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Why You Need to Have Fun With Your Fears to Succeed

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Midjourney

Do you know anyone who doesn’t experience fear on some level? You don’t because that is not possible, even if you think you might. Fear is part of our physiology and psychology and it is a natural reaction to real or perceived danger. You will never ever reach a point in life when you won’t feel fear anymore; because it is part of us on a very deep level, it is part of our survival.

As long as you live on this earth you will feel fear. If you are serious about being in the driver’s seat of your life and making a success of it, you absolutely have to adopt better strategies to manage it. If it looks like some people never get gripped by fear, it’s only because they direct their fears. They don’t let their fears direct them.

So do you want to know how to use your fears instead of your fears using you?  Tony Robbins said it best when he said that fear is never rewarded, but courage is.  And I’m guessing you like rewards right?  So my invitation to you is to start having fun with your fears instead, they are part of you.

Here is how you can own your fears in 3 steps:

Step 1: Fear in itself is not the problem

You need to understand this. Just like procrastination or anger for example, your body is simply telling you something. The problem actually comes in with how you deal with it. If you are courageous and you look at your fear, you will be rewarded. If you don’t, it will forever remain an obstacle until you choose to.  To do this, you need to take the emotion out of it and get strategic.

“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do.” – Henry Ford

Step 2: Check in with reality and look at your fear

So many people say, “I want to be successful, but I don’t know what is stopping me, so I’m going to give up.” What they are really saying is, “I want this great and amazing life, but I also want to stay in my comfort zone and have it come to me really easy.” Can you see the paradox here? This is why so many people stay in no man’s land. What I am saying is until you are ready and willing to get comfortable with being uncomfortable, you won’t change your life very much. If you want change, you have to change and if you want more, you have to be more.

Step 3: Come up with your game plan, your winning strategy

You are in the driver’s seat, this is your chance to have fun with this. It’s a good time now to remind yourself that you will attract the exact experiences you need to grow, and so most of the time, it is really in your best interest to move towards them strategically. Your biggest challenges are your biggest growth.

The golden rule in any decision making is to write it down, get it out of your head. And the decision you are making is “am I going to dance with this fear and win or not?” You want to get clear on the reward of following through with facing this fear. This is the real juice, so don’t skip this part. Right now, your mind has come up with reasons why you shouldn’t, you want to counteract that with double the reasons why you should.

“Fears are nothing more than a state of mind.” – Napoleon Hill

What will it feel like when you surpass your fears and you are on the other side looking back? What will it mean to you? How will it change your life and the people around you? Who will you become by doing this? Really dig into why this is a MUST HAVE and why you should be excited to do this.

Now that you are juiced up and excited, you are ready to come up with a strategy. Write down what you are going to do to prepare for this or to feel better about taking this on. Come up with a game plan that will make you feel better. The more time you spend here, the easier it will be to move forward. The less time, the harder. Don’t forget that your environment might trigger the fear, but how you manage it is your choice.

Are you going to dance with your fears and make them fun or are you going to stay in the back seat struggling for success? Leave your thoughts below!

Kirstin O’Donovan is a “multinational” productivity coach, author and founder of TopResultsCoaching an international company providing coaching services in nearly a dozen countries. With over 10 years working in the field of coaching and personal development, she provides her expertise to help individuals create the life and results they desire.   Kirstin also writes for various international publications in personal development. Kirstin, a certified NLP Practitioner, holds various qualifications, certificates and credentials related to personal and business coaching. She is the author of ‘Maximize your time to maximize your profit’ and Co-Author of ‘The Confident Woman’ and ‘There is GOLD inside YOU.’

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Success Advice

Why One-Size-Fits-All Leadership Will Always Fail (and What Works Instead)

The surprising truth about leadership styles that can make or break your team’s success.

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Leadership has always been as much about people as it is about performance. Ken Blanchard, in his influential book, “The One Minute Manager”, put it simply: different strokes for different folks. (more…)

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The Leadership Shift Every Company Needs in 2025

Struggling to keep your team engaged? Here’s how leaders can turn frustrated employees into loyal advocates.

