was looking for because working hard isn’t the answer to true success, but self care is. 

I hoped that after all the hustle, I could eventually catch a break. Instead, I worked until I broke down and then had to start everything all over again, repeatedly. It was exhausting!

I’m not going to lie; I achieved some milestones this way. But I suffered throughout and couldn’t even feel happy for myself. And I don’t think that’s real success. I feel successful when I have fun going after what I want and infuse my days with joy and peacefulness, even when I’m not being productive. 

I’m successful when I rest without feeling guilty and am not afraid of wasting time; I see it as charging my batteries.

The truly successful version of me is a badass who achieves all her goals, but she does all that while taking care of herself so she doesn’t crash and burn now and then. And here’s the best part: she is happy AF while chasing her dreams, not only when and if she gets there.

If you get excited by this approach, you’ll love the top three best self-care strategies for true success I’m sharing with you!

#1 Schedule joy

I know some of you may cringe when you read the words ‘schedule’ and ‘joy’ together, but hear me out: how many times were you so caught up on work or study or maybe lifting your business off the ground that you stopped hanging out with your friends and doing the things that bring you joy?

Some people online preach that you must sacrifice everything and only focus on your goals to be successful, but I say it’s the opposite! Good friends will keep you sane and grounded and reassure you that you’re not alone. 

Doing things that bring you joy will energize you, spark your inspiration, and make you more productive and prone to taking action on your dreams and goals!

So yes, schedule that joy before you get trapped in the busyness, and enjoy being successful and happy!

#2 Practice bringing yourself back to the beauty of the present moment

Most of our stress comes from worrying too much about the future and focusing excessively on the past as if looking for proof of what can go wrong. And we know that’s not very success-friendly, right?

It will only make you nervous, cloud your judgment, and hurt your decision-making ability. I say yes to projecting, visualizing a bright future, and sometimes looking at the past so we don’t repeat the same mistakes. 

But please, always bring yourself to the present moment because it’s in the now that you can do what’s best for you and your goals.

There are many ways to practice being present. You can practice gratitude, mindfulness, and meditation, but I want to share a simple strategy that I love: Mindful alarms!

Grab your phone and set up three to five alarms for different times of the day. On the alarm label, write down a short reminder. It can be ‘Take a deep breath’ or ‘Back to the present moment’ or whatever you want, really. 

Make it yours! The most important thing here is multiple alarms popping up to remind you to be present.

But wait, there’s an extra benefit to this; you’ll check in with yourself throughout the day and automatically release stress and tension! Sounds amazing, right?

#3 Work with your energy levels, not against them

Let’s face it; we all wish we were on our A-game all the time. But that’s simply impossible. We’re human, and the most natural thing is to have our energy fluctuate, especially if we’re women with a cycle.

If you’re driven, I know this probably irritates you a lot. And I’m with you because yeah, it can be very frustrating! But we have got to choose here: We can either fight it, get even more frustrated, make mistakes, and deliver averagely, or embrace it and make it work for us.

Ready to choose option number two?

When working with our energy levels, we can go hard when we feel more energetic and make the most out of our peak times, and when we’re feeling low, honor that and focus on valuable but less demanding tasks.  

I understand this may be challenging for many, especially if you don’t make your own schedule, but I invite you to see it as something to embody rather than implement every second of the day. Instead of pushing yourself to do more and beating yourself up because you’re not at your high-performance level, embrace it. You’re only human.

And have you noticed these days are great for connecting with your intuition and reevaluating things? That is as important, if not more than the going-hard part of success if you ask me.

Here’s how I see success and self-care:

The key to true success is not to focus on the top of the mountain but to ensure you enjoy your way there and have everything necessary to journey comfortably. 

Yes, your feet may still hurt at the end of the day, but you can choose whether to wear uncomfortable shoes and never stop unless you’re about to break down or to put on your best mountain boots and take a break to appreciate the view and rest from time to time.

So remember the three self-care strategies for success: schedule your joy, keep bringing yourself back to the present moment, and work with your energy levels (not against them). You deserve to honor yourself and your needs on your way to success.

Erika Sardinha is an empowerment coach for survivors based in the Canary Islands. Her purpose is to help survivors like her reconnect with themselves, heal, and thrive from the inside out. She offers online courses, private and group coaching, and other services for thriving survivors while providing various free resources to her community. Check Erika's Free Community of badass thriving survivors: Happy Survivors Tribe, and access her 10-minute Guided Tapping Meditation for True Relaxation and Joy!

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Success Advice

11 Mark Manson Lessons That’ll Redefine Success in the Digital Age

Success in the digital age isn’t about hacks, it’s about the raw, real lessons Mark Manson actually lives by.

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Mark Manson life lessons on success
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In 2016, Mark Manson released The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, a brutally honest, thought-provoking book that redefined self-help for a new generation. (more…)

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Change Your Mindset

The Secret Daily Routines Behind History’s Most Brilliant Thinkers

Uncover the daily rituals and hidden habits that powered history’s most brilliant minds to success.

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Why Daily Rituals Matter

Every great achiever has one thing in common: discipline. Behind the novels, inventions, discoveries, and masterpieces are small, consistent habits repeated daily. (more…)

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Did You Know

How to Turn a Simple Link-in-Bio Into a Powerful Brand Hub

Transform your forgotten bio link into a high-impact gateway that fuels engagement, clicks, and conversions across every social platform.