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Bridging the gap between employees and employers
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In workplaces around the world, there’s a growing gap between employers and employees and between superiors and their teams. It’s a common refrain: “People don’t leave companies, they leave bad bosses.”

While there are, of course, cases where management could do better, this isn’t just a “bad boss” problem. The relationship between leaders and employees is complex. Instead of assigning blame, we should explore practical solutions to build stronger, healthier workplaces where everyone thrives.

Why This Gap Exists

Every workplace needs someone to guide, supervise, and provide feedback. That’s essential for productivity and performance. But because there are usually far more employees than managers, dissatisfaction, fair or not, spreads quickly.

What if, instead of focusing on blame, we focused on building trust, empathy, and communication? This is where modern leadership and human-centered management can make a difference.

Tools and Techniques to Bridge the Gap

Here are proven strategies leaders and employees can use to foster stronger relationships and create a workplace where people actually want to stay.

1. Practice Mutual Empathy

Both managers and employees need to recognize they are ultimately on the same team. Leaders have to balance people and performance, and often face intense pressure to hit targets. Employees who understand this reality are more likely to cooperate and problem-solve collaboratively.

2. Maintain Professional Boundaries

Superiors should separate personal issues from professional decision-making. Consistency, fairness, and integrity build trust, and trust is the foundation of a motivated team.

3. Follow the Golden Rule

Treat people how you would like to be treated. This simple principle encourages compassion and respect, two qualities every effective leader must demonstrate.

4. Avoid Micromanagement

Micromanaging stifles creativity and damages morale. Great leaders see themselves as partners, not just bosses, and treat their teams as collaborators working toward a shared goal.

5. Empower Employees to Grow

Empowerment means giving employees responsibility that matches their capacity, and then trusting them to deliver. Encourage them to take calculated risks, learn from mistakes, and problem-solve independently. If something goes wrong, turn it into a learning opportunity, not a reprimand.

6. Communicate in All Directions

Communication shouldn’t just be top-down. Invite feedback, create open channels for suggestions, and genuinely listen to what your people have to say. Healthy upward communication closes gaps before they become conflicts.

7. Overcome Insecurities

Many leaders secretly fear being outshone by younger, more tech-savvy employees. Instead of resisting, embrace the chance to learn from them. Humility earns respect and helps the team innovate faster.

8. Invest in Coaching and Mentorship

True leaders grow other leaders. Provide mentorship, career guidance, and stretch opportunities so employees can develop new skills. Leadership is learned through experience, but guided experience is even more powerful.

9. Eliminate Favoritism

Avoid cliques and office politics. Decisions should be based on facts and fairness, not gossip. Objective, transparent decision-making builds credibility.

10. Recognize Efforts Promptly

Recognition often matters more than rewards. Publicly appreciate employees’ contributions and do so consistently and fairly. A timely “thank you” can be more motivating than a quarterly bonus.

11. Conduct Thoughtful Exit Interviews

When employees leave, treat it as an opportunity to learn. Keep interviews confidential and use the insights to improve management practices and culture.

12. Provide Leadership Development

Train managers to lead, not just supervise. Leadership development programs help shift mindsets from “command and control” to “coach and empower.” This transformation has a direct impact on morale and retention.

13. Adopt Soft Leadership Principles

Today’s workforce, largely millennials and Gen Z, value collaboration over hierarchy. Soft leadership focuses on partnership, mutual respect, and shared purpose, rather than rigid top-down control.

The Bigger Picture: HR’s Role

Mercer’s global research highlights five key priorities for organizations:

  • Build diverse talent pipelines

  • Embrace flexible work models

  • Design compelling career paths

  • Simplify HR processes

  • Redefine the value HR brings

The challenge? Employers and employees often view these priorities differently. Bridging that perception gap is just as important as bridging the relational gap between leaders and staff.

Treat Employees Like Associates, Not Just Staff

When you treat employees like partners, they bring their best selves to work. HR leaders must develop strategies to keep talent engaged, empowered, and prepared for the future.

Organizational success starts with people, always. Build the relationship with your team first, and the results will follow.

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Entrepreneurs

What Makes an Entrepreneurial Leader? Traits of the World’s Best Innovators

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