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Social media is one of the greatest marketing tools in 2025. According to a recent study, some 86% of marketers globally use platforms like Facebook and Instagram for advertisements, while 94% use it for content distribution.  (more…)

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Personal Development

These 11 Habits Will Make You More Productive, Successful, and Confident

Boost your focus, confidence, and results with 11 powerful habits successful people use every day.

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Successful people love to help beginners. They have an incredible work ethic and rarely complain. As a result, others naturally look up to them and want to follow in their footsteps.

But here’s the truth: there’s no success without sacrifice. You’ll need to give up comfort, excuses, and sometimes even social approval to accomplish your goals.

Value comes from solving problems, and these 11 powerful tips will help you become more productive, successful, and confident, starting today.

1. Take Short Breaks After Finishing a Task

Psychology shows it’s important to reward positive behaviour.

After completing a big task or finishing a book, take five minutes to walk, stretch, or simply breathe. This quick reset helps your brain recharge and strengthens focus.

Many great writers swear by morning walks, solitude, and reflection can unlock creativity.

But if you refuse to take breaks, don’t be surprised when burnout hits. Your brain needs recovery time just as much as your body does.

2. Schedule Your Most Important Tasks First

Multitasking kills productivity. If you want to get more done, try time blocking, a method where you dedicate set periods for specific tasks.

Productivity expert Caitlin Hughes explains, “Time blocking involves scheduling blocks of time for your tasks throughout the day.”

For example, if you’re a writer:

  • Research your topic at night.

  • Write your first draft in the morning (don’t worry if it’s rough).

  • Edit in the afternoon, great writing comes from rewriting.

You can’t buy more time. Use it intentionally and without regret.

3. Eliminate Distractions from Your Workspace

Focus is the foundation of success.

According to Inc. Magazine, it takes an average of 23 minutes to recover from a distraction. That’s nearly half an hour of lost productivity every time you check your phone.

Put your phone away. Close unnecessary tabs. And yes, limit your Netflix binges.

Meeting deadlines consistently is one of the fastest ways to stand out and earn respect.

4. Take Full Responsibility for Your Life

Entrepreneur Derek Sivers once said, “Everything is my fault.”

This mindset doesn’t mean self-blame; it means self-ownership. Stop pointing fingers, making excuses, or waiting for others to change.

If your habits (like smoking or drinking too much) hold you back, it’s time to make better choices. Your friends can’t live your dreams for you; only you can.

5. Invest an Hour a Day in Learning New Skills

Knowledge compounds over time.

Whether you read books, take online courses, or practise a craft, consistent learning gives you a competitive edge.

I used to struggle with academic writing, but I improved by studying the work of great authors and applying what I learned.

Your past doesn’t define you; your actions do. Every new skill adds another tool to your arsenal and makes you more unstoppable.

6. Develop a Growth Mindset

Psychologist Dr. Carol Dweck introduced the concept of fixed vs. growth mindset.

  • A fixed mindset believes success is based on natural talent.

  • A growth mindset believes success comes from effort and learning.

Choose the growth mindset. Embrace challenges. See failures as feedback. In today’s fast-moving digital world, adaptability is your biggest advantage.

7. Learn Marketing to Reach People Who Need You

I once believed marketing was manipulative, until I realised it’s about helping people solve problems.

If your work provides genuine value, marketing is how you let others know it exists. Even Apple spends billions on it.

Don’t be ashamed to promote your skills or business. Without visibility, your ideas will never reach the people who need them most.

Creative professionals who understand marketing and sales have an unfair advantage.

8. Ask Your Mentor the Right Questions

Good mentors can fast-track your growth.

While mentorship often costs money, it’s one of the best investments you can make. Great mentors don’t care about titles; they care about your progress.

If you don’t have access to a mentor yet, books are your silent mentors. Read the best in your field, take notes, and apply what resonates.

9. Build Confidence Through Action, Not Affirmations

Author Ryan Holiday once said, “I don’t believe in myself. I have evidence.”

Confidence doesn’t come from shouting affirmations into the mirror; it comes from proof. Doing hard things, keeping promises to yourself, and following through.

When you consistently take action, your brain gathers evidence that you can handle whatever comes next. That’s real confidence, grounded, earned, and unshakable.

10. Focus on Your Strengths

Your strengths reveal where your greatest impact lies.

If people compliment you on something often, it’s a clue. Lean into it.

A former professor once told me I was creative, and that simple comment gave me the confidence to go all in. I studied creativity, applied it daily, and turned it into my career advantage.

Double down on your strengths. That’s how you build momentum and mastery.

11. Identify and Challenge Your Limiting Beliefs

Your beliefs shape your reality.

For years, I believed I couldn’t be a great writer because of my chronic tinnitus and astigmatism, sensory challenges that made concentration difficult. But over time, I realised those struggles made me more disciplined, observant, and empathetic.

Your limitations can become your greatest motivators if you let them.

Avoid shortcuts. Growth takes time, but it’s always worth it.

Final Thoughts

Becoming productive, successful, and confident isn’t about working harder than everyone else. It’s about working smarter, consistently, and intentionally.

You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight. Start small: take a break after your next task, schedule your priorities, or spend one hour learning something new.

Every habit you change compounds into long-term success. Remember, true change comes from practising new behaviours.

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